Somewhere in Tibet
T he Dude’s balloon is a piece of art, which the Pillar figured out right away. True, it is red, but its hood is white, the color of snow, so when we fly it, no one will be able to track us with satellites from above.
“You know how to operate this thing?” I ask the Pillar. We are already flying.
“I think so,” he says. “Saw it used in that movie Around the World in Eighty Days .”
“That’s all?”
“Don’t worry, we’ll get there.”
“And where is that exactly?” I fold my arms.
“Kalmykia,” he says, wiping blood off his cheeks.
“Kalmykia? Never heard of it.”
“The Republic of Kalmykia, a federal subject of Russia,” the Pillar explains. “It is the only region in Europe where Buddhism is practiced by the majority of the population.”
“It’s in Russia?”
“Yes, and bordering China. Very close from where we are. Got a nail shiner? I think I messed up my beautiful nails.”
I roll my eyes, secretly admiring his sense of humor while soaking in blood. “What’s in Kalmykia?”
“The next clue.”
“The clue to the third chess piece, you mean? How do you know that? I haven’t opened the rook chess piece yet,” I say while attempting to pull it out of my pockets, only to realize the Pillar is holding it in his hands. “You took it?”
“Just before we escaped the monks.”
“Why?”
“Needed to know what’s inside.”
“Did you open it?”
“Of course.”
“And it said to go to Kalmykia?”
“No, it said to get the next piece from the giant down the hole.” The Pillar furrows his brow.
I need a moment to grasp the fact that the Pillar is always a step or two ahead. “Are you telling me that’s why you pushed us into the hole?”
He nods agreeably. “Or I could have simply run toward our plane and escaped. The monks hadn’t destroyed it yet at that point.”
“You knew there was a giant in the hole? I can’t believe it.”
“It was worth it,” he says. “Because after I killed him, I found this in his cave.” He shows me the third missing piece. I can’t make out what it is with him gripping it.
“And that third piece says we’ve got to go Kalmykia?”
He nods, a wide, broad, and magnificently childish smile on his face. “A new adventure, baby.” It’s like he wasn’t being hit to death a while ago. It’s like he isn’t in pain or dripping blood or has torn-up clothes. It’s like we’re not inside a ridiculous balloon in the middle of nowhere, racing against time to save the world. The Pillar is just happy we’re going to Kalmykia.
“What’s in Kalmykia, Pillar?”
“A most beautiful city, like you’ve never seen before.” He raises his clenched hand in the air. “But first, guess what the piece in my hand is, Alice.”
“Stop being childish. I’m not guessing. Just tell me.”
“Come on, Alice. It’s not like we don’t have time to kill until we get there.” He points at the vast nowhere we’re flying above. “You know how many people have embarked on balloon trips and never found their way back down? Guess the piece in my hand.”
I have to give it to him. He is full of life. He just doesn’t care about our human worries. He lives every moment as if it’s his last. I wonder if that’s because he thinks I am going to kill him soon, or if that’s just the Pillar.
“Okay,” I say, finding myself giving in to his joyful spirit, and forgetting about all the blood on his hands. “It’s a bishop.”
“Wrong.” He winks. “Guess one more time.”