Thirty - Two

Ted flinched as Marjorie dug her nails into the back of his hand. He wanted to understand, to be sympathetic, but he felt nauseated by her stale, sweat-drenched smell, which occasionally made him want to heave.

A young Australian doctor leant forward between Marjorie’s legs and peered closely. ‘Meconium,’ he told the nurse. ‘The baby’s in distress.’

A rasping, strangled cry came from deep within Marjorie’s chest. ‘It’s OK,’ the doctor assured her, ‘your baby’s passing a black substance called meconium - which is not so surprising after struggling to get out into the world for the past thirteen hours. I think we ought to assist it.’

‘He means a caesarean section,’ the nurse explained, throwing the doctor a sidelong, irritated glance.

The young Australian grinned back at her. ‘Oh, so that’s what it’s called.’ He glanced at Ted, wondering why the husband seemed so detached, so unemotionally involved. ‘Right! You understand what’s involved, Mrs. Blackburn?’

Marjorie nodded, relieved now that the pain would soon end and she could sleep, and allow someone else the responsibility. Soon it would be out of her hands.

***

Nicky and Vanessa sat together on the sofa, watching a crime film with a convoluted plot which they both found difficult to follow. Vanessa yawned and glanced at her watch, wondering if she would sleep if she went to bed this early.

‘Have you ever done anything bad, something you regret, but can’t do anything to change?’ Nicky asked.

Vanessa thought about Jason. He’d been Nicky’s boyfriend until she stepped in.

‘Have you?’ Nicky persisted.

Vanessa nodded. ‘Yes, but I’m not in the mood for confessions. What about you?’

Nicky looked suddenly desperate, and her eyes filled with tears.

‘What’s wrong?’ asked Vanessa.

‘Oh God! What have I done? I only wanted to get at him. Not at Mum. But she’s the one who’ll suffer.’

Vanessa sat up excitedly and turned towards Nicky. She found it difficult to suppress the intrigued smile that was spreading across her face. ‘What have you done? Tell me.’

‘I did it without even thinking. I found his passport on the floor of the car. It must have dropped out of his jacket pocket when it was draped over the back seat. So I took it.’

Vanessa looked disappointed. ‘Oh, is that all? Well, they’re not leaving until mid morning tomorrow. You can phone him and tell him you found it here.’

Nicky’s voice began to tremble and tears ran down her cheeks. ‘No, I can’t. I cut it into bits with a pair of scissors.’

‘You did what?’

Nicky nodded slowly and looked into the distance through a veil of tears. ‘I can’t believe I did it. I was so angry. I cut it into tiny bits and chucked it in the bin.’

‘Shit!’ Vanessa said, and there was a degree of admiration in her exclamation. For the first time in ages she almost admired her sister. She herself would never have had the nerve to go that far.

***

Beaming happily, almost as if it was her baby, the auxiliary nurse told Ted he was the proud father of a perfectly healthy girl. ‘We’ll just clean her up and weigh her,’ she said, ‘then you can hold her.’

He watched while they wrapped and placed the tiny bundle on the scales. She seemed quiet. He had expected there would be much crying and bawling, like he’d seen in films.

‘Seven pounds, two ounces,’ the nurse told him. She brought over the bundle for him to hold. He took it carefully, accepting it as one might a precious gift. Then he looked down into his daughter’s vivid blue eyes. She seemed to know who he was. Had he imagined it? Was there a brief glimmer of recognition?

‘I’m seeing her before Marjorie, aren’t I?’ he said.

‘Yes,’ the nurse replied. ‘Your wife hasn’t come round yet. It’s a shame, but there we are.’

Ted smiled, a look of triumph in his eyes. He didn’t think it was a shame at all. He was pleased to be seeing his daughter before Marjorie. He gave her a wicked grin.

‘Who’s Daddy’s girl, then? he crooned softly.

His grin widened. He couldn’t wait to share his news with Donald. Soon he would be free to go round to Donald’s place, while Marjorie and his baby were in hospital. And he would be free to indulge himself with both Donald and Bamber. Suddenly he felt no remorse. No guilt. Life was becoming exciting and different.