The next day, after the morning meeting, the office was abuzz with excitement. Brittany was her usual self, directing people where to go to set up for lunch. John was getting comfortable in his new office, the conference room was transformed with fine linen and china, and flowers were placed for modest decoration on the table. Mrs. Pinckney was overwhelmed with joy when she saw the changes in John after his promotion. I had invited several important people from the community to share in the joy, including the judge (my uncle), the mayor, some council members. They all knew of the power of my office and respected me greatly. Now that my father was gone and I had John as my right hand, things were looking up, and those who came for lunch knew who was in the lead, God first, then me and John.
As soon as all were in the conference room and seated, I stood up. “Can I have everyone’s attention, please? Mr. Mayor, council members, Rabbi, Tio, Ms. Pinckney, and my darling Luisa. Thank you all for joining us today. It is with great honor in the memory of my father that I present to you our new partner, John Pinckney, Esquire!”
The room was filled with applause. “John, the floor is yours.” I stepped out of the way to let John address the room after giving him a handshake and a brotherly hug.
“Jose, thank you.” John returned my hug before turning to speak to the room. “I am humbled and honored with this gift from Don Jose and his son Jose. They believed in me before I believed in myself. They have helped me more than words can say. Mother, thank you for your constant encouragement. And most importantly, God, thank you for not giving up on me. Thank you all for coming!”
Again the room was filled with applause as I stood up again. “Rabbi, could you bless the food please?”
“Adonai, we ask for you to bestow your blessing on John, his mother, and this practice. Help them to keep you first always. And we thank you for the meal that we are about to have. Amen.”
Several more “amens” were heard throughout the group.
“Eat up, everyone!” I said.
John turned to me. “Jose, thank you from the bottom of my heart.”
“John, you are now and have always been a Ladino deep down in your soul. Now, enjoy today.” We all had a wonderful meal and conversation that lasted most of the afternoon.
The next day I called Bernice. Luisa couldn’t bear the thought of having to tell her best friend about the news. Bernice answered after a few rings. “Bernice, hello.”
“Well, hello, Jose. You are speaking so nicely now.”
“It is well with my soul. How is Emilio?”
“He is much better, thank God!” I could hear a soft sigh escape her as she thought of how far he had come.
I took in a deep breath and swallowed hard. The news that I was about to share was not going to be easy. “Luisa asked for me to call you.”
I heard Bernice inhale sharply. She knew something was up when Luisa herself didn’t call. “What…what is going on?”
“It’s not good news.”
She started to choke up before I could get any further. “Jose, please don’t tell me that.”
I paused, but I knew that I had to continue now. “It’s stage four breast cancer. There is metastasis in several areas.” Now she was crying—no, wailing was more the sound. “Bernice…” I didn’t think she could hear me for the emotions that were being let out of her. Her wailing was almost to the point of yelling now, but I understood. She and Luisa were as tight as two friends could be; they were practically joined at the hip at times.
I gave her time to grieve and express her emotions. After several minutes, she was finally able to speak again. “When did you find out?”
“Last week, at Iglesias’s office.”
Bernice took in a tattered breath. “Is she okay?”
“She is handling it better than I am. Iglesias is going to help her find some other therapies rather than chemotherapy and radiation. We are looking into therapies from Israel and China. And Dr. Zhang is going to be starting her on an anti-tumor herbal therapy.”
“Thank God for that! I didn’t think that she would want radiation or chemotherapy.”
“Yes, but we wanted also to tell you to continue to go forward with the adoption.”
I could hear a sigh of relief with her response. “Of course, I don’t think that the judge would rule against you having custody!”
“Oh, good. Thank you.” I felt as if a heavy weight had been lifted off me when she said that. “I know that you will get together soon with Luisa. She just didn’t want to bother you since you are dealing with Emilio.”
“Oh, my goodness! That sounds just like her, putting others first. She never has put herself before others.”
“Yes, it is like her. And thank you so much, Bernice.”
“Call you if you need anything! We are here for you both.”
“Yes, we will, of course.” We said good-bye and I went into my sanctuary, the kitchen. I felt closer to God in there. Why? I couldn’t answer that. But when I spoke to him while in the kitchen, I felt His presence more.
I began to pray. “God, I have fasted, I have prayed, I have cried out to you. I have yet to find relief in myself. I can only find relief with you and your presence in me. The adversary has haunted me with visions of Luisa’s death. Who will deliver me from this anguish? I call upon you now, Adonai 
. God of the universe, this battle is yours and your angels’, just like when you delivered Goliath into King David’s hand.
“Have I missed something, Lord? I’m sleep deprived, anguished, but the little faith that I still can muster toward you comes from you alone. My soul is dry like the desert, looking for water from a spring to quench my thirst. My soul is thirsty for your relief of this torment. Thank you, God, for I know that you are listening.”
I heard footsteps down the hall. “Jose?”
“Yes, Luisa, in the kitchen.”
“What are you up to?” She looked at me like she caught me with my hand in the cookie jar.
“Just having a quiet moment with God.”
As she walked into the kitchen, we locked eyes.
“Amor, my love, remember that this battle is God’s, not ours alone.”
I tried to speak. “Luisa, I was just—”
She placed a finger to my lips. “I already know. God told me what you were going through.”
“Why does that not surprise me?” God seemed to do that when He knew that I needed affirmation that He heard me.
“Jose, when I’m with you, I’m one with you because of God in us. Don’t leave me and go into a dark place. This diagnosis is just that, a diagnosis. I need you next to me, here, inside of my heart and soul.” She lightly grabbed my hand and placed it over her heart. “When you hurt, I hurt. When you worry, I worry with you. I need God’s oneness with you, so that what I am going through will be easier knowing that you and God are both there. Comprendes (Understand)?”
“Si. Yes, my love.”
“Now, can we please go sit on the porch? I need to hold your hand and enjoy this nice evening.”
We went out to the porch, but it was easier said than done. Luisa always knew how to calm me down; she just let God speak through her. All I could think was, “God, thank you for bringing me this woman, who truly understands me, into my life.” My thoughts were interrupted with Luisa speaking.
“Amor?”
“Yes, Luisa?”
“It’s going to be okay.” She squeezed my hand tighter.
“Yes, Luisa.”
She gave a disgruntled sigh. “You are such a mood killer, Jose.”
“Am I really?”
“Silly man, just don’t let go of my hand.”
I gave her hand a light kiss. “Okay, my love.”
My heart beat as fast as the thoughts ran through my head. I didn’t know how many more times we would have just sitting on the porch, holding hands. Again, Luisa broke my train of thought. It’s as if she was inside my head tonight.
“Amor, quit thinking about death or when it will happen. I’m here, right now. I’m not going anywhere. This cancer has no authority over this body because it belongs to God.”
“Wow, Mujer. You should have—no, better yet, I believe that you were a female Tzadik, a righteous person.”
She giggled at that. “No, I’m just Luisa.”
“I love the way that you say that. ‘I’m just Luisa’ in that Southern twang that you have.”
“You have always loved my accent. I think it gets your fancy.”
My eyebrows raised as I looked at her. “Fancy, hmmm. Mujer!”
She started laughing now. I loved that sound. I could feel her soul. It’s a laugh full of joy even though… I stopped that train of thought before I went down that dark, gloomy path again.
The rest of the night was quiet but full of love between us.