I watch the March enter the cell, a few Mushroomers behind him. “What is it?”
“I found the text that explains your story with Him.”
“On the walls? What does it say?”
“Yes, Alice.” The March’s eyes are moist, full of sympathy. I think he is going to cry. What in God’s name is he going to tell me? “I know all about your family now.”
My finger loosens on the trigger for a second, but then I force it to stay strong. I tilt my head toward the March, ever so slowly, unable to ask him to elaborate, so he does by himself.
“The Pillar, too, knows about your family,” the March says. “He lied when he denied he knew about them.”
“Why did he lie, March? Tell me. I know I can trust you.”
“It’s not going to be easy,” the March says. “I think you should lower your gun.”
“Why? Because I will not control shooting him when you tell me? I will shoot him anyways, trust me.”
“Please, Alice.”
“Just tell me, March!”
“You have to promise me not to shoot the Pillar first,” the March says.
“The Pillar is my father, isn’t he?” I’m sobbing now. I can’t feel my feet, and I think I’m going to be sucked down into a Rabbit Hole.
“No, he isn’t.”
“Then who is my family?”
“It’s what happened to them that matters,” the March says.
“Don’t,” the Pillar says to March. “Don’t tell her.”
I push the rifle against his chest, my teeth grit and my face wrinkles with irritation. “Don’t speak a word, Pillar.” Then I turn to the March. “Just tell me what happened to them. I can take it.”
The March hesitates but then speaks up. “They were killed.”
“All of them?”
“That’s what the writing on the wall says.”
“When?”
“Back in Wonderland. Your father was the dean of Oxford University, a good friend of Carroll’s.”
“And?”
“One day they gathered your family in Christ Church when Carroll was still a priest,” the March says. “He used to help children sing in the choir.”
“Children in my family?”
“Children from all over Oxford.”
“So?”
“In the middle of the ceremony they were massacred. Everyone died except Lewis, who was outside picking flowers for a brief moment.”
“Why did the Chessmaster hate my family?”
“Your father had collaborated with Lewis many times and planned to kill him for the death he caused in Wonderland. They were so close, and the Chessmaster hated them, including you, later, of course. He didn’t kill your family, though.”
“Then who did?”
The March’s face wrinkles with pain. Conflicting emotions painted a dull and confusing portrait on his face. But finally he gathered his strength and nodded toward the Pillar and said, “Him. That’s why you vowed to join him and find his weakness. Now, that doesn’t mean you have to shoot…”
The March was too late. So was my finger on the trigger. Without permission. Without thinking. I shot Carter Pillar dead.