Ford had taken a gamble on asking about her father. The curiosity was getting to him, and being in her presence seemed to erase most of his better sense. If she'd physically constructed a wall around herself, it wouldn't have been any more obvious that she was not willing to discuss her family anymore. He regretted every word of his question.
There was still so much he wanted to know. Harold and Delphia Simpkin had owned that little farm out on County Road 2982 for at least fifty years, and Abe was not their kid. He'd lived there for all of Ford’s life as far as he knew. The Simpkins mostly kept to themselves. Ford didn't remember them having a daughter, of course he'd only known the parents of the kids he'd hung out with. He planned to ask his own daddy what he knew about it.
Another wallop of regret centered in his chest when he realized that even if he hadn't always been knee-deep in haying and working cattle every summer, he still wouldn't ever have met Callie. He was too busy banging every girl who looked his way to ever really have paid attention to any of them. Until Meritt had pulled her stunt, his wild side had run several country miles wide. After that, he'd remained faithful. He'd always thought that was how it was supposed to work.
"I really do need to go," Callie's urgency yanked him back from his regretful wonderings. "Nana worries about everything. Even if someone told her I was with a friend, I bet she didn't sleep at all. I feel terrible I did this."
Family obligation was certainly something Ford understood. Plus, he was probably miserable company. "Sure, just let me grab my keys. Don't be too hard on yourself. Everybody deserves a break now and again." He scooped up the stack of paperwork she'd had with her at the bar the night before and handed them her way without comment. He hadn't looked at them, but he recognized the Monroeville Savings and Loan letterhead sticking out of the folders. Was she having financial trouble? Clinging to some need to salvage whatever this was, he kept his mouth shut and grabbed his hat and keys.
She was quiet most of the drive off of Holder Ranch, but just before he turned on the road that would lead them to town, she offered him a sweet smile. "Thanks for taking care of me last night. Your ranch is beautiful. I used to hear people talk about your family and all of your land, but I never really thought I'd ever be out here."
Ford sighed at that. "Don't believe everything you hear, and you're welcome on the ranch anytime."
"I might take you up on those sunrise pictures."
The idea that he'd get to see her again awoke something deep inside of him, something he didn't recognize, something he wasn't certain he was supposed to feel. It yawned and stretched itself back to life. "Uh..." he'd made some utterance of noise before he fully realized what he was doing. What was appropriate at the end of...whatever this had been?
"What?" She stared at him again with those deep brown eyes that he swore felt like they could see through him.
"Nothing."
"What were you going to say?" Her question held no disdain, just curiosity, but since he had no idea how to ask a woman out on a date or even how to ask for her phone number, he chickened out. Besides, why would a woman like her want to have anything to do with him? He was a washed-up divorcé with more land than good sense.
"Just that I hope you enjoy being here for however long you're here."
She grinned at that. "I applied for a photography internship with Nina Morales in New York, which was stupid of me, but I did it. Have you ever heard of her? She's amazing."
He shook his head. "I don't know much about photography, but why is that stupid?"
Her gaze shifted to the endless prairie as it extended its arms before them. "It doesn't even pay anything. I can't afford it. I've just always admired her work so much. She's so..."
"What?" he urged. She gave him a quick shrug and sank her teeth into her bottom lip in some kind of effort to keep the answer from him. Suddenly, all that mattered to him was unearthing this clue to her that she was trying to keep concealed. "Hey, come on. We're friends, right?" He added lame to his lengthy list of things he currently didn't much like about himself.
"Fine," she chuckled, "Nina is so unapologetic, you know? Most of the time I feel like all I do is apologize for everything and do whatever other people want me to do."
He considered that for two beats but went on with the confession locked behind his lips. "I spent a lot of years apologizing for shit that wasn't my fault, so I get that."
"What were you apologizing for?" She sounded offended on his behalf.
He studied her for a few minutes as he made the right on the Main Street square. "If I asked you that, would you tell me?"
"Sorry, I shouldn't have asked that. I'm so bad about doing that." Her beautiful pink lips twisted in consideration, and he caught himself staring at her mouth for too long. Blinking away the foreign desire that played in the periphery of his mind, he pulled into the lot of Rusty’s. Finally, she shook her head. "But no, I wouldn’t. At least not today."
"Then maybe we can delve into all of that the next time I let you sleep in my bed." He chuckled at his own joke, but a decent portion of him wished he wasn't teasing her. Some strange breath of warmth filled him. Was he flirting with her? God, it had been so long he'd forgotten how or what it felt like when he managed to do it.
Her quiet laughter sent a flood of heat throughout his body. He gripped the steering wheel tighter, trying desperately to get a grip on whatever this girl was doing to him.
"I'm really going to try to never, ever drink so much that I need some stranger to take me home with him ever again. I'm really sorry you had to sleep on your couch, but I appreciate you not taking advantage."
Still lacking any semblance of self-control, he shrugged. "Hey, you don't have to apologize to me about anything." He didn't want to be one of the people in her life that made her feel like everything was her fault.
Surprise lit in those eyes of hers. "Thank you."
"Trust me, it wasn't the first time I've slept on that couch."
He'd never admitted that out loud to anyone. Bracing for the pity he was sure would knot in his throat choking him, she surprised him with a thoughtful smile instead. "I slept on the futon for a while before I left to come out here. I decided that it's better to sleep alone than with someone who'd rather be sleeping with someone else."
Shock reverberated through Ford's worn muscles. "He cheated on you?" His question was perforated with fury. The icy shards of anger fractured some of the numbness he'd existed in for months. He had no idea what kind of idiot would cheat on a girl like Callie, but if he ever met the guy he'd beat his opinion of that into his face.
"Depends on who you ask. Thanks again, for everything."
"She'd been cheating on me for years," spilled from his lips. He wished he could suck the words back into his mouth. Why did he tell her that? God, wasn't it bad enough that the entire county knew what a joke his life was? Why did he have to warn her as well?
But again she didn't flinch or offer him pity, which he loathed. Her face didn't do that thing everyone else’s did, where their mouths were speaking apologies while their eyes were strained with thankfulness that it wasn't them. Or worse, the guilt that broadcast from the people who'd known all along and allowed him to go on believing her endless lies.
"It just sucks, doesn't it?" She sighed. "You've been there all this time trying to do the right things and make it work, and you're not even worth the truth."
"Yeah...that's it exactly."
"Whoever she was, I feel sorry for her for not seeing what she had when she had it. I'll see you around." With that, she opened his truck door and slid to the ground. That skirt she was wearing scooted up her long, shapely legs. A hungry grunt lodged in Ford's throat half-terrifying him, half-intriguing him. He tried to cough it away when she spun back to wave at him, making the lengthy skirt fly outwards from her body, like the wings of a butterfly taking flight. "Thanks again."
"Anytime."