Dawn Forest happily hummed to herself as she weeded her garden. She and Luca were lucky enough to have found a cute little house just outside San Juan. It was made of cinder blocks, surrounded by a cinder-block wall, and in the front, an iron gate was the only opening. Not the most attractive look, but practical…especially during hurricanes. She sensed someone coming toward her and looked up. When she saw her beloved Luca, she broke into a grin. “Hi, hon!”
“Hi, babe. How’s it going?”
“It’s getting there. The garden was neglected for a long time, and I’m not sure I have a green enough thumb for this. Did you come out to tell me about a new job for us?”
“No new business today. I thought I’d just come out and gaze at my beautiful fiancée.”
Dawn laid down her gardening tools, rose, and slipped her arms around Luca’s waist. “How did I get so lucky?”
“I don’t know. Good karma, I guess.” He grinned.
Before they could kiss, a whirlwind spiraled up right next to them, and Mother Nature appeared.
“Gaia!” Luca instinctively stood between the powerful goddess and Dawn. “What do you want? Are you here to punish me for telling my future wife about my paranormal abilities?”
Dawn put her hands on Luca’s shoulders and peeked around him. “I’d never tell anyone about paranormal abilities. I have my own freaky secrets.”
“Words. Just words,” Gaia said as she crossed her arms. “How do I know you mean them?”
“I know how people react to my psychic abilities,” Dawn said. “I’d never want anyone I love to be feared or mocked for being different.”
Mother Nature nodded. “Good. But that’s not why I’m here. Are you two going to give me a chance to talk?”
“Yes, of course. I’m sorry for babbling,” Luca said.
“I’m here to speak to your wife.”
“Me?” Dawn said.
“You are his wife, right?”
“I will be. We’re getting married in a few weeks.”
“Oh. Time is fairly fluid for me. Congratulations. Now I’d like to speak to you alone.”
Luca kept a protective arm around her. “I don’t want to leave. How do I know she’ll be safe?”
Mother Nature’s jaw dropped. “Of course she’ll be safe! All I do is look out for my children. How could you even ask that?”
“I’m sorry. I’ve just heard rumors you can be…um…tough.”
She waved away the comment. “You shouldn’t listen to rumors. I don’t have to carry out my threats very often.”
“Threats?” Dawn’s eyes widened.
“Nothing to worry about. I’m not threatening either of you. Actually, I have a job offer for you, Dawn.”
“Seriously?”
“No, I came all this way and exposed myself to a human because I’m kidding.”
Luca mumbled under his breath, “I guess the rumors of her sarcasm are true.”
“I heard that, Fierro. Now run along so I can talk to your soon-to-be wife.”
Luca nodded, then kissed Dawn’s cheek and whispered, “Yell if you need me,” subsequently withdrawing into the house.
“Goddess, I’d offer you a place to sit and a cool drink, but I’m afraid I don’t have a bench yet. We were going to build one… A swing, actually.”
Mother Nature snapped her fingers, and a white bench swing appeared beside the flower bed. “Something like this?”
Dawn’s eyes rounded. “Exactly like that.”
Mother Nature smiled, sat on it, and patted the spot next to her. “Consider it a wedding gift.”
Dawn cautiously sat next to the powerful goddess. “Thank you. That’s very generous of you.”
Gaia nodded once. “My pleasure—and not just because you’re named after my favorite time of day. Now, let me get to the heart of the matter. You may have heard I hired a few modern muses. They’ve all been humans, or I should say former humans, since they must become minor goddesses to carry out their duties. Most are married to paranormals.”
“Oh? No, I hadn’t heard.”
Mother Nature smiled. “Good. That means your future sisters-in-law are keeping their mouths shut.”
“My future sisters-in-law? They’re working for you?”
“Some of them, yes. And I’ve hired a couple of women from other families you probably don’t know. There are only six in all. I can’t stress enough how useless my original nine muses are in this modern day and age. That’s why I need new ones.”
Dawn didn’t know if she should say something or just wait and hope Gaia explained what she was getting at. She opted for respectful silence.
“So, getting to the point, I’m here to offer you a job. I know about your psychic ability, and I hear you’re technically adept?”
Dawn considered her answer carefully, wanting to be as honest as possible. “I’d say I’m adept at some technical things but not others. No human being can be good at everything.”
Gaia tipped her head. “I was told you had a technical job back in Boston. Is that not true?”
Dawn sensed she was treading on shaky ground. “Well, yes, I worked on a help desk for ScholarTech. So I guess you could say I know a little about technology and a lot about teaching software.”
Mother Nature looked at the sky and smiled. “Finally. I’ve been looking for someone who can help unravel the mystery of modern technology and actually teach my original muses how they can be more useful to me.”
“And you think I’d be a good teacher?”
Gaia shrugged. “I have no idea, but beggars can’t be choosers. I need someone who’s already aware of the paranormal world, someone who would welcome a little goddess power while using it responsibly, and someone who’s trustworthy and won’t spill the beans about any of this.”
“I—I guess I fit the criteria, but I’m not sure that’s what I want. I’m already very busy.”
Gaia folded her arms and leaned away from her. “Busy gardening? That’s what you call busy?” She waved her arm, and the garden instantly came to life with vibrant color and sweet scents.
“Wow! Thanks. But no, not at all. I have a job, plus Luca and I are setting up a private detective agency, and then I’ll have two jobs. With my psychic powers and Luca’s criminal justice degree and former job as a cop, together we can solve any number of cases. We’re very excited about it, and I wouldn’t want to lose my focus. I’m not sure I could handle three jobs without doing one or more poorly.”
“My modern muses are given a very generous bonus.”
“But I’m already getting a generous bonus from Karma Cleaners.”
Gaia’s brow wrinkled. “Karma Cleaners? What’s that?”
Dawn straightened. “You don’t know? I thought with all the goddesses working there, you’d be well aware of the business.”
Gaia smiled, but Dawn sensed something simmering beneath her calm exterior.
“Tell me about this business.”
“Well, I guess I can. I’m not allowed to tell any human unless they want to have their karma cleaned.”
“Oh? Please continue.”
Dawn knew she had made a mistake but didn’t know how to get out of it. If Gaia doesn’t know about Karma Cleaners, then Karma must not have wanted her to. But now that she knows this much, how can I weasel out of telling her more? She worried her lip and thought about her words carefully.
“Tell me the truth. You won’t get in trouble unless you lie to me…and that includes lying by omission. Don’t try to weasel out of it.”
She must be able to read minds.
“Yes, I can. Now don’t make me search your mind for the information I want. It can be a little painful for you and disgusting for me. A person’s gray matter is slimy and jiggly.”
“Ewww… Okay, I’ll tell you what I know. I don’t know everything, of course. Just what I’ve been taught and experienced firsthand.”
“I understand. Please go on.”
Dawn pushed the swing with her foot before thinking to ask the goddess. “Oh, do you mind if we sway a bit?”
Gaia chuckled. “I’d enjoy it. Go ahead.”
Dawn pushed off with both feet and enjoyed the breeze while moving through the air. “Okay. Here’s what I know. One day, I was desperate to get out of the circumstances I was in. I’d been involved with the local gang in my old neighborhood. I didn’t know how to get out. I was doing everything I could to straighten out my life, but it just wasn’t working. I’d stayed in school and was going to college. As many times as I tried to separate myself from the gang, they kept dragging me back in. They said I was their ‘early warning system’ because of my psychic ability. They used me to alert them to the cops as they made their drug and gun deals.
“I desperately wanted help to get out but had no one to turn to. I tried to get my grandmother to move, but she wouldn’t hear of it. She was raised in that house, and when my mother went to jail, she raised me there. I couldn’t break her heart by telling her I could be following in my mother’s footsteps, so I protected her by pretending that everything was fine. But it wasn’t fine. I hated being used by the gang, but I was powerless to stop them.
“One day, I was really wishing my circumstances were different, out loud. I said something like, ‘Fuck my life. I wish I could start over and pretend to be useless to the gang.’ I began to cry and hug my pillow. Nothing happened right away, but about six months later, I was approached by an old woman. We chatted for a bit, and then she twirled and became a beautiful young woman. She told me they had been watching me since that honest plea for help. It took them a bit of time to respond, because they had to research my past.”
“Who is ‘they’?” Gaia asked.
“Oh. The Karma Cleaners. It’s a group of goddesses and former graduates who are based over an actual dry cleaner.” She chuckled. “My supervisor, Lynda, said their motto is ‘We can get the stains out of your clothes and your soul.’”
“That’s very interesting. Tell me more,” Gaia said.
Dawn bit her lip and hesitated. Gaia just lifted one eyebrow. “Okay. Here’s the rest. I’m a graduate of the program. I worked in a community youth center and helped kids avoid getting into gangs, quitting school, dealing drugs, and all the other dangers kids living in the inner city face.”
Gaia gave her a slight smile, then schooled her features. “That’s good. It seems like you managed to turn your life around. Did Karma Cleaners do that for you?”
“They just guided me so I could change my own karma. My actions after that naturally improved my karma, and good things began to happen.” She gazed at the back door of her rented home. “One of the best things to happen to me was Luca. I went from avoiding the cops to working with them. I helped find and rescue a missing four-year-old girl. It was dangerous, but I didn’t hesitate. My karma was officially clean after that. As a graduate, they offered me a position like Lynda’s. Finding people with rotten karma who really, really want to change.”
“And what do you do when you find them?”
“Well, nothing at first. I spot people I think might be candidates and recommend them to the main office. Then they do the watching and researching and get back to me if they feel I should intervene.”
“I see. How do you spot them?”
“Oh, that’s easy now that I’m a psychic detective. We get people looking for help all the time. I can see out of their mind’s eye, get flashes of their future, and read their aura. I know if they genuinely want help or have other agendas.”
“Interesting. Well, thank you so much for your time, Dawn. I’ll let you think about my offer. I could really use your help—even temporarily.”
Dawn smiled her relief, thanked Gaia again for the swing, and was ready to bid the powerful goddess a warm and sincere farewell when a question only the goddess could answer occurred to her.
“Mother Nature, may I ask you a question?”
“Sure.”
“Why did you let a hurricane devastate Puerto Rico?”
“Oh. That. Yeah… Did you hear about the giant earthquake that dropped half of California into the Pacific Ocean at the same time?”
Dawn’s jaw dropped. “No! How could I not have heard about that?”
Gaia smirked. “Precisely. I was a little busy holding together tectonic plates that day. As soon as I was free, I grabbed hold of the tail of that hurricane and unwound it. You and the rest of the western Caribbean are welcome.”
* * *
“Karma?” Gaia bellowed into the ether.
Karma appeared out of the mist and strolled up to her sister. “No need to holler. Are you looking for me?”
“Damn right I am. Sit your ass down and tell me all about this Karma Cleaners agency of yours.”
Karma shrugged. “Okay, but why don’t we find a nice spot in the French countryside and have a couple glasses of champagne?”
“That sounds good. Wait! Are you just trying to relax me so I won’t be mad at you?”
“I figured it couldn’t hurt.”
“I’ve heard of this champagne, but isn’t it used for celebrations? We are definitely not celebrating!”
“Do you mean to tell me you’ve never had champagne?”
“No, I haven’t.”
“Well, we must remedy this situation immediately.” Karma snapped her fingers, and they were sitting at a sidewalk café in Paris. A waiter appeared. “Garçon, we’d like two glasses of your best champagne, please.”
“Oui, madam.” He walked briskly into the restaurant.
“Nice one, Karma. You said French countryside. Now here we are in a densely populated city where I can’t shout at you without causing a scene.”
“Oh, is that what I did?” Karma smirked, and Gaia’s eyes narrowed as she stared down her sister.
At last, Karma sighed and snapped her fingers again, and they sat in a field of lavender. She opened a picnic basket and withdrew a bottle of champagne and one crystal flute, which she handed to Gaia.
“Nice try again, Sister. You and I both know that lavender has a relaxing effect. Why do you think I invented it?”
“Because people need to relax.” A loud pop exploded as she released the cork from the bottle and Gaia jumped. “And so do you, especially if we’re going to have any kind of polite discussion.”
“Polite? Was it polite to completely shut me out of this little business of yours? And which goddesses are you employing? And how many humans know about this?”
Karma filled Gaia’s crystal glass to the rim.
The powerful goddess took a tentative sip. Then another. “Mmm… This is an interesting beverage. I like the little bubbles tickling my nose.”
Karma smiled. “I knew you’d like it.”
“Aren’t you having any?”
“I will. You enjoy yours first.”
“I think I will.” Mother Nature took a big gulp the next time the goblet met her lips and the next. She giggled.
“Yummy, isn’t it?”
“It really is. There’s a touch of sweetness but not too much.” After another big gulp, Gaia drained the glass.
“Have another. This time, I’ll join you.” Karma watched her sister place one hand on the ground behind her and recline slightly, holding out her glass for more of the potent wine. As soon as she’d refilled Gaia’s glass, she began her sales pitch.
“I didn’t think you’d want to be bothered with my little enterprise, dear Sister. After all, you have enough to do.”
“Ain’t that the truth.”
“I know, right? So when the goddesses were complaining they were bored just sitting around playing harps all day, I thought ‘What would Gaia do?’ Then it occurred to me that I’d seen good parents deal with this. The most effective strategy was to put them to work! The kids either welcomed the task or complained but did it anyway. The chores got done, and they didn’t complain about being bored anymore.”
Gaia sipped her champagne quietly. Some of what Karma said made sense. She hadn’t seen her goddesses for quite a while, and that was just fine with her. She had enough on her hands trying to keep track of her modern muses. Former humans with minor goddess status required frequent monitoring. And the gods! Holy moly, they were always trouble.
“I’m still miffed you didn’t share this with me. A human had to tell me about this enterprise. A human!”
“Ah. So you were discussing the paranormal world with a human?”
“I was offering her a job as a modern muse. She wouldn’t have been human much longer.”
“Wouldn’t have been? Do you mean she didn’t accept the job?”
“She will. She’s just too busy at the moment, she said. Too busy setting up her new psychic detective business with her paranormal husband—and too busy working for you!”
“Ah. You must mean Dawn. She’s one of our stellar graduates. Imagine if we hadn’t helped her get out of that gang? She would have wound up in jail, just like her mother. And she never would have found that little girl.”
“Granted, it sounds like a worthy cause, but really, what if the human fails? What if they tell every degenerate they know about you and your enterprise?”
“First, they know we’re watching their progress. We’ll know if they’re backsliding. Plus they have regular check-ins with their karma officer.”
“Karma officer? What are they? The karma police?”
“More like probation officers.”
“Hmm… And this works?”
Karma smiled in earnest. “It works beautifully.”
“Well, stop it!”
“Excuse me?”
“You heard me. I never sanctioned this. Any new activity by my gods, goddesses, and muses needs to go through me.”
“That’s insane.”
“It is not. I’m setting boundaries.”
“Even when those boundaries are stupid?”
“Who are you calling stupid?” Gaia snapped.
“I didn’t call you stupid. I called your decision stupid. That isn’t personal.” Karma rose and placed her hands on her hips. “Now, if you want to get personal, Sister, you are not only a bitch but an impulsive control freak who lacks trust in anyone else. You even expect failure! What kind of mother is that?”
Gaia was taken aback. Tipping her nose in the air, she rose several feet in the air. “Well, thank you for your input. I need to go somewhere to be alone.” She disappeared in a whirlwind, and a sudden rainstorm bombarded the field of lavender.
* * *
“I’m sorry, Karma. Did I get you in trouble?” Dawn asked. The two of them sat at her small kitchen table, sipping coffee.
“No more than usual. Don’t worry. I can handle her. I’ve been doing this job ever since the first caveman screwed up.”
Dawn grinned. “Really? How did—you know what? Never mind. I have a more important question to ask you.”
Karma tipped her head. “Please, go ahead.”
“Mother Nature wanted me to do something for her. I said I was too busy. Should I have said yes? Do you think that’s why she got so mad?”
Karma took a deep breath and let it out slowly before she spoke. “It’s hard to say why she does anything. But if you’re truly too busy, you were right to say no.”
Dawn’s brow wrinkled, and she remained quiet.
“You’re not the first one to turn her down, you know.”
“I’m not?”
“Nope. In fact, I could introduce you to the brave woman if you like.”
“Yes. I’d really like that.”
“Now, you should know she eventually changed her mind…but you don’t have to.”
“You mean she became a modern muse after all? Why? What changed her mind?”
“I’ll let her answer that.” Karma tipped her face up to the ceiling. “Bliss? Karma to Bliss. Can you pop in for a moment?”
A pretty brunette appeared. She glanced at the table and snapped her fingers. Suddenly, the kitchen table expanded, and an extra chair appeared. “Hi, Karma. And who might this lovely young woman be?”
“Bliss Cameron, meet Dawn Forest, soon to be Dawn Fierro.”
Bliss’s eyes rounded. “Of the legendary Boston firefighting Fierros?”
Dawn smiled. “Well, yes and no. My future husband, Luca, became a cop.”
Bliss chuckled. “Oh yeah. I heard about that. It must have caused quite the stir in a family of firefighters.”
Dawn rolled her eyes. “You could say that. They called him the blue sheep. He’s a PI now though.”
“Nice. My husband, Drake, is a firefighter. He worked with Jayce Fierro for a while. But that’s not why you called me, is it?”
“No. Karma said you had originally turned down Mother Nature when she wanted you to become one of her modern muses. Did she retaliate?”
“Who, Gaia? Not at all. She would never do that. She needs us too much.”
“But if she needs me and I said no…”
“Don’t worry about it.” Bliss snapped her fingers, and a cup of coffee materialized in front of her. “I said no for a very good reason. She wanted me to become the muse of the internet.”
Dawn’s jaw dropped. “The whole internet?”
Bliss chuckled. “Yeah. I’d have lost my mind. We eventually compromised. I’m the muse of email. It’s fairly easy. I just lean over a potential dum-dum’s shoulder and whisper, ‘You might not want to send that.’ Or ‘Just save it in your drafts folder and think about it for a while.’ If Gaia’s asking you to do something that’s too much, say no and stick to your guns.”
Dawn scratched her head. “It’s not unreasonable. It’s just that I already have a job, and my fiancé and I are trying to grow his PI business, and now Gaia wants me to teach the original nine muses how to use technology.”
Bliss groaned. “Good luck with that. They’re not known for their left-brain skills. They handle the arts, mostly—all right-brain stuff. That’s why Gaia’s hiring.”
Dawn turned to Karma. “What do you think? Is it worth it to try? I also have my job with…well, you know.”
Karma shrugged. “It sounds temporary. I can give you a leave of absence until you’re ready to come back.”
Dawn glanced between Karma and Bliss.
“It’s okay. Bliss knows,” Karma said.
“Whew! I didn’t want to spill the beans again.” Dawn wiped invisible perspiration off her forehead.
Karma chuckled. “And I appreciate that.”
Bliss rose. “I think I’ve given you all the guidance I can. If you don’t need me for anything else, I sense an idiot about to commit career suicide with a scathing email. You can call me if you need me.”
“Thank you. It was nice meeting you.” Dawn shook her hand.
“Likewise.” Bliss grabbed her coffee mug, returned the table to normal size, and disappeared.
“Well, you have a lot to think about. I need to leave too,” Karma said.
Dawn nodded. “I’m grateful for your help. I’ll think about that leave of absence.”
“Anytime.” And with that, Karma vanished.