Chapter 37: Linda Booth

Ashford: Saturday, September 27th

‘I don’t see why we had to meet here.’ Martin scuffed at the gravel on the path, picked up a stone and skimmed it along the surface of the lake. His lower lip jutted out. ‘Or this early.’

‘It’s ten o’clock. And I’m getting a train down to Wales tomorrow, my uncle’s ill and there’s some family stuff that needs sorting.’ Linda waited to get his full attention, wishing she was anywhere but here and with anyone but him. She was going to hurt him and she was sorry about that, but better now than years down the line. Years in which she was sure they would both be miserable.

He ignored what she’d said. ‘I was nearly here before the park keeper.’ He pushed at one of the canoes with his foot, sending the whole row bobbing one by one.

Linda battled to keep her patience. She sat on the bench pulling her blue maxi-coat over her knees and clutched her shoulder-bag on her lap. Patting the seat of the bench, she said, ‘Come and sit down, Martin, there’s something I want to tell you.’

‘I’m all right here, thanks.’ He stood looking down on her, his arms folded.

She met his glare. ‘It’s not easy and I’m sorry—’

‘You want to pack me in, don’t you?’

‘I wouldn’t be being fair if I let things go on.’

‘How noble.’ His lips moved into a sneer. ‘How bloody noble of you.’

She understood his anger. ‘Martin—’

He didn’t give her a chance. ‘I knew it. I’ve known since the other day … since you stood me up at the last minute.’ He fumbled in the pocket of his sports jacket. When he held his hand out it was to show her a small box. ‘Know what this is?’ he demanded. ‘Cost me a bloody fortune, this ring did!’

Linda winced; it always came down to money with him. But still she said, ‘I’m sorry.’

He raised his eyes. ‘Stop bloody saying sorry. Just tell me why!’

She couldn’t, not really. ‘I don’t want to get married and that’s what you want.’

‘You could have told me that before I went chucking my cash around.’ He shoved the box back into his pocket, turned his head to one side and spat. The globule just missed her foot. When he looked back at her there was a challenge in his eyes.

Like a spoiled little boy, Linda thought, even as she understood his anger. Had she led him on? She wasn’t sure but then admitted she’d let him think they would eventually get married. Why? She’d known for a long time it wasn’t what she wanted. And it wasn’t just that she needed a career. No, if she were truthful … even if it was only to herself … she’d been bored with him for a long time. With his penny-pinching ways, his counting the cost of every time they went to the pictures, went on a bus, a train, shopping together. Last month he’d even chastised her for spending her own money on a new pair of shoes, she remembered.

The sudden spark of irritation pushed the guilt to one side. ‘I didn’t ask you to. You just took it for granted we’d get married.’

‘Round about the same time you let me in your knickers.’ He sneered. ‘Or do you do that for all the lads? From prick-tease to slut in one easy week.’

That’s it; enough is enough, Linda thought, standing up. She pulled the strap of her bag onto her shoulder, watching a girl approach, carrying a transistor blasting out the Rolling Stones’ ‘Honky Tonk Women’. Linda waited until she was sure Martin would hear her next words. ‘I think we’ve said everything that needs to be said.’

Martin picked up some stones and turned to skim one across the lake without speaking. She watched. The water mirrored the sky: gloomy clouds skating across the surface, now rippled by the bouncing stone until it sunk.

He chucked in the last of the stones with a flick of his wrist. One rattled into the first canoe. ‘Don’t bother getting in touch again. Cow.’ He walked away from her before spinning on his heel and almost tripping over a dog. The owner mumbled something at him; Linda couldn’t hear what it was but she heard Martin’s reply. ‘Sod off.’

Then he pointed at her. ‘Oh, and by the way, I’ll have that bracelet back I bought you for your birthday. I should be able to sell it. Get my money back – salvage something from the fiasco I thought was a relationship.’

Linda didn’t answer. He’d get the bracelet back; she’d make sure of that. She blinked hard against the burn in her eyes. What did she expect?

She watched him walk past two girls, walking arm in arm and giggling, looking at him surreptitiously. He cocked his head at them, gave a wolf-whistle. ‘Okay, girls?’ she heard him shout, walking backwards and whistling again.

Linda looked back at the lake. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction of knowing she’d seen.

The lake was black; there was no reflection of the sky any more. The first heavy drops of rain splattered on the path.