My British accent finally won me a friend! Maybe things will turn around, or maybe at the very least, I won’t feel so out of place all the time. It’s getting old, D.
In the months after my dad left, the divide between La Jolla and Holmes Chapel felt greater than ever before. Dad didn’t call or write, and I didn’t feel inclined to reach out to him either. For all I knew, he hadn’t gone back home at all but was wandering around town and I might bump into him when I least expected at the grocery store or gas station. I constantly looked over my shoulder, hoping to see him. I imagined telling him off and begging him to come home. I’d show him pictures of my mum curled up in her bed, room dark and stifling. He hadn’t been pleasant when he was around, but anything had to be better than this. In trying to keep my mother from crying nonstop, adjusting to being in a new country, and feeling behind in my schoolwork…I was exhausted.
Gemma left for school in New York, so Jaxson’s house felt weird too, without Gemma’s sarcastic comments flying all the time. It was too much change. Too many beginnings for everyone else felt like endings for me.
The silver lining was that I saw Jaxson most days and I also made a new friend. Tyra was in three of my classes and we had lunch together—I first met her at lunch when she was in front of me in line. She groaned when she saw the coconut cream pie they were serving.
“I am destined to be a plus-size model,” she said. She swiped a few dreadlocks out of her eyes with her long, bright purple fingernail and turned to me. “Have you tried this pie yet? It’s the best thing they serve. Trust me.”
“I’ve been trying to avoid it,” I admitted, reluctantly taking a piece. She looked pretty great to me. If she was plus-size, I was extra plus-plus. Most of the girls at my school were twigs. Still, I couldn’t resist a good pie. “It’s that scrummy, huh?”
“Scrummy? Is that what you said?” She looked at me over her shoulder.
“Uh…delicious?” I’d have to remember to strike scrummy from my American vocabulary.
“Scrummy. I like that.” She smiled. “But it’s even better than that,” she moaned, dipping her finger into the creamy filling before moving forward. “I’m Tyra. I’ve seen you around. I’d kill for an accent like yours.”
I flushed. “Thank you. Usually the noses are curling up before I have two words out…it’s like I’m speaking another language.”
She laughed. “The people at this school don’t think anyone else exists out of these walls and maybe the beach down the street. My aunt and I moved here last year from Riverside. It’s two hours away at most and when I tell someone where I moved from, they’re like, ‘Never heard of it.’” She shook her head. “Livin’ in their own little world.”
I didn’t tell her I’d never heard of Riverside either—I didn’t think that would win me any points—but I made a mental note to look it up later that night. Tyra motioned for me to follow her and sat down at the closest table. She chatted throughout lunch. It was nice to have someone to listen to. She asked questions here and there too, but she was so entertaining, I preferred listening to her talk.
When I took a bite of the pie, she stopped talking and stared at me. “Well?” She lifted an eyebrow.
I nodded. “Even better.”
“Told you,” she said.
That afternoon Tyra and I walked out of class together. We’d discovered our lockers were across from each other after lunch, so we headed in that direction. When I got closer, I noticed Jaxson was leaning on my locker and started grinning.
“I’ll expect you to fill me in on that the next time I see you,” Tyra said, giving me her direct look that suggested no arguments. “Again…even better than scrummy. See ya later.”
I waved and excitedly walked up to Jaxson. “Made a friend finally,” I told him.
“You’d have lots of friends if you’d talk to everyone like you talk to me,” he said.
“I like Derek,” I said. “He’s easy to talk to.”
Sometimes Derek came over to say hi during the breaks at practice. It had shocked me the first time he did it, but I soon realized he needed a break from the girls going on over Jaxson. He claimed they were so annoying. We were in agreement there.
Jaxson frowned, and I turned to my locker.
“Heather’s your friend…and Elle, Danielle, Giselle…Raquel…” He rattled off a list of all the girls that hung on his every word.
I had my head in my locker and rolled my eyes. I wasn’t going to spell it out for him, but I had a feeling they would act like I didn’t exist if it weren’t for him. Heather tried a little harder to be nice to me, but I suspected it was because she liked Jaxson the most. A couple of the girls were my age, but the rest of them were in classes with Jaxson or knew him from football. They were on the cheering squad and since Jaxson had been playing really well lately, their interest in him had escalated. They all had long, flat-ironed hair and size zero bodies. I felt like their eyes circled in on my lumps and frizzy hair every time I was around them.
“I’ll find my own friends, thank you,” I muttered.
“What?” he asked, tapping my shoulder.
I shook my head. “Nothing.”
“Hey, after practice, a bunch of us are doing homework at my house. Stick around and walk with us.”
I finished putting my books in my backpack and shut the locker door. Jaxson looked down at me, grinning expectantly. I leaned my head over on the lockers and groaned inwardly. As much as I didn’t want to hang out with a bunch of his groupies, the thought of him hanging out with them without me was even worse.
“Fine,” I agreed, sighing. “But I really have to get my homework done…”
“I’ll even help you finish,” he promised.
He put his arm around my shoulder and we walked toward the field. I took my spot where I usually waited for him and pretended to read/not watch him practice.
Heather and the rhyming name girls practiced their routine and cheered extra hard every time Jaxson did anything. I wondered who would be the first to fight over him.
When practice finished up, I walked down the steps of the bleachers and sat on the row behind where the girls practiced. Belle looked back at me and elbowed Danielle. She whispered something and they turned and looked at me again, laughing.
My face grew hot and I moved closer to the edge of my seat, wishing I could disappear but not wanting to move while they were watching me. As soon as they looked away, I gathered my things and stood up to get out of there.
“Hey, don’t let those girls get to you,” Derek said. He bent down and picked up the book I’d dropped. “You’re classier than th—”
Heather came up then and put her hand on Derek’s arm. “Great job out there today,” she cooed and I could see him physically melt, his shoulders going limp before he came to his senses again and straightened.
“Why, thank you,” he said, grinning down at her.
He walked off with her still beaming up at him, and I thought I was forgotten until Heather turned around and waved at me over her shoulder.
“See ya, Mira.” She lifted a brow and gave me a smug smile, almost as if challenging me, but the next second I thought I’d imagined it.
I was home when Jaxson called.
“Where are you?” he asked before I even said hello.
“I’m not feeling well,” I told him. “Have fun, though.”
“What’s wrong?”
He sounded so concerned that I felt bad for lying to him.
“I’ll be fine. I just need to lie down. No worries…” My voice trailed off.
“Okay, I’ll call you later. Get better. I want to have everyone come over on Friday night and can’t do it without you.”
“Jaxson, I’ve gotta go. Sorry.” I hung up on him and fell back on my bed, wishing for the days when it was just the two of us.
He didn’t call that night and I was driven to school instead of walking the next morning, so I didn’t see him until the afternoon. He looked relieved when he saw me.
“Sorry, it was too late to call when everyone left. You feeling better?”
I nodded.
“You look fine,” he said. A guy bumped his arm and he nodded. “Hey, Max.” He looked back at me and grinned. “So this party tomorrow night…everyone’s coming. You can’t miss it. My mom said everyone could stay until midnight.” His eyes widened to match mine. “I know. I can’t believe it either. She likes everyone coming to our house, she says…so she can keep tabs on me.” He shrugged again and I noticed how American he seemed.
“You hardly sound British anymore,” I told him.
His eyebrows lowered in the middle. “Impossible. I get made fun of every day for my accent.”
“You do? I thought I was the only one.” I laughed.
“We’ll never get rid of it, okay? We’re the only ones who sound proper around here,” he teased.
I leaned my head on his shoulder and smiled. “I’ve missed you,” I said.
“Missed you too,” he said, not realizing I meant more than yesterday’s homework session.
Heather walked by and stopped when she saw us. “Group hug,” she said, putting her arms around us.
Jaxson smiled at her when we all let go. “C’mon, I’ve gotta get to practice,” he said.
“I’m going to head home,” I said quietly. “Too much homework.”
A flicker of hurt crossed his eyes, but it quickly faded. “Promise you’ll come tomorrow night.”
“I’ll try.”
But the next night, when it was time for me to make a decision about going to Jaxson’s, I thought of all those girls surrounding him, how out of place I would feel, my conflicting thoughts about Heather…and instead, I made a double batch of chocolate chip cookies and watched the Twilight movies until I fell asleep. I spent the first four hours checking my phone to see if Jaxson would call, but he never did.