Thirty-Five
"What are you doing sitting out here alone? You should come join us." I recognised both Jill's voice and the woman herself, even though she wore her casual clothes and not her hospital uniform. She blocked the doorway to the veranda.
"Ah, I'm..." Aidan began, half turning in his seat to face her.
Jill nodded slowly. "She left for Perth early yesterday. Cleared out of the house without a trace. Forget her, Aidan. She's gone."
Aidan's face twisted, as if he wasn't sure what to say or what expression he should wear. My heart twisted, too, in response to his obvious pain.
"She's the ice queen. Calm and collected in the most stressful of procedures, but a heart of ice in everything else, too. She was too cold for you to touch, Aidan. You should come inside and join us, instead of sitting here alone."
Me. The ice queen was me, a name I'd heard used for how precisely I could handle a difficult birth. It meant more than I'd thought. Cold that could shut out Aidan. Not any more.
I pushed the door open wider, excusing myself as I slipped past Jill with my eyes on the ground.
"There you are, Bel," Aidan said in relief.
I lifted my eyes to his face and met his relieved smile with my own much warmer one. Too cold for him to touch? Don't you dare say that about Aidan. I leaned down to kiss him as my hands placed the glassware on the table.
His lips touched mine in what he seemed to think was only going to be a perfunctory peck, but I persisted, lips parted and tongue poised, until he realised I had something more passionate in mind.
A minute or maybe three passed before I pulled away, to the sound of Jill's uncomfortable cough. I turned to face her, my hand clasped tightly in Aidan's. "We sat outside because it was a bit too crowded inside and we wanted to be alone for a bit." I smiled down at Aidan, the look in his eyes returning every drop of my warmth for him.
Jill sounded uncertain. "Well, there's space for you inside, if you two want to come in and join us." She retreated inside to the fire.
I kept hold of his hand as I slid into my seat. With my spare hand, I took another piece of the spicy sausage and popped it into my mouth. Now I was prepared for it, the burn was barely perceptible.
Aidan snorted and poured us each a glass of water. He gulped his down, before saying, "You should try some of the chicken, too. And the spring rolls, before I eat them all."
I did as he suggested, but I barely tasted any of them. I ate until I was full. All that remained was the chocolate whiskey.
Aidan didn't say a word 'til I'd finished eating. He just watched me, with a rueful smile on his face. When I was done, he asked, "Would you like to go inside, by the fire, with everyone else?" His eyes held yearning, but also understanding.
He wants to go inside, to the room full of people.
I hesitated. "I..."
"I usually sit on the sofa near the fire – most of the other regulars are happy to let me have the same spot, every week. We can sit in a corner, as far away from everyone as possible, if you like, or we can claim my spot by the fire. If they won't make space for you, you can sit on my lap." He grinned wickedly.
I felt lost. I didn't want to go inside and be the centre of attention.
Somehow, Aidan understood. "Or we can stay out here in the cold, if that's what you want," he added gently. "Let's have the last sip of whiskey." He lifted his tiny glass and clinked it against mine, before taking a sip.
I don't like the cold and I want to be warm with him. Wherever that may be.
I looked up into his eyes as I drained my glass. Chocolate fire on my tongue, I leaned across the table to kiss Aidan again. I didn't want the kiss to end. But it did, as his cold fingers touched my neck.
"Let's go inside," my voice said of its own volition. I want your hands as warm as they were on my skin this morning.
I pushed away from the table and stood up, stepping forward to stand by Aidan's side. He curled an arm around me and kissed me briefly. "Thank you, Bel," he murmured.
My heart swelled. "You're welcome," I said slowly, for the first time. His arm a comforting weight around my waist, I led the way inside.