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Chapter 33

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“That’s not Ava.” Someone stated the obvious as Lily and I stepped over the invisible line that separated Thom’s and Chief Reed’s territories. My oath tugged at my shirtsleeves, trying to pull me back toward the idling vehicle in which my new pack leader waited. I quelled the urge but still felt seconds starting to count down in my gut.

“It’s not,” I said, my gaze meeting Thom’s clear blue eyes. There wasn’t time to explain Lily’s story detail by detail. Nor was there time to manage my words so they didn’t tilt a ragged pack off kilter. I hesitated, unsure what, exactly, I hoped to get out of five minutes on the Gate City side of the line.

Or, rather, four minutes and thirty-three seconds. Thirty-two. Thirty-one....

Then Thom was beside me, his long strides eliminating the distance between us. “Walk with me.”

Another thirteen second passed in silence as we separated ourselves from listening werewolves. Thom’s proximity buoyed me up in ways I couldn’t quite put my finger on, ways that pointed to a gaping loneliness ahead.

The remaining four minutes weren’t about me, however. Couldn’t be about me. Instead, I told Thom as quickly as possible how I’d promised Lily that he would offer her a place in Gate City. I acknowledged the drama bound to ensue among his lone wolves, plus—if the secret got out—the danger that would come his way from the Randolph pack.

“Of course.” Thom turned to face me in the middle of the gravel road, his body language intent, focused. Unlike Chief Reed’s mountaintop, this whole valley was already drenched in winter shadow. But Thom’s presence warmed me. His broad shoulders seemed to shield me from the darkness. “Now will you tell me what’s wrong?”

“Besides the fact we don’t know where Ava is? That I wasted enough time so her kidnapper could be anywhere at this point?”

“We’ll find Ava,” Thom promised, his words bringing feeling back into digits that had been frozen seemingly forever. “And that’s not what’s bothering you right now.”

Thom wanted to know and I wanted to tell him. But I couldn’t. Not while looking at his face.

Instead, I closed my eyes and spoke into the darkness. “I’ve been an idiot, Thom. Every time you offered me a pack bond I refused it because I was afraid of losing a connection that I’d already lost. And so”—I took a deep breath, this last part almost too painful to speak out loud—“when Chief Reed demanded I stay in his territory and become his heir if I wanted to free Ava—well, Lily, but I thought it was Ava—I said yes.”

I wasn’t sure my explanation made sense. All that made sense was the emptiness in my gut that promised I’d thrown away my one chance for true happiness. That I hadn’t valued the treasure I possessed until I lost it. Salt prickled the undersides of my eyelids.

Then a finger of warmth slid across my cheekbone. “I’ve been an idiot too.” Thom’s rumble vibrated through our tiny point of connection, warming me even though the countdown was approaching zero. One minute and twenty-seven seconds. Twenty-six. Twenty-five. Twenty-four....

Blinking my eyes open, I soaked up Thom’s presence. Shadows had turned his face even more beautiful, emphasizing the strength of his bone structure. “An idiot?” I parroted back at him.

“An idiot,” he confirmed. “I’ve been pretending not to notice that my life expands every day you’re part of it. I’ve been pretending not to notice that you’re different from anyone else I’ve ever met.”

I couldn’t help it. I barked out a laugh. “Different, yes. I’ve heard that before.”

Thom frowned and I should have flinched. Instead, I grinned and waved him silent before he could reframe his words. “Never mind. I get what you’re saying.”

“Do you?” That heat-giving finger slid down my cheek. At the corner of my mouth, it lingered for one split second before leaving my skin behind. “You’ve been shielding your heart these last three months and I’ve been shielding my heart for two decades. But who’s to say that if you did what I asked and committed to our pack, you wouldn’t be hit by a bus tomorrow?”

Despite the seconds fading faster than daylight, I couldn’t help chuckling. “I hope my reflexes are better than that.”

“I hope so too. But that’s not the point.” Thom reached up now to cup my face in both of his hands. His blue eyes blazed out of the darkness and I’d never felt closer to anyone than I did to Thom in that moment.

“The future is unknowable,” he murmured, words like nets drawing us together. “The past is unchangeable. All we can count on is this present moment. And in this present moment, I want you.”

I itched to take what he was offering, to seize it and clutch it close to my heart. But, in all fairness, I had to point out the obvious. “I can’t bind to your pack,” I admitted, the words like a rusty lock being forced shut around me. “Not while I’m heir to a different pack.”

Thom’s answer came fast. “Doesn’t matter. I’m not asking for anything from you, Kira. Instead, I’m giving what I’ve wanted to give from the first moment I met you.”

What he was giving me—his heart, his commitment—I felt sizzling in the air between us. Words were unnecessary. Bonds were irrelevant.

Then he was kissing me and I was kissing him and the darkness of night might as well have been fireworks. The pack, too far away to hear our words but close enough to see two silhouettes merge into one being, whistled and catcalled. In my gut, my brief allotment of time outside Reed territory slithered away to zero.

And it didn’t matter. Nothing mattered other than Thom.

***

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THOM WALKED ME BACK to the boundary, a location he seemed to feel as easily as I did. Because he stopped just as his toes touched the invisible barrier. Stopped there and called past the border guards. “Reed! Get your ass over here.”

I couldn’t see Chief Reed’s face in the darkness of his vehicle. Didn’t expect him to respond well to Thom’s order. But, after the tiniest pause, he laughed and emerged. Strode forward until he was closer to me than I was to Thom.

After all, my oath had pulled me away from the man I wanted to cling to, dragging me unwillingly back into Reed territory. My oath didn’t let me sidle away either when Chief Reed draped a possessive arm across my back. Instead, I braced myself beneath the weight of my freely given word.

“Yes?” This time when a man’s deep voice vibrated through me, it knocked my organs out of alignment. Tried to wobble my knees until I had to lock them to stay upright.

Thom noticed all of this and I expected him to argue for my release, something that I knew wouldn’t work but could have used hearing. Instead, he demanded something different. “Kira needs her things. I’ll bring them by tonight.”

“She needs nothing.” Chief Reed’s arm on my back grew heavier with the weight of not just my oath but his intentions also. One murder down, how many to go? “Do you really think,” he continued, “that I’m unable to supply clothes and toiletries for my heir?”

The point was unarguable, so Thom didn’t argue it. Instead, he pointed toward the Gate City side of the roadblock and tossed out his ace in the hole. “Your grandniece is still over there.”

“Keep her. She’s not worth much.”

Thom’s nostrils flared, but he didn’t address Chief Reed’s lack of family values. Instead, he refocused his demands on me. “Kira is under my protection. I won’t send her away empty-handed.”

The words Thom uttered were heavier than Chief Reed’s arm, so why did they make me feel so much lighter? Unfortunately, the effect lasted mere seconds. Then Chief Reed shrugged, the gesture counteracting the headiness of Thom’s growl. “If you wish, drop her possessions off here. I’ll leave someone to wait for them.”

After that, he steered me back toward his vehicle. Away from Thom, away from the pack who, I could hope, would find Ava while I was serving out an oath I’d sworn without thinking through the consequences.

As we got into a car that reeked of alpha musk and trickery, I could see Thom standing unmoving as the mountain that cast us all into shadow. When Chief Reed turned the car to head back up to his villa, I swiveled to crane my neck back toward the man who hadn’t moved a muscle since I left him.

Thom was still standing, still watching, when the road curved north to block him from sight.