HASINA FOYE
YEARS AS MENTEE: 2
GRADE: Senior
HIGH SCHOOL: A. Philip Randolph Campus High School
BORN: Bronx, NY
LIVES: Bronx, NY
MENTEE’S ANECDOTE: I remember when I first joined Girls Write Now. It’s a program where I’m able to embrace my passion for writing. Entering this program has allowed me to learn different techniques of writing, and to discover why writing is important to me. Having assistance with writing from my mentor has allowed me to connect with my writing by developing a bond and finding why I should write.
KYNDAL THOMAS
YEARS AT GIRLS WRITE NOW: 1
OCCUPATION: Community Outreach Coordinator, Girls Write Now
BORN: Allen, TX
LIVES: Brooklyn, NY
ANECDOTE: When Hasina walked into the Girls Write Now office, I was immediately struck by her warmth. Towering over me, tall and smiley, she radiated joy. As we planned for the spring semester, we bonded over our love of the iconic 1990s Friends aesthetic and our preference for handwriting over typing. She is as open, genuine, and insightful as her beautiful writing would suggest. I am so proud to have her in the program and can’t wait to see where her wonderful writing takes her!
This was inspired by my own life of having deaf parents and how this has impacted my childhood. It’s a story for readers to imagine being in my position, the thought of losing one of your abilities, and to be grateful toward the little things in life.
Imagine after a night-long sleep, you are just waking up to nothing … Just eerie quietness. Not the loud honks of traffic outside, the pots and pans clattering in the kitchen indicating something is being cooked. Just nothing, as the words you are speaking are coming out. You can’t hear yourself and think: Why does the movement of my lips feel funny and why can’t I hear anything? It takes you a couple of times to process your loss through your brain as you try to adapt. Now you’re stuck with your four senses where they heighten, improving your taste and sight.
Deafness is common among my household, as both of my parents are deaf. Not mute, just deaf. This is something they go through every day, they were just born into that circumstance. Their inability to hear themselves has made them function and view society in a different way. As others may see deafness as something to apologize about, to me it’s a blessing, but to them, a curse from God. A curse as to why they couldn’t hear like the others, to properly pronounce or just speak words and a fear that their child will inherit the deafness. It turned out to be false, but their own friends and family members have doubted their possibilities of raising a hearing child and the success that would come from it. It was enforced to my mind to prove people wrong for my mother and to not fail.
My mom was the last child of five. She was the only one that ended up deaf, which has led to her being treated differently than her siblings. My grandma would often drink alcohol for her sorrows to go away, since my mother was this “curse.” As my mother reached her teen years, my grandma prevented her because of her inability to learn how to communicate, dressing my mother in baggy, unfit clothing with nappy hair, giving her several forms of abuse and just treating her like she was “nothing.” The school saw this kind of treatment and placed her in a dormitory called Fanwood, the school for the deaf. She had easily fit in, but she felt stupid, as she didn’t receive the proper education her peers did. My mother was stuck in basic level education, as the others were in an advanced level. This has made her pass this mind-set to me of being this voice for her, continuously working hard to reach the top.
I knew I was different from the bottom to the top. My difference made me feel insecure about why I couldn’t be like the others. I used to wonder why the other kids’ parents could talk to them and hear them when mine couldn’t. I used to wonder why Mom would receive the disability checks from the government as if she’s handicapped. I used to wonder why people would mock her as she would make a sound. I used to wonder why the deaf community received special treatment.
I used to wonder why my mother would say she’s not fit for this world where she has to work ten times harder to prove herself. Lastly, I used to wonder why would they allow this to happen to them and not just speak out. My frustration and pent-up anger from my mother’s deafness made me resent my mom in a way. Most of my childhood, I didn’t really speak as much and mostly signed to my mother. People thought I was deaf due to my inability to speak so I got transferred to “47,” the American Sign Language and English Secondary School, to get speech therapy. It helped me learn to speak words but there were failed attempts at pronouncing the words correctly. My English was mostly chopped up and used in the wrong context. The help of speech therapy has taught me several improvements but has led to me stuttering as I speak. I was uncomfortable speaking out, but I easily fit in, as there were people with similarities in the school. It was where I learned about being a CODA (child of a deaf adult).
Some usual misconceptions among deaf people are that all deaf people were born deaf, can read lips, do sign language, use hearing aids to help them hear, can’t listen to music, and can’t talk. These are myths, because some deaf people are able to do it. Not all deaf people were born deaf, because some got sick or had an incident occur that made them deaf. Not all people can read lips, because it would be quite uncomfortable looking at someone’s lips 24/7. Instead, they would ask the person to write to them. In different situations, there have been people I’ve encountered who haven’t learned sign language because they were mostly taught to speak or write and some know how to do basic sign or body language. Hearings aids are helpful, as they vibrate when someone close speaks or when there is a loud noise, but it doesn’t restore their hearing. Some deaf people feel hearing aids are disrespectful because it shows the fact they can’t hear and need help from a device. Music has often been a huge impact in their life, as they feel the vibration of the beats radiating through the soul. Songs with a loud bass or drop often get them riled up. When “It Takes Two” comes on, my mother would often start popping and locking with an “ooh” sound coming out of her mouth.