Mandy dragged herself to the door. She’d come home, taken a hot bath with wine and Casablanca, and slipped into her favorite leopard print nightgown. Only rayon, but it was comfortable. Now, wrapped in her black velveteen bathrobe, she was waiting for pizza and the bell had tolled. Hmm, For Whom the Bell Tolls wouldn’t be a bad follow-up movie. She was looking over her shoulder at her DVD collection when she opened the door.
“Hi Mandy.”
She shrieked and leaped backward, clutching the neck of her robe closed. “What are you doing here?” Suddenly she wasn’t wearing enough clothes. A HAZMAT suit with a broken zipper wouldn’t be enough clothes.
“Trying to talk to you.”
“How did you find out where I live?” She backed up another step, which he naturally took as an invitation to come inside. “Get out!”
He paused in the act of closing the door behind him. “Why?”
“I don’t want you here. If this is still about me forgiving you then fine, I’ll forgive you if you’ll go away.”
“I don’t want to go away.” He closed the door.
“But you got what you wanted.” The maelstrom of emotion she thought she’d left behind in high school pelted her like sleet. “Please, just go.”
“Mandy, I love you.”
“You keep saying that like it should mean something to me.”
“It did once. You did love me.” He put his hands on her shoulders. “I’ll go if you really want me to.”
“I really want you to.” She took another step back and bumped into the arm of the chair.
He turned toward the door.
Without Sonny, she’d be left alone with her cold misery. Forever. “Wait.”
Sonny turned back again, but he looked angry. “Make up your mind. I just spent all afternoon playing nice with your school’s football team to get this address and I’m not interested in wasting any more time.”
“I said I forgive you.”
“And if you meant it, pigs fly.”
Mandy walked across the room, loosening the neck of her robe. The whole house was warmer with him here. “You spent all afternoon playing with our football team?”
“Yes. I really just wanted to hit the weight room, but I figured that if you saw I wasn’t the creep I was then you’d give me another chance. If you’re not going to do that, then I’m going to cut my losses.”
The doorbell rang again.
“Son of a bitch.” Sonny threw open the door. “What?”
The skinny kid on the step just stared up at him. “Pizza.”
“Pizza?” He reached into his pocket and pulled out his wallet.
“I can pay for that myself,” Mandy said. She had the money in her robe pocket already.
“I’ve got it.” Sonny handed the kid a couple of bills and took the pizza.
“Wow, thanks!”
Great, now he was overtipping the pizza kid in addition to playing with the school’s team for kicks.
“Pizza,” Sonny said. Kicking off his shoes at the door, he carried the box through the living room to the kitchen as if he’d been here a hundred times and could find his way around in the dark.
“And wine. I like pizza.”
“I remember. Next you’ll be sitting down to watch an old movie. Casablanca first or will you save that for later?”
“How do you remember that?” Mandy stood next to the table watching him go through her cupboards. She’d planned to eat off the lid of the box at the coffee table, but he must be in a civilized mood.
“Your favorite color is chartreuse because you like the way the word sounds, but you actually hate the color itself. You watch Casablanca on repeat when you’re depressed. You love fuzzy things, but not furry things. You’re allergic to lilies.” He took two plates out of the cupboard and carried them to the table. “You like Thai food and hate Indian food, but given a choice you’ll eat a burger every day of the week. I remember everything, Mandy. I never forgot.”
“Then why did you tell everyone I was a slut?”
“I never said you were a slut. I said we’d had sex.”
“Then why did you tell everyone we had sex?”
“Because I was a stupid little boy who didn’t know what I had and thought those jerks we went to high school with were more important than you.” He pulled a piece of pizza free and put it on a plate. Then he thrust it at her. “I forgot to mention that you eat when you’re depressed too.”
Mandy took the plate. “It hurt, you know.”
“I’m getting that, but can’t you give me some breaks for being here now?” He hadn’t put a slice for himself on the second plate.
She set down the plate, the pizza losing its draw. “So you just got some advice from some woman to get my forgiveness and decided to hunt me down on the spur of the moment?”
“I knew where you were. Sandy Sydlowski took her job as class president very seriously. She knows where everyone we graduated with is. She has a website that she keeps updated.”
“But I didn’t graduate from there.”
“That hasn’t stopped her. She posted it when you got the job here last summer. The only thing she didn’t have was an address.”
“Why?” Why now? Why here? Why work this hard? So many whys.
Sonny sat down in a chair. “Are you going to make me spell it out?”
“Yes.” Mandy sat down beside him. The pizza was cooling between them, but that’s what microwaves were for. “Don’t tell me it’s that superstitious thing about your bad luck and failing someone, because you know I’m not going to believe that.”
“I always knew you weren’t going to.” He folded his hands on the table. “Look, I’ve got the shoe deal and the shirt deal and the soup deal. My agent is working on getting me a deodorant deal and a restaurant deal. I might be part of the Monopoly McDonald’s thing next year. In less than two weeks, I’m going to be first-string quarterback in the Super Bowl. The office passed around lists for spots in the loge at the game and I couldn’t think of anybody I wanted there.”
“Your parents. Old coaches. Best pals.” Mandy listed them off on her fingers.
“You know what I mean. My mom will be there. Coach Sims is bringing her. Other than them, there's nobody.
"Why is your old football coach taking her? What about your dad?"
"My dad passed away six years ago in the off season.”
"I'm sorry. He always seemed nice." Mandy stared at the pattern of wood on the table.
He nodded and stared at the tabletop.
Mandy clenched her hands to keep from reaching for him. “So you want me to go to the Super Bowl now?”
“No, I mean yes.” He reached across the table and took her hands. “What I want is for you to be in my life. I thought I’d be able to just walk in here and you’d be all over the chance to get back together with me.”
“You did always have a rampant ego.” Her stomach churned. Get back together with him? Being with him in high school had been crazy fun, but part of that was the sneaking around. She’d always had the sense that he didn’t want his friends to know so she’d kept away from him in the halls unless she had a tutoring related message to deliver. That should have been a sign, but what high school girl with the eye of the BMOC was going to do anything risk that?
He started rubbing his thumb in circles in the middle of her palm. Nice. Scary nice.
“Will you cut me some slack?”
“I am. I haven’t thrown you out.”
“If you want me to go that bad, I’ll go. I don’t need this shit.” He stood up and started past her, but she grabbed his wrist. He stopped.
For a moment she couldn’t speak. The war between wanting and being afraid took all her concentration. If he really meant what he said, she could get back to that Eden they’d shared in high school. “Hold on a minute.”
“Why? You’ve been pretty clear.”
“And you think you know me.” She stood up so she could be in range of his body heat. In high school he’d been really well built, but that was nothing compared to now. She still had her hand around his wrist and even there she could feel the fine tuned power of his arms. “You have to remember that this is coming out of left field for me.”
“Wrong sport.” His lips curled with humor.
“Very funny.” She looked up to study his dark eyes. “This isn’t a joke, is it?”
“How could it be a joke? We’re in your house. Where would I hide the camera?”
She unbuttoned his coat. Under it he was wearing an innocent enough blue knit shirt that struggled to stretch across his perfect chest. She caressed the material as if she was looking for a wire. Mercy. “Nothing here.”
“Told you.”
“It just feels a little like Candid Camera.” She pushed his coat off his shoulders and let it drop behind him.
“Candid Camera would not allow this.” He hooked his fingers through the sash of her robe and pulled it open.
She hadn’t bothered to put on a bra after her bath so when his hand closed around her breast it was only covered by the thin material of her nightgown. Wrapping her hand around the back of his neck, she pulled him down to kiss her.
“You’re not going to kick me out afterward again, are you?” he murmured against her mouth.
“Haven’t decided yet.”
He kissed her, teasing her tongue into his mouth. Cradling her head with one hand, he slid the other under her robe to the small of her back with only the sheer rayon barrier of her nightgown between his flesh and hers. Why had she put a nightgown on in the first place? Nothing would have been so much more efficient.
“How about now?” he asked when he let her up for air.
“Eight-five percent sure.”
“I like those odds.” He lifted her and carried her upstairs like she weighed nothing. “Which door?”
“What? Are you too good for backseats now?”
“No more backseats, not with you. Maybe the occasional desk or kitchen table though. Which door?”
Mandy nodded to toward the bedroom door. He carried her through, laid her down.
“I can’t believe I waited this long.” He cupped her face. “Do you know how much I have needed you every step of my career?”
She started unbuttoning his shirt. “You do a lot of chemistry on the football field?”
“You know that’s not what I mean.”
She did know and that frightened her. In high school she’d been so seriously in love with him. Her parents had told her she was too young to understand love and that she’d meet someone even better for her, but they’d underestimated her on other things too.
He pulled her nightgown up, stroking her thigh. “You feel exactly the same.”
She didn’t, but he wasn’t talking about her ability to trust. She bent one knee, and he took the invitation to slide his hand between her legs.
“Oh baby.” He buried his face in the curve of her shoulder, sucking and licking her hot skin.
She finished opening his shirt and pushed it off him. For a moment his hand moved away from her thighs and then returned, seeking higher until it slid between her nether lips. The jolt of contact made her gasp. “I hope you came prepared.”
“Are you kidding? I never doubted success.” He sat up and pulled her with him so she could free herself from her robe and nightgown. “This is a hot number. You wear it special for me?”
She laughed because she didn’t have another response. Chatting was not what she wanted right now. This afternoon in her office had just whet her appetite. She reached for his pants.
“Eager?” He covered her hands with his. “Me too.” He reached into his back pocket and produced a condom. “You open this and I’ll open these.”
“You never were very good at opening the condom.” She ripped it open.
“I was really good at using it though.” He climbed off the bed and pushed his jeans off. All of him, completely naked, standing next to her bed for an instant. His cock was huge and thick, seeking her. She could remember how it felt in her hand and against her tongue, and what it tasted like when he came in her mouth. She’d missed it all. She rolled the condom over him.
He stretched out next to her, running his hand up her torso to cup her breast. “You are so gorgeous.” He leaned down and took her nipple into his mouth, teasing it with his tongue until she squirmed. Her other nipple cried out with jealousy. Moving over her, he trailed kisses down her legs. “I have been dreaming about this.”
“Then you should start doing.” She lay back, helpless. Her whole body was overheated to the point where she thought she should be steaming.
He spread her thighs with a soft groan and kissed inside her knee. “May I?”
“I won’t stop you.” Mandy clenched the bedspread. “This is a lot better than the backseat of a car.”
“No kidding.” He drove his tongue into the crease at the top of her thighs, drawing a needy wail from her. He cupped his hands around her ass cheeks, spreading her wider. “I always did like this part.”
“Me too.”
One of his fingers slid into her crack heading down.
“Where are you going?”
“Trust me.”
Trust him? Again? That nanosecond of fear was blotted out the moment his fingertip brushed her anus. That feathery exploration twisted through her, forcing out a gasp. Her thighs shivered.
“More?”
How could she have ever doubted him? “Yes, more please.”
He pressed in, easing his finger inside. Then he closed his mouth over her swollen clit.
Mandy squeezed her eyes shut. Every fiber of her being focused on the tiny motions and pressure of his lips and tongue as he worked her past frenzy. She pushed her heels into the mattress, lifting her body to meet him and he obliged by leaning in harder. “Yes! Yes!” She peaked and shattered, sagging down into his hands as aftershocks rippled through her.
“Good?” He kissed her stomach as he crawled up her body. “I’m not done.”
“You haven’t gotten a touchdown yet.”
He licked between her breasts. “It sure looked like a touchdown.”
“First down maybe.” She slid her hands down his arms. He wasn’t this developed in high school. Years had given him a solidity he hadn’t had before.
“As long as we’re not fourth and ballgame.” He rubbed the head of his cock against her.
She gasped. “No, not that.”
He eased into her. Mandy could feel her muscles tensing and relaxing, trying to pull him deeper as he buried himself in her.
“Slow is good,” she said.
“Slow and hard?” He grasped her shoulders for leverage as he thrust into her.
“Yeah, good.” Mandy clutched his shoulders, focused on the satin of his skin on hers and his cock inside her. Their sweat slicked bellies rubbed together. Something else years had given him. Stamina. Control. The dizzying sensations spun out for eons as she heard herself moaning and begging for more. Her nipples felt like electric points, rubbing along his solid chest. She hooked her ankles together in the small of his back, angling her hips to take him deeper.
“First and down?” he whispered in her ear.
“Touchdown.” The building tension split. “Sonny!”
“I love you, Mandy.” He shuddered, filling her, and sagged onto her.
Something else she’d forgotten. The sound of his heartbeat slowing against hers after sex.
“I must be crushing you,” he said, shifting to one side.
“I didn’t mind.” She turned to face him. “Did you mean that?”
“Mean what?” He brushed her hair off her face. “That I love you? Come on, Mandy, haven’t you been listening?”
“You said you came here because somebody convinced you I put a hex on you.”
“I guess something like that.” He picked up her hand and kissed her palm. “I guess that part wasn’t entirely true, but it made an excellent excuse.”
“You needed an excuse?”
“I guess. Mandy, can’t you just let it go? How many times do I have to apologize?”
“As many times as it takes.”
“I didn’t just say sorry once. I said sorry one, two, three…” He started counting on his fingers and then quit. “I said it several times. You’d think by now you’d believe me.”
“You just showed up today after eleven years. You think one day is enough to forgive you?”
“Eleven years. You’d think it was a lifetime.”
“It felt like a lifetime. Why can’t you give me a little time?” Mandy sat up and wrapped her arms around her knees. “Eight hours of being nice is not going to make up for eleven years.”
“I didn’t lie about you for eleven years. I lied one time, Mandy. I’m sorry. Why can’t you give me a break?”
“Because you’ve had all the breaks.”
“No, I haven’t.” Sonny shook his head and climbed off the bed.
“What are you doing?” Mandy hadn’t felt naked until now.
“Leaving.” He pulled his jeans up and scowled, then he pulled them down again to take off the condom and toss it across the room into the trash inside the bathroom door.
A perfect bull’s-eye. Mandy stared at the trashcan for a moment before turning back to Sonny. “You don’t have to go.”
“I know I hurt you. I know it was bad, but short of going on a speaking tour of high schools telling jocks not to be jerks, I don’t know what you want me to do. And I can’t do that until after the game. I should be at practices right now. I’m getting fined by the team for every day I don’t show up. I miss too many practices and I won’t be starting in the Super Bowl. If I had known you were going to be such a vindictive bitch I never would have come in the first place.”
“I’m not being a vindictive bitch, you just think everyone should forgive you for everything you might do wrong just because you say sorry.” Mandy yanked on her robe. “I didn’t know you were getting in trouble for not being at practice.”
“When I came here I thought it would be worth the sacrifice if I could win you back.” He pulled his shirt on and walked out of the room and down the stairs.
Mandy belted her robe and chased after him. “But you’ll come back won’t you?” Not that she’d given him good reason to. He had put on his coat and was now looking for his shoes. Why did it feel like there had never been another way for this to play out?
“I’m done playing this stupid game with you, Mandy.”
“Because you have another stupid game to go play.”
He yanked open the door, stared at her and then slammed it behind him.
Mandy sat down on the stairs. His underwear was still lying on the floor of her bedroom. The pizza was on the dining table and cold. The sex was amazing, but the détente was shattered.
That went well.