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Exton slammed the door behind him carelessly. “I can’t believe this,” he muttered.
He had hoped—foolishly, he now knew—that in seeking Tyler out, he could permanently delay a conversation with Cal and Brock. Finding Tyler had taken him longer than he’d liked, but in between updates on Meredith and the rest of Tyler’s family, Exton had not been able to find any useful information about what went wrong in the rest of the fighters, or if anyone else was thought to have survived.
Grudgingly and gingerly, he made his way down to the med ward to have the conversation he’d hoped to avoid.
Only to be turned out of the room by Petra’s own medical team as they finished checking up on Brock and Cal’s conditions. He was told he would have to wait while the techs were finished removing some of the steel-enforced glass that had managed to wriggle its way up Cal’s arm. It could take up to an hour, Tyra said.
Two hours and multiple rounds around the ward later, he was still waiting.
“Well, it’s real, whether or not you like it.”
Exton narrowed his eyes over at Serena, as she leaned against the counter in the med ward. “You might look like Merra,” he said, “but she would at least be a little bit nicer about telling me no.”
Serena smirked. “I’m glad to hear there are significant differences between me and my mother, thanks. Besides, I don’t know what you’re complaining about. It’s not me that’s stopping you,” she said. “It’s your other medical supervisors.”
“You’re part of the team now, too, whether you like it or not.”
“Well, I don’t like that I’m stuck on the same ‘team’ as you,” Serena countered, “but I don’t actually mind helping people who need it.”
“Well, good. You might learn to disregard me one day.” Exton frowned at the door, where, only moments earlier, he’d been told that he would have to wait while the patients were in the process of getting treated for their injuries. “Just like some of my medical staff has, apparently.”
“I thought you were in charge,” Serena said. She turned and started putting away the med supplies she’d brought in from the hangar.
Exton knew by just looking a new shipment had come in from some of their traders.
“I am, which makes this all the more irritating,” Exton assured her. “I wanted to ask Brock and Cal some questions. Both of them seem more worried about their cuts and scrapes than giving me potentially vital information.”
“Well, they did answer your questions and the others on the way back from Panama,” Serena pointed out. “They probably figure that they’ve done their part.”
“I just wanted to make certain,” Exton said.
“They just lost their comrades in arms,” Serena replied. She continued to unpack the supply cart she had behind her with methodical precision. “Among them was my mother and another brother. You might as well let them rest a bit longer and give them a day.”
“Why aren’t you taking the day off?” Exton scoffed.
“The URS has done a brilliant job in training me,” Serena said. She gave him a sneer, but it was a sad one this time. “We are trained in the medic professions to disregard human life. We fight for it, and we strive to keep it, but we are taught not to get emotionally attached to it.”
“That doesn’t sound much different from the military,” Exton said, thinking of his time under St. Cloud’s tutelage.
“Of course it’s different. In the military, you’re putting your life on the line to either save someone else or destroy someone else. It’s hard not to think of life as vital, and to even take pride in it,” Serena said. “But as a doctor, or nurse, or combat medic, I can only help someone survive. It’s not me in the end who has the final say. So there’s no emotional connection.”
“I’m surprised you would choose it then,” Exton said, making her turn around.
There was a stricken look on her face.
“You seem too willing to emotionally engage in things here.”
“I guess it is nice,” Serena admitted after a moment of silence. “I wasn’t allowed to do this at home much. I would sneak out with my friends to loosen up before.”
“We still need you to do your job, and to keep the peace as much as possible with the people here,” Exton said. “But other than that, it would be nice to see more of who you truly are.”
Serena’s mouth opened and closed a few times before she responded. When she finally replied, it was with a contrite look in her eyes. “I can see why Aerie wanted to keep you.”
Exton winced at her words, saying nothing as she finished unpacking her supplies. When she was done, she nodded to him; it was the slightest, smallest hint of a nod, but Exton managed to catch the respect behind it.
He felt a sense of relief, in many ways, but he had to wonder if it was his office or his marriage to Aerie which had earned her respect.
Finally, seemingly hours later, the door behind him opened. “Captain?”
Exton looked over his shoulder to see Tyra, one of the many med technicians, as she came out of the room. Others, no doubt students from the Ecclesia, followed her.
“We’re finished, sir,” Tyra said. “We had to remove some fragments from Cal’s arm. You can go and see them now.”
“Thank you,” Exton said, his voice brusque as he hurried inside.
One look from Brock and Cal’s face clearly told him that his visit was undesired. In fact, Exton thought, he had a feeling he didn’t want to be there anymore than he suspected Brock and Cal wanted to see him.
“Gentlemen,” he said, trying to start out on more professional footing. It was too easy to see that Brock, while his arm was bandaged and there was an IV in it, was more than willing to put up a fight. And Cal had always been the more blustery brother; he’d never enjoyed answering any of Exton’s questions without going off-topic or insulting him.
Exton hoped that the untimely demise of his family members and his other comrades in arms might temper that impulse some.
It was a stretch, he knew.
“What are you doing here?” Brock spat. “I was hoping to rest some. We’ve had a long two days, if you haven’t heard.”
“I’ve been informed of the mission,” Exton replied sharply. “I’m trying to figure out why it happened.”
Cal snorted softly. “The other ships all lost control while we were protecting the target,” he said. “Seems like a systems failure to me.”
“Your ships didn’t go down,” Exton pointed out. “Everyone else’s did.”
“So?” Cal shrugged. “Maybe ours were the only ones that were working properly.”
“Or maybe your ships were the only ones which weren’t working properly.”
When Cal only gave him a scowl, and then turned his gaze to stare at the far wall, Exton turned to Brock.
“I wanted to ask about the NETech,” Exton said. “Can you tell me if it was activated in your fighters?”
Brock frowned and ignored him, while Cal sank deeper into the thin sheet on his bed.
“Well?” Exton sighed. “I need to know, so we can see about protecting others.”
“Mine wasn’t,” Cal finally said. “I know because when the comm lines were going fuzzy, I wasn’t able to connect to the others with the NET system.”
“I thought Dorian had deactivated his a while ago,” Exton said.
“He did. We just switched ships,” Cal admitted. “We like to play games like that sometimes. We don’t have a lot of fun in the URS. We were able to get away with switching from time to time.”
Brock snorted. “Not all the time.”
“I never said all the time,” Cal snapped. He turned back to Exton. There was an apologetic look in his eyes. “We didn’t mean any harm. It was our way of having fun.”
For a long moment, Exton felt old. He was nearly three years older than Aerie’s brothers, and even older than Brock. He had forgotten how it felt to be free from the control—the seemingly endless, all-consuming ways the State managed to exhort its influence on the young and old alike. Even before that, he knew he’d had the advantage of the protection offered from his own family, and their community. Aerie’s family, and her friends, had no such protection; if anything, because of their family’s position under Osgood, they likely had even less.
“I can imagine that it’s hard to come by fun when everything is about survival,” Exton said quietly. “I know from experience how it’s never considered a priority. Either way, it’s not your fault that Dorian’s ship went down.”
“If anything, it’s the State’s fault,” Brock said. “After all, they are your enemy, aren’t they? It would have to be their fault that they killed a bunch of our people by hacking their planes. Maybe you should have thought about that possibility before sending us out to die in compromised fighters.”
Before Exton could ask him what he thought happened, Cal turned to Brock. “You were the one who told me to make sure the NET was disable in the fighter. You should’ve checked the rest of them.”
Exton narrowed his eyes at Brock. “Why did you tell them to disconnect the NETech?”
Even from behind, Exton knew Brock was radiating fury as he searched for the right words. “I know the URS can use it to spy on people,” Brock admitted.
“You know they can spy on us?”
Cal shot up straight in his bed. “You knew they could use the NET to do a bunch of other stuff, too, didn’t you? That’s why you told me and Dorian to disable ours. I thought mine was already disabled, and he thought his was already disabled, too, but his wasn’t. That’s why he died, isn’t it?”
When Brock said nothing, Cal lunged out of his bed and onto Brock. The IV in Cal’s arm ripped free, and blood spotted the floor as Exton fought to separate them.
Tyra and several other med techs came rushing in at the noise.
“That’s enough,” she yelled, and the whole room seemed to stop at her announcement. “You two need to rest. Captain, if this is taking up too much of their energy, then I must insist you wait to ask them any further questions.”
He frowned, but seeing Cal’s seething expression and Brock’s shameful blush, he decided he had enough information for now. He had been right about the NETech, and there was nothing to suggest that anything else had been the cause. For now.
“Alright,” he said, nodding to Tyra. “I’d get these guys in separate rooms, however. On top level lockdown, too, please.”
“Yes, Captain.”
Exton headed out of the med ward, glad to be free. He never liked to be in a med ward, unless it was to go and visit Aerie.
He pulled out his own comm device again, wondering if he should call her. Looking at the time, he knew she was supposed to be asleep still, resting up for the day shift.
Exton was glad when, a moment later, the comm started beeping. He almost laughed, startled by the noise. He answered it with expectation. “Aerie?”
“It’s me,” she replied.
“I was just thinking of you,” he said. He felt his face tighten as he smiled, thinking of how long of a day he’d had. And it wasn’t even over yet. He knew he still had plenty to do, but hearing Aerie’s voice was a tonic to his shattered world. He glanced at the time again and realized how tired she sounded. “Did you have trouble sleeping?”
“Yes,” she admitted. “But it’s okay. I was going to have a bad night as it was.”
“I’m sorry I’m not there.”
“No, it’s not that. I mean, it would be really nice if you were here, but Gerard ended up hailing the Perdition and he wanted to talk to me.”
“To you?”
“Yes.”
Exton felt his grip on the comm device tighten, and he wished he could do something equally vicious to the man who caused his beloved wife such pain. “What did he say?”
“My mom is alive.”
“Oh. Well. That’s good.” He bristled at his own detached tone. Hadn’t he just been talking to Serena about the very same thing? It was good Aerie’s mother was alive, and he shouldn’t have to berate himself into sounding like it.
Aerie didn’t seem to notice his flippancy. “I don’t think my brother is, though,” she said. “I know Brock said Cal was the only one who was with him.”
“I’m sorry,” Exton said. He was just about to tell her he had just come from meeting with them, but she continued on before he could tell her.
“I don’t want to think about it now,” Aerie said. “I know if I do, I’ll likely go crazy. I don’t know how you did this for so long.”
“We didn’t do so much active warfare before,” he said, trying to brush it off.
“Still, I don’t know how you did it.”
“I don’t either.” He didn’t want to tell her the truth; he’d only done it to survive, and now that she was with him, that she was safe, there was something greater than just revenge waiting for him at last. Exton knew she would be happy that he had something more to hope for now, but he didn’t want her to realize how deeply the monster inside of him lay, and how close it had been to devouring the rest of him. “Tell me what else Gerard told you.”
“He said they used the NETech to do something to the fighters that made them crash.”
Exton shook his head, feeling silly as he realized Aerie couldn’t see him. “I know,” he said. “I had a feeling that was it, anyway. I just talked to Brock and Cal about it. They more or less confirmed that theory.”
“You saw them? Spoke to them? How are they?” Aerie asked. “I wasn’t close with my brothers, but I know Cal is probably upset. He and Dorian have never been apart for very long. And I don’t even know how Brock would feel.”
“Probably like it is his fault, which it is,” Exton replied, trying to hold back his snarl. He thought of Brock’s attempts to brush off the incident and felt a wave of anger stir inside him once more.
“What? Why would it be Brock’s fault?” Aerie asked. “He was with them when it happened. There’s no way he could’ve known about anything.”
She was upset and likely shocked; Exton decided it was better to direct her away from that conversation. Petra was built to withstand incidents of rebellion and treason; Aerie was not, especially when it was one of her oldest and dearest friends at the center of controversy.
“Never mind,” Exton said, interrupting her as she listed off reasons why Brock was the victim, rather than the victimizer. “He’s fine, too. They just moved him into his own room to get some rest.”
“Are you sure? Because I know that you don’t exactly trust him or anything like—”
“I’m sure,” he said. “Back to Gerard, please. What else did he say?”
“He said that he was willing to trade Merra for you and the General.” Aerie sighed. “I told him no. He’s given us three days to think it over.”
“Well, I’m tempted to give him your dad,” Exton said. “But I do think he’s asking for too much. He doesn’t even know how we feel about Merra.”
“She’s my mother,” Aerie said, her voice flat with disappointment. “And he knows how much my father cares for her, thanks to my stepmother.”
“Your stepmother?”
“Yeah. She’s apparently with him at Panama right now.”
Exton thought about the ecobombs that had likely gone off at Panama. “I think he’s trying to force our hand,” he said. “I’ll have Emery pull up the maps, but I’m willing to bet the bombs went off.”
“Bombs? What bombs?” The shock in Aerie’s tone returned, this time underscored by worry rather than suspicion.
Exton had a feeling he wasn’t going to be able to tell her the truth. She wasn’t going to be able to stomach it—not without blaming him.
Well, I am to blame. Aren’t I? Exton hung his head. If he’d been more diligent, he would have waited to find out more about the ship before sending in their small squadron of fighters and a rescue shuttle. Had he known Merra had most likely been the one to organize its departure, he wouldn’t have sent anyone to rescue it.
“Exton? Tell me the truth.”
It was almost as if she knew he was finding a way to keep it from her, he thought. Sometimes Aerie seemed to know him too well.
“We found out that there were ecobombs on the Freedom,” he told her. “According to my sources, your mother was the one who organized everything, including its destination.”
Aerie said nothing, and instantly, he was concerned.
“Are you okay?” he asked her a moment later.
“She said she had a way to make you release my father,” Aerie said.
“What? When did she tell you that?” Shock hit Exton, hard and fast.
“When she came up here to see you,” Aerie answered. “She talked to me some in the Biovid before going to see you.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Exton felt the rising tide of rage inside of him, and he knew there was very little that would hold it back at this point.
“I didn’t think anything of it at the time,” Aerie continued. “I know you can be very effective at putting your foot down, Exton. But now, Gerard has her and he’s asking for my father and you as a hostage swap. I didn’t think she would do something this extreme, but—”
“But nothing,” Exton growled. “She managed to get herself captured and nearly the rest of the fighter pilots killed, too. I lost some of my best people, Aerie.”
“I know this is terrible, Exton—”
“This is more than terrible,” he argued, cutting her off. “This is dangerous. Your family is dangerous, Aerie. Your mother didn’t count on Gerard using the NETech to override her legion, and because of that, we lost people and we lost the battle. And because the ship was in the Caribbean in the first place, the ecobombs have detonated and now it’s leaking poison through the URS camps.”
“My mother was only trying to win the war against them,” Aerie pushed back. “She’s on your team.”
“She might be on our team, but she’s playing by her own rules.”
“She still had good intentions.”
“You’re really going to defend her, knowing she caused a lot of people to die needlessly? That’s weak, Aerie, and not worthy of you.”
“Isn’t that the same thing that your father tried to do?”
Her rebuttal was striking, and Exton felt his heart barely survive the blow.
“Well?” Aerie demanded. “Isn’t it?”
“That was low,” he growled. “My father is the only reason that we’re alive today.”
“Well, he still wanted to kill a few hundred thousand people,” Aerie argued, her voice clearly edged by her own anger. “He was planning on it, according to what the General told you. I don’t see how your father is that much different from my mother.”
“My father still didn’t deserve to die. Your mother is getting exactly what she deserves,” Exton snapped.
“How can you say that?” Aerie’s tone was sharper now. Exton was glad he couldn’t see her face, because he was certain that her eyes were full of angry tears.
“This is real life, Aerie,” he said. “This is war. And this is the price you pay when you’re fighting the world for something you want! You risk everything—everything—for a slim chance at what you want. And in the end, you still might not get it, even if you still pay for it.”
“You’re talking in circles, Exton. You’re not making sense. By your own logic, it would seem that the General did the right thing in stopping your father.”
He had to take another deep breath to steady himself. “Even if it’s true that my father was planning on attacking the URS with the Perdition, he was stopped. We’re not dealing with hypotheticals. Your mother was not stopped, and now an ecobomb is likely poisoning half the Caribbean. And our fighters are still gone.”
“It’s still the same, Exton. Your father wouldn’t have been killed if he wasn’t doing something wrong,” Aerie insisted.
“You don’t know that!” Exton shouted into the comm. “You don’t even know if he was doing something wrong.”
“My father told me what he told you,” Aerie said. “I know you don’t believe him, but I do, after hearing what he had to say. Don’t you?”
Exton gritted his teeth together. “I’m not talking about that with you,” he growled. “I’m not talking about it. Go and talk about it with St. Cloud if you want to talk about it.”
“We wouldn’t be talking about it if you would just do something about my mom. Who gets to decide who has to die, Exton? Who decides who has to pay?” Aerie asked.
Exton tried to brush her question aside, but it was difficult. He knew that she had a point, but he didn’t want to face the reality of it right now. He had other priorities that demanded his attention, and as much as he felt for Aerie, seeing her mother’s capture, he had to assess the damage that came along with the events leading up to her capture.
“We have to rescue my mother,” Aerie continued. “Gerard has her imprisoned. They’re going to torture her. Just like they did to me, Exton.”
He sighed. He didn’t want her thinking that he didn’t care about her. But there were other factors to consider.
“Right now, we can’t do anything. We’re still collecting information here,” Exton said. “We are still deciding what to do. No definite plans have been made.”
“My mother doesn’t deserve to be tortured, Exton,” Aerie insisted. “I know that for sure.”
“I’m sorry, Aerie.”
Aerie must have caught the lack of sympathy in his voice. “You’re not seriously thinking of leaving her there, are you?”
He sighed. “Aerie, this is war. Sometimes people get left behind. You’re the one who told me earlier that you’d already lost her once.”
“I can’t believe you,” she hissed.
“I’m just telling you the truth,” Exton snapped. “We have to wait for more information to come in. There’s plenty we need to know before we do anything at all. Maybe if I had known sooner that your mom wanted to poison the Caribbean Sea, we wouldn’t be where we are now.”
Aerie sank into a bitter silence, saying nothing in reply.
“I’ve lost people, too, Aerie. Gerard is proof of that.”
“I don’t care about that right now,” Aerie said. “What are we going to do?” There was a hint of desperation in her voice now.
He said nothing. He had already given his answer. He rubbed his forehead, trying not to hate her in that moment; he was sorely tempted to yell at her some more, trying to hurt her as much as she had hurt him. Silence was the easiest answer for now, and also the least condemning.
“Well?” Aerie demanded. “Are we going to attack? Stage a rescue mission? What?”
“We don’t have the resources to do that,” Exton said.
“I can do it then,” Aerie offered.
“No.” Exton’s voice was sharp and scalding. “No, you will not do anything, Aerie. Do you hear me? I will not have you put yourself in harm’s way. Not after everything we’ve been through, and especially not after all the trouble your mother has caused.”
“But she’s my mother!” Aerie insisted.
“I know, but the answer is still no. Do not disobey me on this, Aerie. You’ve seen what Gerard can do.”
“Exactly! That’s all the more reason to do something!”
Exton scoffed. “If you go, you could just make things worse for us, Aerie. You might have some training, but you still don’t know what to do or what kind of powers you’re up against.”
“But—”
It was time to hang up before he said something he would regret even more. “There is no easy answer for these things, Aerie,” he said. “I’ll talk with you later.”
Exton didn’t say goodbye before he clicked off the comm.