Relief flooded Jerry as he stared at his mother’s shopping list and crossed off the last item. He was happy to do her a favor. She’d always bent over backward to take care of both his sister and him. But he despised grocery shopping and would rather be anywhere else than the market.
He glanced at the lunch meat counter as he pushed his grocery cart toward the cashier. When his eyes fell on a young woman who looked like Clara, he stilled. She said something to the Amish man behind the counter and then laughed.
Jerry grinned. Yes, that was Clara. He’d never mistake her laugh. He adored the sweet, rich sound that seemed to fill the room with warmth, and it tugged at his heartstrings.
He leaned forward on the cart and continued to study her. She looked radiant in a cranberry-colored dress that complemented her gorgeous coffee-colored eyes and the dark-brown hair he could glimpse from beneath her prayer covering. She was always pretty when they were growing up together, but she seemed somehow different now—more mature with her long, slender neck and high cheekbones.
He’d imagined the eager young men in her youth group would jump at the chance to date someone as beautiful, sweet, and funny as she was. A few of his friends had even confessed they wanted to date her after they were baptized.
Jealousy was a bitter taste in his mouth.
He mentally shook himself. Why should he care if Clara dated his friends? He’d met lots of pretty girls in the bars his English friends invited him to. Besides, he wasn’t even Amish. Any relationship with her beyond friendship was forbidden. In fact, she would be shunned if she dated him.
Not that she would even be interested in him.
In a flash, she turned toward him. He’d been caught.
“Jerry!” She waved. “How long have you been standing there staring at me?”
“Staring at you?” He straightened and clicked his tongue. “What makes you think I was staring at you? I was looking for roast beef, but you were blocking my way.” He pushed the cart toward her.
She laughed, and he enjoyed the sound once again. “What brings you here today?”
He pointed to the shopping cart. “Mei mamm gave me a list.”
“Shouldn’t you be at work?”
“I finished a job early, so I thought I’d be a dutiful sohn and see if mei mamm needed anything at the market.” He rolled his eyes. “I think she was waiting for my call.”
“Well, that was nice of you.” She set a bag in the shopping basket hanging on her arm. “I had to get lunch meat and rolls to share at Emma’s today. It’s my turn to bring the snack.”
“Let me take that.” He reached for the basket, and when his hand brushed hers, he felt a flare of heat. Had she felt it too? Her eyes didn’t show any reaction, so he must have imagined it. He set her basket in his cart.
“Danki.” She walked beside him toward the cashier. “It’s hot out there today, huh?”
“Ya.” He nodded. “It feels like summer.”
“It sure does.” She fingered her black apron. Was she nervous? They never had any trouble talking at school or youth group.
“Is Biena coming to help at the garden today?” she asked.
“Ya. I’m supposed to drop her off a little later.”
“Great. She’s gut help.” She paused for a moment. “Maybe I’ll get to see you for a minute or two when you drop her off.”
“That sounds gut.” Did she want to see him as much as he wanted to see her?
When they reached the cashier, Clara put her items on the counter and paid. Then she turned to him and gave him another wave. “It was gut seeing you.”
“You too.” He smiled at her. “Take care.”
“Hopefully I’ll see you later at Emma’s.”
“Ya.”
As she disappeared through the doors, he longed to ask her to wait for him. He quickly paid for his groceries and then hurried out to the parking lot. He loaded his bags into his toolbox and then motored across the lot, where he spotted Clara heading toward the road. Had she walked to the grocery store? If so, this was the perfect opportunity to spend more time with her.
“Hey there,” he said through the cab’s open window as he drove alongside her. “Need a ride to Emma’s?”
She touched her chin as if debating her answer, and her brown eyes sparkled with mischief. “Mei mamm told me not to accept rides from strangers.”
“What if I tell you my name before you get in?”
She laughed as he stopped the truck.
“Please get in,” he said.
“Fine.” She jogged around the front of the truck, wrenched open the door and climbed into the passenger seat before pulling the door shut. She glanced around the cab as she fastened her seat belt. “This is a nice truck. I like it.”
“Danki.” He steered through the parking lot. “I bought it from mei onkel.”
“What year is it?”
“It’s a 1964 Chevrolet.”
“Wow. It’s a lot older than we are, huh?” She ran her hand over the dashboard.
“I needed a truck, and the price was right.” He pulled onto the road.
“Why don’t we stop at your parents’ haus first and pick up Biena? Then you can drop both of us off at Emma’s.”
“That’s a gut idea.” He turned toward the road that led to his parents’ house and glanced at her. “Why did you walk to the market instead of calling a driver?”
The breeze from the open window caused the ties on her prayer covering to flutter over her slight shoulders. “It’s a schee day, and it’s not far from mei haus to the market and then to Emma’s. I couldn’t justify wasting money on a ride on a day like this.” Her smile faded. “You’re not going to charge me, are you?”
“Are you serious?” he deadpanned.
“No.” She laughed, and then her expression became almost pensive. “Tell me, Jerry. You told me you live at your onkel’s haus and work for his plumbing business, but other than that, where have you been for five years?”
“Why? Have you been looking for me?”
“No.” She shook her head, and he was almost certain she blushed. “I just wonder what you were up to. When I asked your family how you were, they said you were fine, but not much else. And I didn’t want to pry.”
She asked about me? The notion took him by surprise for a moment, trapping his words in his throat.
“So where were you hiding?” She leaned forward, her eyes almost flirty.
“I wasn’t hiding anywhere,” he insisted. “I told you, I’ve just been living with my onkel and working.”
“Huh. It’s funny that I haven’t run into you before now, although I saw you from a distance around town a few times.” She tilted her head. “We had a lot of fun in school, didn’t we?”
“Yeah, we did,” he agreed with a grin. “You always made me laugh with jokes during class. We got in trouble more than once thanks to you making a funny face when we were supposed to be listening.”
“Ya, but mei mamm didn’t think it was funny when we had to stay after to clean because Teacher Marian said we were ‘disruptive.’” She made air quotes with her fingers as if to quote the teacher. “But we thought it was hilarious.”
She looked out the window and then at him once again. “I always appreciated how you defended me on the playground when Roy Zook used to make fun of how I threw the softball or missed a hit.” She rolled her eyes. “He made recess a nightmare for me.”
He frowned. “I never could stand him after that.”
“But you took care of him, didn’t you?” She leaned over again, and he caught a whiff of her flowery shampoo.
Why did the aroma make his pulse race?
He did a mental headshake.
“Didn’t you?” she repeated the question.
He shrugged as if it weren’t a big deal that he had, in fact, found a way to stop the bullying.
“What did you do?” She poked his arm.
“I simply told Roy if he didn’t leave you alone, I would tell everyone in class about the time he cried like a baby after falling out of a tree when we were six.”
Her grin widened. “What happened?”
“You already know his farm is located on the same street as mei dat’s,” he began, and she nodded. “We decided to climb that big cherry tree in my yard. He fell out and skinned his knees, and then he sobbed for his mamm for nearly an hour. He made me promise I would never tell anyone because he was afraid his three older bruders would harass him.”
He signaled and steered onto the long dirt road that led to his father’s place. “One day when he made you cry, I’d had enough. I followed him home and told him if he ever teased you again, I would tell the details of that day not just to his bruders, but to the entire class.”
She gasped. “You didn’t!”
“I most certainly did.”
“This is why I declared you my best freind when we were ten.”
He felt a strange stirring in his chest at her words. Why was he so emotional today?
As if oblivious to his inner turmoil, Clara gazed out the windshield as his father’s brick, two-story farmhouse came into view. She smiled at him. “I spent a lot of time here as a kid. I still remember playing softball with you, Biena, and our freinden in your dat’s big field. We had so much fun.”
“Yeah, we sure did.” He parked the truck by the back porch and pushed open his door.
She hopped down from the truck and went around to his side. “Is your mamm home?”
“She should be.” He retrieved the grocery bags from the toolbox. “Let’s see.”
He followed her up the porch steps and into the house. When they stepped into the kitchen from the mudroom, they found his mother standing at the counter, flipping through a cookbook.
“Hi, Saloma!” Clara rushed over and gave her a hug.
Jerry grinned as he set the grocery bags on the table. Clara had never been shy with her affection.
“Clara!” Mamm exclaimed. “What a nice surprise.” She turned to Jerry, her eyebrows lifted. “I didn’t expect you to bring Clara home with the groceries.”
Clara chuckled. “We ran into each other at the market, and he offered to give me a ride to Emma’s haus.”
“Isn’t that nice.” Mamm’s expression seemed to hold something other than mirth, giving him pause. What was she planning?
Clara moved to the table and began opening the bags. “Why don’t I help you put your groceries away?”
“Oh no.” Mamm waved off the offer. “You can get on to Emma’s haus. I think Biena is ready to go too. She just went upstairs to get something.”
“I’ll get her.” Jerry went to the hallway and stood at the bottom of the stairs. “Beanie! Are you ready to go to Emma’s?”
“I’ve told you not to call me that!” Biena growled from the second floor.
Jerry snickered as he leaned on the banister.
“Are you still teasing her?” Clara appeared in the kitchen doorway.
“Isn’t that my job as her big bruder?”
“No, it’s not!” Biena snapped as she started down the stairs. “He should respect his younger schweschder.”
“You know I love you.” He smirked at Biena, and she rolled her eyes. “Hey, I came by to pick you up, didn’t I?”
“You had to come anyway since you picked up Mamm’s groceries.” Biena reached the bottom stair and smiled at Clara. “Clara. I didn’t realize you were here.”
“Your bruder found me at the market and dragged me here.” Clara bumped his shoulder, and he enjoyed the easy teasing.
“Yup. I threw her into the truck as she kicked and screamed.” He motioned toward the back of the house. “We should go.”
He followed the women into the kitchen, where Biena hugged Mamm.
“I’ll be back for supper,” Biena said.
“Have fun.” Mamm waved at Clara. “It was nice seeing you.”
“You too.” Clara waved back. “I’ll see you at church.” As she left the kitchen with Biena, Jerry started to follow.
“Jerry,” Mamm said, and he spun to face her. “It’s gut seeing you with Clara again. It’s been a long time since you two used to spend time together. I’m froh you’ve reconnected because of Emma’s garden.”
So she wasn’t just happy to see Clara. She was thrilled to see him with Clara.
Jerry couldn’t keep his lips from pressing into a flat line. His mother hadn’t brought up his lack of commitment to the Amish church for a very long time, yet he could tell the familiar lecture was forming in her mind.
“You and Clara were always such gut freinden, and you can’t deny that you care about her. Obviously, she hasn’t married, and I don’t remember hearing that she’s ever dated anyone for long. If you came back to the church, maybe that friendship could turn into something more.” Mamm’s bright-blue eyes glittered with hope.
He swallowed back the frustrated words that threatened to jump from his lips. His parents would never understand why he didn’t feel the same connection to the church they did, that he’d never felt God calling him to join the church. And he didn’t want their lectures to start again. They just added to the guilt he already felt.
But yelling at his sweet mother would be a sin, and he would never want to hurt her. Instead, he took a deep breath.
“Mamm.” He held up his hand. “Please don’t get your hopes up. I’m just giving Clara and Biena a ride to Emma’s haus. There’s no romance here. Now, I need to get going. We’ll talk later, okay?”
She nodded and sniffed. Was she going to cry? Oh, he could never stand to see her cry. The idea made his heart fracture a little.
He was such a disappointment to his parents, but he couldn’t force himself to be someone he wasn’t.
He forced his lips into a smile. “I’ll see you later, Mamm.”
Before she could respond, he hurried out the back door. Biena and Clara sat on the bench seat in his truck. When he saw his sister was sitting in the middle, disappointment curled through him. He’d hoped Clara would sit next to him.
Stop it! She’s Amish, so don’t waste your time thinking about her!
“Ready?” He climbed into the driver’s seat and brought the rattling engine to life.
“We’ve been ready,” Biena snapped. “You’re the one who took forever to get out here.”
Clara snickered beside her.
“Right.” He steered the truck down the driveway to the main road.
“I was thinking we should work on the last of the strawberries this afternoon,” Biena said as they drove down the road. “Rosalyn told me they’re all ripe now, so we need to get them to the stand as soon as possible.”
“That’s a gut plan.” Clara looked out the front window.
Biena continued. “I hope we have enough of those little plastic baskets.”
His sister’s discussion about strawberries served only as background noise as he drove to Emma’s house. Considering his mother’s words, he couldn’t wipe the image of her hopeful face out of his mind. But no, he wasn’t ready to give up his Englisher life yet. He might never be ready, not even for a beautiful woman like Clara. Besides, was being attracted to her a good reason to join the church?
His heart raced as he contemplated asking Clara on a date. They’d never discussed being more than friends, so how could he even assume she’d be interested in him that way, even if he were Amish? The thought haunted him as he halted the truck by Emma’s barn.
“Hello!” Biena slapped his shoulder. “Are you even listening to me, Jerry?”
“What?” He put the truck in park and turned toward his sister.
She harrumphed as she folded her arms at her waist. “I asked you when you’re going to pick me up.”
“Oh.” Jerry sighed. “What time do you want me to pick you up?”
They settled on a time, and then the women climbed out of the truck.
Biena left, but Clara walked around to the driver’s side door and looked up at him. “You don’t want to stay and help, huh?”
He looked toward the sectioned-off areas of the garden, where groups of young people worked, and he shook his head. “I’d be a liar if I said I enjoyed gardening.”
“You could fix Emma’s leaky kitchen sink along with her toilet that never stops running.”
He looked down at her as she tilted her head and gave him a look of feigned disappointment.
“You don’t want to help an older freind in need?” she asked.
“You’re really gut at guilting people, aren’t you?”
“The best.” Her gorgeous grin was back.
“Fine.” He blew out a sarcastic sigh.
“Yay.” She clapped and took a step back as he climbed out of the truck.
“You always win.” He shut the truck door.
She shrugged. “I do my best.” Then she started toward the house with her grocery bag in hand. She swiveled toward him and waved. “I’ll see you later.”