Testing Our Friendship
How dare you betray me like that. Just think, I had the nerve to think you were my friend. Well, I’m dumb no more. Us being close—that’s over,” Lynzi hastily said to me.
I was shocked. What in the world brought this on? Even though I hadn’t spoken to her since we—no, since I—told Bam when I left the two of them that day, we were fine. How that changed in a couple of days is anybody’s guess.
The friendship Lynzi and I have has been like the stock market: up one day, then down the next day without warning. So in some ways her weird reaction, though odd, didn’t surprise me too much.
I questioned with the utmost sincerity, “Lynzi, I don’t understand where this anger is coming from. Why are you trippin’? The other day we were the best of friends, and now you stand here and say I betrayed you. What’s this really all about?”
“Oh Payton Skky,” Lynzi uttered even madder than she was before, “don’t play dumb. You know what you did. So don’t act all innocent and stuff. What’s the sayin’? With friends like you, I don’t need—”
Abruptly, I cut her off and said, “I’m not your enemy, Lynzi. For weeks I’ve been going through turmoil because of your pain. Some nights I haven’t been able to sleep. Lately, you are the main focus of my prayers. Please tell me what in all that makes ME your enemy!”
She explained nothing, simply flung her head, rolled her eyes, and stormed away. Even though I hadn’t a clue of what I could have done that was so awful, I felt terrible. It was obvious that Lyn believed I had done something. Therefore, I was determined to get to the bottom of her complaint.
After just standing in the hall for about five minutes, trying to figure Lynzi out, the first period bell rung. Being that I was on the other side of the building, I took off running. I guess it wasn’t my day because as soon as I turned the corner, I bumped straight into Dr. Franklin.
He jokingly laughed, “Ah, Miss Skky, I wasn’t informed that the track team tryouts were being held this morning … in the school!”
“Doc, I’m sorry,” I gasped practically out of breath. “I’ll slow it down.”
“Slow it down? Oh no, I don’t think so. You’d better retreat to walking. Now, I am going to let you slide this time. Do not let me catch you running again, ya hear?”
“Yes sir,” I answered with a smile, as he wrote me a pass to my class.
The tardy bell rung just as I bumped into the principal. Luckily, he was in a good mood. Usually, though, he looks out for me.
It seemed like déjà vu when I saw Dymond. She too didn’t want anything to do with me. Her rationale was just as vague as Lynzi’s. Is this a conspiracy, or did I bump my head and not remember what awful deeds I had done to my girls?
I said, “Hey girl, what’s goin’ on?”
Dymond snarled, “Talk to the hand, baby ’cause the ears ain’t listening. We have nothin’ to say to one another.”
“Are you mad?” I asked as if I couldn’t read her standoffish actions.
“You know, Pay, I don’t even have the time,” Dy paused, huffed, and said, “or the energy to deal with you. You’ve really irked me!”
She then threw her hand in my face. I was livid. I started to snatch her arm and yank the heck out of it. I mean, it’s one thing to be mad at me, but it’s another to disrespect me.
After class was over, it was my mission to find Rain. Just needed a friend, I guess. Hoped she wasn’t mad as well. Walking out the door, Dymond bumped into me. That’s when I kinda lost it. I had had enough of the nonsense.
I growled, “Dy, I don’t know what your problem is. I haven’t done a thang to ya. So, why are you acting all crazy? Be real. Tell me, what’s up with the attitude?”
“I can’t believe you’re playing innocent,” she abruptly turned and said. “I tell you every piece of information I ever get. Dymond knows … Payton knows. But you, no, you don’t trust me enough to return the same courtesy. Girl, I thought you was my girrrl. Huh, now I see it was just a one-way street. I don’t have the patience or the time to drive down that road.”
Oh, was she making me mad. She didn’t give me a chance to respond. Dymond took off to her next class, with her nose held high. Obviously, our friendship meant nothing.
In the five minutes we had between classes, I was more determined than before to track Rain down. Maybe she could fill in the missing pieces, which Lyn and Dy wrongfully assumed I already knew. While scurrying to locate her, I prayed for our confrontation. I didn’t need her to freak out too.
“Rain,” I shouted as I spotted her dashing from one side of Laney High to the other. “Stop, stop—it’s me, Pay!”
As soon as she saw me, Rain flew my way. She shook her head. Right then and there, I realized something was up. But what? I thought.
“Chile,” she gasped, “I’ve been looking for you all morning. Girl, our girls had it out this morning. Worse, both of them are mad at you. But, you probably know that part by now, huh?”
I said with anger, “Yeah, I know they’re upset. But I haven’t done anything to either one of them. I’m clueless as to what this latest mess is all about. They were both vague with me. Tell me what’s going on, please.”
“I can’t talk about it now. It’s too long. I’ll hip you to it after school,” Rain voiced as if she was in a huge hurry.
I blurted out, “No, no, don’t trip. You can’t leave me hangin.’”
“OK,” Rain began, “here it is on the quick tip. I’ll go into more details later. This morning Dy cornered Lyn and went off. You know how Dymond likes to know … everything. Well, she told Lynzi that she couldn’t believe Lynzi didn’t tell her about her situation. You know, the fact that she’s pregnant and all. Of course, Lynzi was upset that she knew. Dy was hot that she didn’t know. So, they exchanged a few harsh words and Dymond stormed away. Before I could get a word in, Lynzi shouted that she was furious with you.”
“Why didn’t you say something after that?” I questioned.
Rain spoke up, “I tried! Believe me, I tried. As soon as I opened my mouth, though, Lyn walked away. She told me she didn’t want to hear me taking up for you. But listen, this will get straightened out. I got to get to class. We’ll talk.”
Well, at least I finally had a clear understanding of what was going on. Yep, now I got it. Lynzi’s upset with me ’cause she thinks I told Dymond and Rain what’s going on with her. Miss Dy is disturbed because I didn’t tell her someone else’s business. How twisted!
Surely all this mess could be put in check quickly when I spoke to them about their prospective beefs with me. So, I didn’t sweat it the rest of the day. If they wanna act all crazy about stuff I did not do and could not do, then that’s on them.
The week surely didn’t fly by this time. This was the longest Monday through Friday I’d had in a while. You would have thought I had the plague, the way everyone stayed away.
Believe me, I tried to straighten things out with my friends. But their anger towards me turned to rage. Rain and I were still cool; however, even she was a bit distant this week.
I couldn’t walk down a hall without hearing people whisper ’bout me and my crew. Misinformation, lies, and gossip were what they were spreading. And when they noticed that I could hear them, they gave fake smiles and turned away.
I prayed, “Lord, I try so hard to live right. Sure, I fall short a lot. I even admit that I don’t always think the purest thoughts. This situation, though, seems so cruel and unfair. Two people that I care about hate me. What’s up with this? Should I just forget them and press on? Is that what You’re trying to tell me? It says in Romans 8:28, ‘All things work together for the good.’ Well, I can’t dispute what it says, but ever since Lynzi came to me with this whole pregnancy thang, I’ve had one headache after another. Now, tell me, how could that possibly be good? Father, do You hear my sorrow? Help if You do, please!”
“What is she doing here?” Dymond uttered in a rude voice. We were sitting in Rain’s house, at her invitation. Neither of us knew the other would be there.
“You know what? I don’t know what’s going on here, but I did not come here to be harassed, Rain,” I voiced, basically tired of it all.
Rain spoke out, “No, no, no. Don’t get upset or ask questions ya’ll. Just bear with me and—”
The doorbell rang and interrupted her thoughts. I think both Dy and I had a clear idea of who it was. Rain left the two of us sitting alone. It felt like I was the only one there. We said nothing. We looked everywhere but at one another. Sadly, this same cold person had been my friend a week ago.
When Rain came back to the den, she wasn’t alone. Yep, I had a feeling it was Lynzi. I didn’t even look up; the fact was confirmed when her annoying voice irritated my eardrums.
“I don’t EVEN think so,” Lynzi yelled at the top of her voice.
Rain grabbed Lynzi as she tried to walk away and said, “Just sit down. Sit right down.”
Wow, I thought, here it was I assumed that Rain could care less. How wrong I was. She was trying desperately to get us all back together. I should have known I could count on her. Even if her ploy proves to be unsuccessful, I’ll never sway from trusting her motives again.
“I invited you all to sleep over because there’s a few things that I want to say,” Rain started as she huffed with nervousness.
“When I agreed to come,” Dy lashed out, “I was under the impression that my presence was the only one you needed to keep you company!”
I blurted, “In other words, she didn’t know I’d be here.”
“Believe me,” Lynzi interjected, “I wouldn’t have come if I’d known you would be here either.”
Rain, like an ambulance, came to my rescue when she said, “Come on guys. All this is ridiculous. Payton is being totally misunderstood here.”
“Chile, you just taking up fer her ’cause she yo best friend. Please, I don’t wanna hear it,” Dymond announced with her arms crossed and her head tilted.
Lynzi agreed, “Uh-huh, that’s right. It’s easy for you to say, when she did not tell any of your business.”
At that point, I might as well have been a pot of water on the stove turned too high. I was boiling! I was so hot that sweat balls were falling from my head to the floor. All week I had been trying to convince myself that I did not care what Lynzi or Dymond thought of me. With the way my body was reacting, I guess that theory stopped cooking.
“Did you ever ask Payton if she told?” Rain asked Lynzi.
Lynzi responded slowly, “I—I didn’t need to ask. Dannng, she didn’t deny the fact.”
“You never gave me a chance!” I said in a mean way.
Lynzi asked, almost dumbfounded, “What—what do you mean?”
“I’ll explain,” Rain cut in.
I had no clue what Rain was going to say. A look of confusion was on my face, not knowing what was about to come out. Shucks, I didn’t even know myself how this information got leaked. Seemed everyone in the whole darn school knew. If I were Lyn, I probably would have thought she spread my business too.
That’s the thing; I never said a word to anyone. I’ve racked my brain to figure who told. No one else knew!
Rain said, “Well, I was trying to determine how this all happened. ’Cause if Payton told me she didn’t say anything, then I know she didn’t say anything. Now I admit, at first I was a little mad that she didn’t tell me what she knew. But you, Dy, you were livid. And Lyn, as mad as you were at Payton, I knew you silenced her to secrecy. So, I couldn’t be mad at that. Dymond, you shouldn’t be angry that she didn’t tell you either.”
“You mean you didn’t tell … anybody?” Lynzi questioned in disbelief.
I looked her eye-to-eye and said, “No! I never betrayed you. I have been trying to tell you that all week, but you’ve been blowing me off.”
“Well then … who told?” Lynzi uttered, practically ashamed that she accused the wrong person.
Rain told us that yesterday she’d seen Bam in the hall. They overheard some busybodies talking about the whole thing. Bam told Rain he didn’t mean for this to blow up like it did. Then he slipped and said, as he banged on the lockers, that he should not have told Dakari.
Well, right when Rain breathed the word Dakari, I knew what had happened. Dakari told Fatz and Fatz told everyone else, especially Dymond. Dy in anger told Rain. Yep, that’s how it spread, as easily as butter on a toasted piece of bread.
Rain said, “So, Lynzi, it was never Payton that spilled the beans. It was Bam! The love you’re back together with actually let you down. Surprise, surprise!”
I couldn’t believe I didn’t think of Bam myself. Shoot, other than me, he was the only one who knew. Why in the world would he divulge his own business like that. And then Dakari … Guess I’m not the only one Dakari is letting down these days.
The next few minutes were full of apologies. Lynzi was kind enough to clear me with Dy. She explained everything. Lynzi told them that she had planned to tell them, but she was ashamed. They were cool with her reasoning. Finally, the four of us were laughing again. In their “I’m sorries,” they said it was their mission to get me a date for the cotillion.
Life was good again. Well, except Lynzi’s problem still existed. We ordered pizza, watched movies, and chatted away. Felt like it had been so long since we’d hung out.
The four of us cried. We laughed. We sang out of key to music videos. And we joked.
Then we finally broke into the unsafe place, Lynzi’s problem. None of us wanted to go there. However, we all knew we had to.
So, I asked the tough question. “Girl, have you gone to the doctor?”
“OK, don’t ya’ll get on me. I’m gonna go. I’ll go tomorrow. Yeah, tomorrow’s Saturday. I’ll go then. You know … why don’t all you guys come with me? Please, I need your support more than ever. Planned Parenthood is where we’ll go. I just … don’t know what I’m gonna do,” Lynzi cried as tears trickled down her face like it was a stream.
Each of us reaffirmed good things to her. We told her that we’d be there and that things would be OK. Her pain was ours.
The lights were off and in the darkness I thought, A slumber party has never meant so much to me before. I had to let them know.
I whispered with a slight crackle in my voice, “You guys awake? Listen … I care so much about each of you. This was one of the worst weeks of my life. Losing your friendships felt just as bad as losing big-head Dakari. Every time I kept thinking we would not be this tight again, the pain got worse. I count on you guys to be there. I love ya’ll!”
They said in unison, “We love you too!”
The next morning was pretty scary for all of us. Lynzi was on her way to confirm her pregnancy. We were all very quiet, kinda solemn, not knowing what the next step would be. However, we couldn’t get there till this was taken care of. The doctor had to at least tell her how far along she was, and make sure both she and the baby were OK.
Of course, Lynzi’s main reason for going was to find out all about abortion. Dymond seconded that. Rain and I tried over and over to tell her that wasn’t the way to go. We were split, yet unified.
When we got to the front of the place, we stared at the building twenty feet away. PLANNED PARENTHOOD! Those two words seemed ridiculous. First of all, nothing about this situation was planned. Lynzi definitely didn’t need to be a parent. If she did have a kid, she’d be struggling to stay out of the ’hood. ’Cause she won’t have a job.
“Well, no need to wait. Let’s go,” I informed.
Lynzi grunted, “I’m—I’m scared.”
“Lynzi.” Rain spoke to comfort her, “We’re here with you.”
“Girrrl, come on, you gotta do it sometime,” Dy announced. “The quicker you go in the faster you can get out!”
Lynzi stalled, “Can we just pray? I need some prayer. Pay, why don’t you lead?”
Agreeing with her idea, I voiced, “That’s fine. Let’s all pray.”
Since I drove and Rain was in the front passenger seat, we turned around. All four of us held hands. The grip was so tight.
“OK,” I began, “I’ll dial and Lynzi, then you go. Dy, you pray after her, and Rain, you hang up. Father, thank You so much for loving us. We realize that it is only Your grace which allowed us to get back together as friends. All of us are frightened right now. We need Your protection. Please give my friend peace as she talks to this doctor. Help her make the right decision. I’ve asked You for a miracle so many times before, but now I’m asking again.”
I ended and squeezed Lynzi’s hand, then she began, “God, I’m so … just … so … help me! I don’t want to let You down ever again. God, I can’t … can’t raise a baby. I need … ”
“Lord, I’m a lil’ shaken up too,” Dymond continued, because obviously as upset as Lynzi was, she could not go on. “I admit things are not really the way they’re suppose to be and stuff. I mean, You gotta help a sista out. Be on our side and all. Make things right, like only You can.”
Dy squeezed and Rain said, “Dearest Master, we praise You right now because You are so awesome. And although this situation looks bleak, I have faith, Lord, that You’re gonna do great things in the midst of turmoil. You are gonna blow our minds with Your next move. Yea though we walk through the darkness, we can keep treading, for we are walking with You. Amen!”
We had been sitting in the waiting room for sixteen minutes, anticipating the big moment that a nurse would escort Lynzi back to be examined. The place seemed so cold! So definite! So final!
I had no clue what each of them were thinking. My thoughts were riveting and frigid. I may not have been able to read their minds, but we were all as one, holding hands in as strong a grip as you’d ever get.
“Lynzi?” the tall blonde nurse called.
“That’s me … unfortunately,” Lynzi hesitantly stated.
Rain looked at me and asked, “Why didn’t they call her last name too?”
“I think here at Planned Parenthood,” I hoped to correctly explain, “it’s like an anonymous thang. Suppose to be a safe place for girls to go and receive correct information. I’m not one hundred percent sure though.”
The next thirty minutes were intense. All types of bad thoughts were swimming around in my brain. Among the three of us, we read every piece of literature in the place, from herpes to AIDS, from condoms to diaphragms, and from breast cancer to cancer of the cervix. If we ever needed a reason why God is against premarital sex, that day we found tons of reasons why we should abstain.
“I don’t know what Lynzi is gonna do with a child,” Rain expressed to Dy and me, almost breaking down.
We shook our heads to agree. Before we could say another word, we heard Lynzi screaming. We were even more scared now.
“I’M NOT PREGNANT! I’M NOT HAVING A KID! YES,” she yelled with tears of joy.
Of course, we had lots of questions. So, she explained. Basically, when her test at the doctor’s office came back negative, she was beside herself. Lynzi then told the nurse that three tests at home had come back positive. Therefore, they retested her, this time drawing blood. When that test came back negative too, she pulled one of her home test indicators from her purse.
The nurse laughed, after she examined it thoroughly. Can you believe it was an ovulation predictor kit, not a pregnancy test? With abnormal cycles, Lynzi was ovulating when she took the test. Not pregnant! Her period should be on any day. Lyn told us that she remembers quickly getting the box at the drug store ’cause she saw some of our classmates getting personal items.
All the way home we rejoiced. God is good! Everyone except Dymond vowed to leave sex alone. Dy said she’d try, but realistically, she’d just have to agree to be careful.
God proved once again that He knows what’s best. Luckily, we won’t have to face the tough choice. You better believe we will not forget this lesson. We thought that we were just passing the time, but the heavenly Father was testing our faith—and testing our friendship.