11

 

WE BOTH HEARD THE sound of a baby crying, at the same time.

We stopped and stared at each other. Then Mrs. Lacey said, “Hurry.” And she betook herself across the flat dry ground toward the only remaining building as if she were fourteen again. It was an old two-story, crumbling building. I followed her.

Inside, on the first floor, she led me to a small room that had holes in the walls that gave a magnificent view but also let in the cold.

On the floor, huddled in old dusty blankets, was a young woman. The baby was wailing out its misery, for it was that time of day when the cold started to descend.

“Oh, Mrs. Lacey,” she said, reaching out her hand. “Oh, you have come. Madre de Dios, I thought you would never come.”

Never had I seen such a beautiful woman in my life. Her face had the sweet roundness of perfection to it. Her eyes were so blue they would make the sky jealous. Her hair was richly dark and fell about her shoulders where it had become unpinned.

In her arms she held a tiny likeness of herself. A newborn baby. It had stopped crying now and was mewing like a cat.

“Delvina, Delvina, child. How did you have this baby by yourself? And when?”

“Last night,” she said in a gentle voice tinged with tiredness. “But I was not alone. Lozen was here. She helped me.”

“Lozen! Oh, I wish I had seen her. How good of her. And when did she leave?”

“She stayed the night with me. She fetched water, made a fire. See? There are the remains.” She pointed, and sure enough, the charred remains of a wood fire sat nearby.

Then she noticed me. “Ah, this is the muchachita bonita who comes with you every day to visit Robert’s grave, is she not?”

“Yes, this is Lizzy Enders.”

“Hello, Lizzy, how are you?”

“How are you?” I asked. “You need help. Sister Roberta at the school wanted me to ask you when you expected your lying-in.”

“Tell Sister Roberta it came sooner than expected.”

“I’ve brought blankets. Here.” I spread them over her. “But you and the baby need to get into someplace proper and warm. Sister Roberta wants you to come to the convent. She said they have a place for you.”

“Oh, I don’t know. It wouldn’t be safe.”

“It’s safer than here.”

“For everyone in the convent, I mean. If my husband finds out I’m there, there’s no telling what evil he’ll try to do.”

“The Bishop is back,” I told her. I thought of the Bishop’s strong, distinguished face, of his no-nonsense manner. “He won’t let any harm come to anyone. You must come today!” I appealed to Mrs. Lacey. “Please!”

“Lizzy is right. And she is going to get on her horse right now and ride back and have a wagon brought for you and the child. Aren’t you, Lizzy?”

I got up. “Yes.”

Delvina lay back on the blankets. “I’m afraid I’m not as strong as I thought,” she said. “I don’t feel well. So all I can hope is that the nuns will find a place for my baby.”

I was already running across the ground toward Ben. “I’ll be back very soon,” I yelled over my shoulder.

 

BLACK SHADOWS ALREADY LAY in the lee of adobe walls as I rode Ben back through town. It was against the law to race your mount in the street. I had been told that by Mother Magdalena. Weariness sat on my shoulders and on top of my head as I walked Ben as fast as I could. I thought about the other law Sister Roberta had told me about the day she told me to keep her apprised of Delvina’s condition.

“Midwives must be licensed in Santa Fe. And that license must be granted by a municipal judge. Also, they must have a certificate from their parish priest that says they know how to administer baptism. That’s why we must get her back here. She must have a proper midwife.”

I giggled, wondering if Lozen would be considered licensed.

Then I frowned, worrying about the baby. I hadn’t even asked if it was a boy or girl. And suppose it died before we got it back to the convent? It would end up in Limbo. And I would be blamed. I should have brought it along with me and not left it in the cold. But then I wouldn’t be able to manage Ben so well.

Maybe I or Mrs. Lacey should have baptized the baby. Was it possible for a heretic to do so? Oh, I was so tired and confused! I’d been on the run since early this morning, I’d scarce slept last night, and my head buzzed with weariness. I rode past the plaza. The last of the merchants were packing up their wares. Some Indians from nearby pueblos, who also came to sell, had wrapped themselves in blankets to guard the meat they would leave hanging overnight in the cold. It hung on ropes suspended from the portal of the Governor’s Palace. I knew those shapes were venison, turkey, and even bear. But they took on a dark, menacing appearance.

I passed the U.S. Army quartermaster’s depot, two blocks from the convent. “We’re almost there, Ben,” I said.

When I got inside the gates of the school, the first person I saw was Gregorio. I was so glad to see him that I slipped off Ben, nearly fell, and he came to help me up.

“Muchachita, what has happened? Where is Mrs. Lacey?”

I was unsteady on my feet and held on to Ben as I blurted out my story. Then I collapsed.

Gregorio carried me inside. I protested, but he would not listen. In through the kitchen, where he shouted for his wife. “Bring her to the nuns. Get Bishop Lamy from his supper!”

In the next minute the whole place became alive with mayhem. Ramona sat me at the table and sent a servant for Mother Magdalena and the Bishop. Both came into the kitchen and I told my story again. Bishop Lamy didn’t shilly-shally. He ordered Gregorio to get out the wagon and go and fetch home Mrs. Lacey, the baby, and Delvina. Sister Roberta was to go with him. She ran for some remedies.

“I want to go, too, please,” I begged. “They won’t know where to find them.”

“They know where the fort is,” Bishop Lamy spoke kindly but firmly. “And the deserted building. That woman Delvina should have been brought here sooner.” He turned to Mother Magdalena.

“You know who her husband is, Your Eminence,” she said. “I couldn’t endanger my girls.”

“This is my church,” he said. “And my school and convent. It is a safe house. A place of asylum.” Then he stopped himself. If he was going to have a difference of opinion with Mother Magdalena, he would save it until later. He looked at me. “This child is exhausted,” he said.

“She went with Sister Roberta this afternoon to pick herbs.” It was Elinora. All the girls who boarded were in the kitchen now, too. It was supper hour, and they’d come in from the student dining room to see what the fuss was about.

“I told you, Elinora,” the Bishop said, “that you were to keep silent the rest of this day, did I not?”

Elinora flushed, sniffed, and went back to the dining room. Apparently she and her uncle had had their little “talk.” She did not look at all happy.

“Who delivered the baby?” the Bishop then asked me.

I had hoped nobody would ask. But he was smart, this bishop. I looked up at him mutely, hoping he would not insist. He saw something in my face, I suppose.

“Tell me, child.”

I knew everyone was staring at me, but felt only the eyes of the Bishop, pulling the truth out of me like a bad tooth. “She said Lozen,” I told him.

He showed no surprise. He did not ask who Lozen was. Others did. “Who? Who?” The question went around the room until the Bishop held up his hand to silence everyone.

“Feed this child,” he then told Ramona. “Some of that good sopa de vermicile, then see that she has a hot bath and is put to bed in the guest room. Make sure she is all right. Call me if she isn’t.”

He nodded and smiled at me encouragingly. And I knew then that he knew about Lozen. I did not have to explain. He turned and left the room.

Everyone went back to their business. I ate the sopa de vermicile, which was vermicelli soup and very delicious. I was about starved. Then Ramona took me upstairs to the guest room. I’d never seen it before. It had a highpost bed. One of Gregorio’s assistants soon had a roaring fire in the hearth. Another servant filled a copper tub with hot water. I took a hot bath while Ramona went to fetch my nightgown and my clothes for the morning. I took the bath without my chemise and pantalets on and enjoyed the sensuous sudsy hot water into which Ramona had put some lavender. She came back and washed my hair, pouring more hot water over it. Then, while I sat in front of the fire in my nightdress, she dried my hair with a towel and brushed it until I was drowsy. Then she pulled back the quilt on the feather bed, left a lighted candle, and said she would be back.

I lay in the feather bed, feeling as if I were in Mama’s arms, watching the flickering shadows from the candlelight on the whitewashed walls. In a wall crevice was the Virgin, the snake under her feet. I was so weary her face looked like Mama’s. I tried to stay awake, to listen for the sound of the wagon outside when they came back with Mrs. Lacey and Delvina and the baby. But I was a weak-spined sissy-boots. And I fell asleep.