Present
“Grayson’s on fire today.” Bill pumped his fist and celebrated the fourth touchdown pass of the game.
The Bears were trailing by twenty-one points and no way would they catch us. Most of their players were moping on the other side of the field. Some had thrown their helmets under the benches in anger.
I sympathized with them. That was how I felt during the Bills game, but I could only stand on the sidelines and watch. I refused to show any emotion. If the cameras caught me having a temper tantrum, people would say “this is why women shouldn’t coach” or “women are just too emotional for this game.”
I high-fived Bill and the offense as they ran back to the bench. “He’s doing amazing stuff out there, that’s for sure,” I said.
Grayson seemed more confident and focused. He played to the crowd, and the more they cheered, the better he played. This was not the same guy who wept in front of me and almost lost his job because he showed up to work drunk.
We pocketed another win, bringing our season to 6-2. We were tied for first place in our division and the press was anxious to chat. Grayson was charming as ever with them and Bill answered questions about the season.
I stuck around because the team was having trick-or-treat at the stadium for the team’s families and I was passing out candy. The Cheetahs went all out. The admin staff decorated the cafeteria so it looked scary, but not too much because most of the kids were young. I wanted to wear my Cheetahs sweater and khaki pants, but Hayley said I had to participate. She altered a dog costume to make it look like Crowbar, and we had a Cheetahs dog jersey made with my last name for Crowbar to wear. Totally over the top, but I knew the kids would love it. I checked my watch. The festivities would begin at six. I had time to eat my salad, watch part of the game, and get ready for the party.
“Great game, Coach,” Marcus said.
“You all held them to only seven points. Great game, Coach,” I echoed Marcus’s congratulations. I liked Marcus because he was dedicated and wanted this team to succeed as much as I did. He was considered washed up by many analysts, so he wanted to prove everyone wrong. He was doing a hell of a job. “We’ll talk about it tomorrow. Are you sticking around for the party?” I thought he had little kids, but maybe those were his grandkids. I told myself to pay closer attention to the personal lives of the people I worked with.
He rolled his eyes and pointed down at his frame. He played defensive tackle twenty years ago but slipped out of shape as the years rolled on. “I’m sticking around but I’m not putting on a costume so I’ll be there as an NFL coach.”
I put my hands on my hips and shook my head at him. “I’m disappointed.”
“You sound like my wife,” he said.
“I might be the only coach dressed up. You’re all going to feel so left out.” I was saying it to pump myself up the more I realized how few coaches were participating.
“I’m sure you’re going to look great. I’ll see you up there.” He pointed up at the second floor with his clipboard.
“See you later,” I said.
Crowbar and I grabbed dinner, then celebrated the win with a quick game of fetch. Crowbar loved children. Truthfully, I was doing this for him. He pranced around when I slipped on the Cheetahs jersey Hayley’s mom made for him. His was easy. I was going to need help getting into my costume. I put on spandex shorts and a T-shirt and looked at the furry full bodysuit I was going to have to wear for the next two hours.
I had the costume around my thighs when my phone chirped that I had a text. I overestimated how far I could step and fell, banging my thigh on the edge of my desk in the process. “Ow!” I turned over and rubbed my leg. My mood was instantly fouled by the impending bruise on my thigh. A rapid knock on my door startled me. “What?”
“Are you okay?”
I looked up to find Parker standing in my doorway. “I’m on the floor of my office tangled in this costume. I don’t think I’m okay.” I took a deep breath. It wasn’t Parker’s fault that I fell.
She came all the way into my office and let the door close behind her. Her body was covered in pale purple and bright pink body paint and silver glitter. Her costume left little to the imagination. It wasn’t supposed to be sexy, but my mind and my body reacted as though she was wearing lingerie. The shimmering pearl-colored taffeta dress molded against her curves nicely. I couldn’t stop staring at her.
“Here, let me help you up.” She pushed back her wings and offered me both hands.
“Can I just stay here and die of embarrassment?” I asked. She looked amazing and I was on the floor with my black-and-brown fluffy costume twisted around my legs.
She knelt and looked over my body. “Where does it hurt?”
I pulled my hand back and showed her the red welt on the side of my thigh. “I hit the desk on my way down.”
She hissed in a breath. “I’m starting to think that your bruises from high school were because you were klutzy, not because you played football.”
I gasped at her teasing, then shrugged. “There might be some truth to that.” I struggled into a sitting position. “Why am I wearing a full body dog costume? I’m going to die of heat exhaustion.”
“Things could be worse.” Parker stood and helped me off the floor. She was stronger than she looked.
“Worse? How?” I couldn’t imagine anything worse. I put my arms in the sleeves and pulled the front up.
“You could smell like Brad.”
“Oh. Good point.” We both crinkled our noses recalling how bad Champ’s costume smelled after Brad changed.
She smiled. “Do you need help?”
“Yes, please.” I turned so she could zip me up. Her fingers on my back made me shiver. “How are you not cold? You’re barely dressed.”
“These boots are warm and a lot of people will be upstairs so I’m banking on body heat,” she said.
“You always ran warmer than everyone else.” That was a dumb thing to say.
She turned and found Crowbar stretched on the couch. “Hello, big boy.” His long tail thumped against the couch cushion as Parker petted him. He rolled over and gave her his belly.
“Crowbar gets all the girls,” I said. I pulled out the costume makeup Hayley packed for me. I prayed it washed off as easily as she promised it would. I started drawing lines to mimic Crowbar’s spots.
“Do you need help with that, too?” Parker asked.
“Why? Am I doing a bad job?” I moved closer to the full-length mirror that hung on the back of the door. My lines looked like his brindle fur. She slipped into the small space between me and the mirror. She was too close, but I didn’t move.
“No. I just figured it might be easier and faster if somebody does it for you.” She took the makeup pencil from me. “Your face like his?”
I nodded, choosing not to speak while we were this close. Her blue eyes were still piercing and her lips full. Her face had slimmed down over the years but had gained a few laugh lines around her eyes and mouth. Her makeup was perfect. I should’ve insisted on doing it myself but I selfishly wanted to be near her.
“Black nose?”
I rolled my eyes and nodded. “The works. Make me look like him.”
She laughed. “By the time I get done with you, nobody’s going to recognize you.”
“Most of the people here know Crowbar. I won’t get away with much,” I said. It dawned on me that her daughters weren’t with her. “Where are Vee and Rose?”
“Grayson has them for a minute. Look up,” she said.
I looked up so she could add eyeliner. I was only going to put face paint on, camouflage style like I was out hunting, but Parker was artistically painting my face. Having her this close to me was unnerving. I was already hot wearing the costume, but the nearness of her ignited my blood. “This fake fur prison is going to make the paint run.”
She gave me a look. “Stop whining. You’ll be fine. Unless you run five miles, you’re not going to sweat this off. Trust me. I have children.”
“That doesn’t even make sense.”
“If you had them, you would know that it does.” She looked at the paint stick. “This is what we use. And it will wash off nicely with soap and water. I can’t tell you how many times we’ve dressed up as pirates or jungle animals. Okay. We’re almost done. Purse out your lips and don’t talk,” she said.
She didn’t seem bothered by being in my space. I was glad I’d made myself clear at the dinner party because I wasn’t sure I could behave. She leaned in until her lips were a breath away from mine. I froze out of desperation to feel her lips press against mine. She cupped my chin to keep me still. My body swayed slightly forward as though magnetically drawn to hers, as though the universe had plans for us, and for a moment we kissed. But it wasn’t a kiss. It was a reminder of our youth. I pulled away before it became a part of our future. I was fully prepared to pretend it didn’t even happen.
She pulled me back. “Sutton. I want this.”
Even though my blood pounded and I wanted her to fully kiss me, I stopped her. “This can’t happen. I can’t do this again.”
“But things are different now. Give me a chance to explain things, will you?”
God, those pleading blue eyes always made my knees weak. “Nothing good will come of this.” I was hyper aware that I didn’t say no.
A knock on the door separated us quickly. Emily, one of the trainers, poked her head in. “Oh, I thought maybe you needed some help.”
Parker held up the makeup stick and calmly said, “We’re doing a pretty good job over here.” She stepped away and pointed to me. “What do you think?”
Emily smiled and nodded. “Nailed it. It looks like you got this, Coach.”
I took the opportunity to step farther away from Parker. “I can put on my lip coloring but thank you.”
She respectfully backed away, too, as though it finally sunk in that she had been in my space too long. “Of course.” She gave me a quick up-and-down and smiled. “You look great. You’ll be a big hit with the kids.”
Parker left when Emily did. When she closed the door, I sprawled out in a chair to shake off the nervousness. Crowbar must’ve sensed my mood because he slid off the couch, stretched, and moseyed over to lick my hand. After thirty seconds of trying to understand what just happened, I gave up, knowing I had somewhere to be. I slipped the large dog head into position, careful not to ruin my awesome face paint job, and tapped my leg for Crowbar to follow. I attached a small saddle I made of two plastic pumpkins to Crowbar. He was going to be a hit. I’d been getting emails all week asking if Crowbar would attend the trick-or-treat event. According to Hayley, I was getting thousands of likes for every photo of him she posted. He had a bigger fan base than I did.
When I entered the cafeteria, Brandon saw me and immediately pulled his twins over to meet me. “You look amazing.” Brandon laughed.
I wanted to bark but the kids looked nervous about getting close to either one of us.
“How am I the only one who dressed up?” I asked.
He looked down at his Cheetahs windbreaker and khakis. “What do you mean? I’m a winning coach from the Cheetahs. That’s good enough.”
Everyone else looked professional in their pressed pants and Cheetahs shirts and I couldn’t have felt more awkward and out of place until Bill showed up. He was dressed as Aquaman and gave me a giant side-arm hug.
“At least I can count on Sutton.” His gruff, now hoarse voice sounded hilarious. I couldn’t stop laughing at his attempt to keep his long golden-brown wig from getting caught in his mouth or tripping over his oversized boots. It was the perfect icebreaker.
About half the players who stuck around were dressed up as well. Grayson was dressed in green tights, a green skirt, and a tight green T-shirt. I thought he was the Jolly Green Giant until I overheard him telling people he was Peter Pan. Parker’s costume made more sense now. She was Tinkerbell. Their daughters were dressed completely differently from them. The oldest, Violet, was dressed like Katniss Everdeen and had a small bow and a quiver slung over her tiny shoulder. Rose was dressed like a witch. They ran over to me and asked if they could pet Crowbar. They barely waited for approval before hugging him tightly. Thankfully, he loved children and accepted their awkward hugs and slight fur pulling.
“Be careful. Don’t hurt him,” Parker said.
“You look incredible.” Grayson laughed at us.
I playfully threw a piece of candy at him, ignoring the twist in my stomach at what just happened in my office with his wife. “Laugh all you want. Look at our line. Besides Bill, we’re the next best thing here. Isn’t that right, Crowbar?” He wagged his tail and gave a low woof.
“Good for you for dressing up,” Grayson said. I felt guilty at the easy camaraderie we shared.
“Uncle Matt. You need to come over and meet Crowbar,” Rose said. She adorably dropped the “r” off the end of his name. A nice-looking man kissed Parker on the cheek and knelt to talk to the girls. He had dark, wavy hair and twinkling eyes. I wondered if he was Grayson’s brother because Parker was an only child.
“Are you Coach McCoy?” he asked Crowbar. The girls squealed and laughed.
“No, he’s Crowbar and she’s Coach McCoy.” Violet pointed to me. “It’s a joke.”
He winked at me. I barked at him. He fist-bumped me and grabbed a piece of candy from the table. “Nice to meet you, Coach,” he said.
He wasn’t in costume. He was wearing a sweater, jeans, and chukka boots and had an air about him that screamed money. His hands were manicured and his watch was vintage. Expensive vintage. Maybe Uncle Matt was Grayson’s agent. “Nice to meet you, Matt.”
“Do you mind if I get a few photos with the four of you?” Parker asked. She pointed to her kids, me, and Crowbar. Nobody would recognize me anyway. “That’s fine. Send me a photo. I need to show Hayley that I went through with the costume.”
“I’ll get a picture of just the two of you. Then she can post it.”
I posed with Crowbar. “I’m sure she’ll love that.”
Parker nodded. “You both look incredible.”
“So do you.” I don’t know why I blurted that out. I was trying to keep my cool about the kiss, but I felt even more guilty about it in front of her family. I cleared my throat and looked away. Grayson was deep in conversation with Uncle Matt so he missed our exchange. “Will you take them trick-or-treating in the neighborhood or is this it?” I asked Parker.
“It’s already seven. It’s probably time to get home, take baths, and hide the candy. I want them to get some sleep tonight,” Parker said. She was holding Rose’s hand who sleepily leaned against her. She loved motherhood. I could see it in her eyes and how her children clung to her for strength.
“You’d better go before that one falls asleep.” I didn’t know how to be relaxed around Parker with Grayson at her hip.
She pointed behind them. “Plus, you have quite the line behind us. Hopefully, you have enough candy.”
I waved her off. “I’m sure there’s tons here. What doesn’t get passed out will be sitting in a glass jar in all the coaches’ offices.”
In a surprising move, she squeezed my hand. “Congratulations on your win, Coach.”
“Thanks for your help today.” I didn’t watch them move to the next table. I didn’t even remind her to send me the photo. I knew she wouldn’t forget. I’d hear from her later tonight and the thought gave me a jolt that I couldn’t ignore.
* * *
I was on the phone with Hayley when Parker sent me the photos.
“Send them to me. I can’t believe you didn’t FaceTime me or at least send me a selfie,” she said.
I told her how Parker helped me and it took a solid ten minutes to calm Hayley down and reiterate that we were only friends. I didn’t mention the kiss we shared. I felt too conflicted about it. I knew Hayley would help me sort through my feelings, but I was too guilty to admit what happened.
“Any weirdness from Grayson?”
“Nothing. He barely looked at Parker.”
“That’s odd. He was so attentive the other night.” She paused as she pulled up the photos. “Oh, my God. These pictures are incredible! I’m going to post the one of you and Crowbar, if that’s okay.”
“Parker said you would want to. Do you think people will call me a bitch or a dog or anything?”
“Why don’t I just turn off comments?”
“Yeah, that’s smart.” I couldn’t prevent people from copying and posting it, but they wouldn’t be able to do it on my page.
“Listen, I’m glad you and Parker can share space again. I know it’s hard for you, but I think seeing her again is making it easier to be around her. Plus, your date with the kindergarten teacher will help keep your past in the past.”
I didn’t know how I felt about my upcoming date. I was excited to see Ruby, but Parker kept popping up in my mind, a hundred times stronger after today. “It sucks that Ruby and Parker know each other. Hopefully, that doesn’t complicate things.”
“I stalked Ruby on social media and she is exactly the person you need in your life. She’s cute, loves fun activities like skiing and snowboarding, and she likes beer. I mean, I couldn’t have created a better person for you,” Hayley said.
She stifled a yawn, so I kicked her off the phone. “Go to sleep. You had a long day. I’ll call you after my date.”
“I love you. Good job today.”
We didn’t even talk about my win, and honestly, I didn’t even realize it until just then. “Thanks. I love you, too.”