CHAPTER Two

 

Sarah came home at six-thirty after a lecture by her favorite literature professor. She was surprised to find her mother in deep talk with Mrs. Tallart and her son, Aymeric.

“Oh. Hello Mrs. Tallart, Aymeric.”

Aymeric looked at her with raised eyebrows. He was in the same mess she was, being dragged here by his mother, at twenty-three what’s more. That had to hurt a little bit.

“Hello, honey. I was wondering when you would be back. You’re just in time. You can go freshen up and have dinner with us. It’ll be ready in about twenty minutes.”

“Oh, well, um.”

“I made your favorite, salmon penne. Plus, Aymeric and his mother have come all the way from Pacific Palisades, honey. Emily and I are going to be engrossed in discussing our next fundraising endeavor, and I’m sure Aymeric would appreciate your company.”

As upset as she was with her mother, there was something disarming in the way she talked, and her smile always killed it, as Sarah used to say. Things sounded simple just the way she said them. Her goals were obvious, but it was still hard to be mad or to actually get angry at her, and especially harder to say no.

“All right. Give me a few minutes and I’ll come back downstairs.” With a polite nod she walked upstairs and into her room. Now, out of her mother’s hypnotic gaze, she was pissed.

“God damn it,” she said as she put down her tote bag on her bed. “I’m twenty-one for crying out loud. How come I always feel nine when she takes that tone?” She couldn’t help saying aloud while getting rid of her clothes.

Stepping into her private bathroom, she wondered why she couldn’t step up to her mother and tell her to stop doing this. To just stop.

I’ve got to get out of this house, she told herself. She looked back at her purse as an image of Leticia Rodriguez, the girl she had met the week before, flashed before her eyes, not that it was the first time. She had definitely made an impression. Sarah shook her head. Of course she would make an impression; Sarah thought Letty and her friend were gang members when she first saw them.

But she knew it wasn’t that, or it wasn’t all. The few times Letty’s face had popped up in her mind during that week, it wasn’t the tough, bitch-scaring look that appeared; it was the woman, sitting and talking to her. It was her words as well as the gazes that passed between them, the way Letty looked at her…

No way, Sarah told herself. Yes, that apartment sounded great but the whole thing was a bad idea. She was just pissed because of her mother and tonight’s trap. She would bide her time and settle somewhere, later, when she would find the right place, somewhere safe…She just wanted to be quiet and study. Letty was a bad idea, she could feel it.

After dinner, Fredrick headed to his study. The three women and Aymeric headed to the living room. Annie and Emily Tallart, indeed, became engrossed in their fundraiser for the reparations needed for the church’s rooftop, so after a quick stroll in the garden, Sarah brought Aymeric upstairs, telling him they could watch TV there in the meantime.

“I’m really sorry about this, it’s humiliating,” he told her while scrutinizing Sarah’s room.

Sarah felt a bit uncomfortable now. She wasn’t used to bringing boys to her room. She wanted to laugh at herself. Twenty-one, Sarah, remember? She joked at herself. Now that she thought about it, Aymeric was the only boy who had been here when they were teens, only two or three times though.

“Tell me about it.” She sighed as she sat on her bed.

She shifted when Aymeric sat closely beside her, their thighs touching.

“So, what do you want to watch?” She said as she took the remote and turned the TV on.

Aymeric kept his gaze on her. She saw his eyes drop to her lips, so she stared at the TV in front of her.

“So, how’s your girlfriend?”

“You mean Hayley?”

“Well, yes. The girl you told me about, last time our mothers set us up,” she said with a tense smile at his gaze, now lingering on her cleavage.

“She’s fine. She’s not actually my girlfriend, though.”

“Oh. But I thought you said that was why your mother insisted you come here, because she didn’t like your girlfriend.”

“My mom doesn’t like any of the girls I bring home, whether they’re girlfriends or just friends who happen to be girls.”

“Okay. So, Hayley, just a friend then?”

“We fooled around once or twice, probably more to piss off my mom than anything else. She’s not really my style,” he said, licking his lips as he stared at Sarah’s blue eyes, then down at her cleavage again, for a brief moment. Sarah swallowed.

“But it was fun,” he said, putting his hand on Sarah’s thigh. “It’s always fun, don’t you think?” He added while moving it up on her thigh. Sarah stopped the hand before it went a little too close to her crotch.

“What are you doing?”

“I thought it was obvious. I mean, you brought me to your room.”

Sarah frowned. “To watch TV.”

He laughed before realizing she wasn’t joking. “Seriously? Come on, it’d be a lot more fun to pass time this way,” he said, placing his hand on her face while leaning in closer, but she moved her face away before he could kiss her.

“What’s wrong, Sarah? It’s not like we never fooled around before, in this very room.”

“We were teenagers and supposedly dating, and I don’t care what you may have told your buddies at the time, but we never went past second base.”

“I know, chill. And that’s why I was hoping we could push things up to third. We’re not teens anymore.” He pulled away as she was still on the fence. “Come on, obviously our mothers will keep on bringing us together, so why not make the best of it while we’re at it. You’re hot, I’m hot, it’d be super hot between us,” he said with a playful wink.

He made it sound so simple. Sarah looked at his hand on her thigh. He rubbed his thumb on the inside of her thigh.

“It’s okay, Sarah.”

“I just…don’t do these things, this way. I mean, I’m not used—”

He stopped her stammering by kissing her. She let him. His other hand immediately moved up, briefly to her waist before it settled on her breast, but she pulled away.

“Come on, Sarah. You’re in college, now’s the time to explore things, live a little, have fun, be free, you know. You’re not gonna do stuff like that when you’re forty.”

He pulled her face into another kiss and meant to lean her backward on the bed, but she pushed him away and stood away from the bed and him.

“No. I don’t want to. Okay?”

“Chill,” he said as he got up, hands in the air. “I’m not gonna force you or anything. Just thought you were teasing a little, but no worries.” He headed to the door. “If you want to stay here and watch TV, that’s fine by me. We can also play cards while we’re at it. Bet you play Scattergories, don’t you?” Sarah swallowed at the tone of his voice. “Have fun then and when you’re ready for strip poker, or any other grown-up activity, you give me a call.”

He walked out of the room and she sat on the bed. She took her head in between her hands and took deep breaths.

She had done nothing wrong, she repeated herself. Just because she wouldn’t put out simply for the fun of it, did not mean something was wrong with her. Even if the thought of it was getting scarier as the years went by, it still didn’t mean something was wrong with her.

“Not at all,” she said as she stood proudly, but she deflated as she walked to stare by the window at the empty garden. She sighed.

I have to get out of here. She couldn’t take this—or her mother’s matchmaking attempts—any longer.

Sarah looked at her purse and took her cell phone out. She searched for Letty’s numbers and stood a while in the middle of the room, her thumb on the call button but not pressing on it.

She sighed. She was being ridiculous; she could at least check this apartment, right? She was a grown up, no matter what Aymeric thought, and there were no reasons why she couldn’t share it with someone like Letty. What was she afraid of after all?

“That’s right. Nothing,” she said as she placed the call.

She had no idea why, but her heartbeat sped up as the dial tone filled her ears.

“Um, Letty, hi. This is Sarah Weisman. We met the other d—oh you do. Cool. Um, actually I was calling about this apartment, but it’s probably already rent–it isn’t? Oh okay, um good, I guess. Um, yes, I’d like that, I mean, to check it out, just like that. Okay so whenever‒oh, Saturday? Um, Saturday…” Sarah was actually trying hard to find any reason why she couldn’t go visit the apartment on Saturday. She felt literally freaked out at the idea of meeting Letty at the apartment. “Oh, well, okay then. If I can. Yes. Okay, bye. Maybe I’ll see you Saturday, if I can free myself, of course.”

Sarah hung up and exhaled loudly. She had absolutely nothing planned on Saturday but reading and studying, as usual. Letty had cleverly said that she would visit it and that, if Sarah was free and happened to be around, she could come check it out too with her. Sarah took a deep breath; this gave her three more days to prepare herself, and mostly to wonder why she needed preparation in the first place. Something about Letty unsettled her.

“Crap,” she said as she sat on the bed, staring at the phone in her hand.

She didn’t want to have to move away again, like she had when she had left LA in the first place, and like she had once again when she’d left Northwestern. She couldn’t keep on leaving as soon as…

As soon as what? She asked herself. She ran her hands through her hair and took her head in her hands. She wasn’t ready to think about it, because there was nothing to think about. She would be fine. If she were to share an apartment with Letty, they would barely see each other. Sarah was always on campus or studying. Letty’s store was all the way up in the valley. She would spend her time in the store or in the traffic. Perfect, they wouldn’t see much of each other. She could do that and keep her quiet and uneventful life back, just how she wanted it.

 

***

 

“Who was that?”

Letty gave a jump at Ricky’s words as he came up behind her. She put her cell phone back in her pocket.

“Oh. Um, nothing. I mean it was her.”

“Weisman’s daughter?”

“Yes. Sarah.”

“Great. I was beginning to doubt your skills.”

Letty’s smile strangely didn’t reach her lips.

“So?”

“Um, we’re gonna visit the apartment on Saturday.”

“What apartment? Oh, you mean the one you told her about? You were really serious about that?”

“Well, I am now. I can’t stay in the room upstairs forever, you know that. Besides, we do need it for storage. I told you I was looking for a place anyway.”

“Yeah, but not on that side of town.”

“Traffic’s gonna suck, yeah. But the apartment looked really great for such a great price. Two of us, we should be good.”

“Are you sure this is a good idea? Don’t you think it’s a bit risky?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, seeing her every day, pretending and all, it could get difficult for you to do your thing. Plus, I hate to say it but she’s hot…And I’ve seen the way you were just staring at your phone right now. Imagine a party heats up, alcohol flows high, and she throws herself at you, what you’re gonna do, then?”

“That’s an unlikely scenario. Besides, she doesn’t seem like the party type of girl.”

“You’ve barely met her.”

“Come on, you’ve seen her, head’s in her books all day long. There won’t be any problems, and we’ll become friends more easily.”

“Yeah, maybe you’re right. The sooner, the better. And then you can move out or kick her out any day.”

“Most likely I’ll tell her Phil and Sally broke up, and Sally needs her friend for comfort and a roommate for the rent. Plus, their apartment is three blocks from the store, it would make a lot more sense,” she stated before returning to labeling the new arrivals at the store.

Ricky grinned. “You really have thought of everything. You’re brilliant.” He poked her shoulder playfully and left her.

“Yeah, brilliant,” she said in a low voice.

She could keep a straight face with Ricky but admittedly, she wondered about this too. She was a bit anxious at the idea of seeing Sarah again. She had a plan, something to do but felt like she was already improvising. She was unsure if this was the way to go. Sarah had left her perplexed. True, she hadn’t talked to her for very long, but she hadn’t appeared as Letty had pictured her.

And yes, she was hot: those blue eyes, that pale, fair skin over that slender body… Letty stopped what she was doing and bit the corner of her lower lip. Maybe she should call her back and cancel, say the apartment is already rented unfortunately?

“Chicken,” she whispered to herself.

Instead she placed the call to her friend at the agency to make sure she could visit it on Saturday.

It was set. She hoped Sarah would show. No, she knew Sarah would show. And there she was, nervous again. Still three days to get her best game on.

 

***

 

Letty met Sarah at the corner of Veteran and Montana Avenue. They walked quietly for a minute along Montana Avenue’s nice houses.

“I’m glad you called and decided to come,” Letty said, finally breaking the unexpected awkwardness.

“Well, UCLA is so close. I was around, so I said why not?”

“Of course, but um,” Letty said as she frowned all of a sudden. “It’s Saturday.”

“Oh, um.” Sarah blushed unwittingly before saying. “I go there, to study some, you know. Big library and all. Besides, there are courses on Saturdays.”

“Okay.” Letty couldn’t help a smile while Sarah shook her head at herself. Why did she need to justify her presence this way? If she wanted to see the apartment, there was nothing wrong with that. Why did Letty’s presence make her so nervous? Besides, she often did go to Powell Library on weekends, for pleasure and now as a student job. As a senior she didn’t have many classes. She spent more time weekly researching and studying as well as reading in the library than in class—or at home.

“You’re very studious, aren’t you?”

“Well, I really like my classes. I do spend a lot of time at Powell Library.”

“What about college parties and sororities and other typical college life?”

“Those are movie myths, Sarah said with a smile. “There are actually more people studying in universities, than wild-partying and other movie stuff.”

“Are you really sure about that? Damn, I’m disappointed.”

“So, you’re a party girl?” Sarah said with a hint of a tease in her voice.

“Not really,” Letty admitted.

“Good. I mean. Me neither.”

Letty smiled. Sarah looked in front of her, then to the side of the pavement when Letty stood in front of the first of several condominiums. They were only three stories high. Sarah had been surprised when Letty first gave her the address, because she could only think of houses in that side of Montana.

Sarah smiled; the building was cute, and the yellowish colors were very welcoming. Even though she counted three condominiums, it definitely fit with the surroundings. She tried to hold back a grin. She liked it before seeing the inside. That was a bad sign. A part of her hoped that she would hate the inside…And another part of her was getting very excited to get inside.

“What floor?”

“Third. After you,” Letty said, opening the door for Sarah.

Letty couldn’t help glancing at Sarah’s buttocks, very tempting in the tight, navy blue jeans Sarah was wearing. She wore a large see-through white shirt with a black top underneath and brown faux leather boots. Letty looked away with a shake of the head.

She opened the apartment with the key she had retrieved at the agency. They took just a step inside to take in their first view and impression of the apartment. Sarah looked right while Letty looked left, then both of them looked in front at the relatively large window in the wall opposite the entrance door. The room was well lit by the natural light.

They stepped in at the same time from the very small entryway. They looked to their left to take in the open kitchen. Granted it was small, but it was just what they needed, especially at such an affordable price. The apartment was specified to be 868 square feet, of which two-thirds were the living room and kitchen. The two bedrooms were medium-sized, one was a tad smaller than the other. The bathroom was medium sized as well.

Letty ran her hand along the kitchen counter as they stepped in deeper. Sarah looked around. Letty watched her, trying to decipher the look on her face. She smiled when she recognized appreciation. She felt as if she knew what Sarah was thinking. It was very strange, but she had the deepest feeling that Sarah was picturing the whole apartment furnished, decorated at their taste, like a home. She was imagining herself in, and it seemed to work.

Sarah walked to the window then followed Letty as the brunette headed toward the bedroom on the right. She opened the door and they stepped in.

They looked around quietly.

Letty said. “This must be the bigger of the two. Okay, it’s not huge but I think if you arrange it properly, you’ll be good. See, the wall cupboards waste no room.”

Sarah looked at her with raised eyebrows. “Why would I get the big room?”

“You’ll need it more than me. I’ll only just sleep in here. Between the store, the band rehearsal, and the time in traffic, I won’t be around much. You’ll have the place for yourself more than often.”

“You’re really selling me the place, aren’t you?”

Sarah’s heart skipped a bit at the lopsided grin on Letty’s face.

“Come on, Sarah. I know you like it.”

Sarah shrugged. “It’s…okay,” she said before leaving the room to go see the other room on the left. Letty kept her smile on as she followed.

“Even if I liked it, we’d have to draw straws to choose rooms.”

“As you wish but really, I’m offering. You can have your friends over and study and all; you’d have more room.”

“I don’t have…” Sarah stopped herself, in Letty’s gaze she could see the interest she had just sparked in her. “What about you? Your friends from the store and the band and, I don’t know, maybe Ricky and other guests. I mean, you probably have a girlfriend and him too, so you need to have room for, um—”

“A foursome?”

Sarah put her hands on her hips with a scolding pout and Letty chuckled.

“Come on, the way you were saying it, Sarah? And what about your boytoys anyway?”

“Boytoys, really?”

Letty kept on laughing and Sarah couldn’t help chuckling.

“No but seriously, Sarah. The rooms are almost the same size, look,” she said as she opened the door. “You can barely see the difference. I like this one. And I think you’d be good in the other one, plus you’d have the bathroom closer to you. I’m offering— take it.”

“Why? I mean, why would you do that?” Sarah wanted to ask why she would even ask someone she barely knew to share an apartment with her, but she didn’t.

Letty shrugged. “Because honestly,” she said as she stepped away and into the would-be living room. “All I care about is that there is a minimum space for me to cook my stuff and a TV,” she said as she drew a square in the air with her hands outlining a TV.

Sarah chuckled at the childish tone of Letty’s voice. She moved closer.

“No, no, the TV would go there, see,” she pointed close to the window. “Otherwise you won’t see a thing with the sun through the window. Besides, if we put it here, we can put a couch there, a coffee table right in front of the couch and we can still walk on both sides. It’s not that small, or at least, this way the place will look bigger.”

They stared at each other then. Sarah bit her lips. It was obvious she liked the apartment, but the most disturbing thing was that it felt as if she and Letty had been friends for a long time, when they barely knew each other. Yet they seemed very in sync and comfortable around each other. This was unsettling because Sarah felt both at ease and unnerved by the brunette’s presence.

Sarah cleared her throat. “I mean, obviously you’d do whichever way you want. About the TV, I mean. Cause I don’t watch TV. I mean I have a TV in my room. At my parents’, I mean, but I don’t watch it. Often.” Sarah took a deep breath after her stammering speech.

It seemed to her as if Letty was breathing against her skin.

“No, no. It’ll be perfect this way. I like the way you think,” she said with a wink before moving an inch away.

Danger, danger, Sarah told herself.

“What do you say? You in?”

Sarah opened her mouth, but no sounds came out. She wanted to take it. Red flags seemed to pop up everywhere in her mind, but for once she wasn’t already running away. That had to mean something, right? All she could think, though, was that she should run away.

“Let me just think about it for a few days. I mean—”

“Sure, no problem. Listen, I’ll tell my friend at the agency to hold it for us until Wednesday. That place is gonna be gone the minute it’s on the market, you know that, right?”

“Yes, yes I do. I promise to give you an answer before that, okay?”

“Perfect.”

Another lingering gaze between them and Sarah walked away toward the bathroom, to keep inspecting the place; it was better than being sucked into Letty’s deep dark stare. They stayed a little while longer, both checking the place out on their own before walking out. They were silent before Sarah tentatively waved.

“I should go, the bus is going to be here.”

“Sorry I can’t drop you closer. I really have to get those strings for my bass.”

“No, no, it’s okay. The station is right here. Wait a minute, you play bass?” Now that she thought about it, hadn’t Ricky mentioned something about missing rehearsal that day in the food court? “Are you in a band?” She asked excitedly.

Sarah’s childish excitement put a smile on Letty’s lips.

“Yes, with Ricky and a few friends, from the store mostly.”

“That’s awesome. I love music. What style do you play? Maybe I can see you guys play one of these days?”

Letty chuckled. “We play mostly rock or pop rock, and folk as well. We play campuses once in a while so…Who knows? But hey, if you take the apart with me, I’ll take you to the studio to see us. And I promise we’ll try not to suck, just for you.”

Sarah’s smile melted Letty. She looked younger with that shy smile and that hint of blush in her cheeks.

“I guess we’ll see about that,” Sarah said as she straightened. With a smile and a wave, she left to go back to Glendale. Letty went to the agency to give the keys back and talk to her friend about it, stopping to buy her strings on the way.

 

***

 

The Weismans walked out of church alongside the preacher after the service. Annie was beaming to have both her husband and daughter with her. Fredrick was not a man of faith, but church didn’t faze him, so he sometimes accompanied his wife, knowing this made her happy. Sarah, on the other hand, used to follow her mother every Sunday until she went to college at Northwestern. Now that she was back in LA, she hadn’t resumed going to church with her mother, but Annie hadn’t called her out about it so far. However, Sarah knew that she really appreciated her being here today.

“It was a pleasant surprise to see you here today, Sarah. Your congregation has missed you,” the preacher said as he laid a gentle hand on her shoulder.

“I know, I’m sorry, Reverend. I’ve been really engrossed in my classes, mid-terms and all, but it’s lighter now.”

“I understand, and I know you’re doing great. You’ve always been a brilliant scholar. Your mother is very proud of you.” Sarah knew there was a but coming. “However, one shall not forget the greatest teaching of all: That of our lord,” he said as he leaned a bit closer.

She gave him a tight smile. “Yes, of course, Reverend. I promise I’ll make time to come more often.”

Annie didn’t say anything, but Sarah could feel her gaze on her. The preacher nodded and shared a few words with Annie privately, then the Weismans walked toward the car and got into it. Sarah was silent. She crossed her arms over her chest.

“And now you’re pouting,” Annie told her.

“I’m not pouting.” Sarah raised her eyebrows and unfolded her arms to prove her point. “I come with you to make you happy and you go and tell Reverend Dominic to lecture me?”

Annie let out a soft chuckle. “This could hardly be called a lecture, honey. Besides, you’re not a child anymore. I didn’t tell Reverend Dominic anything.”

Fredrick smiled at the frown on his daughter’s face; he focused on the road again though.

“Then why didn’t he say anything to Dad? He must see him no more than three times a year.”

“This is because your father is not a devout. And while Reverend Dominic is glad when he’s present by my side, he’s not expecting him to be. You on the other hand are a Christian, and you used to come with me every Sunday. But then, senior year, then college…so I guess Reverend Dominic and I are both trying to know…where you stand these days.” Sarah swallowed and her mother added. “Religion-wise, that is.”

Sarah looked by the window. Her father gave a watchful glance at her in the rearview mirror, but let his wife speak.

“If anything has changed then…well, you can tell us. Has…something changed?”

“No,” Sarah said, crossing her arms on her chest again, but this time it was not in a stubborn gesture, it resembled more as if she was trying to shield herself. She wasn’t sure about the tone in her mother’s voice. It sounded a strange mixture of curiosity and dread as well. “Nothing’s changed. I just...feel a little withdrawn from religion. I still believe in God, I just…” She couldn’t find the words, even less voice it to her mother. She couldn’t voice it to herself yet.

“I worry about you, honey,” Annie said when Sarah stayed silent.

“Don’t. I’m fine, Mom, okay? I have great grades. I love my classes. Why would you worry?”

“Because college isn’t everything. I know you’ve never been a people person but these past few years, or what I’ve seen of it, you’re so withdrawn in yourself, your books and your little world.”

“I’m not withdrawn, Mom. I just like my quiet. Most parents would be relieved that their child didn’t fall into the heavy partying and dropping out of college on the first year statistic, you know. Just sayin’.”

Fredrick smiled. “We are proud of you, princess, and we know that we can trust you. But we want to see you happy.”

“I’m happy.”

Annie and Fredrick briefly glanced at each other.

“I am.” Sarah insisted as she witnessed the silent exchange. “Is it about Aymeric? Or Jason?” Sarah said, looking first at her mother then at her father.

Annie complained. “Emily told me he didn’t wish to see you anymore.”

“I bet he doesn’t.”

“But I don’t understand. She said he told her you had nothing in common but that makes no sense: you study almost the same subjects, he’s a Christian like you, and he’s close to his family like you are. He’s a good boy.”

“Right,” Sarah said rolling her eyes.

“I just don’t understand. You are smart and kind and so pretty. But Emily…she used other words, but it sounded a lot like you were not interesting enough.”

“Uh,” Sarah said with a fake laugh. “Well, given what he’s interested in, then no, I’m probably not interesting for him.”

“Oh, come on, sweetheart. I’ve known Emily for fifteen years, and Aymeric too. He was choir boy for crying out loud.”

“He’s not ten anymore, Mom. I’m telling you, he’s no choir boy anymore. Last time he was at the house he walked out and called me a baby because I wouldn’t put out.”

She saw the ‘o’ that formed on her mother’s lips.

“Yes, Mom. Having a little bit of naughty fun was his idea of passing time while you and his mother were downstairs talking church stuff. He wasn’t interested in discussing literature or history, or anything that didn’t require me lying down on my back on the bed.”

“Sshush honey. He seems like such a nice young man. Are you sure there’s no way you could have misinterpreted his words?”

Fredrick tightened his grip on the wheel.

“You said it, Annie. We raised a smart and kind girl. And an honest one. If she said he acted inappropriately, then he did.”

The smile that formed on Sarah’s lips was worth millions as she searched her father’s gaze in the rearview mirror. His features hardened though as he added. “No need to add that I’d better not see that boy in our house again, Annie. And while you’re at it, make sure I don’t come across his mother because I’ll tell her my view on her interesting boy.”

Fredrick didn’t intervene often but when he did, it was usually final.

He glanced at Sarah in the rearview mirror and she mouthed out the words thank you. He winked at her.

“At least Jason isn’t a jerk,” he said with a tease in the voice as he glanced at his wife. She shrugged it off.

“It’s all right. I have plenty of friends with single nice sons.”

“Jesus. You two are quite a pair,” Sarah said but it suddenly dawned on her that she had made her decision. She needed to move out of the house where she could have a little more freedom, and not be subjected to her parents’ matchmaking attempts every other day.

She would call Letty later this afternoon to ask her if it was still okay and say yes. Now, all she needed was to tell her parents, especially her mother.

This could wait a little while longer though…say, until they start wondering why she’s not coming home for dinner anymore or sleeping in her bedroom.

 

***

 

Sarah called Letty in the afternoon to tell her the news. They talked for a little while. Sarah realized half an hour had passed when they hung up; she hadn’t seen the time go by. She met Letty at the agency on Wednesday to sign the papers. They could move in as soon as Friday.

They were walking out of the Century 21 Hollywood agency.

“Ricky’s gonna bring my stuff in his truck. Not that I have much, as I’ve told you. He can do that for yours as well if you want to?”

“No, that’s okay. I’ll, well, I don’t really know. But except for my bed, everything fits in my dad’s car, so…I’ll probably borrow our neighbor’s trailer for the bed. I don’t have much besides this. It’s still okay for your fridge and stove, right?”

“Of course. Still okay for your coffee table?”

Sarah nodded with a smile. “And my TV, don’t worry.”

“I’m not worried. I have mine. Sure, your forty-eight inch beats my twenty-two anytime, but it’ll still do, if anything else,” she said with a smile. “You sure it’s not gonna be a hassle to take it?”

“It’ll be fine. My dad will help…once I tell him.”

Letty’s eyes widened. “You haven’t told them yet?”

“I’ll do it this weekend, I think.”

Letty smiled. “Don’t you think they’ll notice what with you moving your stuff out and all?”

Sarah grimaced. “Yep. Plus, I really do need my dad to help. I only have my bed, the coffee table and the TV and my bedside table. The rest, my clothes and books, is no problem. Although book-wise, it’ll be quite heavy.”

“Haven’t you heard about that great invention called the e-reader?”

“Oh I have one. But I love paperbacks so much, so I switch once in a while. And I just…read a lot so…heavy. I guess I don’t have to take them all, but I’ll just feel so naked without them.”

Letty couldn’t help a brief look up and down Sarah’s body at the thought of a naked Sarah. She briefly shook her head but the red that had crept up Sarah’s cheeks let her know she had noticed.

“What about your friends? Can’t they give you a hand?” Letty willingly moved on topic.

“My friends?” Sarah questioned with a frown.

“Well, you know, the people you hang out with, go to the movies with, for example. That thing we call friendship. Usually you help them, they help you. You know, like Ricky and me.”

“Thanks for the explanation. I’ve just learned something new,” Sarah said with rolled eyes. Letty grinned.

“Okay, but seriously. If you need any help. We can go to your house and pick up your stuff. It’ll be simpler for you.”

“That’s sweet of you, but you’re working this weekend, you said so. You’ll be busy moving in after work, you’ll spend enough time in traffic already. It’ll be fine, really, even if I move out a little later.”

“Oh come on, you’re not gonna chicken out now, are you?”

“No,” Sarah said and looked at the pavement, as they still stood just outside of the agency.

“Oh yes, you are. You’ve got that look.”

“What look? You don’t know me.” This wasn’t said harshly.

“Oh, but I’m getting a pretty good feeling about you.”

“Is that so?” Sarah said, looking up at her with more daring than she truly felt comfortable with.

“Oh yes. You know what, I’m gonna go home with you right now, and talk to your parents for you, or you’ll never move out.”

Sarah smiled, almost laughed even. “That would work well.”

Letty mimicked shaking hands with someone. “Hello Mr. and Mrs. Weisman. I’m here to tell you that your twenty-one-year old daughter is moving out. Your attempts to shack her up have given her monstrous migraines, so she’s telling you the only way for her to actually get some is to move out of Mommy and Daddy’s apron strings. It was nice meeting you, ma’am, sir.”

Sarah was laughing by the time Letty finished.

“Oh yes, that will work so fine.”

“See?”

They stared at each other silently as they sobered. Letty couldn’t help but admire Sarah’s blue eyes. Sarah looked away after a while. Letty’s intense dark stare was once again too much to handle. She had very expressive eyes. Too expressive somehow.

“Okay. I’ll talk to my parents tonight. Tomorrow at the latest. Hopefully my dad can help me move out this weekend.”

They started walking along the pavement.

“Well, you have my number if you need an extra pair of hands, or two ‘cause Ricky’ll gladly help. He thinks you’re hot. Well, what a stupid thing to say. Who wouldn’t think so?” It wasn’t actually a question. Letty was still walking and seemed to have said this as naturally as possible. Sarah, on the other hand, stood and stared at her with surprise. She blushed, then panic settled over her.

“Um. No. I’ll, uh, be okay.”

Letty stopped walking when she noticed the look on Sarah’s face and her hesitant speech.

“What’s wrong, Sarah?”

“No, um. I just…I don’t want any misinterpretation between us.”

“Sure,” Letty said with a frown. Sarah swallowed and Letty understood. “It’s because I said you’re hot?”

Sarah opened her mouth but gulped instead.

“Well, I could say you’re ugly but that’s not true. Does that make you feel uncomfortable because I’m a lesbian, I mean, ‘cause you know, we’re gonna be living together, so…”

“No, it’s, I mean yes. I mean, no, I’m not uncomfortable because you’re a…because you’re gay. I just want to make sure you…’cause I’m not. You know. I‒I’m straight. And we are going to be living together so…”

“Okay. Just so you know, because I say you’re hot doesn’t mean I want to sleep with you. It just means I have eyes.”

Sarah blushed again before shaking her head. “I’m not hot.”

“Damn, you really have to work on your self-confidence there. And I can assure you are.”

“I wouldn’t qualify myself as hot. No but, look at you; you’re tanned, you’ve got amazing curves, like men love. You have fantastic abs. I mean, I tend to think that this qualifies as hot, not me.”

“You think I’m hot, uh? So you wanna sleep with me?”

Sarah’s blush seemed to light her face on fire. She looked sideways at the pavement before laughing quietly. “Okay. You got me. It’s just that, I don’t want this kind of things to get in the way, you know. You seem like a great roommate. And this apartment is really great, and so close to UCLA. I wouldn’t want anything to spoil this.”

“I understand, but nothing will. We’ll have a blast together. A friendly blast,” Letty said as she raised her hands innocently in the air. “I promise.”

Sarah chuckled and nodded.

They talked a little more as they reached the metro station Sarah walked into. Letty reached her car, drove to the studio that officially served to her and her friends for band rehearsal room, but unofficially, for Animal Protection group meetings.

 

***

 

Letty moved in on Friday evening, helped by Ricky, Sally and Pete, other friends from both the store and the band. For her bedroom she brought her bed, a bedside table, and a chest of drawers, but mostly CDs and DVD racks, filled with blu-rays and DVDs. She placed a few books on the chest of drawers. She would have to buy a wall shelves to gain more room for books. She knew she would have to do so for the CDs as well. In the main room she installed her fridge, which was a reasonable size. She filled it and the cupboards with food from the store. She also brought another chest of drawers that she put near the entryway. She knew that Sarah would bring a coat stand. She would also bring a microwave, the TV, and its TV stand, although they had talked about finding a place on the wall for it to save space in the room. The rest of Sarah’s furniture would be for her own room except for a ceiling high cupboard in the bathroom. They needed to go shopping for a couch they would both like and a washing machine because Letty had been using the laundry across from the store so far. They also needed lampshades and curtains for the bedrooms. Those were the only thing they needed to settle in. In the meantime, Letty had brought the armchair she used in the small room above the store she had been living in for the past year.

Letty and her friends were eating together in the new apartment, sitting on the floor.

“You’re going to need chairs,” Sally said.

Letty nodded. “That’s what I was just thinking about.”

“At least one, obviously.”

Letty turned to look at the kitchen counter. “No. We’ll need at least two barstools. I know I like to eat on the armchair, soon to be replaced by a comfy couch, but I don’t know about Sarah. I doubt she likes eating on a couch, though.”

“Who cares?” Sally said with a shrug. Ricky nodded.

Letty just went on, ignoring the comment.

“I’m gonna be living with her. I’ll be cooking probably more often than she will. We need two chairs, so we can eat at the counter.”

“I really don’t envy your part in all this,” Sally told her.

Letty wanted to say that it wasn’t a part, but she stayed silent as this instinctive thought surprised her, if she was honest with herself. It was supposed to be an act, but thinking about the apartment, talking with Sarah about it, and thinking about what they needed to shop for to make it comfy… It had felt natural, as if she were moving in with a friend, and she had really felt the excitement. She still did.

She sighed and focused on her mushroom ravioli as she remained silent.

“How is she in general?” Sally asked as if she were talking about a fallen celebrity or worse, a fallen dictator.

“She’s just a girl, um, young woman. She’s actually pretty cool.”

Ricky shrugged. “Too bad that she didn’t let us help with her stuff. It would have been a nice occasion. And you’d have been done with it.”

Letty shook her head. “No, too soon. We’d have been the only possibility.”

“Carl’s been in place for a while now, it could have worked.”

“If we rely on could, the next meal we’ll share will be in jail. It’s too soon, the outside network will take much longer to set up,” she said, her tone firm, ending the discussion.

“I think you’re right.” Sally agreed and kept eating.

“So, do we practice tomorrow night or what? Last rehearsal was awful,” Letty said, moving on topic.

“Yeah. We’ve been too focused on…other plans.” Ricky whispered as if they were being tapped. “But yeah. We have to get our game back on, or they’ll throw us off stage at UCSB next month.”

“We still have three weeks,” Sally said.

Letty nodded. “How about we cool down the other plans. Everything is in motion; we just need to be patient now. Instead, why don’t we relax a little bit, and keep practicing a little more?”

“I don’t know about that. This is my weekend at the shelter,” Sally told her.

Letty agreed with a nod.

Ricky stared at her. “And have you forgotten the protest after work on Sunday?”

“Right. Jeez, where have I been?” She had forgotten about the protest against Sea World in San Diego.

“I really don’t know, but definitely not here. You’ve been daydreaming all week long. Remember, you said it yourself, ‘no rest for the wicked’. Animal abusers don’t relax.”

“You’re right. Oh, and there’s the street team. I’m on Santa Monica duty Saturday evening. This is gonna be one long day. The leaflets are ready, right?”

“Yep.”

“Good,” she said with renewed enthusiasm. Well, rehearsal or anything normal, would have to wait.

Ricky clicked his glass of water against Letty’s lemonade one.

“Until every cage is empty.” They cheered in unison.

 

***

 

Sarah decided to move in on Sunday afternoon. Traffic was better and everyone supposed to come was available. She was arranging the cupboard Jason and Garth, another of her father’s interns, had just moved against the far wall in her bedroom. She knew her mother was watching. She also knew there was a frown on her face, but she didn’t want to hear it. Obviously, she would though. She would just avoid it as long as she could. Adrian, one of her father’s handsome students, was in the living room, adjusting the cable on the TV set. Sarah knew her mother would wait for them to be alone to tell her whatever it was that was wrong with the apartment, according to her.

“Now it’s perfect.”

She saw the tight smile on her mother’s face as she gave a polite nod.

“Garth and Jason are still downstairs?” Sarah asked as her mother and she exited her bedroom.

Her mother didn’t have time to answer as Adrian replied. “They’re pulling the bed out of the truck. I’ll go help. You stay put; we’ll be here in no time.”

Sarah nodded and managed to suppress a laugh. Adrian was shorter than she was and probably weighed less. With his glasses and his way with techs, he was the typical geek. He was handsome though, she had to give her father some credit for that. He definitely had some cute-looking interns and students. Sarah wondered now if it wasn’t why her father had, secretly, taken the news of her moving out so well. He had been so eager to volunteer his boys for the not-so-big move. Sarah smiled at the thought, but she sobered when she saw the way her mother inspected the small bathroom.

“So what is it, Mom?”

“What? Nothing honey. I’m just…visiting.”

“Okay,” Sarah said before heading toward the TV to admire the neat connection Adrian had made. She couldn’t even see the cords, or most of them. He had hooked up her TV to a high definition home cinema she had gotten two Christmas ago, but had never put in her own room. She had thought about it immediately when she made the decision to move in, knowing Letty would probably enjoy it.

“Your father told me he’s changed his mind about the car. Indeed, it would be great for you to have a car.”

“Mmm,” Sarah said as she put her hands on her hips. “He’s suddenly thought about that now that I’m moving out?”

“Well, you can still come back. With a car, you don’t need to stay…here anymore.”

“I like it here.”

Annie smirked as if Sarah had told a joke.

“Well, I do, Mom. And I can just walk to UCLA.”

“But it’s so small, Sarah. How can you choose here over the comfort of your own home? And we will barely see you anymore.”

Annie glared, hands on her hips, at the grin Sarah gave her.

“You’re the one who came running back home because college life was not all that great for you, Sarah. What makes you think it will be different this time?”

Sarah sat on Letty’s armchair. “Ouch. I didn’t know that was how Dad and you thought about it. Where’s Dad, about that? He dropped his boys and left; he didn’t even see the apartment.”

“He had to meet the dean. He’ll be back to take us for lunch in the restaurant half a mile from here. As for Northwestern, we had to assume, since you didn’t exactly throw us a bone about what happened there, honey.”

“Nothing happened, Mom.”

“I’m your mother, I know better. Your GPA dropped, then you came home out of the blue.”

“My GPA didn’t drop, Mom. I just really missed my home, the sun, and LA. Besides, UCLA was always my goal.”

“Good. Brings us back to why you left in the first place because there too, we were left in the dark, your father and I. You were set to start in your dream school, and you changed your mind at the last minute.”

“I was stupid, okay. I thought maybe I needed to get away from home, from you guys, I’ll admit that. Call it a teenage whim, if you want. I thought ‘college now’; I needed to be a little more on my own.”

Annie caressed the side of her daughter’s face.

“You’re always on your own, honey. You’ve always been so quiet and withdrawn, always in your books. I was so afraid for you when you left. I knew it wouldn’t work.”

Sarah moved away slightly.

“It worked, Mom. I’ve had three great years there, okay two. I fared a little less well that last one but nothing dramatic, either. So, it did work, but then I felt like I had nothing to do, being all the way there. I wanted to be here. But I was never supposed to rely on you and still live at home with you and Dad. I need to make my own life, Mom. I’m twenty-one.”

Annie sighed but the look on her face betrayed she was aware of that.

“I know. And I guess this place is not so bad. But it’s just so small.”

“It’s not that small.”

“Are you joking? It fits in your bedroom. All of it.”

“You’re exaggerating. Besides, do you know that students sometimes pay twice as much as my rent here, only to be squeezed at three or four in an apartment this size?”

Annie stayed quiet because she knew Sarah was right.

“So really, Letty found us a great deal on that one.”

Annie stayed quiet but Sarah knew she wanted to say more. The three young men came back with the bed. They finished installing Sarah’s furniture properly. All she had to do now was arrange her clothes and books in her bedroom. She wanted to do this quietly, after everyone went back home. She eagerly awaited the moment when she would be alone in her new home. But she had to play along as they all went to eat when Fredrick called to say he was on his way.

Since she ended up sitting in between Jason and Adrian, she definitely knew it was part of her father’s plan. Not that they were not nice young men, but she felt…nothing, she had to admit. They were cute, clever, and they obviously found her to their taste, both of them, but there was not the slightest spark on her side at least. She wished there was though; it would make things so much easier. She talked to them and smiled at them as much as possible but truthfully, she couldn’t wait to go home. She smiled as the word echoed in her mind. Weirdly, and even though she would be sharing it with someone she didn’t know very well, it felt like home already.

Fredrick went to pay for everyone to thank the boys for helping. As they waited for Jason to come back from the restrooms, Fredrick, Garth and Adrian began talking about a science article they’d read. Mother and daughter were walking arm in arm already exiting the restaurant.

“So, tell me more about this Letty?”

Sarah smiled but it was a tense smile.

“I found it weird you hadn’t said anything yet,” she told her mother.

Annie shrugged a little. “Forgive me for finding it a bit strange that you would move in with someone you barely know. You never made friends easily. In fact, I’ve rarely seen you spend much time with friends at all except for Anita.”

Sarah looked away at the mention of her former BFF. Well, her only friend in high school, in all honesty.

“Who is that woman?”

“I told you, I met her on campus.”

“But you said she wasn’t a student there?”

“No, she owns a store, a cooperative vegan store.”

“Now, that’s interesting.”

Sarah was surprised by the honesty in her mother’s word, so she couldn’t help glancing at her to make sure she was not being ironic, but she wasn’t.

“So no, I don’t know her that much, but I can tell. She’s a great person. And guess what, this morning when I came in, she had left vegan donuts for me. How sweet is that? I mean, she’s only moved in on Friday, I haven’t seen her since, but she cooked, and she left some for me to welcome me on my moving-in day. I found that to be very thoughtful.”

“Very, indeed.”

Now there was definitely a hidden tone in Annie’s words, but she didn’t want to know more about it, or what Annie might be thinking.

“I’ll be fine, Mom. And I’ll visit every Saturday if you want, or Fridays. I’m always free on Friday afternoon, you know that. Can’t miss your pies!” She told her mother, slightly bumping her shoulder. Annie smiled but pouted at the same time.

“It just won’t be the same,” Annie said as they reached the cars.

“I know, Mom. But I—”

“You’re an adult now,” Annie said with a proud smile at her daughter. She caressed the side of her face. “I’m sorry, sweetheart. You have to make your own life, I know that. Besides, we’ve raised a kind, independent, and brilliant young woman. Just know that we’re proud of you.”

Mother and daughter hugged each other. Fredrick smiled at the sight. He waved at Jason and Adrian, who were riding together as they shared an apartment downtown with two more students from USC. Both of them went to hug Sarah, who accepted the hug willingly. She was still pondering her mother’s words, so she didn’t mind the closeness. She was not someone who really liked being hugged by anyone other than her parents. It had always been that way. Garth was more reserved, which was fine by her. He had come on his bicycle and left the same way after a polite goodbye.

Jason and Adrian left after she thanked them again. She hugged her father. Her mother told her that she was always welcome in her old room any day. Sarah smiled and hugged her again before Annie and her husband got into their car to drive home. Sarah was left very pensive, but glad, as she walked the half-mile that separated the restaurant from the condo. She eagerly climbed the three floors to her new home.

 

***

 

Sarah was arranging pictures on her bedside table when Letty knocked and popped her head in since the door to Sarah’s room was ajar. Sarah had never closed her bedroom door once in her life. She hated closed doors.

“So?” Letty said with such a childish grin that Sarah laughed. “We’re all settled?” Letty added as she moved inside. “Damn, makes me wanna jump on the mattress and have a pillow fight.” Sarah was laughing even more, but admittedly, she felt that childish excitement too.

Letty looked around to see how Sarah had arranged her bedroom. There was a giant cupboard in the back and a medium-size bed with a bedside table on the left side. Letty wasn’t surprised about the size of the cupboard when she saw the three empty large travel bags on the floor; one was half tucked under the bed, but Sarah had probably stopped to do something else then. Had they all contained clothes? Letty thought about her clothes, they fitted in one large bag, that was it. But she figured Sarah’s bags had also probably contained books. She smiled and sat on the bed beside Sarah.

“I thought you said you had a king-sized?”

“I left it in my bedroom at Glendale. I took one of the guest room’s beds. Figured it’d leave me more room. Besides, it’s large enough for me.”

“Yep. And that way you can squeeze with your honey. You’re a smart girl.”

Sarah shrugged with a smile. She finished putting up a third picture frame. There was one of her parents, one of Sarah with a girl in a cat costume while Sarah, as Letty recognized her, was wearing a dog one. And the last picture frame was of a young Sarah rolled into the snow with a teenage girl holding her by the waist, somewhat keeping her down on the snow. Both were laughing hard.

“You look so young on that pic and damn, that girl is cute!” Letty said as she picked up the photograph. Sarah smiled but she put the other picture, the one with her and a friend in costume, face down on the bedside table. Letty noticed but didn’t comment; she was busy checking out the photograph she held in her hands. That landscape was definitely not California.

“Girlfriend? She’s older, right?”

“No! I mean, yes she’s older, but I told you, I’m straight.”

“Okay, then please, be a good friend and introduce us.”

Sarah shook her head with a pout.

Letty shrugged. “What? I’ve been single for a while and that brunette, definitely hot. Plus, that picture has a good couple of years, so she must be legal now. And she’s gay, right?”

“What? How.” Sarah took the picture from Letty’s hand and stared at it. “Can you tell…just like that?”

“Don’t panic. No, it’s not written on people’s face, most of the time. I don’t really know, I’ll admit. Just wishful thinking, maybe?”

Sarah relaxed. “Anyway yes, she likes women, yes, she’s legal, twenty-seven now if I count well but no, I can’t introduce you. I mean I could, but we’d have to fly all the way to New Hampshire, you know.”

“Jeez, I knew this wasn’t CA but did it have to be so far? That’s just too much trouble for one girl.”

Sarah laughed lightly before staring at the picture. “We lived in Manhattan at that time. Gosh I remember that winter, we had so much fun. I think it was just before Aunt Shannon died. This is my cousin Charlene. It’s the last great memory I have of this place. Charlie was never quite the same after that.”

“I bet. Must be hard. How old were you on that photograph?”

“She’s sixteen and I was ten. Despite the age difference we used to be very close, she was like a big sister, then she closed up a little and things went…a lot of things I didn’t understand. It was hard for me to follow, especially from the other side of the country. She never visited anymore when her dad, my uncle, came. And then I was busy too. I wish I’d been a better friend.”

“You were young.”

“Still. I know she went through a rough patch these past couple of years. Some fucked up stuff; those were my father’s words which says something because my dad is neither judgmental nor the type to use words like that but…I don’t know what happened, but it shook everyone. My mom told me that my cousin was sick, and it was not the she’s got the flu type of sick. She’s known Charlie was gay for a long time, so it wasn’t about that either, although after she learned of her orientation, she was truly delighted that our move to California made it hard for Charlie and me to spend so much vacation time together anymore.”

Letty nodded with a smile. “I’ll bet. Why don’t you call her anyway? Your cousin, I mean.”

“I saw her last month, actually.”

“Really?”

“Yes. I went to New York with my dad to a colloquium. Well, there was a book signing I really wanted to attend, so it was two birds with one stone; it made my dad happy that I came with him. Charlie was in town, for business she said, and we had dinner.”

“That’s great.”

“No, yes, I mean… It would have been better if my dad hadn’t been there. It was hard to talk about personal stuff. Every time I tried to ask about her personal life, Dad cut the talk. It was annoying. But Charlie didn’t say anything though. I can’t believe I didn’t call her all those years. She’s taken so much shit from everyone, but she didn’t complain. She looked fine though, better than the last time I’d seen her and…” Sarah blushed. “I kind of think she was in town for a girl.”

“So that’s good then.”

“Yeah, well, I tried to tell that to Dad, but he said that her ex also lives in New York. I guess that’s why he was so annoying that evening.”

“So, everyone freaking out was about a girl then?”

“Yes. Something about her last girlfriend had everyone’s panties in a bunch, if I may use that term.”

“And you think she was there to see her ex?”

“I don’t know. I didn’t ask or didn’t get to ask. We used to be so close at some point…I’m lame. I never tried to find out what was happening. But you’re right; I’ll call her soon and see how she’s doing.”

“I’m sure she’ll appreciate it.” Letty stared deeper into the picture. “What is that big plume of smoke we see behind the hill?”

“It’s the main chimney from Shannon. They own a glass factory, renamed it Shannon after her mother, Shannon, died. Charlie owns it since my uncle retired.”

“Oh wow, you mean,” Letty got up and picked up the crystal unicorn that lay on the bookshelf standing on the wall opposite the cupboard.

“She does that?”

Sarah held back a chuckle. “Yes, it was a gift. I think it’s the first she made. I loved unicorns…back then,” Sarah said with an apologetically shrug.

“No, no, really that’s cool.” She turned it, carefully, into every way. “It’s actually beautiful, and now that I’m reassured you’re not tasteless, I can fully appreciate the work.”

Sarah chuckled more generously.

“We really did use to be close, so I always kept it.”

“Yeah you ought to. And you should also definitely call her.”

“I will.”

Letty left Sarah to her picture arranging. She didn’t ask anything about the picture Sarah had hidden from her. Maybe she would later.

 

A little while later, Sarah walked to Letty’s room; she could see the light through the thin overture. She knocked and meant to peek inside, but Letty stood in front of her in a second, blocking her view and giving her a jump.

Sarah smiled, although the gesture surprised her. “Sorry, didn’t mean to barge in,” she said and couldn’t help trying to take a look around.

“No, no it’s me. The room’s such a mess. I really didn’t have time to arrange anything yesterday.”

“Okay, no problem. Um, I cooked something, are you hungry?”

Letty bit her lower lip. “You cooked? I thought you were afraid of my old stove?”

“You’ve got that right. The damn thing could burn the whole place.” Sarah noticed Letty’s raised eyebrows; the brunette could barely hide her smile and Sarah pursed her lips in a slight pout. “Okay. I opened a bag of rice and mushrooms and put it in the microwave. It just rang anyway, so…dinner’s ready.”

Letty put her hand on her hip. “Okay, Wednesday we add the stove to the shopping list, right after couch and before curtains. I’ll show you what cooking means.”

“Careful, I might take you up on that offer.”

“You can. I’m gonna blow your mind,” Letty said with raised eyebrows.

“Okay, um,” Sarah’s face was turning different shades of pink, and she avoided looking into Letty’s eyes which was something that, admittedly, Letty found very cute. “So, um, you’re hungry?”

“I’ll be out in a minute, just finishing something.”

“Okay,” Sarah said, rubbing her forehead with the back of her thumb before looking at Letty briefly, and finally heading back to the kitchen.

Letty shook her head. The smile on her lips faded as soon as she shut the door. She leaned against it, eyes closed for a few moments, trying to shake the strange feelings rising inside. She straightened as she turned around. She stared at several items spread on her bed and shook her head. She had to be more careful, she thought, as she began putting a few untraceable pre-paid cell phones into her bedside drawer. She folded the map she had of USC’s Science Department and put it into her purse so she could bring it back to HQ as soon as possible. This couldn’t stay here, not with Sarah so close.

At that thought, Letty turned around; she could hear plates being put on the kitchen bar. Sweet Sarah was cooking for her, their first meal together in their shared apartment. Letty swallowed and stared in front of her, once again wondering about that feeling that coursed through her. It couldn’t be remorse, could it?

She looked at the bottom of the bed on which a poster laid face down, sellotape on each corner and she nodded. She stood, took it, then went to place it beside the others on her wall. She fixed it and stared into the agonizing eyes of a cow, held by one leg, blood pouring out of her slit throat. She nodded again. No, it could not be remorse because only people responsible for these kinds of things had to know this feeling. She crossed her arms and looked at the whole wall and nodded again. This was for the greater good. With a last nod she left her room, which she locked and joined Sarah.