Tyler got a regular gig creating a light show on Tuesday nights at a dance club in Hollywood. Billed as Too Much Tuesdays, it was part rave, part dance club, part psychedelic art show, and part underground hideout for people who wanted to get really high on a school night. We had gone there a few times before Tyler got the gig, and I thought it was crazy good fun. It was set in a cavernous old warehouse in the dark, little-trafficked, decidedly uncommercial, and unhip east part of Sunset Boulevard. Tyler worked out of a small space off the stage.
One particular night, when Tyler’s little area became too claustrophobic for me, I wandered into the main area and ran into Stephanie, who I knew from Gregg Araki’s movie Nowhere. Stephanie had been in the Geoff and Franny circle. She had, in fact, seen them recently in the store where she worked on Melrose Avenue, an eclectic marketplace where artisans, crafters, and designers rented booths and sold their wares.
She was launching her own fashion line and invited me to be a part of the photoshoot. The next weekend, Gabby and I spent the day at Stephanie’s house, which she shared with her boyfriend, Shawn, and two cats, Sam and Tazman. We tried on the cute little skirts and crop tops that Stephanie had hand cut and patterned herself. She was really into fun and funky fabrics, matching two-piece suits, and incorporating groovy mushrooms and cute aliens into the designs. Everything was adorable.
She reminded me of my old friend Nicole and actually became like a sister to me. Because she was a little older than me, people occasionally asked if she was my mother, which she fucking hated. I thought it was hysterical. I got into the habit of stopping by her store to smoke, hang, and talk. I also dropped by her house when I needed help preparing for auditions. Pretty soon I didn’t have reasons for hanging out with Stephanie and Shawn. Whenever I needed a break from Tyler or just a place to roost, I showed up. Their home and their friendship were comfortable and safe, the refuge I needed.
One night, after we had eaten dinner together, we watched some TV show and I caught myself laughing at the jokes. I was doing something most people took for granted. I was relaxing in front of the TV and enjoying myself.
For that little bit, I felt almost normal.