[M]arriage is to make us “holy . . . without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish. . . .” ([Ephesians] verses 26–27). . . . Does this mean “marriage is not about being happy, it’s about being holy?” [No,] that is too stark a contrast. . . . [R]eal happiness is on the far side of holiness, not the near side. Holiness gives us new desires, and brings old desires into line with one another. So if we want to be happy in marriage, we will accept that marriage is designed to make us holy. (Hardcover, pp. 132–33; paperback, pp. 145–46)
THE CHIEF END. The Westminster Shorter Catechism asks, “What is the chief end [purpose] of man?” and answers, “To glorify God and enjoy Him forever.” Is it saying that if we glorify God by loving him and obeying him that it will result in great joy? Yes. But is it also saying that we only truly glorify God if we enjoy him? That too, because it is only if we are obeying him just for his sake, just for the greatness of our love of him, that we are truly obeying for his glory and not ours. Happiness and holiness have the same interdependent relationship in marriage. The more we grow spiritually, the more unselfish we can become, and the more we can find our happiness in the happiness and growth of our spouse.
Reflection: Have you seen holiness and happiness relate interdependently in your marriage?
Thought for prayer: Praise God for being so glorious and beautiful. Adore him until you feel something of his greatness. Then confess that you go to him too much for things instead of just more of God himself. Ask for a heart that seeks him like that.