Mr Mordikai was in the reception hall at the infirmary. There was no comment, no odd look when she carried Mercy to the desk with Doctor Clifton walking behind her. Everyone had heard the news. They knew that her sister had met with an accident and drowned, and that there was more to her story than met the eye.
‘Please, call the duty physician,’ she said.
‘I’ll deal with this. Mercy is my patient,’ James cut in.
‘You need treatment as well.’
‘The child comes first,’ James said. ‘Mr Mordikai, I need to speak to Mr Anthony when he comes in and I’d be grateful if you can find someone to organise a cot on the girls’ ward. Perhaps Matron can be persuaded to allow Nurse Huckstep to provide one-to-one care for as long as it’s necessary.’
‘Of course, Doctor Clifton. I’ll give her the message.’
Hannah followed James to an unoccupied examination room where she placed Mercy on the trolley and began to unwrap her from the swaddling, removing two safety pins, then unknotting an extra band of material which had been tied around the baby’s middle.
‘She’s very tightly bound,’ she observed. ‘Oh my goodness, you don’t think …? James, look how the cotton has chafed her skin. They have deliberately bound her like this to keep her small. How cruel …’
‘What with that and the gin, they have done everything they can to turn her into a freak of nature,’ James agreed. ‘We’ll tube-feed her and then we’ll make urgent enquiries to find a wet nurse. After that, I’ll find out what’s going on …’
‘With Ruby?’ she finished for him.
He nodded.
‘What about your arm?’
‘That can wait.’
‘I don’t think so. You should have those bones set as soon as possible – your patients need you. Promise me that you’ll speak to Mr Anthony this morning.’
‘Anything you say, Sister.’ He gave a small smile. ‘Let’s give this little one a dose of glucose and water, then get her on to the ward.’
Hannah wrapped her in a clean cotton cloth, wishing she had proper clothes for her: a pretty knitted barracoat or bootees trimmed with lace like her brothers had worn. Suppressing a wave of grief, she picked her up and carried her to the girls’ ward where she found Alice waiting.
‘Matron’s asked me to look after her. She’s moved one of Sister Trim’s nurses across to the Lettsom,’ she said. ‘Hannah, how are you? I’ve been thinking of you.’
‘Please, don’t speak kindly to me. I don’t think I can bear it.’
‘Let me take the baby …’
‘Keep fighting, little one.’ Hannah touched Mercy’s cheek and laid her in Alice’s arms before giving her the paperwork which James had put together. Having summarised his plans for Mercy’s care, she forced herself to continue, ‘Doctor Clifton says that the prognosis is poor. The likelihood is that she will join her mother in Heaven within the next couple of days.’
‘The poor little mite,’ Alice murmured.
‘I have to go, before my nurses take advantage of my absence. Promise me you’ll let me know if there’s any change in her condition.’
‘You know I will. How is Doctor Clifton?’
‘He’s a hero – he ended up in a fight, saving Mercy from her father who’d snatched her away from the Allspices. I dread to think what would have happened if we hadn’t found him in time – he would have left the country with her. Thanks to Mr Milani, Doctor Clifton has broken his arm. I feel terribly guilty.’
‘Sister Bentley, to my office.’ Hannah turned to face Matron who was standing at the entrance to the ward, her hands on her hips and her chin jutting forward, reminding her of a bulldog. ‘I’ve put Nurse May in charge of the Lettsom until I can find someone with more experience.’
‘It’s my ward,’ Hannah said quickly.
‘I’ve relieved you of all responsibility for now. We have much to discuss. Follow me.’
The rest of their encounter continued in Mrs Knowles’s office with the door firmly shut.
‘First of all, I’m sorry for what has happened to your sister. She’s been a good worker and an asset to the infirmary. Secondly, I wish you’d felt able to tell me what was going on – I’m not sure what I could have done, but there might have been some way to mitigate the situation before it came to this.’
Hannah stared at her apron where grey blots began to appear in the white cotton.
‘I’m not saying that your sister’s course of action could have been altered, just that the revelations could have been handled differently. I’m not going to suspend you as such, but you’ll take a week’s compassionate leave while we decide how to proceed.’
‘What about my patients? Oliver will be expecting me.’
‘I’ll find some way of covering your absence.’
‘Am I going to lose my place?’ Hannah said, looking up.
‘I’ll be raising it at the next meeting of the Board. Don’t worry – I’m on your side, but I fear that I’ll struggle to win the governors over if this episode is deemed to have brought our work here into disrepute. It’ll be in all the newspapers.’
Hannah felt sick. ‘They will drag my sister’s name through the mud.’
‘Inevitably, I think. Go home and rest.’
‘My niece requires intensive treatment – I can at least do that to relieve the burden on the other nurses.’
‘I understand your motives, but I can’t allow it. There must be no room for speculation and questions. It’s never a good idea for a family member to be nursed by another, particularly when we’re under siege from the press.’
Hannah frowned.
‘Mr Mordikai has already seen off several reporters, and we’re expecting to have to keep them at bay when they come in later, pretending to be outpatients.’ Matron’s manner softened. ‘Use this time to make the arrangements to bury your sister and I’ll be in touch as soon as I have news of our decision. You may, of course, spend time with the child.’
‘Thank you, Matron.’ Hannah hesitated. ‘May I visit the boys on the Lettsom?’
‘I don’t think it’s a good idea. I’ll ask Nurse May to speak to them – she can tell them that you’re indisposed.’
‘They’ll be worried about me.’
‘I’ll tell her to make light of it.’
‘What if they see me when I’m visiting the child?’
‘You’ll be discreet,’ Matron said firmly, and she had to be content with that.
Hannah left the office and dropped by at the mortuary where she watched over Ruby who looked for all the world as if she was sleeping.
‘Dear sister,’ she whispered hoarsely. ‘Why did you do it? Why didn’t you come to me?’ She prayed for Ruby’s soul, for the miracle of Mercy’s recovery and for James, that he would recover his strength so he could continue to practise without disability and pain. ‘I promise you, my darling, that out of love for you and little Mercy, I’ll do the right thing by her, whatever that may be. Rest in peace.’
After she’d spoken to the chaplain and the mortuary assistant about Ruby’s funeral, she made her way towards the reception hall. In the corridor, she ran into Sister Trim, who took one look at her and turned away, muttering to her companion, one of the dispensary nurses.
‘There’s no way she’ll be allowed to work here again, not after what’s happened with her sister,’ she heard her say.
‘What was that?’ Hannah turned sharply and Sister Trim stopped with her back to her.
‘You heard. What class of parent is going to allow someone like you to look after their child?’ Sister Trim spun round and glared at her.
‘My sister’s misfortunes have no bearing on my ability to do my work.’
‘Misfortunes? I’m sorry for your loss, but having a child out of wedlock is a terrible sin. Ruby was a pretty girl, lacking in morals – I was forever chasing her off my ward.’
‘Take that back. I won’t hear you speaking badly of my sister.’
‘I won’t take it back – it’s the truth. You’re no better than she is, throwing yourself in Doctor Clifton’s way all the time.’
Hannah’s face burned as she watched Sister Trim continue along the corridor with the dispensary nurse. Was this how it was going to be from now on?
She left the house. Once she’d sent telegrams to her father and uncle, she returned to their lodgings, feeling a cold draught of loneliness as she entered their old room. Mrs Wells offered her tea but little sympathy, as well she might, Hannah thought, sensing that their comforting little chat was turning into an interrogation.
‘I was thinkin’ of turfin’ you out on your ear’ole, but I’ve seen there’s no sense in that. You need a roof over your ’ead at this sad time.’
‘Thank you – I’m very grateful,’ Hannah said.
‘The gen’lemen from the papers ’ave called ’ere today.’
‘I hope you didn’t say anything.’
‘I told nothin’ but the truth as I see it. I couldn’t believe my ears when they said there was money in it. How about that then? There’s financial reward to be found in gossip and ’earsay, as well as the satisfaction of spreadin’ news of folks’ misfortunes. They said I should ’ave a reg’lar column in the newspaper. ’Ow about that?’
‘I should go,’ Hannah said, feeling sick at the thought of her private business being embellished by Mrs Wells’s imagination.
‘If there’s anythin’ you need – within reason – you only ’ave to ask.’
Hannah couldn’t stay at their lodgings. She put her hat and cape back on, and returned to the house where she went to find Alice who was on the girls’ ward, rocking Mercy in her arms.
‘How is she?’ Hannah said abruptly.
‘She’s about the same, according to Doctor Clifton.’
‘He’s been to see her? I thought he’d gone home to rest.’
‘Him, rest?’ Alice uttered a hollow laugh. ‘He never stops. He’s been in four or five times to give her glucose water by tube, and there’s a wet nurse arriving early this evening. Even so, I’ve been praying for her all day. Here. Take a seat. You hold her for a while.’ Hannah sat down, and Alice bundled the infant into her arms.
‘She’s beautiful, isn’t she?’ Alice said.
‘Like a little doll.’ The air caught in Hannah’s throat, thick like treacle, as she reached out and touched Mercy’s cheek. The baby stirred slightly, her eyes shut and her skin sallow. Hannah unwrapped her arms from the swaddling and reached for one of her tiny hands, but her fingers remained unfurled. She wrapped her up again and held her close, wishing she could breathe more life into her.
‘You might not have heard,’ Alice said, ‘Doctor Clifton has signed the death certificate so there’s no need for a public inquest, but the whole escapade is in the later editions of the papers. Mr Mordikai showed them to me.’
Hannah bit her lip. The press could assassinate Ruby’s character, but she wouldn’t let them change her opinion of her lovely, flawed sister who’d felt more passion than she would ever know in her lifetime.
‘There are rumours that you’ve been suspended …’
‘I’ve been given compassionate leave, although my future here is in the balance, depending on what the Board decides.’
‘We’ve had a whip round. There’s a few shillings waiting for you to use as you wish – perhaps for clothes for Mercy or a contribution towards your sister’s funeral. I’ll bring it round to you later.’
‘I can’t accept—’
‘You’ll take it without argument,’ Alice said sternly. ‘People around here think you’ve been hard done by. After all you’ve done for them, they want to give something back. Be grateful and take it.’
‘I don’t know how to thank you all …’
‘Oh, Hannah, sometimes even an angel needs help to find her wings again. You’ve helped so many people, it’s time you accepted some help yourself.’
‘How is Doctor Clifton?’
‘Mr Anthony told him he shouldn’t have interfered, that he was a fool to rush in where angels fear to tread, but that’s only to be expected, the way they bicker. Anyway, he gave him chloroform and put his arm in traction to line up the ends of the bone, then Mr Brightside made a cast to fit. He’s gone home now to let the plaster of Paris set. You should have heard him arguing about it – he’s a terrible patient. Anyway, Doctor Hunter’s going to step in and help out here for a few days. Mrs Hunter sends her kind wishes too.’
‘I’m mortified that James got dragged into this,’ she said.
‘He made the choice to do it. He could have gone to the police, but he wanted to be there for you.’ Gently, Alice took Mercy back. ‘Go home and get some sleep while you can.’
How could she do that? Grieving for her sister and worried about her niece’s future, she didn’t think she’d ever sleep again.
Hannah walked along the empty seafront, gazing out at the cold grey sea, and wishing that she could turn back time to the summer when she and Ruby had bought ice cream from the hokey-pokey men, and life had tasted sweet and full of promise.
Alice came to the lodging house in the morning. Mrs Wells let her in and showed her up to the room that Hannah and Ruby had shared.
‘A visitor for you, miss,’ she said. ‘Oh, you poor thing. You look as if you’ve hardly slept a wink.’
‘Thank you, Mrs Wells.’ Hannah pushed the door closed.
‘She has a nose like the parish pick-axe,’ Alice observed, taking off her cape and hanging it on the hook. ‘She’s right, though – you look dreadful. Here, I’ve brought you some breakfast – cold beef, bread and ale.’
Hannah gazed around the room, looking for somewhere to put it, but every surface was cluttered with Ruby’s bits and pieces: her sewing kit; a stray cotton-reel with its thread unwound across the bare floorboards; a grubby stocking; a bottle of scent. She picked up the bottle and removed the glass stopper, then held it to her nostrils and took a deep breath, as if by inhaling it she could bring her sister back to life.
‘You should wear it,’ Alice said gently. ‘This is Ruby’s day, after all.’
Hannah dabbed a dot of scent on each of her wrists and rubbed them together, as Alice made the bed and cleared a space on the washstand for the food, some pieces of black crape and pins. It wasn’t right. It should have been Ruby who was standing there.
‘This is too much,’ Hannah exclaimed suddenly. ‘I can’t bear it.’
‘Come here,’ Alice said, turning and holding out her arms. ‘Let me give you a hug.’
‘I feel such a fool,’ Hannah sobbed. ‘I can’t stop crying.’
‘It’s only natural to feel this way. Let’s have something to eat, then I’ll help you braid your hair.’
Hannah took a step back. ‘I don’t know what I’d do without you.’
‘You’d do the same for me.’ Alice dashed a tear from her face with the back of her hand. ‘Would you like me to help you tidy up a little?’
‘I don’t know.’ The presence of Ruby’s belongings was a comfort in a way, but also a reminder that she’d gone for good. ‘I don’t think I’m ready.’
‘Then we’ll leave it. There’s no hurry.’
‘I’m glad to see you have your appetite back,’ Hannah said, nibbling at some bread while Alice tucked into her breakfast.
Alice smiled briefly. ‘I’m making the most of it.’ She got up and washed her hands, then put Hannah’s hair up in gleaming copper braids. Hannah dressed, putting on her dark dress, cape and black shoes, and her navy hat to which she’d attached a band of black crape.
‘Thank you for coming, Alice.’
‘You aren’t obliged to go, you know. Ladies aren’t expected to attend burials.’
‘I have to go – no one else will be there and I can’t bear to think of her being alone. I’ve written to everyone, and those who’ve replied have declined to attend for various reasons. I don’t blame them.’ She fiddled with her hatpin, then put it back in its box, deciding that it wasn’t appropriate for a funeral.
She and Alice walked to the cemetery on Manston Road where a cart drew up with Ruby’s coffin, a simple wooden box, adorned with a single red rose. The sexton, four paid bearers and the chaplain from the infirmary turned up a few minutes later, followed by three carriages which halted at the wrought-iron gates.
Hannah turned away.
‘Wait. I believe they’re people who’ve come to pay their respects to your sister.’ Alice squeezed her hand.
‘I’m not expecting anyone,’ she said, as the bearers lifted the coffin from the cart and began to walk along the pathway between the yews and gravestones, none of them more than thirty years old. Keeping her eyes on the box containing her sister’s mortal remains, she followed with the chaplain and sexton behind her. Why should anyone turn up, when Ruby’s behaviour had gone against the accepted view of maternal conduct and feeling?
They made their way to a corner of the burial ground where a hole had been freshly dug. Hannah could smell the scent of the earth, and then the fragrance of cologne as the breeze ruffled the crape on her hat. She turned slowly to find herself face to face with a small procession of mourners: James who was supporting her stepmother; Doctor Hunter and Charlotte; Mrs Merry and Mrs Wells.
‘Did you know they were coming?’ she asked Alice through a veil of fresh tears. Alice nodded.
‘Nurse May wanted to be here too, but Matron couldn’t give her the time off. Your sister was loved, Hannah.’
Doctor Clifton and his cousin offered their condolences and the mourners stood at the graveside to say one last farewell. Hannah picked up a handful of earth and dropped it on the coffin as the chaplain said his final words, ‘Ashes to ashes, dust to dust.’
One by one, she thanked everyone for turning up, then whispered to Alice that she would like to go home.
‘Allow me to give you a lift,’ James said. ‘This is rather an imposition and you may, of course, choose to be alone, but I’ve arranged a small reception at the Cliftonville Hotel. Your stepmother has travelled from Canterbury and wishes to rest for a while before making the journey back. The invitation is open to everyone. Will Mrs Knowles miss you for another hour or two, Nurse Huckstep?’
‘Matron’s expecting me back, I’m afraid,’ Alice said.
‘Thank you for helping me this morning,’ Hannah said. ‘And, James, thank you for everything you’ve done. I’ll join you at the hotel – out of respect for my sister.’
James helped her into the carriage and they set off for the wake.
‘How did you come to meet my stepmother?’ she asked.
‘She turned up at the house looking for you this morning – Mr Mordikai introduced us, knowing that I’d be attending the funeral.’
‘I haven’t thanked you properly for what you’ve done for me and Mercy.’
‘I would have done the same for any child, and for you, of course. Hannah, I would do anything for you – you should know that by now.’
‘Did you see her this morning?’
‘She’s doing as well as can be expected.’
‘You mean, she’s still in danger.’
He nodded, as the brougham whisked them along the street.
‘She seemed a little better last night, but this morning …’ He said no more. He didn’t need to, Hannah thought, her heart filled with dread. ‘There was some blood …’
‘She’s still spewing up?’
He didn’t respond.
‘What can we do for her?’ Hannah was crying again. To have rescued her, only to lose her … Don’t give up now, little one. Don’t you dare, she prayed inwardly. Your ma would have wished you a long life of health and happiness. The angels aren’t ready to receive you yet.
‘I haven’t used thalassotherapy in one so young – we can but try,’ James said. ‘I’d suggest boiling the water for a while to bring the salt out, then let it cool before offering it mixed with a little warm milk.’
‘Do you think it will have side effects?’ Hannah asked.
‘We’ll monitor her very closely. At the first sign of a problem, we’ll stop.’
‘I can’t leave her at the house for much longer without a ticket. I haven’t the funds to pay for her stay.’ She felt ashamed to admit it.
‘Don’t worry about the money – I earn more than I need.’
‘I can’t impose on you any more than I already have. You know that. People are talking—’
‘Let them,’ he said.
She went on, blushing, ‘They think that we’ve formed an intimate association. They say that you’ve gone beyond the call of duty. There’s even talk that Mercy is yours …’
‘Why are you so upset about the rumour-mongering? Of course,’ he frowned, ‘you still aspire to become matron. I’m sorry for causing you grief in this matter, but I fear that it’s too late for me to take a step back – unless I hand over her care to Doctor Hunter.’
‘I’d rather you didn’t. You’ve been looking after Mercy – you know all about her.’
‘Then I will carry on. Don’t worry about me, Hannah. There was a time when I took gossip to heart.’ He lowered his voice. ‘I’m talking about the insinuations and accusations I heard when Suzanna lay dying. There were people who should have known better – Mr Anthony, for example, who suggested that my wife was a lunatic. I was livid, but in the end, I forgave him for it. Loose talk doesn’t bother me any more.’ He shrugged.
‘I’m sorry about the publicity,’ she said softly.
‘It’s fine. I’ve had new patients queuing at my door to see the hero doctor who tackled Mr Milani without a thought for his own safety. It’s been keeping me and Henry busy, which is a good thing. Have you kept up with the news?’
‘No.’ She’d stopped reading the papers when she’d spotted the headlines about how her sister had sold her infant to the ropewalker.
‘Mr Milani was dragged in front of the magistrates and committed for trial at the next assizes. He languishes in Canterbury gaol, accused of grievous bodily harm and attempted murder. It seems that Mr Allspice convinced the magistrate that there was a case to answer. There is a chance he will be hanged for his crime.’
‘I have faith that God will exact the appropriate punishment. What he did to my sister is many times worse than what he did to that blackguard, Allspice.’ She didn’t want to think of Mr Milani again. ‘How are you? How is your arm?’
He turned to her, smiling wryly. ‘It hurts, but it will mend. Bones repair more quickly than hearts, I think. I wanted to ask you – if you need occupation, something to take your mind off your troubles while you’re waiting for the Board’s decision, I’d be delighted if you’d come and work for me at the clinic.’
‘Haven’t you got staff already?’
‘I have Mrs Bellows who’s in her sixties and rather a dragon. While I’m somewhat incapacitated, I could do with some extra help. You don’t have to give me an answer straight away.’
‘No, I’d like to.’ She owed him.
‘I’ll pay you, of course.’
‘But I feel responsible for your injury—’
‘I can’t let you work for nothing. Mrs Bellows won’t admit it, but she’s struggling to keep up. With you there, she might realise that it’s time she retired, or at least reduce her hours.’
‘When can I start?’
‘Tomorrow, if you like.’
She thanked him. She had rent and bills to pay, and she wanted to buy a memorial for Ruby, a simple tribute to mark her grave – this would be her salvation.
‘Are you able to give me any news on the boys on the Lettsom? I miss them terribly.’
‘They’re missing you too. Oliver and Ronald ask after you every time. Ronald’s chest has cleared, thanks to your suggestion that we try daily steam inhalation for his lungs. As for Oliver, the news isn’t so good. I’ve warned his poor parents that he hasn’t got long left, and they’ve decided to take him home as soon as they’ve found a private nurse who can look after him. He wants to sleep in his own bed and have his family around him. I’m sorry – I wouldn’t have been so insensitive as to speak of him if you hadn’t asked.’
‘It’s all right. As long as he’s comfortable …’ Hannah’s voice faded as she thought of the boy with the bright eyes and blonde ringlets. He’d put up quite a fight, but now it seemed that God had chosen to give him his wings as he had done with Peter.
‘You must think of Ronald and how you’ve helped him,’ James said, reaching out to touch her hand. It was the briefest contact, but more comforting than any words. ‘I’ll be sending him home soon and he’ll have every chance of living a healthy and happy life.’
When they arrived at the wake, they drank a little sherry to toast Ruby’s memory before James excused himself, leaving Hannah to talk to her stepmother, who was dressed smartly in black with jet beads around her neck. She was approaching forty, yet she could pass as much younger with her slender figure and bright blonde hair.
‘I appreciate your coming, Stepmother,’ Hannah said, ‘but where is Pa?’
Her stepmother couldn’t bring herself to meet her eye. ‘I’m afraid he had a prior engagement at the office, a meeting he couldn’t possibly postpone. He allowed me to attend instead, wanting to keep up appearances.’
‘What can be so important that he can’t put aside one day to bury his daughter?’
‘He sends his regards, and regrets. Those are his exact words.’
‘What about Christopher?’
‘We haven’t told him yet – he’s away at school until Easter, and your father felt that his studies shouldn’t be disturbed. He’s doing very well – we’re very proud of him. Hannah, what happened?’
‘I’m sure you’ve seen the papers,’ Hannah said, recalling how Pa used to read them every day at breakfast.
‘I want to hear it from you.’ A tear like a diamond formed in the corner of her stepmother’s eye and rolled down her cheek. ‘When I married your father, I was very young – I resented having to take on you and Ruby and I’ll always regret not trying harder to befriend you. I couldn’t be a mother to you – I didn’t know how.
‘After you left home, Ruby and I spent more time together, sharing our interests in reading and fashion. I grew rather fond of her, so I was terribly upset when she ran away. I begged your father to fetch her back, but he said she’d made her bed and she’d have to lie in it. Believe me, I did try. I wanted her to be happy, but she had this self-destructive, wilful streak. Did she tell you that Cook found her in an embrace with the butcher’s boy?’
‘She always denied it,’ Hannah said.
‘I asked your father to send her away for a while so the whole sorry episode could be forgotten, but he locked her indoors instead and kept her prisoner. Hannah, I wrote to you about this several times to warn you to keep a close eye on her.’
‘I didn’t receive any letters.’ Hannah frowned, then began to wonder. Ruby must have intercepted them and thrown them on the fire. It was just what she would have done to hide her shame.
‘I wondered why you didn’t write back. Oh dear, your sister became very secretive. I wish I’d come to warn you in person.’
‘It’s no use,’ Hannah said. ‘I have to look forward now, for Ruby’s daughter.’
‘How is she? The doctor told me that she was at the infirmary.’
Hannah shook her head, hardly able to speak.
‘I see.’ Stepmother took her hand. ‘If there’s anything I can do, let me know.’
It was a platitude, Hannah realised. Her stepmother might have professed her affection for Ruby, but she had no interest in her illegitimate child. Admitting one had a bastard in the family was like announcing one had the plague.