This book emerged from my (Claire's) work with people who generously entrusted their grief to me and asked heartfelt and difficult questions, such as “Will my life ever have joy in it again?” Opening to Grief is my response to these important questions and my effort to offer solace. I am so moved by each of you who has shared your vulnerability and courage. Thank you.
This book would not have come into being without the help of many people, but two stand out. Marnie and I would like to thank Laurie Skillings and Arnie Kotler. Laurie began copy editing this project four years ago. Her focus, keen eye, and passion for the subject are inspiring and immeasurably helpful. She often dropped everything she was doing when I needed advice or some technical piece of information. Our agent and editor, Arnie Kotler, had faith in Opening to Grief as soon as he read an early draft and offered to represent us. His steady presence and graceful and insightful editing brought the book to completion. Working with Arnie is one of the true joys of this project. And to those who shared your writings with us—Beth, Jackie, John, and Debbie—a very special thanks to you.
We both feel continuing gratitude to Peter Turner and the rest of the team at Red Wheel/Weiser who saw the potential in our book and collaborated with us in bringing it forth.
I (Claire) also wish to thank my coauthor, oldest friend, and wordsmith for collaborating with me in writing Opening to Grief. It was Marnie's skillful writing, creative ideas, and editing that made this book possible. I also wish to thank my friends and family who accompanied me on this journey and offered support, edits, and invaluable guidance. Most especially, a big thanks to Thalia, who patiently lived through this process alongside me and offered endless encouragement. My teacher, Koshin Paley Ellison, guided me, always with a firm gentleness, in my daily practice from the time this book was born. I wish to thank my mother, Liz, Jeanne, Brita, Marilyn, Otis, Margaret, Catherine, Susan, Joyce, Sarah, Lorraine, Joanne, Alex, MC, Betsy, Bob, Rachael, Carlin, Emily, Olivia, and Eileen.
Marnie would like to especially thank Claire for inviting me into your grief work and this collaboration. In our long and dear friendship, you have supported me through cancer and other challenges; you've taught me yoga; and you have deftly shepherded this project from start to finish.
I would also like to thank my friend Francesca Coltrera for your kind and critical feedback on an early draft of this manuscript. Thank you to Patricia Khoury, my high school English teacher, and to Transom Workshops. You shaped my writing.
Thanks to Shane Hofeldt, my collaborator in making short documentary films. Your rigor and grace in telling stories influenced this book. Thank you to poets (the late) Stanley Kunitz and Genine Lentine. Working with you on The Wild Braid was one of my most satisfying projects. I grew and healed in your presence in the garden and in your love of words.
Thank you to my beloved doctors, AnneKathryn Goodman, Michael Seiden, Jessica McCannon, and Rocio Hurtado. I am alive and healthy because of you. And thank you to my acupuncturist Mary Stewart at Berkeley Acupuncture Project for laughter and chats, as valuable and as healing as the needles.
Thank you to my meditation teacher Will Kabat-Zinn who leads with humility, steadiness, insight, generosity, and kindness. You are teaching me how to practice.
And thank you to my daughters, Jamie and Jessye Crawford. Without you, I would not know unconditional love.