Present
My alarm went off at six, but my eyes were wide open. I was lying on my couch in my office. We had been up until midnight discussing plays and strategies for today’s opener. I hadn’t been this nervous in years. The sports world would have a lot to say about my debut as offensive coordinator, and a win would go a long way toward proving my worth. Fuck, I was tired. I was physically and emotionally drained and the day hadn’t even started.
“Come on, boy. Let’s get you outside.” Crowbar was on his bed by the couch.
I stretched and grabbed my toiletry kit and game day clothes and headed toward the women’s locker room. Crowbar lumbered behind me. I dropped my things off and unlocked the door to the practice field. There was a tiny area beside the building that Crowbar deemed his. Since the place was going to be crawling with people soon, I made him come back inside. I took a quick shower and slipped into a fresh Cheetahs polo and pressed khakis. I knew I would change at least one more time before the game. We had an interview with media at ten while the team warmed up.
Brandon was in the hallway when I left the locker room. “Good morning, Coach. You ready for your big day?” he asked. He surprised me by hugging me. It felt nice and relieved a lot of pressure. He was a pound hugger with the guys, but with me, he excluded the handshake.
“As ready as I’ll ever be. I can’t imagine shoving anything else in my brain,” I said,
“We’ll adjust as the game gets underway. I feel good about today.”
Brandon was the kind of guy who would stick by you no matter what. I knew we were going to be friends. Tina was very nice and it was refreshing to see somebody support their partner one hundred percent. I hadn’t talked to or texted Lexi since she informed me she met somebody and was moving out. How was that possible? We’d only moved here two months ago. My ego was bruised, but honestly, I was relieved. It was one less conversation I had to have with her. Besides, she never liked Crowbar. Since coming to the office with me, he had a bit more spunk. I had more important things happening than Lexi at this moment. I followed Brandon to our meeting room and looked at the excited and worried faces in front of me.
“Players and coaches, are we ready?” I wasn’t prepared for the whoops and hollers that answered me. The special teams coach joined us for the pep talk before we met with the media. When we broke to meet with the press, I seriously wondered where the time went.
“Coaches, follow me,” Bill yelled.
The five defensive coaches joined me, Brandon, Jim, and Jamal. We followed Bill to the press room. I did a quick scan of the reporters but didn’t see Duane Spitzer. The shit storm he’d tried to stir up had died down since the interview Grayson and I gave at the team charity night. Hopefully, no one else would try to revisit Duane’s line of questioning.
At the large table Bill sat in the middle. I was on his left, Marcus on his right, with the rest of the coaches standing behind us. I wasn’t going to say a thing unless I was addressed, and even then, I was going to keep my answers to a minimum.
“Welcome to the Cheetahs press room. This is a big day for us and for the NFL. We’re excited to show our team to the world.” Bill pointed to a reporter. “Maria, why don’t you start us off?”
“Coach Tatum, was it difficult switching up your offense after Myers’s accident? You built up your offense based on his abilities.”
“Grayson Moats is a veteran player. He stepped into the position with poise and confidence. There wasn’t a single hiccup when he took over,” Bill said.
Bill wasn’t wrong. Grayson fit in well and picked up the plays with ease. He even made a few suggestions on plays Jamal designed. He was going to surprise everyone watching today.
After minutes of answering questions, I looked at the clock and started bouncing my knee. We needed to get out on the field and ensure our players were stretching and practicing and getting mentally prepared for the game. I needed it as much as they did.
“Good luck, coaches.” Several reporters echoed Maria’s sentiment.
Bill nodded and we followed him out to the field. The gates were open and fans were filing into the stadium. People wanted to see the new NFL team in action. We tested our microphones with Grayson and with the other coaches. Marcus was calling the plays from upstairs and I would walk the sidelines with Bill.
“Let’s pump the guys up,” Bill said.
We’d practiced them running onto the field twice on Friday. We were making our much-anticipated debut, and nobody wanted to screw it up. Bill and I walked into the locker room. The guys looked at us for words of encouragement. They were brimming with excitement. I was, too.
“We’re here to play ball. We’re not here to showboat or do backflips in the end zone. Does everybody understand me? You have one job for the next four hours. This is what we’ve trained for. We’re all at the start of something great here. Let’s do our jobs and come back with a win.” Bill’s encouragement got the entire team pumped up. We were taking the field in five. I’d never felt energy like this before. “Put your helmets on and let’s get ready to show the Browns and all the fans who we are and what we want. Who are we?” He cupped his hand behind his ear and waited for the team to yell.
“Cheetahs!”
“What do we want?”
“A win!”
He repeated himself until the entire team worked themselves into a frenzy yelling and fist-bumping one another. It was like the end of a rave and I made sure to stay clear. I stood back and waited for them to charge out of the locker room. They lined up in the tunnel, waiting to be introduced to the football world.
I was bursting with pride. I had a good feeling about today. One of the hottest singers, Bristol Baines, was singing the national anthem. A local high school was singing “God Bless America,” and three stealth bombers were going to fly over before the start of the game. My dad texted that he was in the stands even though I told him he could be escorted to me. I would catch up with him after the game.
“Cheetahs! Cheetahs!”
Hearing the fans scream gave me such a rush. I wasn’t expecting my introduction to make such an impact, but when I was announced, I was given a standing ovation. I waved and smiled, swallowing the lump that lodged itself in my throat. If I cried now, nobody would take me seriously. I found my dad on the fifty-yard line wearing a Cheetahs polo and whistling. I blew him a kiss and waved back. This was a big moment and as much as I hated attention, I loved every second. I was the first female offensive coordinator and people were celebrating my milestone. I wanted to fall to my knees and cry for every success and every failure I ever had on the football field. Instead, I took my spot on the sideline with the Cheetahs and waited patiently until kickoff. There were still another ten minutes of pre-game rituals before the game even started. The Browns won the toss and deferred. We were getting the ball first.
“Get out there and get good field position,” Bill yelled. He looked patient waiting for the kickoff. I was ready to jump out of my skin.
Ian Camper, our kick returner, caught the football and was off. It was so hard not to race beside him on the sideline. He broke through the first wave of tacklers. When he got to the forty, all of us started yelling. Not only was he slipping through holes the special teams created, but he was on track to run it all the way to the end zone. I clutched Bill’s arm unprofessionally as we watched the twenty-two-year-old walk-on from my alma mater stiff-arm the kicker and run it in for the first touchdown in the Cheetahs’ history book. Everyone went wild.
“If that doesn’t motivate all of us, I don’t know what will,” Bill yelled.
Ian raced over to Bill and handed him the ball. “That one was for you, Coach.” Fuck. I started tearing up. I turned my back and grabbed my tablet from the bench just to remove myself from the moment. We still had a whole game to play. I couldn’t afford to be outwardly emotional.
When Grayson threw the winning touchdown pass with forty-two seconds left in the game and our defense took the field to sack their quarterback, I celebrated. I wiped away tears and laughed as the linemen surprised Bill with the ceremonious Gatorade shower. I ran when I saw them coming.
I asked security to bring my dad down on the field. I smiled as I absorbed the atmosphere of our stadium and the fans who stuck around to watch our first win. I did my first solo interview with NBC’s Monica Meadows who was one of the few journalists I trusted. She was a reporter on the sidelines on big games and I knew she wasn’t going to blindside me with sexist questions.
“Coach, congratulations on the win. How important was it?” Monica asked.
“Nice to see you again, Monica. Today’s win was everything. It showed the world that the Cheetahs should be taken seriously and that we aren’t stopping and we’re not giving up.”
“You led the entire game. Was it hard to adjust to the game as it progressed?”
“Not at all. I feel like we had the advantage.”
“How so?” she asked.
“We watched games of the Browns from last season to get ready and they didn’t have any games of us to watch. They adjusted well, just not enough to win the game.”
“I know you have some celebrating to do. One final question. How’s the journey been to get here at this point?”
“It’s been both wonderful and strenuous, but worth it.”
“I know you’ve worked hard, Coach McCoy. Congrats again on a very memorable and emotional win.” I heard Grayson behind me so when I turned to congratulate him on a great first game, I wasn’t expecting Parker and their daughters to be on the field with him. I hated that she looked so perfect. She was wearing shorts and a Cheetahs jersey with Moats across the back. Seeing them kiss cut my great mood in half.
“Great game, Grayson.” I nodded at him.
“Same to you, Coach!” He had to yell over the crowd of reporters who surrounded him.
“Sutton!” my dad shouted.
Brandon was escorting him to me. I met them halfway and hugged my dad tightly. We were both crying. I didn’t care that we were in a field of cameras and interviews. My dad, the person who inspired me the most and stopped living his life so we could focus on mine, was here.
“I’m so proud of you. You did it, Sutton. You did it.” His aftershave took me back to when I was in high school. I could tell he’d lost weight. He said it was to be healthier, but I thought it was because he was slimming down for his new girlfriend.
“Wait a minute. Judy’s here and you left her in the stands?”
He wiped away his tears and laughed. “Well, security only grabbed me.”
“Dad, I’m going to have to give you dating tips because leaving your girlfriend in the stands isn’t going to get you any brownie points.”
“Mr. McCoy?” Parker said from behind me. “Hi. I don’t know if you remember me, but I used to go to Oak Grove with Sutton.”
My worlds were colliding again. I never told Dad that Grayson and Parker got married. The look of surprise on my father’s face couldn’t be faked.
“Of course, I remember you. Parker O’Neal. It’s good to see you again,” Dad said.
She put her hand on his hand briefly. “You look happy andwell.”
“So do you. Sutton didn’t tell me you all were back in touch,” he said. He was perplexed and I was scrambling, afraid he would say something inappropriate.
“She’s married to Grayson Moats now, Dad.”
“Oh. Okay.” He was slow to cover up his surprise. He noticed the kids wearing matching Moats jerseys. “And you have a family. That’s great.”
“Yes.” Parker put her hands on their shoulders. “These two little cheerleaders are so proud of their daddy and team.”
I squatted so I wasn’t so formidable to a six- and an eight-year-old. “And you must be Violet and Rose Moats.” I pretended to size them up. “I mean, unless I’m wrong and you’re actually here to try out for the team.” Their sweet, shy giggles made me smile.
“Cheerleading runs in the family,” Dad said.
“I’m sure football will, too,” Parker said. She turned her attention back to me. “Congratulations on your big win, Sutton. Are you celebrating tonight?”
“We’ll probably grill at my house. What about you?” It was easier to talk to her now since our spontaneous coffee break.
“We’ll probably go back to the house and do the same. I hope you get a chance to relax. I know Grayson’s been working hard, but he says the coaches are the last to leave and the first ones in,” she said.
She was literally pulled from the conversation when Grayson grabbed her hand. He said something low to her and kissed the girls. “Coach McCoy, they’re calling us,” he said to me. He nodded his head toward a reporter standing ten feet away. “Are you up for it?”
“Yeah, sure.” I followed him and waited for the reporter to cue us in. It was a live feed so I took several deep breaths and made myself focus. My emotions were all over the place.
“We won because we have great coaches and some of the league’s best players. Coach McCoy was instrumental in getting me here so I think she’s got pretty good instincts.” Grayson winked. “The Cheetahs might be a new team, but we played like champions today.”
When the reporter turned to me, I answered truthfully about how proud I was of the team and how Grayson was a true leader. My life was so strange. Here I was, again, after one of the biggest games of my life, with Grayson Moats. Only this time, we were on the same team. It was hard to wrap my head around it.