THE NEXT DAY, Finn was still getting his ass chewed, but it wasn’t by karma. It was by Basic English Comp. It wasn’t that he was incapable of understanding what he had to do—he’d come to terms with the fear—it was that he didn’t know how to do it. And that in turn made him doubt his goals. Was he going to be able to power through a degree with minimal writing skills?
After spending the better part of two hours in the warehouse tackling essay organization exercises and then trying to apply them to his own assignment, he decided that he needed to see the master. He told himself it was solely because he needed help with his English—not because he was recalling little things about Molly that kind of turned him on. She’d drop him off and then go get laid. Right.
She seemed surprised to see him when he knocked on her door, and even though it wasn’t her office hours, she waved him in.
“Sorry I’m not here during the official time. I have to close the store tonight, so I took a chance that you could squeeze me in.”
And was it his imagination, or had her expression shifted when he said “squeeze me in”? He needed to get a grip here. He was going all schoolboy lustful. It didn’t help that Molly’s cheeks seemed pinker than usual. Was it possible that her thoughts were mirroring his?
“I don’t see a kitten...”
Finn smiled in spite of himself. “Buddy is with his other dad.”
“Ah. What’s going on?” she asked, motioning for him to sit across from her. The desk served as a nice big barrier and Molly was staying on her side of it.
“Take a guess.”
“Organization.”
“Got it in one. I was wondering if you have any...I don’t know...tricks or anything to help me wrangle this beast? My thoughts don’t come out in neat categories.”
“You’re not alone there.”
“Good to know.”
“Have you tried the note card approach?”
She seemed to think that he knew what she was referring to. He did not. “What is that?” She pressed her lips together and he said, “Let me guess...this is a technique I should have learned in high school...or earlier.”
“Good possibility.”
“I kind of marched to my own drummer back then. You know...when I passed my classes because I was breathing.”
“I would hope you had to do more than breathe,” Molly said.
“I handed in all my work.”
“There you go.”
He leaned back in the chair, enjoying the way rising color was brightening her cheeks, even as she kept her gaze direct and no-nonsense. “Tell me about this method that I blew off years ago.”
“You write down one idea at a time on note cards, then arrange them according to categories. You can use something as simple as Who, What, Why, Where, When. Get some three-by-five note cards and write down one sentence on each one. Then organize and write an outline.”
“Huh.” He gave her a look. “I kind of remember something like this from junior high. I believe I instantly disregarded and fired off a paper from the hip.”
“I imagine it was a good one, too.”
He smiled at her wry retort. “I’ll give this method a go—for real, this time. Thanks.”
He got to his feet, but before he could head to the door, Molly said, “You know, if your brain isn’t wired to learn in the way you’re being taught, there’s a good chance you’re going to tune out.”
Finn gave a slow nod. “That could explain a lot.” As could total lack of interest in anything that wasn’t sports.
Molly’s mouth quirked up at one corner as she idly tapped her pencil on her desk. “That’s why dyslexic kids sometimes become discipline problems.”
“I was an angel.”
She smiled at his deadpan reply. “Then someone was spreading a lot of lies about you.”
“I was a victim of circumstances.”
“You were a hellion.”
“Whom you apparently admired.”
Her color was rising again, but she didn’t back down. “I was young.”
“So was I.”
There was a knock on the door and they both turned to see a kid with an imperious expression peering at them through the glass as if he expected Molly to instantly let him in and kick Finn out.
Molly’s smile became fixed as she stared at the door.
“I’ll get out of your hair. Thanks for the strategy.”
Before Finn could move, the kid knocked again, loudly enough that the sound echoed through the room. Molly frowned and got to her feet, quickly moving around her desk to open the door. “Jonas, I have another student here.”
“And I have a class in ten minutes. I want to discuss my latest grade.”
“My office hours are between four and five. You know that. I’m happy to see drop-ins, but you have to understand that when you drop in there’s a good chance I have another commitment. Like I have right now.”
“I would like an appointment.” The kid spoke as if he were royalty, and Finn’s neck muscles started to tighten.
“Fine. Tomorrow at four o’clock.”
Molly sent Finn a quick look edged with something that looked like murder, then stepped out into the hall and pulled the door shut behind her. As much as he would have loved to listen at the door, Finn kept his seat. He heard the sound of arguing, one raised voice, cold, just a little whiny, and then a few seconds later, Molly came back into the room.
“Settled?”
“For now. He thinks he owns my time.” Molly grimaced. “He is entitled, with a capital E.”
“Huh. I thought entitled was spelled with an I.”
“All right,” Molly said, laughter lighting her eyes. “He’s entitled with a capital I.”
* * *
MOLLY DID NOT WANT to be charmed by Finn. He reminded her too much of Blake.
No. That wasn’t it.
She stopped digging through the box of sweaters and fleeces to consider for a moment.
He did remind her of Blake in some ways, but what bothered her was that she was reacting to him the way she’d reacted to Blake before she knew the truth about him. That was where the trouble lay.
Fortunately, the one thing she could control in life was her reactions.
“Did you find it?” Georgina yelled from her bedroom.
Molly pulled a thick red fleece from the bottom of the storage box. “I have a red one. I don’t see a navy.”
“That will do,” Georgina said as she appeared in the doorway. She reached for the fleece and Molly tossed it to her.
“That’s all you need? You’re set for your hike tomorrow?” Her sister was seeing a lot of Chase, and while Molly had a few reservations, she kept them to herself. Georgina was a smart girl, and her older sister was a walking cautionary tale.
Georgina slung the fleece over her shoulder and pulled the check-marked list Chase had given her out of one pocket and a plastic disposable rain poncho from the other. “What else could I need?”
Molly had to admit that the kid was prepared. Even though it was supposed to be a two-to three-hour hike, he’d made certain that Georgina was dressed for all eventualities, from heat wave to snow.
“If I like hiking, I’ll invest in some stuff.” Georgina shoved the list and poncho back into her jacket pockets.
“I truly doubt I’ll ever use my hiking boots again.”
“Then I’ll feel free to sweat in them.” Georgina grinned at her and disappeared down the hall. “I’m setting my alarm for five o’clock,” she called back. “Do you want me to wake you?”
“No! Tiptoe when you get up.”
“In hiking boots?”
“Do your best.”
Molly put the sweatshirts and jackets back into the storage box and replaced the lid. The red fleece she’d just handed off to her sister had belonged to Blake. She had no idea how it’d escaped the post-breakup purge, but it had and now it would be useful—as long as Georgina didn’t discover who it’d belonged to. If she did, she might just light it on fire.
The protective-loyal gene ran strong in their family. Blake had hurt her sister, therefore Blake was the devil.
But honestly, just as she’d recently noted in her notebook, there’d been some good to their relationship. Blake had taught her that risk-taking had rewards as well as consequences, and sometimes it was better to throw caution to the wind and feel truly alive than to sit at home, where it was safe. All he asked in return was that she manage his life. Handle the day-to-day stuff. Be there when he came home from the road. Be his partner and his problem-solver.
Where she’d messed up was in believing that they had the same ideas on finance and fidelity. They did not.
Not even close.
The result had been humiliating. Apparently everyone in Blake’s sphere had known about the other women. Everyone. And when she’d found out, she’d felt so duped. So stupid.
So very angry.
But thanks to the anger, she’d grown a backbone.
The bottom line was that she didn’t mind being charmed, but she wanted to feel...safe...in the process. In control. She was looking for the antithesis of Blake—someone sedate and trustworthy and predictable. She was definitely not getting deeply involved with someone she didn’t know inside and out, someone she wasn’t positively certain she could trust.
But would she get minorly involved?
That was the question niggling at her. The question she shoved aside as she brewed tea and dived into her grading. Sometimes it was simply better not to think too much.
* * *
GEORGINA WAS LONG GONE by the time Molly got out of bed the next morning. Chase had brought a map of the area where they planned to hike, and Georgina had left it on the kitchen table with a note telling her to expect them back in mid-to late afternoon.
And she’d made coffee. Molly gratefully poured a cup from the carafe and hugged it with both hands as she sat at the table. She’d stayed up late finishing her grading, so the day stretched ahead of her. There was so much she could be doing around the house that she really wasn’t certain where to start.
Laundry. Always laundry.
So the morning went. Molly caught up on the laundry, hanging out sheets and towels on the backyard clothesline, washing her delicates in the kitchen sink and drying them on a rack in the utility room.
She swept, mopped, polished and then just after lunch, figuring it was five o’clock somewhere, poured herself a glass of wine. She’d no sooner put the cork in the bottle than there was a knock on the door.
Mike stood on the porch and Molly opened the door wider when she saw that it was him. “I’m having a little barbecue this afternoon with a friend of mine. Would you and Georgina like to join us?”
“Georgina is hiking with Chase today. She won’t be back until late afternoon.”
“How about you, then? You don’t want to spend your day all alone, do you?”
Well...honestly...yes...
But something in the old man’s expression made her say, “I’d love to come over. What should I bring?”
“Just yourself. I have the steaks and my lady friend is bringing the side dishes. Finn covered dessert.”
Molly had half expected that Finn would be there and now she had confirmation.
“What time?”
“We’re thinking three o’clock.”
“I’ll be there.” It gave her time to change her clothes, put on some makeup. Pretend she wasn’t secretly looking forward to seeing Finn. She was honest enough to admit that she enjoyed the physical rush of being around him. Nothing wrong with that—as long as she remembered her life parameters and goals and acted accordingly.
Right?
Besides, it was damned hard to fight biological responses.
“Sorry about the late notice. Elaine and I were supposed to go to lunch today, but she got waylaid, so I suggested a barbecue this afternoon and she agreed.”
“A pop-up barbecue.” Mike frowned at her and Molly laughed. “Never mind. Kid talk. I’ll be over shortly.”
Less than an hour later Molly knocked on Mike’s open door, and he motioned her to come inside and then escorted her through the kitchen, where Finn stood at the sink, popping ice cubes out of a tray, to the charming backyard. Finn glanced at her as she walked by, smiled, made her heart go thump.
A plumpish woman with salt-and-pepper hair got up from her chair under the apple tree as Molly and Mike stepped out onto the patio.
Mike motioned at the woman. “Do you know—”
Molly’s mouth popped open. “Ms. Fitch!”
“Molly Adamson!”
Molly wasn’t much of a hugger, but Ms. Fitch headed toward her, arms open, so she met her halfway. “Call me Elaine. It’s good to see you, Molly.”
“It’s good to be remembered. Are you still teaching?” Molly asked as she stepped back out of the woman’s embrace.
“No,” Finn said as he emerged from the house carrying a tray of drinks. “My friends and I wore her out.”
Elaine laughed. “You and about two thousand other freshmen. Note to self—do not teach freshman anything.”
“I had you my junior year,” Molly said, talking a seat on the opposite side of the picnic table.
“Which is why I remember you fondly.” She smiled up at Finn as she took the drink he offered her. “This one...” She laughed and Finn’s eyes crinkled at the corners.
“Guilty.”
“Of what?” Molly asked.
“Probably everything.”
“Well, you were a charming hell-raiser. I’ll give you that.” Elaine lifted her glass in a toast, then smiled up at Mike as he came to take his seat.
“Steaks will be ready to go on the grill in about twenty minutes.”
“I wish you would have let me bring something,” Molly said.
“Next time.” Mike smiled and turned his attention to Elaine, leaving Molly and Finn facing each other with not a whole lot to say. Molly caught the amusement in his eyes and took charge of the conversation.
“I told you that you were a hellion. Now I have confirmation.”
“I never denied.” He lifted his drink, took a sip, and there was something innately sensual in the action.
“No,” Molly said softly. “You didn’t.” She took a sip of her own drink. Next to her Elaine and Mike began discussing the trials and tribulations of raising headstrong children. Molly could only imagine. No one in her family was headstrong. They’d listened to their parents, did the right thing when they could. None of them were big risk-takers.
Had they lost out?
Listening to the stories Mike told as they waited for the grill to heat and the steaks to come to room temperature, Molly half wondered, then told herself, no. A person needed to be wired a certain way to enjoy risky behavior. Blake had been wired that way. He’d enjoyed his double life. He hadn’t come out and admitted it, but it had been pretty obvious as they’d duked it out at the end of their doomed relationship.
He had no regrets about the taking risks part—only the screwing up the other side of his life part. Thus twelve white tulips. At least there’d been no more flowers, but Molly knew the flowers weren’t for forgiveness alone. Blake would follow up; and she’d have to get tough with him...unless she took the offensive.
It was then that she noticed that she was grasping her glass so tightly that her fingers had started to go white at the knuckles, and that Finn was studying her with a faint frown. She relaxed her grip on the glass and smiled at him.
“Taken back by the family tales?” he asked mildly.
“Actually, I was thinking of a few incidents in my own life.”
“Care to share?”
“Some things are best forgotten,” she said lightly and focused on Elaine and Mike. If only those things would stop trying to get in contact with her.
Mike had just started the steaks when Molly’s phone rang in her pocket. Georgina.
“We got back early. Where are you?”
“Mike’s backyard.”
“Tell her to come over,” Mike called. “I have extra steaks.”
Molly relayed the message and a few minutes later Georgina showed up, looking windswept and happy.
“How could I have never hiked before?” she demanded.
“Uh...you said you’d hate it when I tried to take you with me?”
Georgina waved her hand dismissively, then turned toward Elaine, who asked where she’d hiked. As Georgina explained where they’d gone and what they’d seen, Molly slipped over to help Mike with the steaks.
“These are gorgeous,” she murmured.
“From the Lightning Creek Ranch. Grass-fed.” He glanced her way. “It pays to marry into a ranching family.”
“When do Dylan and Jolie get married?”
“Next month. On the ranch.”
“Sounds lovely.”
“I’m just glad to get Dylan married off to a decent woman. His first wife...” Mike’s mouth hardened as he poked at a steak.
So Dylan had been married before to a woman Mike didn’t approve of. Or maybe it was her actions after they’d married he didn’t approve of. The important thing was that he seemed to approve of Jolie.
“They’ll be back pretty soon, then.”
“Two weeks.”
“I bet you can’t wait.”
Mike gave a satisfied nod. “It’s good having both of my boys back.”
Dinner stretched on until the early hours of the evening. Molly hung back and watched as Georgina and Elaine entertained. Both were natural extroverts and she was always glad to hand the spotlight over to anyone who wanted it. After dinner, Elaine announced that she was doing the dishes and Molly volunteered to help, since she hadn’t brought anything. Georgina continued to share stories with Finn and Mike, and his two friends, Cal and Karl, who’d shown up around dessert after a day of fishing. It was a full house, or rather yard, with a lot of positive, happy energy.
Molly was more than glad to escape for fifteen minutes or so. It was hell being a natural introvert.
“None of my business,” Elaine said after loading the dishwasher and filling a sink with soapy water to wash the excess dishes, “but I have to ask...are you and Finn...?”
Molly gave her a startled look. “No.” The word came out automatically, adamantly.
Dear heavens...had they come off as a couple? Molly quickly replayed the events of the afternoon and could come up with nothing, other than the vibe between her and Finn. The same vibe that had been growing since he first reported to her class.
“Oh. My mistake.” Elaine smiled a little and reached for a serving plate, which she submerged in the soapy water. “I misread things.”
“He’s a student in my English Basic Comp class at the community college,” Molly murmured, as if that explained the time she’d spent studying Finn from behind her sunglasses, feeling totally safe because, hey—dark glasses. “We know each other that way. Teacher. Student.”
Elaine’s eyebrows lifted as she washed the plate, but she did not look at Molly. The shift in her expression was enough to tell Molly that the dark glasses hadn’t been enough.
“Finn’s attractive,” she allowed in a carefully casual voice. “But I’m looking for more than a pretty face.”
“And he is good-looking. Finn looks a lot like Mike did when he was young.”
“You knew Mike when he was young?”
“I knew who he was. He didn’t know me.” She handed Molly a dish to rinse. “Well, if you’re not just looking for a pretty face, then what are you looking for in a partner?”
Molly frowned at her. “If someone had told me thirteen years ago that I’d be trading man-talk with my science teacher...”
Elaine smiled back. “Life is funny.” Then she raised her eyebrows in a clear invitation to continue.
“I’m looking for someone who probably doesn’t exist,” Molly said on a laugh. She’d made a list of qualities in her notebook and rattled off the top few. “He’ll be steady and predictable. Definitely professional—someone settled in their career. Maybe another college teacher.”
“Kind of a male version of yourself?” Elaine asked shrewdly.
“I don’t think that’s such a bad thing. Compatibility and all that.”
“Not going for the excitement of opposites attract?”
“Been there. Done that.” Molly let out a long breath. “I won’t do it again.” She shot her former teacher a look. “Give me boring and sedate any day.” She gave a soft snort. “Wild attraction is fun, but it can also—” she looked for the right words and finally settled on “—lack substance.” Molly placed a plate in the drain rack. “Guess that’s why I need more than a pretty face.”
* * *
WHAT WAS THAT thing his mother used to say about eavesdroppers never hearing anything good about themselves?
Finn knew for a fact that wasn’t true, having secretly listened in on the occasional girl conversation back in the day, but it sure as hell was true in this case.
He finished scraping the barbecue grill into the trashcan, which just happened to be next to the open kitchen window. Molly and Ms. Fitch were still discussing the best qualities in a man. Qualities he apparently didn’t have, according to Molly. He could deal with not being her dream guy, but lacking substance and being just a pretty face?
That pissed him off.
“Looks good,” Mike said.
Finn glanced down at the grill that he’d been scrubbing with dry steel wool and saw that, yes, it was probably cleaner than it had been in years. Maybe since it was new.
“Yeah. I like a shiny grill.”
“Since when?” Mike asked.
Finn hefted the grill without answering and carried it back to the barbecue, where he set it in place.
Let it go.
And he did...right up until Molly went into the house for bowls so that he could dish out the ice cream he’d brought. He followed her into the kitchen and she smiled at him from cupboard.
“I got this. Seven of us, right?”
“Yeah.” Molly stopped counting bowls and glanced back at him with a slight frown. Part of him said to walk away. Another part, one that he couldn’t quite rein in, refused to back away, as he well should, in the name of peace and harmony.
“Is something wrong?”
“Not unless you count lack of substance and just being a pretty face.”
Molly’s cheeks went bright red. She opened her mouth. Closed it again. Finally she managed to get out a single word. “How?”
“I was cleaning the grill on the deck, next to the kitchen window. I hadn’t intended to listen, but when you hear your name...” He gave a shrug.
Molly lifted her chin. “I didn’t say you lacked substance.”
“Yeah. I’m pretty sure you did.”
“What I meant was...” Her voice trailed as she gave him a look that bordered on pleading. Finn wasn’t going to give her any help. Or a break. But he didn’t mind turning up the heat.
“What did you mean, Molly?”
“That you aren’t right for me.”
“Ah.” He briefly sucked his cheeks in and sauntered just a little closer, frowning as he asked, “Since when then was that an issue, me being right for you?”
If her cheeks were red before, now they were on fire. “It’s not an issue. Elaine—” She stopped abruptly and shook her head. “Nothing I can say here will help.”
“No. I don’t think it will.”
“Maybe I’d better go.”
Now he shook his head. “No. I think you should have ice cream so that Mike doesn’t get worried about you...then you should go.”