Kurotaki was singing along cheerily to Eloise as he drove, the whole thing surreal even before he broke up an octave for the chorus. I was slumped in the back seat, my head propped up by the window. My aches and pains were crying out for attention but I wasn’t responding. And I wasn’t thinking of ways to escape.
I’d run out of bright ideas. I’d pushed myself to my limit and failed. I was now resigned to my fate.
Takata looked up as I entered his office and ushered me to my seat.
‘I thought we agreed you were going home.’
‘We did,’ I answered, too drained for an apology. ‘I’ve got my ticket. I was ready to go.’
‘But you didn’t. You went looking for your girlfriend instead.’
‘I found something with her work address on it. I couldn’t help it; I had to try.’
‘And what did you find out?’
I wondered what his point was. I couldn’t see why he would want me to tell him what he must already know.
‘Not very much. I know they were involved in Tomoe’s disappearance but that’s about it.’
‘And what were they so keen to get from you?’
‘They wanted documents they think Tomoe left behind.’
‘And what documents are these?’
He was looking at me keenly. I knew the answer would decide my fate but I could think of nothing to tell him but the truth.
‘There are no documents. I had to pretend I had something so they’d let me in. Documents were the first thing that came to my mind.’ I rubbed my eyes. I was exhausted. My mind and body had had enough. ‘I don’t have anything.’
He turned and stared into space. I wondered what would happen next. Probably a call out to his underlings so they could come in, take me and do whatever they were going to do. At any other time, I would have been terrified and it would be wrong to say I wasn’t scared. But it felt as though the sensors in my brain had been disconnected and I was looking in on someone else’s fear.
‘You had an opportunity to get out,’ he said. ‘There was no need for you to be involved. I gave you that chance.’
‘You did.’
‘But you didn’t take it. You dived in and unfortunately for you that changed things. There’s no longer an escape. You’re either going to sink or swim.’
I had no idea what he was talking about.
‘I’m sorry, I don’t understand. I know I wasn’t supposed to do anything but I didn’t think there would be any harm in going to her office. I didn’t find out anything and there’s nothing anyone can find out from me.’
I felt a flash of pain from where Knifeman had hit me and put my hand to my cheek.
‘I still have my plane ticket for tomorrow. If you don’t want me around it would be easier to let me use it than do anything else.’
As pleas for one’s life go it wasn’t exactly impassioned, but in the circumstances it wasn’t such a bad attempt. But Takata just looked at me, a hint of a smile playing at the corners of his mouth.
‘You think we’re planning to kill you?’
‘Aren’t you? Isn’t that what this is about?’
‘No, it isn’t,’ he said. ‘You’re not here to die.’
My brain slowly absorbed his words, my joy at them as detached as my earlier fear.
‘You’re here to join us. You’re going to become a yakuza.’
When I’d been at the office the week before, I feared being killed but had been hopeful of coming away with my life. I’d left the building in a short-term state of euphoria, a feeling unlike any I’d experienced before. This time I’d been certain of death. The release from its jaws left me bewildered. This twist confused me even more.
‘Now of course you’ll play a different role to someone like Kurotaki – you don’t have quite the same skills. But that’s not something to worry about. Kurotaki and his like are the visible face of what we do and, aside from the fact that we need men of that ilk, that’s no bad thing. They reassure the public and help maintain the impression of gamblers and peddlers; rough men who ultimately live by an honourable code.
‘But as we discussed, we need to be able to move in the circles where real power is exercised. For that we need specialists. In this case, it means people like you.’
If he was hoping to clarify the situation, he failed.
‘English teachers?’
‘No, not English teachers. We’ll talk about the details another time. Right now, you need to rest. You thought you were going to die and now you know you’re going to live. It’s something I’ve experienced and it’s not to be taken lightly. You need some space to yourself.’
I did feel light-headed. But while time on my own sounded welcome, I was confident I still wouldn’t want to be a yakuza when it was up.
‘Thank you for your understanding – I do feel a little drained.’
I paused to consider how to continue but I wasn’t capable of gauging nuance at that point so I dived straight in.
‘Of course, it’s nothing against your organisation, but what would happen if I thought I wasn’t entirely well suited to being a yakuza? I’m not sure I have any skills that can help.’
‘It wouldn’t really matter because I’m telling you that you do. You know I said you had the chance to sink or swim? Well, this is the swim. Don’t choose to sink – it would be an unnecessary waste.’
He said it in the same even tone he always spoke in, but the implication was clear, even in my state.
‘You need to stop overthinking. Accept where your actions have brought you and make the most of it. There’s no need to look so concerned. We’re a diverse, dynamic organisation – you’ll find us far less one-dimensional than perhaps you expect.
‘So perhaps you weren’t anticipating your career path would lead you this way. You’re not alone – there are plenty of others who needed a little encouragement at first. But if you approach it with an open mind and give it your all, you’ll have an interesting and rewarding career. I mean, this teaching thing, you can’t do it for ever.’
Career advice upon being forcibly enrolled in the yakuza. It anything marked the death knell of normality, it was surely this.
‘But I’m a gaijin.’
‘You have no argument from me on that.’
‘Don’t I have to be Japanese?’
‘Not at all – we’re the equal opportunities employer of Japan. We take in Koreans, Chinese, the burakumin underclass; we’ve even got a scattering of westerners too.’
He backtracked a little.
‘They tend to be associates rather than full members though, so you could find yourself in the minority on that front. But quite frankly, it doesn’t matter. This is my organisation and I decide who joins.’
The stimulus being thrown its way was slowly bringing my brain back to life. Unfortunately, its functioning was unpredictable as it worked its way up the gears.
‘But you killed my girlfriend’s father and abducted her.’
His face clouded. ‘I thought I told you that wasn’t us?’
‘But your men turned up at Tomoe’s work the minute they were called.’
‘Those men weren’t Takata-gumi.’
‘What do you mean? Who were they?’
‘Clarence-san,’ I wasn’t sure where he’d found out my surname but I suppose it wasn’t surprising considering they’d discovered my address. ‘You haven’t just been trampling over my territory; you’ve been making yourself an irritant to other people as well. You announced yourself with a bang. You’ve shaken things up.’
‘But, but who, wh-what have I done?’
‘The company your girlfriend worked for isn’t in my portfolio – other parties have an interest in them. The reason you’re here now, probably the reason you’re still in one piece, is because I have a network that provides us with information on occasion, as it did in this case. We’ve been keeping an eye on you. Once we knew you’d escaped, we assumed you’d head back to your flat. As that is in my territory, we were able to get there first.’
I’d gone from being a nobody teacher no one knew, to a prospective yakuza with God knows how many gangsters after my life.
‘But what’s to stop them hurting me now?’ My voice quivered. I couldn’t face a Groundhog Day version of the last week. ‘I’m not a gangster. I can’t live like this.’
‘Well, strictly speaking you will be a gangster soon,’ said Takata. ‘And actually, that’s what’s going to stop them. Anyone who comes after a Takata-gumi member faces repercussions.’
He gave a phlegmatic shrug.
‘Although if they can get you without it being obvious they’ll probably try.’
If he was attempting to reassure me he wasn’t going about it in the best way.
‘Fortunately, we operate a buddy system for our new joiners so you’ll have the protection of a Takata-gumi member as well as its name.’
A gangster bodyguard. That did make me feel better.
‘Anyway, I think that’s all for now. Under the circumstances, I think it will be better to bring you on board sooner rather than later so we’ll do the ceremony in the next couple of days. The boys will take care of you now.’
I was at the door before I realised I had one last question.
‘Who’s my buddy?’