EXERCISE 6.3
Independence
Solitary Effort
Purpose
To have participants experiment with increasing their independence by doing some activities alone that they usually do with others.
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20 minutes
To create the feeling of being independent, participants select an activity to do alone from a list of activities they usually do, and prefer to do, with others. In the session, they fully visualize and act out mentally what it would be like to do the activity alone. To achieve the desired level of independence, they commit to put into practice in their lives what they visualized in the simulation.
Outcomes
- Develop a method to support you in acting more independently in the world
- Increase your confidence in your ability to interact effectively when you are alone
Audience
- Intact team
- Unaffiliated group
- Individual working with a coach
Facilitator Competencies 
Easy
Materials
- Solitary Effort Handout
- Pens
Time Matrix
| Activity | Estimated Time |
| List activities and select one | 5 minutes |
| Visualization | 10 minutes |
| Debriefing | 5 minutes |
| Total Time | 20 minutes |
Instructions
1. Distribute copies of the Solitary Effort Handout and pens and review the handout with the group (or individual).
2. Ask everyone to complete Steps 1 and 2.
3. Have them visualize what it is like to do their selected activities alone. Ask them to close their eyes and take four deep, slow breaths. While their eyes are closed, read them the instructions in Step 3 of the handout. Play soft music in the background, such as the Largo CD from the Relax with the Classics® series (Various Artists, 1987). Follow copyright laws for playing recorded music.
4. Debrief the individual or team with the following questions:
- Were you able to picture yourself performing the activity?
- Did you feel some of the anxiety you might feel if you were really doing it?
- Did you increase your comfort with the idea of doing it alone?
5. Ask them to choose a time in the next two weeks when they will actually do this activity alone. Advise them to take a little notebook or some 3-by-5 cards and jot down notes about their experiences.
6. If you are able to meet again, schedule a time to meet in two weeks to discuss how participants felt doing the chosen activity alone.
1. List activities you usually do, and prefer to do, with others. These are activities that take place away from home.
2. Select from the list above one activity you will do alone in the next two weeks.
3. Visualize yourself doing this activity alone. Imagine each of the steps from when you begin to get ready until after you return home. Begin by picturing yourself:
- At home just before the activity.
What are you wearing?
What are you feeling?
If you are feeling anxious about doing this alone, imagine taking someone with you who makes you feel more comfortable and secure.
- Approaching this activity. For example, maybe you see yourself driving to the location and/or walking up to where the activity takes place. Notice the soundscape throughout your imagined adventure. Is there music playing in the car? Do you hear people’s voices? How loud or close are they? What are they saying?
- Starting the activity. If you feel stressed, take a few deep breaths and picture yourself smiling and confident.
- Completing the activity.
- Leaving the activity and returning home—still smiling and confident.
- Returning home safely.