Dawson watched as his ex-wife stood in his kitchen, tracing the letters on the necklace using her index finger. Autumn had changed. A thought struck that maybe she’d been in an accident and suffered some type of head trauma. She pretended to know the house even though she never lived in it. In fact, he’d moved in three months ago after some tweaks to the original plan—a plan she’d helped him design.
The two of them had made big plans to move into the home that she was going to decorate. He’d even started contemplating the next logical step, a family. But those plans had never gotten off the ground.
After working with the contractor to make enough changes for the house to feel like his and not theirs, he’d moved in. It only took a few phone calls and clicks to cancel all the furniture and decorations she’d ordered. The custom pieces had been finished and donated to the House of Hope for abused women and their children.
With the addition of oversize leather couches and a large metal star hanging over the fireplace, the place had become home for the bachelor.
The twist of fate that brought Autumn into the space he never thought she’d see had him off-balance. He needed to stay focused. He poured a cup of coffee and took a couple of sips. It was time for answers.
“Why did you say you did it?” He started right in with one of the biggest.
She ducked her head, chin to chest. Her mannerisms were different from a year and a half ago. It was an odd sensation to be staring at a woman he’d known intimately and yet feel like he was staring at a total stranger now. Could the fact he was looking at his ex through a new lens be the impact of divorce?
“I was desperate.” Well, now he felt like he was starting to get somewhere. He’d been beginning to think this wasn’t Autumn at all, which was crazy because she looked exactly like her.
“Why?”
“Believe me when I say you really don’t want to know.” There was no conviction in those words. There was sadness in spades and a lost quality that caused a knot to form in his gut.
“Why not let me be the judge of that? I think I have a pretty good handle on what I do and do not want to know.” That came out a little harsher than he’d intended. He tried to soften his tone when he said, “Believe it or not, I’d like to help.”
“You can’t. This is something I have to deal with on my own.” Now her intention came out loud and clear. Hurt and stubbornness laced her tone.
“Will you at least tell me why you have to deal with this by yourself?”
She shook her head and didn’t make eye contact.
“Does this have anything to do with why you walked out on our relationship?” His bruised ego needed to know because that darn thing still licked his wounds.
“I didn’t give you a reason?” This time, she made eye contact. Eyes wide with a look of disbelief caused more questions to form in his thoughts.
“No. But it’s not too late. Tell me why. Your note didn’t explain what went wrong. I thought we had a good thing going. Granted, looking back, it wasn’t perfect, but we had a base to build on.”
“I’m sorry. I can’t do this with you right now.” The hint of fear in her voice didn’t get past him.
“Do what? Finally answer a question? Give me the real reason why you left our marriage after exchanging vows? In case you didn’t notice, I took those seriously.” He pushed even though he knew better. As a seasoned law enforcement officer, he had developed and honed instincts that told him he was doing nothing but backing her into a corner. Just like the coyote, she’d bite.
“I didn’t deserve you.” She broke eye contact and guilt stabbed at him. But guilt for what? Why was he suddenly feeling like a jerk for making her feel bad? She’d walked away from their marriage not the other way around. Losing the pregnancy had been even harder on her than it had on him, but he hadn’t seen a need for a divorce despite that being the reason for the marriage in the first place.
Her admission struck a nerve. It was impossible, though, not to feel like he was forcing his help on her right now. She was in a desperate situation and he’d been pushing her to take his aid.
“It’s not fair of me to put you in the position of explaining yourself. You didn’t ask for me to show up today—”
“Which doesn’t mean I’m not grateful you did.” She had the necklace draped over her opened hand. Giving her back something that she so obviously cared about made him feel like maybe this day hadn’t been a total mistake.
“It seems like you’ve gotten yourself into a situation that maybe you’re having a hard time figuring out how to get out of. We’ve all been there—”
She clucked her tongue. “Somehow I doubt that. I can’t imagine a man like you would know anything about regret.”
Dawson stood there for a long moment, taking in her body language. Shoulders tensed, her feet aimed toward the back door, everything about her said she was in for a quick exit. It was his fool pride wanting answers from someone who so clearly didn’t care about the marriage as much as he did. Hadn’t cared. Past tense.
“Okay, let me try this another way.” He motioned toward the sets of keys. They hung on a key rack nailed to the side cabinet near the hallway that led to the garage. “There are several vehicles in the garage. I’m sure it won’t be too hard to figure out which key belongs to what vehicle. Take whatever you want. No questions asked. You don’t have to worry about returning anything. I’m not bringing in the law.”
“You are the law. And didn’t you just post bail for me? Won’t you get into trouble if I disappear?”
“My lawyer can tie up the courts for years until they forget all about my connection to you and technically all I did was sign paperwork to get you released. We both know you’re innocent, Autumn.” A strange look passed behind her eyes when he said her name. He didn’t go into the fact that he’d put his reputation on the line to help her. “Tell me an amount and I can pretty much have as much money as you need at your disposal.” He checked the clock hanging over the cabinets in the kitchen. “Bank is about to close.” Of course, he could call up his banker at any moment and have the bank reopened for him. A selfish part of him wanted to stall for time, maybe wanted a little bit more time with Autumn before she disappeared again.
She just stood there, a blank look on her face. “You would do all that for me?”
He waved her comment off like it was nothing.
“Seriously?” She started pacing. “That’s pretty much the nicest thing anyone’s ever volunteered to do for me.” She glanced up at him nervously. “I mean, there are so many nice things you did when we were married but I walked out on you.”
His ex didn’t seem to remember much about their past. Had something happened? Trauma? Working the angle that she’d somehow lost her memory, he asked, “Really? You remember nice things I did for you? Name one.”
“I-UH—” SUMMER DREW a blank. And then an obvious answer smacked her between the eyes. “You asked me to marry you.”
His eyebrow shot up.
“And there were so many other things that it’s hard to remember them all right now.” She gripped her forehead, trying to stave off the massive headache forming in the backs of her eyes. Headaches were like that. They had a way of taking seed and then sprouting tentacles that seemed to wrap around her brain and squeeze.
“Did something happen to you, Autumn? Were you in some kind of accident?”
His questions registered. He thought she was suffering from some kind of brain trauma, which basically meant Autumn never told Dawson about her. It would be so easy to go along with that line, a quick escape out of an almost unbearable situation. But she couldn’t go there. “No. I wasn’t, Dawson.”
“You’ve changed a lot in the past year and a half. More than I expected. I mean, you look like my ex-wife. There’s no debating that. But it feels like I’m talking to a complete stranger. On the outside, it’s you but you don’t act like her. Her mannerisms are totally different. And I just thought there had to be an easy explanation.”
She wanted to give him one. She wanted to help him make sense of a marriage that had been cut short. She wanted to give him answers he seemed to crave in order to go on with his life. He seemed like the kind of person who deserved that and so much more. But how without adding fuel to an already blazing fire?
If she came clean with him right then and there, it would only lead to more questions. Worse yet, he might want to get involved and end up hurt or dead. That would be on her conscience for the rest of her life.
“Money would be a huge help, but only as a loan. You have to promise to let me pay it back.” She could use a cash infusion to keep her off the grid. The investigation had to be put on the back burner until the situation cooled off. She’d riled someone up. Maybe she could rent a cabin in the woods until life chilled out again.
“Done. How much do you need?”
“A couple thousand dollars if you can spare it.” She almost winced saying the number out loud.
“I can do a whole lot better than that. Twenty-five thousand—”
“I’d never be able to pay that much back.” She blinked at him, a little bit dumbfounded. Her sister had said the man she’d married came from a wealthy family. Summer couldn’t even fathom someone who could conjure up that kind of cash on a moment’s notice.
“You don’t have to. It’s yours already. Remember? I put it in your account when we got married and you never used it.”
“Now I know you’re lying.” Or testing her. The latter made more sense.
“The money is sitting in your account. What you do with it is your own business.” There was a sadness to his tone she didn’t want to pick up on. She couldn’t afford to care about his feelings right now, not when there was so much at stake. The fact she was aware that he tried to cover with a sharp edge to his tone made everything so much worse.
“You said I could borrow a vehicle...”
“Take whatever you need. There are several in the garage to choose from. You didn’t take your own when you left—”
She was already shaking her head before he finished his sentence. “I’d like to borrow one of yours. Preferably something I’ve never driven before.”
He’d mentioned that the bank was almost closed. They needed to hurry if she was going to get out of there. “Is there any chance we can make it into town tonight?”
“It’s too late to go through normal procedures.” He glanced away from her when he spoke. What was he hiding?
Summer ran through possibilities in her mind. She could take twenty-five thousand dollars in cash and disappear for a while. Then what?
Keep on running the rest of her life? She’d been living a lie recently and it was coming back to bite her. Would she turn out exactly like her sister? Lying and then covering up the lies. Could she convince herself it was all for the best? That the only reason she lied was to help other people? Could she walk away from investigating her sister’s disappearance? Because if she did that, she wouldn’t recognize herself anymore.
Staring at a pair of honest honey-brown eyes standing a few feet in front of her, she realized that she could never be the kind of person who could look into them and lie. That even little white lies meant to protect others ended up hurting them more than anything else.
Telling Dawson the truth was risky. It could put him in danger. Not telling him seemed like it could also put him in harm’s way. Especially if he started digging around to figure out what was really going on.
Ignorance wasn’t always bliss. Sometimes, it could kill.
She decided to clear up this whole mess by coming clean with him. He worked in law enforcement and he seemed to care about her sister. He would know how to protect himself if he was aware of a threat. When she really thought about it, he was a US marshal. Weren’t they involved in witness protection? She personally had no idea.
“Dawson, I’m going to tell you something that you might not be ready to hear. You deserve to know the truth.” Just saying those words caused her heart to hammer her rib cage.
He set his coffee cup down on the granite countertop and crossed his arms over his chest like he was bracing himself for the worst.
“I don’t know much about your marriage except that I know you got married on the last day of January.” She held her hand up to stop him from speaking before he could respond because she could already see the questions forming in his eyes. “I was honest before. I haven’t been in an accident or had any kind of head trauma.”
“Then, what?”
Speaking the words out loud was proving to be so much harder than saying them in her head. She was trying to think of a way to ease him into the news rather than blurt it out and completely shock him. “There’s a really good reason why I don’t know anything about this house or the life we shared together other than the fact that I know it was brief.”
“Well then, you need to clue me in because I have no idea how you could forget the fact that you never lived in this house. You looked at Laurel like you’ve never seen her before and yet the two of you used to work side by side and talk for hours.”
“I’m sorry. I’m seeing how difficult all of this is for you—”
“You can spare me your sympathy, Autumn. Just tell me the truth.”
“Well then, let’s start right there. My name is not Autumn.” She held up the necklace and took a step toward him, noticing how the grooves in his forehead deepened. “My name is Summer.”
“You lied to me?” He gripped the edge of the counter like he needed to ground himself.
“No, I didn’t. I’ve never met you before in my life. You were married to my identical twin sister.”