Chapter 20

~Nicki~

 

I open my eyes to darkness. I feel pillows under my head, a duvet wrapped around me and I know I’m in bed.

“Morning, sleepy head.”

It’s John’s voice.

I blink hard to adjust to the dark. He’s sitting beside me on top of the covers, fully dressed. I scan the room and realize that I’m actually in his bedroom, not my own. It takes me a moment to remember how I got here. Oh shit. Parts of last night come flooding back to me like an embarrassing nightmare.

“My head doesn’t hurt,” I tell him.

“After you stopped throwing up, I made you drink a gallon of water. And before you fell asleep, I gave you some quality painkillers.”

“Thanks. I’m…sorry.”

He moves closer and strokes my hair gently. “Don’t worry about it.”

I rub my face tiredly. “What time is it?”

“Early afternoon.”

“What? Why is it so dark?”

“It’s just the bedroom. I wanted you to sleep as long as possible. The longer you slept, the better you’d feel.”

I smile. “You’re so sweet.”

He grins. “Only for you, sweetheart.”

I haul myself up into a sitting position. That’s when I realize I’m wearing one of his t-shirts. My favorite one—a collector’s edition shirt from Bruce Springsteen’s Born to Run tour. My favorite songwriter of all time.

“Aww,” I say, gesturing to the shirt.

“I thought that’d make you happy.”

“So you undressed me, huh?”

He grins. “Not exactly.”

“What does that mean?”

“You treated me to a little strip show when we got back here.”

“What?” I sputter, shocked at this news.

“Don’t worry, I kept my eyes off you.” He winks slyly as he adds, “Mostly.”

“Oh my God,” I breathe, burying my face in my hands. And that’s when the rest of the night comes back to me. The Axel parts. The last thing I remember is him asking me if I wanted to come up to his bedroom for some peace and quiet. “No, no, no,” I murmur.

“What, Nicki?”

I remove my hands from my face and force myself to look at him. I swallow hard and ask, “Did Axel—did we—?”

“No,” he growls. “No you didn’t.”

“But I don’t remember. He asked me up to his room…he didn’t touch me because I was drunk, right?”

I can tell by the look on John’s face that it wasn’t the case.

“Let’s just say that the only thing that stopped him was my fist.”

I can’t contain my absolute relief and I fling my arms around him. “Thank you. I don’t know what I would have done if he’d—if we’d—”

“I would never let that happen,” he says, cutting me off. “Never, Nicki,” he growls, vehemently.

“It’s not your job, though. I shouldn’t have put myself in that position. I’m so sorry you had to do that. I’m sorry, John. I swear it won’t happen again.”

“I agree. It was stupid getting that drunk around a bunch of frat guys. But I know you were upset. You weren’t yourself. Besides, between you, me, Mitch and Chloe, you’ve made the fewest mistakes. So, I’ll give you this one.”

We both laugh.

“Do me a favor though?”

“Anything.”

“Never wear that outfit you were wearing last night again.”

I pull back and eye him in surprise. “It wasn’t that bad.”

“It was for you. I hated it.”

At first I thought he was joking, but I can tell by his tone that he’s definitely not. Why is he being so insane over some outfit I was wearing? Wow, that’s majorly possessive. Boyfriend possessive.

“John?”

He straddles me over the covers and leans into me, his eyes locking with mine as he says, “I know you’ve been experimenting lately with…him…but it ends now. As you know now from last night, he’s dangerous. You didn’t believe me. But I hope it’s clear now that I wasn’t lying. He’s an asshole. He was manipulating you.”

“I—”

He presses his finger to my lips, silencing me. “You, sweetheart, are special. You don’t belong with an ass like him. It upsets me that you didn’t see that; that you let him inside your head. You don’t need to lose yourself to experience what you want to. You got me?”

I nod.

“Good. I don’t want any other man laying his fucking hands on you.” He looks away as though just saying the words is causing him pain. He climbs off the bed and throws his hands in the air as his pain turns to anger in typical John fashion and he yells, “You’re smart, Nicki. Independent. A go-getter. Your own person. You’re better than that! Better than him! You’re a fucking angel and he’s worth less than the goddamn devil! I can’t…” he runs his fingers through his hair and shakes his head, “…I just can’t understand why you let him touch you! Last night I saw you…on his bed…crying like that. Terrified. It…it nearly killed me!”

“I’m sorry,” I choke out.

He pounces on me, making me jump in surprise.

“No, I’m sorry, Nicki. It’s all my fault. I pushed you away. All these concerns were running through my head: ruining our friendship; the band breaking up. But…the truth is….” he tucks a loose strand of hair gently behind my right ear and gazes at me, his eyes so intense it’s like they’re trying to bore right through mine, “…I was just making excuses. I was scared. You’re not just some girl to me. You’re my best friend. But all this shit that’s been happening; it made me realize that…I want you. I want you to be mine.”

I’m speechless. For one thing, I’m not used to seeing John emotional like this.

“Nicki?”

Oh shit. I realize I’ve been sitting here just staring at him like a fool.

“Can you throw me a bone here?” he says, tickling the side of my neck to get my attention.

I giggle and bat his hand away. “You—John Kingston—are asking me to be your girlfriend?”

“Yeah. What’s funny about that?” he asks off the wide grin plastered on my face.

“Well, have you ever had one before? Cuz, in the four years that I’ve known you—”

He silences me with a chaste kiss to my forehead. “I’m ready,” he tells me. “Are you?”

“Yes,” I say. “Yes, I am.” I throw my arms around him, squeezing him tightly. He grunts in pain and I pull back instantly. “What is it? You’re hurt?”

“It’s nothing.”

My eyes narrow with suspicion. “Turn the light on.”

“Nicki, it’s fine.”

“John,” I press. “Light.”

He climbs off me and crosses to the bedroom door. He flips the light switch and then turns back to me nervously. Immediately, I see why. He’s been in one hell of a fight. His face is messed up badly. He lifts his shirt and shows me his abs. I cringe at the stark bruising.

“Is that from last night? Axel did this to you?” I ask with disbelief. How? Axel is…well, he’s a pussy. And John is a trained fighter.

John scoffs. “Please. Give me the credit I deserve. He brought along two guys a couple of days ago. They jumped me in the parking lot downstairs.”

“What?” I scramble off the bed. “Oh my God! Why the hell didn’t you tell me?”

He breaks eye contact and looks away uneasily. “I didn’t want you to see me like this, cuz of the past.”

I take his hands in mine and he looks down at me. “You don’t need to hide things from me. I can handle more than you give me credit for. Plus, at the gym, I see a lot of this crap. Right?”

“This isn’t the same as what you see in a controlled fight.”

I roll my eyes. “I’m not as fragile as you think. You should’ve told me. I could’ve helped.”

“I had Mitch. It was fine. I’m fine.”

I pull away and shake my head. “You’re still healing. You’re not fine yet.”

“Nicki—”

“Did you report it?”

He looks at me like I just told him the sky is green or something. “No. It was retaliation for what I did to him at the gym. It’s over. Let it go. I have.”

“What about last night?”

“What about it?”

“Well, tell me what you did to get me out of there. You already alluded to punching him. How bad was it?”

He waves his hand dismissively. “It was nothing. Just a warning punch. I didn’t put my full weight into it.”

“Really?” I ask, skeptical. I know what John gets like when he loses his temper.

“Yeah. Mitch and Chloe were around. I wasn’t really alone with him, so how much damage could I have really done, right?”

Shit. I can’t tell if he’s lying. This is odd. I can normally see right through him. If he is lying then he’s practiced this little spiel of his, anticipating my inquisition. And so, I let it go…for now.

“All right.”

He smiles and pulls me against him. “Judging by the way you jumped out of bed there, you’re feeling better. Are you up for going out?”

“Out?”

“Yeah. I wanna take you out today.”

“Like, on a date?” I ask, pulling back to look at him.

His eyes sparkle down at me and he smiles excitedly. “Yeah, a date.”

“Absolutely,” I say, grinning like an idiot. “Let’s do it!”