Before the Lecture

Secretary		Forgive me if, just for a moment, I
		Give out our notices. Will members please
		Note that next Sunday in the Free Thought Hall
		The Peascod Players will do Everyman.
		The play lasts seven hours, but with a break
		For light refreshments when we can adjourn
		To the Club Cocoa Fountain. And I trust
		That everyman—and every woman, too!—
		Will see this quaint old-world morality.
		Next week our lecturer is Putney Heath,
		The celebrated publicist. He takes
		A rather startling subject for his talk—
		‘Some aspects of the modern Cultural Drive
		In Scandinavia’, Bring your Kierkegaards,
		Also your Kafkas. We in Edgbaston
		Are not behindhand in these matters. Please
		Send in your abstract art designs at once
		To the Community Centre. And this year
		The Art Committee asks me to point out
		That no surrealist work will be allowed.
		Last year, one lady member’s canvas was,
		To say the least, well—most unfortunate—
		She mayn’t have been aware of this herself;
		She worked, no doubt, with her subconscious mind-
		But there it was. So, if you please, this year
		Pure abstract only. Thank you very much.
Lecturer		Ladies and gentlemen, I come to you
		By kind permission of the D.I.A.,
		The British Council, Min. of Ag. and Fish.,
		The General Post Office, the L.M.S.,
		The T.U.C., Unesco,
		John Gloag and Vogue,
		And Working Parties in the Board of Trade,
		To tell you how to beautify your homes.