ALICE WONDER’S HOUSE, 7 FOLLY BRIDGE, OXFORD
TIME REMAINING: 39 MINUTES
I am staring at a golden key that looks exactly like the one Lewis Carroll gave me in the Tom Tower dream.
One of the six keys to Wonderland. The Six Impossible Keys.
Why I hid it here, I can’t remember. All I know is that it’s one of the six keys and that as a child, I hid this one here, for one reason or another. It meant the world to me and was worth the humiliation I went through.
“What did you find?” Lorina demands.
I push her hand away.
Edith swings and misses my head as I duck an inch or less. Time for some None Fu again.
I pull Edith’s arms and swing her whole body, as if she were my own baseball bat, against the wall. She sticks like a fat piece of fresh meat for a moment, her eyes rolling back, then slides down into my buckets.
Lorina surprises me with a kick in the back.
“Take this, $%$#@!” she shouts.
I find my body plastered against the wall. She kicks me once again in my lower back, and I drop to my knees, drooling.
How come this Barbie doll is that strong?
When I turn to face her, I see she has unfolded her fan again. For the first time, I notice how sharp its edges are. It could cut like a knife.
She throws it at me; it swirls and slices through the air before it reaches me, neck level.
I find myself catching it with a firm grip, right at a spot without blades.
“Learned a lot in your None Fu training, huh,” Lorina says.
I say nothing to her but threaten to throw the fan back at her while running in her direction. Lorina thinks I am going to try to cut her with the fan’s blades, but I am not a killer. I won’t stain my hands with the blood of scumbag bullies.
I keep treading with fiery eyes, happy to see the horror in hers. I keep pushing her until she falls backward into the cage through the opening, where they wanted to trap me a while ago.
I watch her trip backward and lock her inside.
“How does it feel standing inside the circus now?” I say. “How does it feel to be the clown?”
Lorina starts pleading and playing good sister with me, like last time. Thankfully, I have learned my lesson. I won’t be fooled.
I stare at the key in my palm and smile. Now I have two keys. I think this is my real journey. To collect the Six Impossible Keys to Wonderland—for what reasons, or cause, I have no idea.
But just when I think I have it all under control, I sense someone standing behind me. I turn to face them, thinking it will be Edith.
But it’s not.
It’s a man with a long hat and teacups dangling from his black tuxedo.