Chapter Fifty-Three: Aspie Humor

Q:		Do Aspies have a sense of humor?
A:		No, we have absolutely no sense of humor at all. Full stop. (In case you can’t tell there, I was being funny. Yet another winning, cringeworthy joke from me!) But before you throw down the book, I’ll answer seriously.

I find it a strange thing how the media have created this running stereotype about Aspies being solemn, serious people who don’t laugh at funny things or have any real sense of humor. I know where this idea comes from, but it couldn’t be more wrong. Many of the adult Aspies I know have a fantastic sense of humor. We’re quirky, witty, and creative in our banter, and I love the unique Aspie style.

I suppose the misunderstanding arises from the fact that Aspies and neurotypicals see humor in a very different way. We Aspies tell jokes that are a little out of the box, and typical people don’t always immediately get it. They assume we’re being weird instead of working out the meaning and realizing the humor. I guess some Aspie banter can require a little logical thinking to decipher.

Similarly, neurotypical people tell jokes that are figurative, and sometimes the younger, less experienced Aspies may not understand, giving them a rather aloof appearance. Inexperienced Aspies, particularly children or teens, also may fail to realize that when everyone else is laughing, the expected response is to smile and join in, even if you don’t get it.

Such an Aspie could seem quite out of place looking serious, perhaps even frowning when concentrating to understand, in a laughing crowd. Some Aspies take things factually and may find figurative jokes hard to understand. I think most of us can understand them, but we come in all types.

However, it doesn’t mean that Aspies are humorless and don’t enjoy a good laugh. It simply means that what we find funny may be different than what you do.

Aspie humor itself can often be very literal. When I see signs saying, “End road work,” I think, “Yes, road work is evil and must be stopped! Down with road work!” When I see a pedestrian crossing with lights and a sign saying, “Give way to cars when flashing,” I get images of flashers trying to keep out of the way of motor vehicles (and a whole lot of amusing driver reactions that could go along with that!).

Some friends of mine started a running joke recently about the evil race of Ped Xing. Ped Xing are nasty creatures that commuters are frequently warned about on black-and-yellow street signs. The warning pictures depict a man with a detached head briskly walking as if to cross a road. Under the picture, the creature is labeled in clear black letters: “Ped Xing.”

We understand that the Ped Xing are headless, zombie-like creatures that live by preying on the necks of regular humans to convert them to Ped Xing and further their race. They’re neither alive nor dead. It’s an epidemic, and they’re spreading fast! In some areas, when you drive down the road, you’ll see Ped Xing warning signs with flashing lights to warn you of major outbreaks in that area. In such places, it’s crucial that you cover your neck and remain in your vehicle at all times.

Sometimes, a Ped Xing may be depicted with his wife or even headless children. These images may look cute—but be warned that it’s only an illusion to draw you in. Even the Children Xing would have YOUR NECK in a second given the chance. Ped Xing are out there. People should beware!

Throughout this book, I have to say I haven’t included too much outside-the-box humor, partly because the subject matter is serious anyway, but mainly because I can never be sure if the reader would completely get it or whether it would just create confusion. If you have no idea what I was going on about in those two paragraphs above, then this is a perfect example of what I mean. It’s something I have to be careful about in real life too. I can’t just assume people will be witty and random enough to catch on.

Face to face, I myself am quite a smiley, jovial sort of girl and take humor in many things, Aspie and neurotypical alike. I have enough awareness and life experience to follow most anything. But of all the humor in the world, nothing really entertains me like a good Aspie run of nonsensical information. Taking common rules or comments and applying them to things that just don’t work. Making a statement that defines itself to be incorrect. Making a mockery of the way people use terms or phrases by applying them incorrectly. Throwing in ideas that are completely random for no reason, and linking all things back to previous inside jokes.

I love quirky humor. It’s the best! And if you don’t believe me, you can check with Ped Xing. He even has his own Facebook page!^[48] Go ahead. Log in. Friend him! He may not tell you the answer, but if he takes your neck, then at least that’s one less person in the world who disagrees with me! Mwahahaha!

Of course, I’m kidding there. In real life, I don’t actually go around killing or conspiring to kill people all that much. In fact, I’ll admit it, I’m boring. I haven’t been involved in killing any at all! I’m just a nerd who stays at home not murdering people in my free time. Lame, I know.

So, to finish off, here is an Aspie joke that a friend of mine wrote recently on Facebook and I just had to quote. It speaks for itself. Brilliant. Or at least I think so.

	A horse walks into a bar, and the Aspie bartender says, “Why the long face? You’re a horse, so your face is physically long compared to that of a human, which is what I am. I’m asking like I want to know why you’re depressed, but the truth is that the situation is more literal than one would expect.”
	The horse didn’t say anything, because horses can’t talk.
	—Josh Mitchell