Present
“Hey, how are you?” I couldn’t tell Hayley anything about what was happening, and I hated it. I knew she would be hurt, but she would understand. It had been ten days since the Moatses dropped their bomb on me, and honestly, Grayson was doing better. An obvious weight had been lifted and he had done a one-eighty on the field. I texted Parker regularly to see how she was doing. I kept my texts short, but with feeling.
“I haven’t heard from you in forever. Are you okay?” Hayley asked.
“I’m good.”
“You’re great! I swear you’re going to the playoffs.” Hayley was always my biggest cheerleader.
I wanted to believe her, but I also didn’t want to jinx us by thinking that far ahead. “I hope so. We still have a lot of work to do. We have five more games until the playoffs and we have to win four out of five.”
Hayley sighed. “Three and two will give you a wildcard. Listen, I called because I wanted to find out what you’re doing for Thanksgiving. Are you able to get away?”
I inwardly groaned. How could I forget about one of the biggest holidays? “Honestly, I don’t know what I’m doing.”
“Well, we would love to have you and your dad and Judy. Or just you, or just them. Somebody to watch the kids, really.” Hayley laughed. “Also, I miss you. I know football season is busy, but I need you.”
I missed her, too, and my mental health needed rejuvenating. “I’ll be there. I’ll call Dad later and invite him as well. I can’t promise I’ll stay all day, but I need to wrestle with some kids.”
“They would love that. And so would I. Are you driving home?”
I clenched the steering wheel tighter. I was on my way to see Parker, but I couldn’t tell Hayley that. “Yeah. Me and Crowbar are going to watch games and fall asleep on the couch.”
“Sounds perfect. Trust me. The boys are driving me bonkers. I’m living vicariously through you for the next ten years,” she said.
“I’ll send you a text when I talk to Dad. Thanks for inviting me.”
“Thanksgiving is for family and friends. You’re always invited. You know that.”
“I love you.” I did and it broke my heart that I couldn’t share a massive part of my life with my best friend right now.
“I love you, too, and I’ll see you soon,” she said.
I hit the end button and a wave of guilt washed over me. I cracked the window for fresh air. What was I doing? Who did I think I was? I wasn’t a professional who should’ve been doling out advice in a very sensitive situation. I was inserting myself because I still cared for Parker. I didn’t want to admit that maybe there was still something between us, but here I was, making a beeline for Parker’s since Grayson sneaked over to his apartment with Matt. It was 9:04 p.m. and like I told Hayley, I should’ve been home watching films, but instead I was in fresh clothes, my hair down, and pulling into Parker’s driveway.
“Hi, come on in.” Parker’s eyes lit up when she saw me.
“How are you doing?”
“You know what? I feel good. I’m at peace.”
She looked incredible. Worn, comfortable jeans hugged her hips and tapered down to black booties. The black V-neck sweater showed a hint of cleavage. I kept my eyes on her face, but my peripheral vision picked up the smooth, creamy skin of her neck and bit of her collarbone. She was sexy without even trying. “That’s good to hear.”
“Come on in.”
I knew they had met with a lawyer, and I was dying to find out how it went, but I didn’t want to ask.
“Can I get you a drink?” she asked. She plucked a wineglass off the table with her slender fingertips and motioned for me to follow her into the kitchen. “This is a merlot.”
I needed a clear head. “No, thanks. I need to be sharp for tomorrow.” I knew that if I started drinking now, I would continue until my excitement of being close to Parker dulled and that would take at least a bottle. I couldn’t afford to drink that much tonight. She handed me a glass of ice water.
“Let’s have a seat in the living room. Are you ready for the game?”
I gave her a look. “Let’s not talk about football. Tell me about your day. You sometimes volunteer at the school. What do you do when you aren’t being a mom or a wife?”
“As much as I love my children, it’s nice to have adult time. I have Pilates on Mondays and Fridays. I have book club on Wednesday nights. The rest of the time I’m either fielding calls for Grayson’s charity or volunteering in the classroom. My life is very simple,” she said.
It was far from that. I had a simple life. “I definitely don’t think it’s that.”
“You’re right. It’s not simple, but it’s going to be soon. We met with the lawyer today.”
“Oh?” I told myself to act only mildly surprised. I knew Grayson left after films today for personal reasons. “How’d that go?”
“It went well. The girls and I will stay here at the house. We’re figuring out custody because we want equal time. I’m sure the sooner we get it done, the happier we’ll all be.”
I wanted to know more, but I had to be delicate about it. “I have so many questions, but I know it’s not my place.”
She finished her glass and kicked off her boots before folding her legs underneath her. “There’s not much to tell. You know everything really.”
“What about you? Why didn’t you put yourself first? I know you said it was because your parents were jerks about it, but that’s a huge sacrifice.”
She ran her fingertips delicately over the cashmere throw she pulled from the back of the sofa to cover her lap. “I felt it was punishment.” That didn’t sound like the Parker I knew.
“For what?”
“For going against my parents, for hurting you, for making bad decisions one after another.”
Her mouth tilted down at the corners. I reached out and touched her hand. “Hey, high school was a long time ago. We were kids on different paths. You’re doing what’s best for yourself and your family. Do you think what happened between us was wrong or that what’s going on with Grayson is wrong?”
She covered my hand with her own and squeezed. “No, of course not. I’m proud of him. I’m even proud of myself for finally seeing what we were doing. I hate that the girls will be affected by this, but it’s the best for our relationship as their parents.”
“What about you? What happens to you?” I didn’t move my hand.
“I’ll still run Grayson’s charities. I’m not worried about me. I want to make sure the girls are good. The lawyer recommended some therapy for all of us to get used to the idea of being a split family.”
“They know and love Uncle Matt, right?”
“They do. So much. And he adores them. Plus his parents love the girls so I know they are going to be loved and well cared for. I’m worried about my parents’ reaction to all of this.”
I clenched my jaw to keep from spouting horrible things about her parents. That was her battle. “What do you think’s going to happen?” I was fearful of the O’Neals. They had money and the power of the church behind them. If nothing else, they could destroy Grayson in the press, which would affect Parker and the girls. “I mean, do you think they would disown you? You’re their only child.”
“I really don’t know. They’ve gotten even more ‘churchy’ over the last few years. Maybe they suspect about Grayson, but they definitely know about me.”
What did that mean? “Know about you how? What do you mean?”
She pulled her hand back and linked her fingers together and rested them gently on her lap. She was always so graceful, even as a teenager. “My sexual identity. I’m tired of trying to fit in a mold that the whole world wants me to fit in. I understand Grayson’s frustration. Only he has it ten times worse because he’s in a sport that doesn’t accept gays.”
“Hopefully, that’s changing. I think if Grayson comes out to the world on his terms and not in a way that has him scrambling around, it will help other players. Homophobia exists everywhere, but the younger generation is more tolerant.”
She leaned her head back on the couch and sighed. “You’ve always been so strong and proud. I always envied your life. Your dad was so supportive. And your friends. You’re even still friends with guys you played football with.”
“I can’t believe that some of your cheer friends haven’t reached out on social media to use you.” I smiled at her to let her know I was joking.
She laughed. It made my stomach quiver again. “I finally had to block Missy because she was incessant. I guess she’s still in Oak Grove. She’s been married twice and has at least one child. She wanted more of my time than I could give her. And all the perks that football wives got.”
I crinkled my nose. “What kind of perks do you get?”
Another laugh. Another quiver. “I’m sure you get a lot of products that companies want you to endorse.”
“I never responded to any of my emails. I know we have a whole public relations team that fields stuff like that to our agents, but I always delete them.” It never dawned on me that my voice would be heard. Now that I was the first at something, the world would be listening. “Think of all the macaroni and cheese commercials I could be doing.”
“That’s your social responsibility? Mac and cheese commercials?”
I pretended to be shocked. “We all eat it. Why wouldn’t I promote something so All-American?” This entire exchange was cheesy, pun intended, but I could see her shoulders relax and the worry lines around her mouth and forehead soften.
“My girls love it. And there are healthy options.”
“Or maybe I should work with a publishing company so I get free books donated to my charity.”
She sat up straight so fast that I leaned back. “You should ask your agent to look into that.”
“I should answer my agent’s calls more. I’m sure he fields a lot of requests. I’ve been spread so thin this year that it’s impossible to pick and choose. I need sleep, you know.” I finished my water. “It’s getting late. I should go.” I didn’t know if Grayson was coming home tonight and I felt guilty for being here. I darted to the kitchen and put my glass in the sink. I felt Parker’s body heat before I even turned around.
“Sutton.”
The way she said it made my weakened resolve fall apart. I pressed my palms against the counter for a moment to gather any strength I could before I turned to face her. Her eyes always told the truth when her guard was down. The last sixteen years weren’t easy on her. I hated that there was a part of me that hoped she was suffering. The woman in front of me was in agony.
I pulled her close and ran my fingertip along her jaw. She was still my first love. Still the woman I wanted most in this world. I could tell she was holding her breath, waiting for me to decide. The universe brought us together once and fate stepped in the second time.
“Parker.”
A slight whimper escaped her parted lips as she cupped my face in her hands and brought my mouth down to hers. The first kiss was tender and soft as we adjusted to one another. She was more assertive now. It was a massive turn-on.
“I want you. It’s always been you,” she whispered when we broke apart for air.
Our kiss went from gentle to explosive in the span of fifteen seconds. I couldn’t get close enough. Not only did I knock my walls down, but I kicked them out of the way to get to her. She felt so familiar in my arms, but I noticed subtle differences as well. Her breasts were fuller, her hips had widened, but her waist was still small and her skin so smooth. I kissed her neck and reached down to unlatch the button of her jeans. I was moving too fast after practically giving her a PowerPoint presentation of the reasons why we had to wait.
Instead, I slid my hand under her sweater and smiled at her body heat. I had touched dozens of women in my life, but I had Parker’s body memorized. The small mole on her ribcage, the way chill bumps followed my touch like it was a race to get to the sensitive spots first, and the way she bit her bottom lip when my hand got closer to her breast. She smelled like sweet orange blossom and a hint of vanilla. I slid both hands down the curve of her lower back, into the band of her jeans, and squeezed her ass. I pulled her flush against me, wishing our clothes were off and we were somewhere private. I wasn’t the shy teenager who worried if I was doing something wrong anymore. Parker’s body squirmed against me for friction and her small, breathless moans made every part of my body hum with desire and need. I was two seconds from pulling her into the study when a rapid, but low, insistent knock on the front door interrupted us.
“Why aren’t they answering the door?” a man’s voice asked.
Parker put her hand on her chest and stared at me in alarm. My imagination exploded. Grayson was in a wreck, or he got pulled over. Or it was Bill who had found out about Grayson and my involvement in his marriage. To be fair, other coaches had hidden worse behavior in the past. I followed Parker to the door. She opened it.
“You never answered your phone. We’ve been calling all night,” a woman said.
Fuck my life. The O’Neals stood in the doorway with suitcases in hand. I had no choice but to stand there and wait until the recognition hit them. Ginger O’Neal did not disappoint. Her lips curled back in a sneer. If I didn’t have the upper hand of having recognized her first, I would have cowered.
“Hello, Ginger. Hello, Samuel.” I grinned like the cat who ate the canary and leaned my shoulder against the wall as though I belonged there.
“What is she doing here? I thought she was out of your life, Parker,” Ginger said.
How did they not know I was the offensive coordinator for the team their son-in-law played for? The announcers said my name all the time during games. “I coach her husband now.” I returned her sneer with a smirk. She scoffed, huffed, and smacked her husband in the chest.
“Do something, Samuel.”
“Nobody’s doing anything, Mother. Sutton is a part of our lives now. She’s our friend, Grayson’s coach, and belongs here just as much as you do,” Parker said.
“It’s so good to see you both again after all these years. You look well.” I wanted to bolt, but I didn’t want them to control my actions anymore. I was an adult and everything Parker said was true. Maybe we were more than friends after what just happened a minute ago, but they didn’t need to know that.
Parker gently pushed me out of their way. “Mom. Dad. Come in. What are you doing here? We weren’t expecting you until the weekend.”
“Obviously.” Ginger scoffed.
I pulled myself up to my full height and looked down at them. Funny how they used to scare the shit out of me. “I was just on my way out. Good night, Parker. I’ll see you later.”
“Bye, Sutton. I’ll see you soon.” Parker’s voice was a full octave higher.
I could feel their stare boring into my back as I walked to my car. “We tried calling but apparently you were busy. Why is she here? Where’s Grayson?” Ginger asked.
I didn’t hear Parker’s answer as I shut the car door. I got out of the driveway as fast as I could without burning rubber. I called Grayson. “Sorry to interrupt, but your in-laws just showed up, presumably unannounced.”
“Shit. They’re early. They offered to come up for Thanksgiving. I didn’t know Parker changed the date.”
“She didn’t. She was very surprised they were there. You might want to head home.”
He sighed. “Thanks for the heads up.”
“Only a little bit longer.” I disconnected the call and wondered if I was going to be in trouble from the league or the team for orchestrating this arrangement. My contract was for two years so even if they fired me, they had to pay me. But if they fired me, no other team would touch me.
Ten minutes later, I pulled into my driveway. The weariness of the day finally hit. Crowbar slid off the couch to greet me. I let him out one last time and crawled into bed. My limbs felt heavy. I crawled into bed with Parker on my mind, but sleep overtook me before I could play out any scenario that could have happened before her parents showed up.