I sprang to my feet and rushed across to him. I turned him around so he was on his back. His head flopped to the side. Bare-chested, and with a bloody wound on the left side of his neck, he was barely conscious, his life force depleted.
“I can understand why you like him. His blood is rather delicious,” Mortissa said.
“What’s he doing here?” I shouted.
“I think you know.”
I looked up and saw the terrible truth in her eyes. “No. I already proved myself to you. Val is dead.”
“You must do this, Alessandra. You know it yourself. This is the opportunity you have been waiting for. Weakness has leaked into your life, softening your nature. It’s time to redeem yourself, to be reborn into your true self.” She clenched one hand into a fist. “And together we’ll be able to forge an alliance of strength, go forward and take whatever we want from the world.”
I looked down at Lionel, watching as his glazed eyes focused. I saw a spark of recognition, and he smiled.
“Don’t smile,” I whispered. “I’m not here to save you.” The opposite.
He opened his mouth and coughed. Blood bubbled between his lips. “Come closer,” he whispered.
I leaned down toward him. The smell of his blood was strong, but beneath it was his own scent, warm and earthy.
“I’m sorry I reacted so badly before,” he said. “I understand why you had to lie to me.”
“You didn’t do anything wrong,” I whispered. My gums tingled, but I didn’t let myself transform. Not yet.
“I did. I fell in love with you. Then I let the discovery of one small aspect of you color everything I felt.”
“You didn’t fall in love. We only just met. We barely know each other.” And being a vampire wasn’t a small aspect.
“Maybe you are right. Maybe I’m not in love. But I’ve never felt anything like this before. So I want to take the leap of believing it’s real, believing it’s love.” He reached up and briefly gripped my wrist. “Take a leap with me.”
“I don’t love you.”
“Before love, you have to lower your defenses. And before that, you have to believe in yourself. Take that leap, at least.”
The lack of blood had gone to his head. “You realize you aren’t getting out of here.”
He closed his eyes and swallowed. “Not all deaths are the same. When I thought we were going to die under the building, I was glad I was with someone, with you. And if I die now, I want it to be with love in my heart.”
“That’s stupid,” I said.
“What’s he saying?” Mortissa sat on her throne with her sword lying across her knees, her fingertips brushing along the surface of the blade.
“He’s saying he loves me,” I told her.
“An extra special treat for you, then, little dove. Draining the life force of someone who loves you tastes extra sweet.”
Mortissa would kill both of us if I didn’t kill him. Even if I hadn’t already made the decision to return to my previous life by giving up the folly of shedding my vampire skin, I would be left with no choice. Either both of us died or just him.
“You had me wrong,” I whispered to Lionel. “I was lying to you. Lying to myself as well, in believing I could change and be someone I’m not."
“You are a good person, Essa. Take the leap and believe that.”
The words warmed my heart, but I crushed the feeling within myself. “You are delusional. Essa isn’t even my name.”
In response, he gave me a warm smile.
Damn him. “Get angry at me,” I hissed. “I wormed my way into your trust. I lied about my nature. I’m about to murder you, drain your blood, drain your very life until you are nothing more than a husk. I deserve rage and revulsion. Not that weak half smile.”
“I understand what you have to do and why,” he said. “I’m ready.”
“Why the delay, little dove?” Mortissa asked. “You have no doubts, I hope.”
I leaned closer. It was painful seeing his battered face with an expression full of kindness, so I turned away, concentrating on his neck. A crusted red smudge pulled my mouth downward. The smell of his blood grew stronger, and bloodlust took me. My fangs sprouted, and the skin of my face tightened.
I wanted to have him so much, take every part of him. It had been so long. I knew how wonderful he would taste.
A single gulp, and I would never doubt my true nature again. Mortissa was right that I needed to test myself. By proving myself, I would be reforged into a stronger metal.
Lionel had even given me permission; he understood what I was, he knew what I had to do. “I’m sorry,” I breathed.
“I forgive you,” he whispered back.
My lips touched the skin of his neck. The taste of blood exploded inside me, and I moaned. I opened my mouth, preparing to bite down, the tips of my fangs touching his skin.
This was it. There would be no stopping once I started. I would drink until the whole of Lionel’s life force was part of me, until I had killed him and purged myself of all weakness. All I needed was the tiniest more pressure to penetrate the skin.
Instead, I pulled away. The smell of blood was still in my nostrils, but I didn’t let it cloud my mind. I ran my fingertips along Lionel’s cheek, and I remembered being clasped against him in the rubble of Val’s basement, breathing in the same scent, each of us feeling the body heat of the other. When we’d been separated, my arm had felt strange for no longer being curled around his back.
My fangs retracted, and the tightness left my face as the bloodlust evaporated. We smiled at each other and a warmth filled me. I leaned down and kissed him, a pure kiss, lips on lips. It tasted sweet. Not the same sweet taste of blood, but something better, more wholesome.
“That’s disappointing,” Mortissa said, picking up her broadsword and standing. “At least it’s better to know.”
I stood in front of Lionel.
“After everything we’ve been through, all these years, you’ve chosen a pathetic bloodbag over me.”
“Yes.” I drew my katana.
Mortissa smiled. “So what now? You are going to try to kill me? Really, dear? You know you aren’t my equal.”
I charged forward and swung at her left side, a testing blow, aiming to feel her out.
I didn’t expect my sword to sink home, but it did. Mortissa didn’t even try to block or dodge, simply answering my attack with one of her own. She used the brief split second when my blade was caught inside her flesh to swing her broadsword viciously at my left side.
I screamed and backed away, clutching at the wound.
“I’m sorry, did you want to dance, little dove?” Mortissa chuckled. “All I have for you today is butchery. She dashed forward, hacking at me with long, heavy strokes. I blocked each attack, but with Mortissa’s full strength behind each blow, my elbows bent a little more each time. I couldn’t match Mortissa’s strength even at my peak, and with blood leaking from the heavy wound in my side, I wasn’t close to that. And with Mortissa happy to absorb my blows just to get her own strike home, I didn’t dare counterattack.
Mortissa drove me back until I could retreat no further. I ducked a high blow, and Mortissa’s broadsword clanged against the wall. I spun, then dashed to the other end of the room.
Mortissa turned. “I often allow myself to be injured.” Blood leaked from the gash in her side, but it barely affected her movements. “Just to know that I rule over my body. Pain is just a trick of the mind. Regular injuries also ensure that my healing powers are perfect.”
She swept across the room in a flash. I dashed away, but it wasn’t me she was going for—it was Lionel. She grabbed him by the neck and lifted him up. “Healing is even quicker when I get renewed by a shot of life force.”
Lionel’s legs dangled above the floor, but he managed to summon the energy to punch her in the face.
Mortissa just smiled. “Still spirit left in him,” she said. “His life force will have juice.” She crashed an elbow into his jaw, causing his head to snap backward.
“Leave him alone.” I charged, using my speed to be upon Mortissa in an instant. She was ready, discarding Lionel behind her and spinning away from me, but not before she managed a vicious cut in my lower right side.
Agony tore through me; I could barely stand. Shifting dizzily from side to side, I glanced behind to check on Lionel. He was still conscious.
“So it isn’t just he who has fallen for you,” Mortissa said. “You love him too. How Shakespearean! When you are both dead, I’ll have to have one of the fawns write a poem.”
My stomach was slick with blood, and my pants were becoming soaked. I touched my free hand to my side to stem the spurting. Hot pain lanced into my core, and I staggered and almost collapsed backward.
“It’s okay. Fall on top of him,” Mortissa said. “Wrap your arms around him. I’ll skewer the two of you together with a single thrust. Let no one say I’m not romantic.”
“I don’t want to die like this.” It had been the same thing I’d said trapped in Val’s basement. I was willing to die, but I needed to accomplish something first.
“How do you wish to die, little dove?” Mortissa asked. “Due to our long history together, requests will be accepted, within reason.”
“I wish die with another, so we may take our last breath together.”
“Lie down next to him, and I’ll make it happen,” Mortissa said.
“Him?” Drawing on a strength I didn’t know I possessed, I straightened my back and raised my katana. “No, I wish that you and I take our last breath together, little dove.”
Mortissa snarled and flew at me, sending her broadsword plunging toward my heart. I didn’t try to escape, just shifted slightly to the side, allowing the sword to sink home. The blade went all the way through, the point of it coming out my back. I screamed an unholy scream, but didn’t let the pain stop my counterstroke. I took careful aim, and thrust my katana straight into Mortissa’s heart.
She staggered backward, and both our swords came free of each other’s bodies. Mortissa eyes were wide and glaring, and for a moment, I thought I had missed the heart. Then she keeled over dead.
My katana fell from my fingers, and I pressed my hands against my right breast. Both hands weren’t enough to stop the bleeding, and I fell into a pool of my own blood.
My mind floated in a sea of pain, but I accepted it serenely. After a life of horror, I had finally gained a sliver of redemption by killing Mortissa and saving Lionel.
I had tried to change, but there was no changing for someone like me, just an ending.
I let the blackness take me.