Tristram Hamilton Boye! Come in here this minute!”
Laine’s eyes flew open.
“Where is your brother?” shrieked the elder Mrs. Boye. She was in the kitchen, and slammed down a saucepan lid like a cymbal. “Your father will be home shortly and the carport has not been swept!”
Laine rolled slowly out of bed. The queen-size was one of the few new things in the house—a concession to physical comfort she’d been intractable about when the prospect of moving in with Gavin’s mother moved from possible to probable some six months after Mr. Boye succumbed to cancer. But now, even the new bed felt tainted. It was an inner-sprung monument to lies, a petri dish of mendacity she had shared with her faithless husband, and shared now with creeping dreams that flew from light but left harsh scratches and diseased, black feathers. Laine promised herself that, as soon as she could, she would rid herself of this house, this bed, her clothes, her jewelry—everything but the flesh she lived in. She would scrub herself clean and flee to start a new life whose first and only commandment would be: Never let thyself be lied to again.
She sat on the edge of the bed, wondering how much of yesterday—strange yesterday—she had dreamed. The almost ridiculously neat young minister Pritam Anand. The haunted, angry, oddly attractive Nicholas Close. The dead bird. The photographs. A shadowed haberdashery where an ageless woman once kept shop and watched and spun plans.
And where now a pretty young woman sold health food, she reminded herself.
My dead husband was one of her customers.
That was exactly the kind of coincidence she’d poured scorn on last night. She pulled back her hair and went to face the crazed force that was her mother-in-law.
Laine tended to Mrs. Boye, gently steering her away from unfocused rage to eat, to bathe, to sit while she picked up the telephone and sifted through the bones of a diminishing list of potential live-in caregivers. Two encouraging interviews were set for the afternoon, and Laine felt satisfied enough to shower, dress, and step into the misty drizzle and walk toward Myrtle Street. It was stupid, it was childish, but she needed to see for herself this young woman from whom Gavin—Gavin, of all people, for fuck’s sake—had started buying health food.
The fine rain was cold and held the world closely in a gauzy veil. She tried to avoid the puddles on the footpaths, but her shoes soon squelched and her feet turned icy. A pair of crows huddled on the branches of a tall gum let out a half-hearted protest at her passing. The birds brought back the memory of the miserable dead thing Nicholas Close had placed on the young reverend’s coffee table, its limp wings flopping around that bizarre fist of a head.
Laine had been very proud of herself last night. Nicholas Close had talked about ghosts and magic, and woven a bit of a spell himself. He’d sounded so convincing, so logical, so sad, that she’d found herself wanting to believe him. But testing prods at his argument had made him angry, and long years with Gavin had taught her that angry, defensive people shared the lousy habit of being wrong.
Ahead, she heard water dripping a monotonous tattoo in some downpipe and the jut-jaw awning of the shop appeared out of the misty drizzle. Closer, she could see the wire frames outside holding the banners for women’s magazines and newspapers. One headline read: Health Minister Under Fire. This was the real world. What room was there for magic when Palestinian rockets and Israeli smart bombs could snuff a hundred lives in a moment? An overflowing trash can, a nearby car with a flat tire, dog shit on the nature strip, a ludicrously yellow chip packet that seemed to leap out in the watery gloom. Even the shop front was frank and wonted: Plow & Vine Health Foods written in a hokey rustic font and flanking a logo of a rustic hand plow and a rustic trellis that combined to give an effect that was, let’s face it, hamfisted and artless. A less magical façade was hard to imagine.
For two long minutes, Laine stood in the drizzle and debated turning around and sloshing home. But the prospect of returning to the twilit house where Mrs. Boye shouted at ghosts was a strong disincentive. So, she stepped under the awning to the door of the health food store and went inside.
The shop was pleasantly warm, and smelled delicious. Warm pools of light fell on jars of bush honey, open sacks of coffee beans, tantalizingly spiced joss sticks, wooden boxes of fragrant tea leaves. Every step brought an appetizing new aroma, a tempting and sapid morsel.
“Are you looking for something in particular?”
She turned to the voice.
Two downlights over the counter flicked on. A slender young woman stepped out from the back room and flipped a switch on the side of the electric till; it beeped and its zeroes lit green.
So this is her, thought Laine.
The young woman was pretty, but naturally so. She carried herself more like a country girl, pleased with her looks, but they didn’t factor on her top ten issues of the day.
“Just getting out of the rain, really,” answered Laine.
The woman nodded and smiled warmly. “You’re welcome to browse as long as you like.”
“Thanks,” said Laine. From the corner of her eye she saw the other woman open the till and stock its drawer with notes from a cash bag.
Laine drifted along the shelves, sniffing the lotions, rolling small hessian sacks of beans in her hands, plucking a leaf of rosemary from a sheaf and lifting it to her nose and savoring its autumnal spice. Then she saw the pumpkin seeds.
“They’re pretty popular. Have you tried them?” said the woman, shutting the till.
Laine shook her head. “Just opening?”
“Yeah, late start. I had to …” The woman wiped her hands on her jeans and wrinkled her nose. “Mammogram.” She smiled and shrugged—what can you do?
Laine nodded. “All okay?”
“Yes, thank God. It’s a stress. My mother, she had a double full mastectomy. I don’t know how she coped. I guess you just do.”
“Yes.”
“I don’t know how I would …” She trailed off, then laughed. “I kind of like mine!”
Laine found herself smiling. “I hear you.”
This girl is no husband-stealer. And as for the old seamstress who Nicholas said had nested here, this place was so inviting, so pleasant, it was impossible to imagine.
The woman opened a box of tea tree shampoos and began marking the bottles. “I mean, it’s not like I’m going to have kids, but you never—”
She bit off her last words. Laine watched. Embarrassment bloomed in the other woman’s pale cheeks.
“Pardon?” asked Laine. She could see the girl’s jaw was tight.
“Nothing.”
Christ, she had some other kind of sickness? Cervical cancer? That would be so cruel, a girl this attractive and young unable to have kids. She touched her shoulder.
“Are you okay? Jesus, I’m sorry. It’s none of my business. But is it serious?”
She gently took Laine’s wrist and lifted her hand off her shoulder. Laine found her skin on the underside of her wrist tingling. How long has it been since anyone touched me there? The girl kept her eyes on the floor. “It’s a preference thing.”
Laine’s eyes widened just a little as she understood. “Oh.”
The girl nodded and smiled.
Laine kicked herself. Gavin might have tried to crack on to this woman, but it certainly didn’t happen the other way round.
“I didn’t … I wasn’t trying to pry,” she said.
“That’s okay.”
“Does your … your partner must have been relieved your tests were clear.”
The girl put her hands in her pockets. Her blush deepened, then she frowned and laughed. “I’m … I’m not … I’m single right now.”
Laine held up her hand—I understand. “The joys of being out there, huh?”
“Yeah.” She laughed and rolled her eyes in mock despair.
Laine smiled. The girl’s eyes were dark brown, the beautiful color of polished rosewood. “But, hey,” said Laine, “this must work as a way to meet people.” She waved at the shop surrounds.
“You’d be surprised how bad, actually.” She laughed again. “I mean, if I was into threesomes with very hairy vegan couples, this would be paradise. But I like … I prefer, you know, more sophisticated women.”
She held her gaze on Laine. Her expression was frank. Women like you, it said. But the moment Laine thought she read that, the other woman looked away and got back to her work.
Laine found her heart thudding harder. She’d never had a woman try to pick her up. Was she trying to pick me up? Is she just being nice? How do I say no?
Do I say no?
Laine blinked, shocked at her own thoughts, and knocked a packet of caraway seeds onto the floor.
“Sorry!” she said, and stooped to pick it up.
“Don’t be silly.” The girl knelt, too. As they stooped, their foreheads tunked together.
“Ow!”
“Oh!”
The girl threw back her head and laughed. Laine smiled wider, rubbing her head. She’s attractive. She has beautiful skin. Beautiful lips. How long since you were kissed? How long since anyone traced their fingers over your belly? Looked at you like you were beautiful? Laine inhaled through her nostrils. The girl’s hair smelled like sandalwood. Exotic. Different. Clean and exciting. And her eyes. Dark brown and deep …
“What’s your name?” the girl asked, watching her.
“Laine.”
“Laine.” She said the name slowly, her tongue flicking behind her white teeth, as if tasting it.
Laine felt a small shudder below her navel. “And yours?” Laine asked.
“Rowena.” She stared at Laine’s face, her skin, her eyes. Appraising. Approving. “Here.” She reached up and gently swept aside the stray hairs over Laine’s eyes, pushed them back, and swooped them behind Laine’s ear. Laine sucked in a breath at the touch of another’s fingertips on her temple, her ear, her neck. Laine half-turned her head. I shouldn’t like this. Not from a girl.
“How’s that bump?” Rowena whispered.
She softly took Laine’s face in both hands. Her palms were dry and cool. She tilted Laine’s face to her own. Her mouth opened slightly and she leaned forward.
“Looks just fine,” she whispered softly, and dropped her eyes to look right into Laine’s.
Those eyes, thought Laine. Beautiful eyes.
Rowena smiled. Lips apart. White teeth. Red lips.
“Good,” whispered Laine. She leaned forward.
The ringing of her mobile phone was as shrill and sudden as a steam whistle. Laine rocked back in surprise. Rowena’s fingers slid on her skin, and one nail caught on her jaw, slicing into the flesh, drawing blood.
“Oh, God!” cried Rowena. “I’m so sorry.”
Laine jerked back. She felt the burning of the deep scratch on her jaw.
The phone trilled again, insistent. She fumbled into her bag.
“It’s fine. Fine.”
“You’re bleeding.”
Laine blinked, and raised her fingers to her cheek. They came away lightly dotted with red. Rowena stood and hurried to reach under the counter.
“I’m fine, it’s nothing.”
Was I going to kiss her? What was I thinking?
Rowena returned with a tissue. “Here …”
She gently reached for Laine’s cheek. Laine fought the urge to shrink back from her. Rowena pressed the tissue onto Laine’s skin. The scratch pulsed in new pain.
I’m sorry, she mouthed.
Laine forced a smile—forget it—and finally grabbed her phone and hit the green button. “Hello?”
“Mrs. Laine Boye?”
“Ms. Boye, yes.”
“Ms. Boye. Okay. This is Detective Sergeant Anne Waller from Police Headquarters. I need to ask you a couple of questions. Is now a good time?”
Rowena frowned as she pulled away the tissue. A flecked line of blood on the white gauze.
“One second.” Laine covered the phone with her hand. “I’m sorry, I have to go outside and …”
Rowena nodded. “Sure. But come back in and I’ll put some pawpaw ointment on that. I’m so sorry.”
Laine stepped outside. The door shut behind her. Rain tattled on the awning overhead.
“Sorry. Go ahead.”
“Ms. Boye, can I ask you about your movements last night?”
“What’s going on?”
“If you could please tell me what you did last night, and the times.”
Laine’s heart started thudding again. She turned around.
In the back of the store, Rowena was frowning, hands busily tidying.
“Ms. Boye?”
“I went to the Anglican—what do you call it? Parsonage?—here in Tallong about eight or so and was there with Reverend Anand till, I guess, ten?”
The detective asked a few questions to confirm the times, to confirm she drove straight there and back, to confirm what make of car she owned.
“And I have a Nicholas Close here,” said Detective Waller. “He wants to talk to you.”
Laine looked into the shop. Rowena was out of sight.
“Sure.”
She took the opportunity to slip away into the rain.
Nicholas leaned against the cold black granite of the Police Headquarters building, wanting desperately to sit.
Rain was hitting Roma Street so heavily that he wouldn’t have been surprised to see the bitumen pit and dissolve. Only by pressing himself against the building could he get any cover from the high, clipped-wing awnings. The metal bench seats out front were all exposed to the rain and rang dully as the heavy drops struck them. Nicholas shut his eyes, figuring anyone passing would take him for a swaying vagrant too pitiful to charge.
For the last half-hour, he’d been trying not to watch a middle-aged man on the footpath in front of him reel under a barrage of invisible punches, fall to the ground, heave and jerk as he was struck by unseen kicks to his kidneys, his groin, his head. The man’s face was white and wide with terror and, under the steady bombardment of ethereal steel-tipped toes, caved in and bloodied. His eyes came out. His jaw snapped. His fingers bent and their bones broke through skin. Gradually, he stopped his voiceless wailing, spasmed briefly, and was still. Then there was a silent edit in the spool of his death and he was suddenly swaying whole and seemingly drunk beside the steel bench in front of Nicholas, his ghostly clothes dry despite the downpour … and the grisly replay of his murder began again.
Nicholas was too exhausted to lift his feet and find another spot to wait. It was now well after eleven. His hour and a half in the police building had been almost solid questioning, punctuated with short breaks when the detectives left him alone. He supposed the pauses were designed to allow him to panic and consider confessing. Instead, they gave him time to divine from the questions what might have happened to Hannah Gerlic’s sister, Miriam.
Detective Waller and that slim male detective had tag-teamed the interview. Each asked slow, deliberate sets of questions: some were repeated over and over; some were rephrased or amalgamated with others; some came out of the blue to catch him off guard. Nicholas’s favorite had been: “Why did Miriam take your cigarettes?” He’d chewed over the cleverness of that while he leaned against the ice-cold wall, recalling how carefully Waller had watched his response. “I never saw her,” he’d replied truthfully. He supposed Waller had been hoping for “I don’t smoke” or better yet, “I don’t know, but the little bitch has still got ’em.”
“When you picked up Hannah Gerlic, was she alone?” Waller had asked.
“Yes.”
Nicholas guessed that this was unusual and Hannah habitually walked home with Miriam.
“What were the two girls arguing about?” asked Waller.
“Hannah never spoke to me.”
The girls were having a fight. That explained their separation.
“Was Miriam still in her school uniform when you dropped Hannah home?”
“I never saw Miriam.”
Miriam had made it home after school, but she’d gone missing afterward—sometime in the night.
“You say you were at the presbytery with Reverend Anand and Laine Boye. Till when?”
“I don’t know. Ten or so.”
“Did you drive straight home?”
“Yes.”
“Did you stop at any shops? Gas station? Parks?”
“No.”
He was left alone in the room then for a quarter of an hour, before Waller came in again. Her voice was even, but her frown was heavy as lead.
“You’re free to go, sir. There’s a taxi stand at the Transit Center across the road.”
Without realizing why, he’d asked her to phone Laine Boye.
And so now he was hugging the police building’s front wall, trying to stay dry. He lifted his fingers to his neck. The wooden beads felt warm. His back against the stone felt frozen.
Eventually, to his surprise, Laine arrived.
The car’s tires hissed on the road. Nicholas slumped in the passenger seat. They drove in silence for a long while. He looked at Laine. Her eyes were as gray as the sky.
“How do you feel?” he asked.
Laine glanced at him. Was that a flash of self-consciousness?
“What do you mean?” she replied.
“I mean, how do you feel?”
The rainy-day traffic was stop-start and the cars inched ahead like cattle toward a crush. She didn’t answer, so he spoke again.
“There are nights I still dream that Cate is lying beside me. And then I wake up. And at that moment when I … remember, I feel like I feel now. Heavy.” He watched the rainy world sliding idly by. “Like if you laid me on the ground I’d just sink into the earth.”
“I used to feel like that,” she said. “Then Gavin killed himself.”
He looked back at her. Her profile was strong and fine. Hers was a face out of antiquity, anachronistic. She should have been born in a city of Renaissance sculptors, or the daughter of some Pharaoh, not today when culture was a thousand hits on YouTube. No wonder she was always angry.
As if feeling his gaze, she turned suddenly to face him. “Did you love her?” she asked. “Cate?”
Nicholas nodded. “Very much.”
Laine lifted her chin. “You said last night that you can see …” She hesitated. “That you see ghosts. Did you ever see her? Cate? After she died?”
Nicholas was quiet. For some reason, this seemed deeply personal, like a new lover’s questions about past partners. He didn’t want to answer. But his tongue betrayed him. “Yes.”
Laine drew a long breath through her nostrils. “You must be so sad.”
He thought about that. “I’m not sad. I’m angry.”
Laine smiled. “I was angry. Now I’m sad.” She flicked on the turn signal. “Aren’t we a pair?”
The car turned onto Coronation Drive, and their speed picked up.
“Where am I taking you?” she asked.
Before he could think why, he answered, “The church.”
She nodded, checked her mirrors, and changed lanes. As she turned, Nicholas saw a small cut on her cheek.
“What happened to your face?” he asked, and guessed: “Mrs. Boye?”
“Yes.”
Her tone said the talking, for now, was over.
Outside the church, a group of middle-aged and elderly men and women huddled under umbrellas, hardly moving, heads turning this way and that. To Nicholas they looked like a team of mallard ducks—dignified and vulnerable. Their heads all followed Laine’s car as it slowed and stopped. He would have been unsurprised if they’d sprouted wings and fled, honking forlornly. He wound down his window. “Hi. The rectory’s around the side.”
An old man with a long face and wide, hairy nostrils looked down at him. “We do know.”
Nicholas shook his head. Then why … ?
“The reverend is dead, and his replacement is in hospital.”
“Who?” asked Nicholas. “Pritam? Reverend Anand’s in hospital?”
An old woman with sagging wattles looked at him as if he were a fool. “Do you know any other replacement? We’re discussing what to do.”
Nicholas looked at Laine.
At that moment, Laine’s lips lifted in a sudden, pained snarl and her head threw back hard against the headrest. For a moment, her long fingers snatched at the air and then at the fresh wound on her face …
“Laine!”
Her gray eyes rolled back in her head and she sank limp into her seat.