Chapter 44

Holly drove through the desert, the radio turned to a seventies’ station. Ramblin’ Man by the Allman Brothers—one of her favorite songs—oozed out the speakers, but she barely heard it.

After leaving the mansion, she’d gotten in her car and gone back to her apartment. Numbness had settled over her, and she’d barely even noticed the mess the police had left. She’d picked up a suitcase off the floor and looked around for clothing she wanted. Once she’d had what she needed, she’d left, with no intention of ever going back.

She’d found an affordable hotel that didn’t seem to be dirty, one where she’d feel safe in staying alone, and paid cash. After unpacking her bags, she’d lain down on the bed and looked at the clock. It had read four in the morning, and she’d closed her eyes, waking twelve hours later.

With great effort, she’d rolled out of bed and pulled on her running gear. Although she would prefer to crawl under the covers and cry her eyes out, she would not allow herself to do that.

She’d run through the city, pushing her anger, hurt, and betrayal into energy, and not caring who saw her or what the consequences would be if the police stopped her.

Fuck everyone.

She’d leapt onto a cement bench, taken two steps, and flown off the other end, catching a tree limb. She’d swung there for a moment, the bark scraping her hands. She’d paid no attention to it. Landing, she’d tucked and rolled, then got to her feet again in one fluid motion. It had seemed no matter how hard she pushed herself, she couldn’t outrun her feelings.

What a surprise.

After two miles, she’d given up and jogged back to the hotel, picking up a sandwich and a bottle of wine on the way. After showering, she’d watched reruns of M.A.S.H while eating and finishing the wine, then turned off the lights and fell asleep.

The next morning, she’d reported to work, fully expecting a lot of problems with her absence. She’d had no idea what the letter sent to her supervisor had said, but instead of being angry, he’d been very sympathetic and had asked very few questions.

As she drove through the desert, she tried to keep her mind in that place of numbness, where she felt very little and she didn’t think about him.

Son of a bitch.

She’d made brief inquiries on Lieutenant Justice this week, only to be met with blank stares. A friend of hers worked in the records department, and Holly had asked her to research him, but nothing came up, even from the California office, where he said he had been stationed.

He’d lied to her about being in the military.

Her first instinct had been to tell her superiors about him, but something held her back. Whether it had been her feelings or the fact he’d helped her out of her dire situation, she didn’t know. However, she didn’t think he needed the military after him, even if he had been a complete fraud.

She’d spent most of her time off looking for a place to live, but couldn’t muster much enthusiasm for anything she’d seen. In fact, she couldn’t get excited about anything in her life, but at some point, she needed to move out of the hotel and start over.

She pulled up to the bunker where they had first met, and the tears stung her eyes. They’d had their first kiss here.

But she couldn’t think about that.

“Just check the damn thing out and make sure everything is locked up and get the hell out,” she murmured.

She got out of the jeep and went to the door with so many more questions about Justice now than when she had been sleeping with him.

“A good fuck can damage your critical thinking,” she said as she unlocked the door.

She shut it, letting her eyes adjust to the darkness for a moment, then she turned to the left and found the light switch.

“Holly.”

She spun and gasped, her heart beating wildly.

Justice stood at the chain link fence leading down to the rest of the bunker. A bolt of fear ran through her until she noticed he stood with his hands at his sides, dressed in camouflage pants and a military t-shirt and boots. His stance seemed completely harmless.

Part of her wanted to cry and throw herself at him while the other part wanted to gut him from sternum to pelvis.

“I’m not here to hurt you,” he murmured, keeping his hands at his side.

She studied his face and noted the hope in his eyes, as if he wanted her to believe him.

“What do you want?” she bit out. Her emotions seemed to be swinging from killing him to hugging him, and the tears in her eyes pissed her off even more.

“I’m here to tell you the truth.”

Well, she hadn’t been expecting that.

She crossed her arms over her chest. “Hmm … I think that would be a novel concept for you.”

He grinned and glanced down at the floor, then met her gaze again. “Yes. With you, it will be, and I’m so sorry, Holly. I’m sorry for the lies and deceit and for being an all-around bastard. All I ask is that you hear me out and save your judgments until I’m done with my story.”

She shook her head. “After that crap you pulled at your friend’s mansion, you’ve already been on trial and the jury found you guilty, Justice—if that’s even your real name. I don’t even know if that’s your last name or your first name, but who in the hell names their kid Justice?”

He looked as if he would answer her, but she cut him off and began pacing, her anger building. “I have never been dumped so harshly. Never. What you did was beyond cold. You didn’t want to be with me? Fine. But at least give me the respect and tell it to my face, not leave some fucking note on the counter and abandon me in some stranger’s house with a checkout time!”

Her voice echoed around the chamber, and she realized she’d been yelling. Justice stood just as she found him, staring at her.

“I know,” he pleaded. “It was terrible what I did to you, but I want to explain. I want you to know the truth about everything, Holly.”

She saw honesty in his face that she’d never noticed before, and it softened her just a bit. Curiosity also got the best of her—she wanted to hear what he had to say.

“So, let’s hear it. But how will I even know it’s the truth? Once you deceive a person, it’s hard to get their trust back. And right now, I trust you about as much as I would an angry rattle snake.”

He flinched at her words, but then nodded. “I can understand that. I’m just asking for a little bit of your time. When I’m done with my explanation, you can do as you please. I just can’t live with myself without at least trying.”

“Trying to do what?”

He shook his head. “Later. I’ll tell you that later. Now, can I please have a few minutes of your time?”

She stared at him a beat, knowing she should arrest him for trespassing, or at least tell her superiors that someone needed to change the damn locks in this place.

“Please, Holly. I’ve been waiting here for you since last night hoping you’d show up. I want to explain everything to you.”

Curiosity overrode duty, and she nodded. “Okay.”

He grinned, turned around, and opened the gate leading down into the rest of the bunker. “After you.”

She shook her head. “I’m not going down there with you. Are you nuts? I don’t even know your real name!”

“My name’s Justice. I’m unarmed, but I see you’re carrying. I’ll stay at least six feet away from you at all times, and if it makes you feel safer, you can train your weapon on me for as long as you need to.”

“Why can’t you just tell me everything right here? Why do I have to go down there?”

“Because, I want to show you things. It all started right here, Holly. I want to give you proof of my words—I want you to see it.”

It probably wouldn’t be considered smart to go into the bowels of the bunker with him, but she had to admit, she needed answers to what happened between them.

Withdrawing her weapon, she pointed it at him. “Fine. Let’s go. You first. And don’t try anything, Justice, because I’m so pissed at you right now, I won’t think twice about putting a few bullets in you.”

He snickered and nodded. “I have no doubt, Holly. None whatsoever.”