Contentedly Ever After
It’s one of the biggest cover-ups in history that the Grimm brothers were not fairy tale writers at all, but rather part of a marketing team hired by the ruling class of Europe. Their job was to take the marriage stories of the reigning monarchs and spin them into fairy tales with a happy ending. I am here to shed light on one of those stories.
My name is Flora, better known as the miller’s daughter, and this is the story of Rumpelstiltskin, minus all the lies and deceit. Let’s begin with the facts.
My father indeed bragged to the king that I could spin straw into gold. He did it to elevate his own status with absolutely no concern for my well-being. I hate that jackass. It is also true that the king locked me in a bedchamber for three straight nights and told me that if I didn’t spin the roomful of straw into gold, he would murder me. And finally, it is true that Rumpelstiltskin saved my life and that in desperation, I agreed to give him my firstborn child as payment for his deed.
That’s where the similarities end. Rumpelstiltskin didn’t spin straw into gold. We don’t live in a world of magical things like the Grimm brothers would have us believe.
Rumpelstiltskin was a very rich man who brought bags of his own personal gold to give to the king in order to save my life. At the time, I didn’t understand why this small hunchbacked man would do that for me, but there was a good reason.
On the fourth day, as promised, the king married me. Not because he loved me, but purely out of greed. Neither he nor my father gave a flying fig in space that I was against this marriage. So here I was, stuck with this greedy, obnoxious man whose face and personality made me gag. His halitosis was unparalleled. The king and I never shared a bedroom, though those first few weeks were a horror. He would visit me in the night, and afterward demand more gold. When I explained that my powers were used up, he never came to my bedchamber again. He rotated through a string of mistresses, and that was okay with me.
Ten months into our marriage, I gave birth to a baby boy, and he became my reason for existing. When the king tried to take the boy away from me and have him raised by the royal nannies, I knew I had to escape that toxic environment. I couldn’t take a chance that Prince George would grow up to be like his father. I tried to sneak him out of the palace, but guards were watching my every move. The king considered both the prince and me to be his possessions, and I was treated like a prisoner.
Just when I was at the end of my worn and tattered rope, Rumpelstiltskin appeared and saved me for the fourth time. He returned to the palace allegedly to claim my child, his prize for saving my life. He brought with him a gold bullion, a gift for the king to ensure his entrance into the palace.
When he approached me, I began to wail, begging him not to take my son. But he calmed me down and explained he wanted to help, and I felt like I had no choice but to trust him. His plan was to announce that I had three days to guess his name, and if I failed, he would claim the child as his own. In reality, he arranged for our escape. He told me to pack a bag of necessities for George and get myself expelled from the palace.
Rumpel smuggled George out of the castle hidden in a laundry bag, and the two of them vanished as if they never existed. The king couldn’t track them down. He became so enraged that he stomped his left foot so hard it crashed through the wooden floor. He then banished me from the kingdom with the decree that if I should ever try to step foot in the palace again, I would be murdered on the spot.
I was saved. With the money Rumpel gave me stashed in my petticoat, I made my escape. I bought a horse and rode to the secret location, where he waited for me with George. Together, we boarded a boat to the Americas and changed our identities.
I once asked Rumpel why he helped me. After all, I was just a poor girl, a miller’s daughter with nothing to my name and a very bleak future. He had risked everything for me. His gold, his business, and his whole future.
This is what he said. He had spotted me in the marketplace and was drawn in by my beauty. When he approached me to purchase some bread, I didn’t look down upon him for his ugliness but instead treated him with kindness. He fell in love.
After an arduous, months-long journey, we made it to the Americas. Rumpel had enough money left over to purchase a large plot of land, which we turned into a farm. We share our home with two dogs, fifty pigs, and two hundred cows.
Sadly, Rumpel and I could never marry because technically, I am still married to the king, but we do masquerade as husband and wife. I sometimes hear murmurings that the townsfolk call us Beauty and the Beast, and they gossip that I married Rumpel for his money. I don’t care. All I care about is that George, now known as Henry, is thriving and growing up well.
Unlike the fairy tale, this story does not end in a happily ever after. I am still quite scarred from all I’ve been through, and I live in constant fear that one day the king will find us. I rarely leave the farm. Rumpel takes care of all the business in town and brings Henry to school. Meanwhile, I’m kept very busy taking care of the animals, cooking meals, and raising my son.
I have become quite fond of Rumpel and enjoy his company. He is a good father to Henry. I am content.