EXERCISE 1.2

Self-Regard

Of Thine Own Self Be Aware

Purpose

To expand recognition of the process for building self-regard.

image Thumbnail

45 minutes to 2 hours

The facilitator will create a reflective process by having participants respond to a list of questions while they are given time in a quiet environment for self-reflection, followed by discussion on what is learned. There must be a high level of trust before this exercise can be shared productively among team members.

Outcome

Begin drafting a powerful map for initiating a self-exploration process that over time will build healthier positive self-regard.

Audience

Facilitator Competencies imageimage

Moderate to Advanced

Materials

Time Matrix

Activity Estimated Time
Brief background on self-regard 5–10 minutes
Self-reflection and responding to questions 30–60 minutes
Group debriefing 10 minutes per member
Total 45 minutes to 2 hours

Instructions

1. Briefly explain self-regard and discuss the intent of the exercise, which is to build awareness of self-regard and develop it by adding something of real value to participants’ lives.

2. Read aloud (or to one’s self if this is applied as an individual exercise):

“In a quiet space of self-reflection, get in touch with something you want in your life. It should be something significant, meaningful, and important, not necessarily an object, although it can be. Humans tend to use objects as symbols or placeholders for values that are actually more abstract. Someone might say, for instance, ‘I want a new boat for water skiing,’ when actually he wants the feelings of importance, success, and power he associates with people who have new ski boats. Merely getting the boat may or may not bring the feelings sought.

“In this exercise you will set a goal to feel more congruent and worthy in some aspect of your life (work, family, personal, etc.) by achieving the goal you have just identified. The process of fully accomplishing it will naturally take a more extended period of time beyond this exercise, during which you will practice new behaviors, attitudes, and expectations. The scope of this exercise is to focus on clearly defining what those new conditions will need to be, how you will be able to recognize them, and how you will motivate yourself to persist in your efforts to incorporate them.”

3. Distribute the handout, pens, and extra paper and instruct participants to take thirty minutes for self-reflection and consideration of the questions on the worksheet, then write down the answers. Emphasize that this is a personal exercise and the answers are only for themselves. Encourage the participants to be honest with themselves.

4. Conduct a group debriefing and encourage the participants to make a commitment to continue the learning from this exercise. Note: Participants should not be asked to share personal matters in a team setting unless the team is well integrated and a proven foundation of trust exists. You can still ask questions like: Was this an enjoyable exercise? Why or why not? What is the value of this kind of exercise? What sorts of questions or insights did it generate for you?

OF THINE OWN SELF BE AWARE HANDOUT image

Answer the following questions in detail. Use as much extra paper as you need. This is confidential—for you alone.

1. What is something I want to accomplish in my life that, when achieved, will lead me to feel really good about myself?

image

2. How will I have to think about myself and my life differently to accomplish this goal?

image

3. What feelings about my life and myself will have to change for me to accomplish this goal?

image

4. How will I have to act differently?

image

5. What has kept me from thinking and feeling and acting in these ways up to this point?