CHAPTER 6

A Short Chapter
(This Is A Short Chapter Because Malcolm Is Not Very Comfortable And We Don’t Want To Leave Him Being Uncomfortable For Too Long.)

Malcolm didn’t want Uncle Gobb to hear or see what he was doing so he was under his bed where he was uncomfortable.

The Genie arrived, as usual, through Malcolm’s nose.

‘Nice landing, big boy,’ he said to himself.

To Malcolm, he said, ‘I am the Genie of Malcolm’s Magic Nose, your wish is my wish … no, sorry, my command is … oh, I mean …’

Malcolm whispered, ‘Never mind all that. It’s great you’ve come. Listen –’

‘No, you listen,’ said the Genie.

‘No, you listen,’ said Malcolm. ‘I need you to help me to get to America.’

‘Sorry, pal, I don’t do flying carpets any more. They’re not allowed by air traffic control,’ said the Genie.

‘No, no, I mean I need you to think up some plan that will get me and Uncle Gobb to America, so that I can leave him there, and I can meet my dad again and sort it all out.’

‘Hmmm, I usually do heavyweight stuff; throwing tables, that sort of thing.’

‘You’re not very good, are you?’ said Malcolm.

‘I’ve got an excellent six pack,’ said the Genie.

It was all quiet under the bed for a bit, until the Genie said, ‘But if I were you, I would go and see Brenda.’

Malcolm thought about Brenda, Dad’s sister.

Why would she be able to help him get to America? He wasn’t even sure that Brenda much liked Malcolm’s dad.

(Don’t worry that you don’t know much about Brenda yet. You will.)

‘And I’ve been looking out for useful info for you,’ the Genie said.

‘Oh, thanks,’ said Malcolm still thinking about Brenda.

‘The stuff you need to know is this: Uncle Gobb’s Genie, Doctor Roop the Doop, has figured out that it’s the power of you and Crackersnacker working together that’s stopping Uncle Gobb from changing everyone’s minds so they think like him. So Doctor Roop the Doop is dying to tell Uncle Gobb that bit of info so that he can pull you two apart. But he can’t, until Uncle Gobb calls him up. See?’

Hmmm, Malcolm thought. So here’s me thinking how I’m going to get rid of Uncle Gobb, but if Doctor Roop the Doop gets to tell Uncle Gobb that Uncle Gobb has got to break up me and Crackersnacker, we’re in trouble. I’m going to have be very cunning. In America. When we find Dad … if we can get there …

‘Thanks, Genie of My Nose,’ he said, finally.

As Malcolm didn’t seem to need him for anything else, his Genie headed back to the Genies’ Green Room.