SKILL 6
Independence
Independence is the ability to think for oneself and not be unduly influenced by the thoughts, desires, and emotions of others. It does not mean that one is completely insensitive to the needs of other people or to societal mores. It means a person is able to sift through others’ input and expectations, access his or her own beliefs and values, then reach conclusions and take actions that make sense for his or her own life.
The degree of independence considered appropriate and how it is expressed are influenced by culture. Eastern societies value group process above individual needs, while Western cultures have a higher tendency toward independence. The timeless American icon, the cowboy, is the quintessential figure of independence.
To highlight the desirability of independence, the Star Trek: Next Generation television series created an alien society called the Borg. Each seemingly separate being was neurally connected to all of the others, and they operated with one mind. The concept was called the “hive mind.” The power of the Borg archetype was that their complete and utter lack of independence was repulsive to the audience’s Western way of thinking. Thus, it reaffirmed the Western commitment to independence.
Independence often requires courage, because a person’s actions may set him or her apart from the group and raise visibility. It can be difficult to think and act independently of others. The term “groupthink” conveys the concept of conforming to the values and ethics of others. As the polar opposite of independence, groupthink does not allow for individuality.
Webster’s defines independent as “(1) not subject to control by others: not subordinate; not affiliated with or integrated into a larger controlling unit” (1993).
WHY SHOULD WE CARE ABOUT INDEPENDENCE?
Independence is the ability to stand on one’s own two feet and trust one’s own judgment. It reflects self-confidence and the willingness to take risks. Independence is a key leadership trait that can enhance effectiveness whether one is the leader of a global company, supervisor of a small team, a parent, volunteer with a community organization, or the leader of his or her life.
Independence is important in a team environment, as long as it is expressed with sensitivity to the group process and is applied with a collaborative spirit. One is valued as a team member when he or she is able to take initiative to get things done while including others and contributing to the collective efforts of the group.
HOW CAN WE BUILD INDEPENDENCE?
Notice when and where in your life you are reluctant to exercise your independence. Is it in all situations or in certain circumstances with specific people? Explore what it is that makes you uncomfortable asserting your independence. Are you concerned that people will not think you’re “nice”? Will others be angry? Will someone challenge your position or conclusion? Ask these same questions of your client(s).
Assess the risk of acting independently. If there is more to be gained (self-respect, confidence, and improved teamwork) by asserting independence, then map out a step-by-step plan to promote its development. If you stick with the plan, you will find that you are facing your fears about being independent and increasing your capabilities. The same can happen for your client(s) as you guide them in this direction.
THE JOY OF INDEPENDENCE
Remember riding your first two-wheeled bike:
- At first it had training wheels, and then they were removed.
- You were left with just the two wheels and your parent holding the back of your seat while you pedaled.
- Finally, you experienced the freedom of doing it all by yourself. What a rush!!
Share this with your client and ask whether his or her confidence soared after that accomplishment.
A person who uses independence effectively will have the satisfaction of knowing that he or she acts according to his or her sense of ethics and values and resists the pressure to conform in an unhealthy way. These people are not just puppets on a string. Each time a person stays true to his or her beliefs and intuition, the independence response is fortified. When the tough situations arise, he or she will have the gumption to face the challenges presented.
STAR PERFORMERMahatma Gandhi was a British barrister who fought for civil liberties and freedom in South Africa and in his native India. He followed his own sense of ethics and acted independently of societal expectations. His lifelong struggle was against the prejudices of creed, caste, and race. He eschewed violence and rose to prominence in the social arena on a platform of individual resistance and non-cooperation. “Gandhi had a rare combination of readiness to resist wrong and capacity to love his opponents which baffled his enemies and compelled their admiration” (www.MKGandhi.com, 2003). He was the galvanizing force that freed India from British rule.
REEL PERFORMERIn The Matrix we see a good example of independence in Neo (Keanu Reeves), a software techie by day and computer hacker by night. Morpheus (Laurence Fishburne) reveals the dark truth about the world—humans are the slaves of the machines they created. The humans live in pods, where their energy is harvested to run the machines. They do not resist because the machines have deluded them into thinking they live in a gleaming metropolis, when in reality they live in a virtual world, the matrix.
Neo rebels against the conventional wisdom of the matrix and fights for freedom and truth. The people in the matrix were ignorantly blissful, while the rebels faced the harsh reality. Opting for independence makes his life enormously harder, but it gives Neo a conscious life with real meaning and consequence in place of his former unconscious dream.
In Norma Rae, Sally Field plays a young single mother who works in an Alabama textile mill. Distaste for the deplorable conditions of the work environment and exposure to Reuben (Ron Leibman), a dedicated New York lawyer, fuels her campaign to unionize her company. This is a potentially dangerous course of action for her. The safe route is to maintain the status quo, but her fierce independence drives her to improve conditions for herself and her co-workers, even those who oppose her.