SAONY CASTILLO
YEARS AS MENTEE: 2
GRADE: Junior
HIGH SCHOOL: Art and Design High School
BORN: Dominican Republic
LIVES: New York, NY
MENTEE’S ANECDOTE: When I first met Lauren, we bonded over how tired we were and how neither of us are morning people. I was really nervous to have a new mentor this year because I didn’t know what to expect. Lauren is really cool, though, and I’m glad it was her. My favorite moments with Lauren are when we’re drinking coffee together and laughing about the most random stuff, like how sometimes it’s hard to function when you’re so sleep-deprived. That hinders my ability to speak English sometimes, which she finds amusing.
LAUREN KIEL
YEARS AS MENTOR: 1
OCCUPATION: Editorial Strategy Director, Bloomberg
BORN: Wilmington, NC
LIVES: New York, NY
MENTOR’S ANECDOTE: As a new mentor, I had no idea what to expect when I met my mentee. But Saony and I connected immediately. Our first activity together was to write the opening line of our autobiographies, and we wrote almost the exact same sentence (about our dislike of mornings and love for coffee). Over the numerous cups of coffee we’ve had since, I’ve been consistently inspired by her insights and creativity.
I was going to write something creepy for the anthology, but I decided to take a lighter approach. I’m pretty pleased with how it turned out. If just one person reads this and finds enjoyment or relates to it in any way, that’s enough. I hope that person enjoys it.
INT. COFFEE SHOP, NEW YORK CITY—AFTERNOON
Barb: “Ugh, I’m so tired of these stupid city guys … they’re just jerks.”
Jess: “What do you mean?”
Barb: “They never call you back.”
Jess: “People don’t make phone calls in general.”
Barb: “You also catch them with other girls …”
Jess: “Their sisters don’t count …”
Barb: “That’s not the point!”
Jess: “That’s not true anyway, like I’ve been with Gary for three years …”
Barb: “It’s not about you, Jess! We get it, you’re happy and have a cute fiancé. Give me a break …”
Jess: “You don’t need a guy to make you happy.”
Barb: “PahLEEZ, that’s something all the single people say to make themselves feel better about being single!”
Barb: (Trying to sound angry) “Besides, Gary doesn’t count; he’s not from here. He’s a fucking alien with his stupid hot English accent … and good goddamn morals … Good job on locking that down, by the way.”
Barb gives Jess a brief high five, then resumes her tantrum.
Barb: “Is one decent person so much to ask for? How much lower can my standards get at this point?!”
She says as she proceeds to bang the table with both arms while standing up.
Jess: “Oh, come on, I’m sure you’ll find someone …”
Barb gives all the guys in the room her death (yet still-ready-to-mingle) stare.
Barb: “You know what, I’m outta here!”
She pushes her chair and walks toward the exit when she bumps into someone.
Barb: “Hey! Watch where you’re g …”
She trails off when she looks up to see a tall guy with dark hair and beautiful hazel eyes.
Guy: “I’m so sorry, are you okay?”
His British accent was like music to her ears. She looked to Jess for approval, who was watching this interaction from afar.
Jess must’ve noticed, because she slowly mouthed, “He’s gay.”
Guy: “Hello?”
He said as another guy—just as beautiful, if not more—approached him and grabbed his hand.
Guy 2: “Our table is ready …”
He looked at both him and Barb.
Guy 2: “Is everything okay?”
Barb: “Oh, fuck off … you … fucking … beautiful people …”
She said, clearly pissed that she couldn’t come up with an insult, which made her even more pissed off.
Barb: “And fuck you, too!”
Barb looked at the ceiling as she said this, seeing as someone had to be responsible for her ill-fated love life.