2

THIRTEEN ECSTASIES OF THE SOUL
 

for Gordon Armstrong
1960–1996

Declaration:

ON LEAVING HOME

Tell your mother that you love her but make her no oath of loyalty. Let her clasp your hands between hers for only a moment and then pull free. Shake your father’s hand firmly then, then shake your brother’s, then bend down low to kiss your sister on the cheek. Hug your mother, and your sister, and your brother when he finally comes forward, and nod to your father, who stands with his hands behind his back. You know they expect words from you but don’t give them away. Tell them goodbye. Tell them you look forward to seeing them again but don’t say when. Tell them that today there are only starting points. The journey on which you embark has neither direction nor destination; the search that you will make has neither method nor object. If they persist in questioning you step away from them. Scratch your head, and smile, and tell them that you are a man now.