Chapter Eleven

Blake really shouldn’t tease her, but damn, this was just too good to let pass. He leaned toward her side of the backseat. “Nice ride.”

Zandra shot him the look and glared. “Shut up or I’ll record you snoring tonight and post that.”

Was that supposed to be a threat? “You gonna post that epic approach or not?”

“I don’t know,” she admitted after a brief hesitation. “This wasn’t exactly what I’d expected.”

“Not what you expected. Imagine that,” he mused. “Frankly, I’m surprised you got in this thing.”

She stuck her nose in the air. “Hey, I have an important assignment, and I’ll do what I have to do to get there in time. Even if it means catching a ride in…in…this…” She waved at the space around them.

“Well, good for you.” He had to hand it to her. When the hearse had first pulled up, he half wondered if she’d break down in tears. “I read somewhere that MOOV vehicles ranged from farm tractors pulling a trailer to high-end limousines and everything in between, so you never knew what’s headed your way.”

“I guess I was pulling for a limo.” She glanced uncomfortably at the space behind them.

“It’s empty.”

“I know. I just…this wasn’t quite what I was expecting.”

“We’ve already established that.”

“You don’t have to be so smug.” She pointed her phone at him and snapped a picture.

“What are you doing?”

She tapped on the screen a bunch of times then showed him the picture she’d taken. “Congratulations. You’re on Instagram again.”

He frowned. “What did you plaster on my face? It looks like someone barfing.”

“It is.” She slanted her eyes at him. “You’re enjoying this ride way more than you should.”

“And this is a bad thing? I’m trying to be supportive.”

“Oh, please. We both know better than that.”

He laughed, mainly because he wasn’t sure how else he was supposed to respond to her obvious displeasure. Or maybe because he knew what he wanted to do instead.

His gaze dropped to her mouth, to the way her tongue swept against her lower lip as she concentrated on her phone. He’d been so relieved when he’d found her back at the train station, he’d wanted to hold her against him and remind himself that she was fine, even though she looked fine. That she’d told him she’d wanted him to kiss her? Well, that was a no-brainer.

But what did it mean, exactly, that she’d asked for the kiss? Was she interested in him as more than her tour guide? Did she maybe want to use her tongue on—

He blinked. What the fuck was he thinking? He wasn’t back in high school, for God’s sake, trying to score with some girl. This was Zandra.

Zandra who’s tongue was doing the lower lip sweep again as she continued to poke at her phone screen. Clearly she’d blown off the kiss already.

He needed to do the same. Mainly because the kiss had felt too damn good, and he wouldn’t mind seeing where it would lead. That was a problem.

He sucked in a calming breath, glad for the space between them, lest he reach for her. Making out in public was one thing, making out in a hearse would be flat-out weird.

She took a deep breath and blew it out. “I’m going to post it. I want my stories to be fun, real, and taking life in stride. This is definitely that.”

“Yep. You have to admit it’s pretty funny.” He chuckled.

“I guess so,” she finally said then smiled and shook her head, blonde tendrils escaping from her ponytail. “It’s just that there’s more riding on this than I expected,” she grumbled. “I used to only be sharing things with my family and friends, but I’m starting to get more followers now that Flights and Sights re-posted some of my pictures from this trip.”

“That’s great, right?” When she nodded, he smiled. “So why would you want to change things up? If they’re following you, it must be because they like what you’re doing. Why add stress trying to change things? Why not just enjoy it?”

She tilted her head, and the corners of her kissable mouth turned up. “Is that what you do? Don’t get stressed and just enjoy what you’ve got going on?”

“Not always.” He shrugged. “After all, life isn’t always going to cooperate, and sometimes it’s just seriously messed up. But I try to use stressful situations to my advantage, try to use them to motivate me toward what I want. Otherwise I don’t think straight and end up making shitty choices.”

That was part of the reason he had to keep his eye on the future, which meant settling down and going after his law degree.

“Is that why everything you do is planned out?”

“Not everything.” He paused. “I’m here, aren’t I?”

“Good point.” Zandra drummed her fingers on her lap, tapped her toes, and glanced at the MOOV map on her cell phone screen, looking like she was uncomfortable in her own skin.

“Staring at the map won’t get us there any sooner,” he pointed out.

“What? Don’t you believe in mind over matter?”

Clearly what she needed was a distraction. Otherwise there was a chance Blake would be stuck trying to calm her down long before they got to the chocolate shop.

“You know what always works for me? Thinking about my life plan.” If he didn’t, he ran the risk of being one pissed-off soldier because he was helping his mother instead of chasing his own dreams. “There are lots of times I have to remind myself to be patient, but it’s always there in the back of my mind.”

“Oh, yeah?” She arched an eyebrow. “You don’t seem like the type to have a life plan.”

Somehow, coming from Zandra, that bristled. “Well, I do.”

She frowned. “I thought you were career military.”

“Yeah, well…surprise. I’m just waiting until my mom’s done with med school.”

“What does one have to do with the other?”

“Said the girl whose parents have more than enough money to put their kids through college.”

She grimaced and nodded her head. “You’re helping her.”

“So is Lily. Mom made a lot of sacrifices to raise us, so we figure it’s her turn to reach for her dreams.”

“Before you’ve even reached for yours.” She stared at him, frown lines briefly appearing before a slow smile spread across her face. “You’re taking care of her.”

Yeah…not exactly the direction Blake had expected the conversation to go. He shifted in his seat and stretched his legs out. “The point is, I know when the time will be right for me to do my thing, but until then, I roll with life.”

“Roll with life.”

“Yep. I convince myself that wherever I am is exactly where I want to be in that moment.” It was one of the ways that kept him sane, kept him from being too cagey and anxious to get on with life already.

“What if it’s not?”

“Doesn’t matter. It keeps me balanced so that, if it isn’t really where I want to be, then I’m calm enough to come up with a way to get myself out of the situation and into something better.” He nodded at her. “What about you?”

“Well, what keeps me balanced is keeping my word.”

“Why?” He hadn’t meant to ask the question, only her statement had come out with enough force that it piqued his curiosity.

“You’re going to laugh.”

“I promise I won’t.”

She glanced out at the passing scenery. “It’s all Santa’s fault.”

Santa’s fault? She had to be kidding. “Excuse me?”

“I never did get the Princess Jasmine doll, and he promised me. When I sat on his lap and told him, he promised me it would be underneath the tree on Christmas morning.”

“Excuse me?” he said again. “You still remember that? And you’re holding it against Santa?”

“You would, too, if every other girl in your class got one for Christmas and you got an abacus.” She sighed and shook her head. “Santa left a note that said an abacus was far more practical than playing with a doll.”

Holy shit, she was serious. Blake scrubbed a hand over his face and tried his damnedest not to laugh. After all, he’d promised he wouldn’t, and now would be a lousy time to go back on his word.

“My parents have always been like that, you know. Giving me what they think I need instead of what I want,” she said absently. “That’s why it’s always been important to me to keep my promises.” She hauled in a deep breath. “And I promised myself that if I ever got the chance to take photographs, I’d do whatever I had to do to make it work.” She stared at her phone again.

He had to admire her for keeping her word even when it was very clear she didn’t want to deal with it at all. “Yeah, well, for what it’s worth, we’re in a mode of transportation, and we’re in Switzerland, so who the hell cares how we get to Lucerne?” He pointed out the mountain range in the distance. “See the Swiss Alps?”

“You know something? You’re right. We’re in freakin’ Switzerland, and those are the Swiss Alps.” She pulled out her camera and started snapping pictures through the window.

“There you go.” He grinned at her enthusiasm as she switched back to taking pictures on her phone. The girl was something else.

He leaned back in his seat. The hearse thing didn’t bother him. Few things did, truth be told, and there was something to be said for detachment from the things that didn’t matter. In his experience, that meant most things didn’t matter. It was one of the many ways he’d been able to get this far in life.

Sure, he sometimes wished things could be different, but he also recognized that he wouldn’t be half the person he was today if he’d had the stellar upbringing some of his friends had had. Not that he begrudged any of them their good fortune, of course. He was patiently putting the pieces of his life together and making his own good fortune. That was all.

He blinked. Whoa. That was pretty deep shit for someone on a sort-of vacation.

“Okay,” Zandra said. “I did it. I posted the hearse video, a pic of the Alps, and your mug. Keeping it real. Being myself.” She licked her bottom lip and smiled. “No stressing.”

“No stressing.” Blake studied her, at the soft lips he didn’t get nearly enough time to explore back at the train station. No, kissing her wasn’t a mistake. But now that he’d had a taste, would he be able to keep her at arm’s length?

He sure as hell hoped so.