Chapter Twenty-Four

ELEANOR EXCUSED HERSELF and started to head toward the stairs, hoping to retreat to the bedroom she normally shared with Mary Ann. With Mary Ann staying downstairs, Eleanor knew she could find comfort and solace in her bedroom, if nothing more than a few private moments to come to grips with her feelings. However, just as she put her foot on the first step, she saw that the door to Maem’s room was open and Mary Ann stood in the doorway, a blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she leaned against the frame.

“A wedding?” Her large eyes and pale face seemed to drain of even more color. “Please tell me it’s not more news about . . . ”

“Nee!” Eleanor shook her head. “It is not about John Willis. For once, Mary Ann, it has nothing to do with you.” She started to climb the steps but stopped when Mary Ann put her hand on the stair railing.

“But Maem sounded so angry! Whoever could it have been about?”

Eleanor drew in her breath. “She spoke of Edwin Fisher’s marriage, Mary Ann.” Then she climbed the rest of the stairs, not once looking back to see if Mary Ann followed.

She did.

“Edwin?” Surprised at this name being in the center of their discussion, Mary Ann slowly followed Eleanor into the second-floor bedroom. “Edwin Fisher? He’s to be married?”

Eleanor stood by the window, staring outside so that she did not have to look at her sister. For once she just wished her sister would go away. The last thing Eleanor wanted was to rehash the details from this horrible news.

“Eleanor? What’s going on?” she insisted.

“He’s marrying Lydia, Mary Ann.” Her voice sounded flat and emotionless. Inside, however, she cried at the very thought that their engagement was now public knowledge and sure to proceed to marriage.

“Lydia?” Mary Ann exclaimed. “But he loves you! Of that I am sure!” When Eleanor did not respond, Mary Ann walked to her and touched her arm. “Is this true, Eleanor?”

Still refusing to look at her, Eleanor nodded.

“And how long have you known?”

Finally Eleanor turned to face her sister. “Lydia was quite kind in confiding in me from the very beginning of our relationship, Mary Ann.”

Mary Ann’s mouth opened and she gasped. “Yet you never said one word to me!”

“Nee, Mary Ann,” Eleanor said. “She asked me to keep her confidence. I could not go back on my word, even though I often thought of doing so.”

“Oh!” Mary Ann sank onto the side of the bed and shut her eyes. “How could I have been so blind?” she asked rhetorically. “All this time I was thinking only of my own pain.” She raised her eyes to stare at Eleanor. “And you have been so calm and cheerful at all times. You have supported me, even when you did so by putting yourself in her presence! How selfless you are, Eleanor!”

“Do not suffer on my account, Mary Ann,” Eleanor pressed her. “I wish Edwin nothing but the greatest of happiness. More importantly I recognize that his conduct was flawless. Despite my own imagined hopes, I provoked my own disappointment through my presumptions of more than just friendship between us. And I take comfort that I did not cause others to suffer when I learned the truth. Why should others be afflicted from the pain of my misunderstanding?”

“But I shall suffer, Eleanor! Why, I begin to understand now, at least more so than I did before,” Mary Ann exclaimed. “During all this time, you knew and remained silent. You bore the pain of heartbreak as no other! With composure and discretion. And during my time of need, you supported me. I shall hate myself forever for not having been there for you. For not having seen beyond my own problems and worries to recognize yours!”

She leaped to her feet and wrapped her arms around Eleanor, holding her as tight as she could. “Oh, schwester,” Mary Ann cried. “Forgive me my impertinence and selfishness. I shall never complain again about John Willis! You have acted in a way that no one can find fault with, even if Edwin has!”

Eleanor extracted herself from her sister’s embrace. “You need to understand something,” she said in a tone that hinted at reproach. “Edwin is doing the right thing, Mary Ann. If he had backed away from his promise to Lydia, regardless of how long ago and under what circumstances he made it, I would think all the worse of him! A man without principle is no man at all.”

Mary Ann sighed. “Oh, Eleanor, don’t we know that to be true?”

Eleanor turned once more to the window, staring aimlessly out of the glass panes while Mary Ann put her arm around her older sister’s shoulders. For a long while they stood like that, the two sisters looking at nothing. Then Eleanor shut her eyes and rested her head against Mary Ann’s. Despite her facade of cheer and strength it would take her a long time to overcome the disappointment of Edwin’s marriage to Lydia. For unlike Mary Ann, Eleanor had no Christian Bechtler to comfort her or show her the compassion of a man of true principle.

Still, in true form, Eleanor felt only happiness for her sister. If one thing came from the realization that there had been no sense and even less sensibility to their initial selection of men, at least Mary Ann had found a stalwart supporter in Christian Bechtler. Their unlikely pairing may not have occurred if Mary Ann’s heart had not been broken, her eyes opened, and her character matured.

God’s plan, Eleanor thought as she felt Mary Ann’s arm tighten around her shoulder. God’s plan, indeed.