EXERCISE 10.1

Problem Solving

When Problems Become Conflicts

Purpose

To understand the use of emotions at the individual and team levels to positively influence problem solving when the situation escalates to conflict.

image Thumbnail

65 minutes

Participants first evaluate problems they have been involved with that escalated into conflict. They identify the positive and negative emotions that were involved in the situation at the individual and team levels. In small groups they consider the individual skills of the EQ-i2.0 and TESI to identify the skills most useful for responding effectively to conflicts. Additional time for taking the assessments in advance of approximately thirty minutes for facilitator and thirty per participant. (Different skills from other assessments can be substituted.)

Outcomes

Audience

Facilitator Competencies image

Advanced

Materials

Time Matrix

Activity Estimated Time
Discuss instances of problem solving escalating to conflict 15 minutes
Distribute handout with list of EQ-i2.0 and TESI skills and work in small groups of 3 or 4 to address points on handout 30 minutes
Come together and discuss as a whole 20 minutes (could be more depending on number of groups)
Optional: Ask participants to take EQ-i and TESI in advance 30 minutes your time;
30 minutes per participant; potentially 60 minutes more per person if a private debriefing on the EQ-i results will be provided for each person
Note: Certification is required to use either of these assessments. You should also consider adding in a one-hour debriefing in advance on the EQ-i results for each person individually. Be sure that each person knows he or she will receive the EQ-i results confidentially.
Total Time 65 minutes

Instructions

1. Lead a discussion about problem-solving situations that turned into conflicts because something was avoided or not handled effectively. Using practical examples from your team, group, or coachee, guide your participants to evaluate their examples, seeking to understand interactions at the individual and the team level:

2. With this awareness of emotions, problem solving, and conflict resolution in mind, show them a list of the individual skills addressed as a part of the EQ-i2.0 and the team skills addressed by the TESI. Ask them to consider which skills are called upon to accomplish effective problem solving, especially when the situation has escalated to conflict. Give them the When Problems Become Conflicts Handout and ask them to work in small groups to identify the key emotional intelligence skills that support problem solving and conflict resolution and ask them to identify one or two reasons why they selected each skill. Also ask them to write one or two ways to apply each skill. Give each group a flip-chart page and markers and ask them to write their answers on the page to present to the full group when they come back together. (If you are using this in an individual coaching session, have your coachee write the answers on the handout and then explain his or her answers to you.)

Note: You can substitute a handout with the skills of any other assessment you are using.

3. Bring everyone together and ask each small group to present their thoughts and then discuss the issue as a whole group. Ask what they have learned that they will use the next time they are engaged in difficult problem solving or conflict.

Note: The article “Building Your Team’s Conflict-Resolution Skills with Emotional and Social Intelligence,” by Marcia Hughes (Hughes, Thompson, and Terrell, 2009) includes many concepts and tips that you can use to support this discussion in working with conflict with teams.

While a case could be made for all of the skills being relevant, likely skills to be named in the individual component of the presentations are:

Optional: Give the EQ-i and TESI assessments to all participants and arrange an individual debriefing for each person on his or her EQ-i results. This should be done prior to the exercise if possible, although it can be a follow-up.

WHEN PROBLEMS BECOME CONFLICTS HANDOUT image

1. Consider the skills of the EQ-i2.0 and the TESI listed below. Identify the skills that are called upon to accomplish effective problem solving, especially when the situation escalates to conflict. Notice how individual and team skills influence each other.

  • Choose a minimum of two individual and two team skills. For each skill you choose, identify one or two reasons as to what makes that skill appropriate and effective. Then write one or two ways to apply the skill.

2. Post your flip-chart page and be prepared to present your responses to the full group.

Skills of the EQ-i2.0®

Self-Perception Composite

Self-Regard: To accurately perceive, understand, and accept oneself

Self-Actualization: To strive to achieve personal goals and realize one’s potential

Emotional Self-Awareness: To be aware of and understand one’s emotions and to express them to others

Self-Expression Composite

Emotional Expression: To openly express one’s feelings both verbally and nonverbally.

Assertiveness: To effectively and constructively express one’s emotions and oneself

Independence: To be self-reliant and free of emotional dependency on others

Interpersonal Composite

Interpersonal Relationships: To establish meaningful and close relationships

Empathy: To be aware of and understand how others feel

Social Responsibility: To identify with and be a responsible and cooperative member of one’s social group

Decision Making Composite

Problem Solving: To effectively use your emotions while solving problems of a personal and interpersonal nature

Reality Testing: To objectively test one’s feelings and thinking against external reality

Impulse Control: To effectively and constructively control impulses and strong emotions, including anger

Stress Management Composite

Flexibility: To adapt and adjust one’s feelings and thinking to new situations

Stress Tolerance: To effectively and constructively manage stress and strong emotions

Optimism: To be positive and to look at the brighter side of life

Happiness/Well Being Composite

Happiness: To feel content with oneself, others and life in general. To have the ability to feel satisfied. This is a general indicator of all emotional intelligence.

Skills of the TESI®

Team identity: Measures the level of pride each member feels for the team as a whole, and how much connection members feel to the team

Motivation: A competency that measures the team’s internal resources for generating and sustaining the energy necessary to get the job done well and on time

Emotional awareness: Measures how well team members accept and value one another

Communication: Provides information on how well team members listen, encourage participation, share information, and discuss sensitive matters

Stress tolerance: Measures how well the team understands the types of stress factors and the intensity impacting its members and the team as a whole

Conflict resolution: Measures how willing the team is to engage in conflict openly and constructively without needing to get even

Positive mood: Measures the positive attitude of the team in general as well as when it is under pressure