The Vatican
“I really dig him,” a teenager in a skirt, taking selfies of Angelo Cardone, told her friends. “I mean this is the coolest pope ever.”
“I’m glad we missed the Lady Gaga concert to come see him,” her friend chirped.
The masses in the piazza weren’t praying or visiting. They weren’t even witnessing an honorable ceremony and welcoming the new pope. They were dancing to James Brown’s music. And on the balcony above, the new pope was the star of the show.
“Stop!” Angelo said, taking a breath, looking more like Mick Jagger for a second. “Enough with the dancing.”
The crowd dived into a haze of silence.
“We can always dance more later,” Angelo said as the music stopped. “Now, we have work to do.”
The crowd listened.
“I’m sure you all have heard about the Queen’s assassination.” He cruised the balcony like a preacher selling used bibles. “The world is sucked into madness.”
The crowd agreed.
“Since the arrival of those Wonderland Monsters, we can no longer live our daily lives in peace.”
“Yeah!”
“We can no longer sleep in peace.”
“Yeah!”
“We can no longer feel safe with our kids in school.”
“Yeah!”
“We can no longer trust our neighbors; in case they are a terrorist thinking they are from Wonderland. I mean, to hell with Wonderland!”
“Yeah!”
“Who are they to judge the world we live in? It’s all a scam. They aren’t from Wonderland. They have no message to pass across. They’re just killers. Psychos. They’re just mad!”
“Mad! Mad! Mad!”
“We want to get our lives back!”
“Yeah!”
“We want to have our peace back!”
“Yeah!”
“We want to party!”
“Yeah!”
“We want to have fun!”
“Yeah!”
“We want to drink all night!”
The crowd was a bit reluctant. They exchanged looks. Were they supposed to admit that out loud? A conservative woman shouted, “Nah!” But the crowd heard a ‘Yeah’. People always heard what they wanted to hear.
“Yeah!” They finally hailed.
“We want to play games all night!”
“Yeah!”
“We want to be rich!”
“Yeah!”
“We don’t want to pay taxes!”
“Yeah.”
“In fact, we prefer not to work!”
“Yeah.”
“We’d love it if the governments just pay us for being there!”
“Yeah.”
Angelo stopped and stared his fans in the eyes. “And what’s stopping us.”
“The terrorists!”
“Here you are.” He raised his hands sideways. “Wanting so much but doing so little.”
The crowd seemed confused.
“But how about if I offer you a new solution?” Angelo said. “How about if I offer you a way out of your miserable lives?”
The crowd was all ears now.
“Ladies and gentlemen,” Angelo said. “I have the solution against madness. All I ask of you is to listen with an open heart.”