Norman paced the perimeter of his townhouse’s large sunken living room like a caged panther. He didn’t know why he felt so tense and out-of-sorts. The names and faces of the many women he’d dated slipped through his thoughts. Grimacing, he remembered how his older brothers, Cleotis and Leon, had taught him everything he needed to know about women. When he became a man, little had changed. He’d become quite a ladies’ man, dating one woman or another, or several, taking them out, and then, after an evening of hot sex, on to the next one—never meaning any of them any good. Commitment and marriage were not options.
Norman found the remote and flipped on the television, finding a news program. He listened to a report about how terrorists blew up a train in Spain, and how Haiti had gotten a new president. Deciding that was too serious for him at that time, he flipped to a movie on the Sci-Fi Channel. When he walked into the kitchen, the coffeemaker caught his eye. He prepared the pot with some Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee beans and turned the power on. He needed to be fully awake because he had some thinking to do.
Norman didn’t realize it before he met Valerie, but there was something missing from his life: the love of a good woman. Sure, he’d dated one woman, then the next, but that was becoming old to him. At thirty, he felt he needed to stop the drama, find a woman to settle down with, and make some babies.
He ambled over to the countertop and fixed himself a cup of the steaming hot brew. He blew on it and sipped. No one had to knock him upside his head about how and where to find a good woman. Norman already knew one—Valerie!
He realized that she was perfect for him in every way. His brain seemed to be in overdrive as he thought about how Valerie was beautiful, intelligent, classy, talented, and she had grit to complete the package. To his way of thinking, Valerie was just right for him but was more than he deserved.
After all, Norman couldn’t forget his checkered past with the numerous women he’d bedded but had meant no good. Would bad karma come back to bite him? Would he land Valerie, only to lose her to some fast-talking slickster who’d want nothing more than a cheap fling? Norman couldn’t let that worry him just then. He had things to do. He had to somehow put his past in perspective, step to Valerie, and let her know exactly how he felt about her. Norman Grant had good sense—and plenty of it. It told him that he’d better grab her and do so in a hurry. I’m positive that Valerie’s the one, he thought, walking into his spacious bedroom. I’d better scoop her up before someone else does.
Valerie came to rehearsal the following Thursday night exactly on time. Although her bearing was stiff and proud, her spirit was in chaos. She didn’t arrive early to practice praise songs, since she’d learned them all, or to spend extra time rehearsing her solo parts.
Norman called her over and spoke to her away from the other choir members, who were looking over some new sheet music. “What happened to you, tonight, Valerie? You didn’t call me to say you weren’t coming in early like we’ve always done,” he quizzed, hoping for a plausible explanation even though he hadn’t talked to her since the picnic.
Being so near Norman both excited and disturbed her. She felt as if she were frozen in limbo, to the point where she couldn’t make decisions or take any action where he was concerned. “I had something else to do,” she snapped, turning her face away from him. Tormented by confusing emotions, Valerie swam through a haze of thoughts and desires.
He stared at her, baffled as to why she was so cold and terse toward him after what they’d shared in the park. Didn’t she feel the chemistry between us? he wondered. Norman didn’t have an inkling what could have spooked her, but he would find out—or he would die trying. But at that moment, he had a restless choir to attend to. “We’ll pick this up later, Valerie,” he informed her, taking his seat at the piano.
She went back to her seat, cradling her head in her trembling hands until it was time to go over her new solo.
Valerie kept up her silent treatment for nearly three weeks, ignoring Norman’s around-the-clock phone calls. She didn’t return any of them, but she continued to go to choir rehearsal. She left right after it was over and turned down his offers to have coffee or latte at the café in town. Tossing her hair across her shoulders in an act of defiance when Norman asked her out, she felt nauseous from the struggle that brewed within her. All of her loneliness, confusion, and the love she felt for him welded together in an upsurge of devouring yearning. I love you, but I can’t be with you, she thought, wondering if she should confess what was really bothering her.
Valerie went about her life as if Norman didn’t exist. He crossed her mind every now and then, but she ignored those thoughts and immersed herself in working lots of overtime. When she didn’t do that, she worked on extra projects from home.
As she was working on a project one night, Valerie felt a trapdoor open on the floor of her stomach as she heard the song, “All About You,” playing on the “Loving After Dark” program on her favorite radio station. Bile rose in her throat when the deejay announced that the singer’s name was Trina Tucker, but Valerie knew better.
She didn’t realize that her fists were balled up, but they were—and they convulsed with rage. In a clean sweep, she knocked all of the supplies and materials she’d been working with off her drafting table. Adrenaline pulsed through her arteries, inflaming her body. Valerie broke down and cried as the memories came flooding back in her mind.
She remembered hearing other singers croon her songs on the radio, and a few of them made the top ten lists on the Billboard magazine R&B charts. Had Lucas Williams been an honest producer, Valerie would have been a very wealthy woman because of all of the royalties she would have received.
Valerie pounded her fists on the table, still crying uncontrollably. “Why did Lucas steal my songs and give them to other singers?” she wailed into the air. No one was there to give her the answers she so badly needed. Girlfriend looked at her with a blank expression on her tiny face. “Why did he steal the thing that mattered so much to me? All I wanted to do was sing!”
After having such awful things happen at the hands of a man who claimed to love her, how could she possibly allow herself to give in to her love for Norman? How could Valerie trust him after she’d vowed that, after Lucas, she’d never trust another man ever again? Or fall in love?
Valerie felt as if she had a monopoly on being hurt. She’d been there, done that, and she wasn’t ready to revisit that place just yet. Deep in her soul, she loved Norman, but she knew he’d only take her back there. Valerie Cherrelle Freeman wasn’t having it!
The next night, Valerie brought home a project to finish up. Her boss had reminded her that the billboard design for the new travel destination promotion was overdue, and she wanted it yesterday. Since two of the senior artists had resigned and one was out on maternity leave, Valerie had been swamped with their workload. Because she was cool with her boss, Valerie asked for an extra day, assuring her that she’d finish the design at home. She promised her superior that it would be on her desk the next day.
Strictly old school when it came to designing anything, Valerie always worked manually so she’d have a backup copy if the computer malfunctioned. She’d just finished the design and was duplicating it on the computer’s desktop publishing program when she began tapping the keys in synch to the rhythm of the drippy bathroom sink faucet. Valerie didn’t notice she was doing it until the dripping stopped, then she stopped. When it resumed pounding out its beat, so did Valerie.
As the evening wore on and the pressure mounted for her to finish the project, Valerie’s nerves became frayed. The faucet’s leaking certainly didn’t help matters. Her right eye twitched, and she constantly ran her hands through her hair. “Okay, enough! I’ve had it!” she blurted out, padding across the floor to the bathroom to examine the leak. “This drip-drip-drip is driving me mad.”
Valerie didn’t know what she needed to make it stop, but she was determined to find out. A half hour later, she found herself at the Red Oaks shopping area on Main Street.
Valerie entered the Red Oaks True Value Hardware Store and waited in line for the clerk, an older, settled man, to assist her. After waiting on two customers, he finally got to her.
“Good evening, ma’am, lovely breeze we’re having,” he smiled. “What may I help you with, today?”
“My bathroom sink’s faucet’s leaking, and I need to fix it.”
He exuded a quiet air of authority and warmth. “Is your hot water or cold water faucet leaking, ma’am?”
Valerie looked at him with a puzzled expression on her face, not knowing it made any difference. “Hot water.”
“Okay, that’s an easy do.” He excused himself and went around the store collecting several items, then placed them on the counter for her. “Here’s everything you need to fix that sink. Here are some pliers, an adjustable wrench, a screwdriver, and a repair kit with various size washers and screens. I’m also including some written instructions from our website and some duct tape to hold things in place if you don’t have an extra pair of hands available.”
Valerie thanked him, knowing that he had given her exceptional service. She’d never fixed a leaky faucet before, but she was determined to do it herself. She didn’t have the time or the patience to sit and wait for a repairman to do it. She paid the salesman and was on her way out of the store. Not paying attention to where she was going, Valerie accidentally bumped into someone.
“I’m so sorry, I—” She stopped mid-sentence when she looked up at a handsome man she knew very well.
“Valerie, what a nice surprise to run into you, here,” Norman chuckled, smiling as he remembered the pleasure of their kisses under the oak tree.
She felt the surging power of his presence, and noticed that he eyed her with scorching intent. She couldn’t help but feel turned on, despite her attempts not to. “Yes, it’s good to see you, too, Norman. What are you doing here?” That was all she could think to say.
“I came to pick up some picture hangers. I bought several paintings from an art show last week, and I want to hang them up.”
She perused his tall well-toned body. The man was exquisite: there was no other word to describe someone so powerfully built. “I see.”
“Valerie, I know something’s wrong, and I won’t get into that right now. I noticed what you bought a few minutes ago, and I know you have a leaky faucet. Please, let me fix it for you. I’m very handy that way.”
“Thanks, but that’s okay. I’ll do it myself.”
His insides warmed because he found her even more desirable because she was so unreachable. He knew that her pride stood in the way of accepting his help or asking for it. He admired that. “Really Valerie, I insist. You’d probably do a great job yourself, but please let me help you. I enjoy tinkering and fixing things around the house.”
They continued bantering back and forth about his fixing her sink. What Valerie really wanted to do was tell him to go away, but she didn’t because a crowd of nosy townspeople—who were also members she recognized from Red Oaks Christian Fellowship—had a ringside stance, enjoying their little floorshow. They seemed to be latching on to every word, and she knew that Red Oaks was like any other small town. Everyone knew everyone else and was prone to gossip about everything they heard or saw. Not wanting to be grist for the Red Oaks gossip mill, she agreed to let Norman help her. If these folks were going to have something to talk about, her business wouldn’t be one of the topics.
Thinking ahead, Valerie told Norman to follow her in his car. That way, when he was finished with her sink, he could leave.
Soon, they arrived at her house, and, after taking off his jacket, Norman rolled up his sleeves and got right to work.
There was still the matter of a question that hung between them, unasked and not discussed. “Valerie, you’ve been so cold toward me, lately. Did I do something that I might not realize?” he asked, fiddling with the sink.
She wasn’t sure if now was the time to tell Norman what was going on in her head. But if she wasn’t anything else, she was fair. As things stood, it wasn’t right of her to treat him so horribly when he’d done nothing wrong. The tension Valerie felt rose. She felt the palms of her hands get clammy, and she wrung them together. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she began. “When I was in college, I made a bad mistake, Norman. I met a music producer, Lucas Williams, who told me that he could help me get a record deal with a major New York label—and I believed him.” She handed a wrench to Norman.
“Why shouldn’t you have believed him if he presented himself as a professional?” he asked. “Did you have any reason to doubt him?”
“No, that’s just it,” she reminisced. “In the beginning, he was nothing but professional. He worked with me on my voice, wrote songs with me, then recorded those songs, as well as some I wrote. We even completed a master demo tape.”
“Wow, a demo tape? You should’ve been on your way. Pass the pliers, please.”
She passed them and continued her story. “Yes and no. Yes, that demo was to be shopped to the major record companies in New York, and we even discussed going through some of the labels in Nashville to tap into the country market. But no, nothing he promised ever happened.”
His chest became heavy with pity because he had a bad feeling about what she was going to say. “Why not, Valerie?”
A bleak, wintry feeling engulfed her. “He made me fall in love with him, took my virginity, and led me to believe he loved me and that we’d get married. But when I got to the restaurant he had chosen for our engagement, where he was to give me the ring…He stood me up.”
Norman’s heart broke for her. He was beginning to understand why she was so afraid, and why she pulled away from him so suddenly after their relationship had reached a new plateau. “That’s awful, Valerie. That’s one of the lowest things a man can do to a woman.”
She passed him a small washer and watched him change the worn-out device that was making her sink leak. “You think so, huh? Well, it gets worse. I went to the studio where we had recorded, which happened to be in the same complex where he lived. I thought that I’d lost my mind, because the studio was empty. Everything was gone—equipment, our tapes, the master reel, and all my songs! I found the housing manager, and he told me that Lucas had moved away, and he hadn’t given management or anyone else advance notice.”
“Valerie, don’t beat up on yourself. You did nothing wrong; the guy was a liar from the get-go.”
Stress lines formed on her brow and her eyes were haunted with anxiety. “That’s not all. I cried so much and so hard that I made myself sick and almost flunked out of school. That happened in my junior year, but my parents and big sister helped pull me through with their prayers and TLC. That was bad enough, but what nearly killed me was hearing the songs that I had written and worked so hard on being sung by someone else! I knew they were mine and that I was owed some money. Well, I took everything I had to prove it to a lawyer. When he looked into the case, he told me that Lucas had the rights to them in perpetuity because I had signed some papers to that effect that his lawyer had drawn up. My attorney said that although that type of contract was unethical, it wasn’t illegal. So there wasn’t anything I could do.”
Norman sucked in a breath. “Ouch, that must’ve hurt, Valerie.”
“It did, and for a long time, I wouldn’t and couldn’t listen to the radio, because they played several of my songs. They’d hit the top of the charts, and I knew that Lucas was living large off my money and my lyrics. I also couldn’t get involved with another man and give him my heart. I won’t let any man hurt me ever again, Norman, not ever!” Tears cascaded down her cheeks, cleansing her of what she’d kept hidden away inside of her for so long.
So badly did Norman want to take her hurt away. If he could have borne it for her, he would have. He swept her into his loving arms, molding her body to his to keep her safe and secure. “I’m here, and I’ll never hurt you, and I won’t let anyone else hurt you. I will protect you, Valerie.”
She kept her head on his hard chest until there weren’t any tears left. She felt lighter having gotten that heavy burden out of her system, but she knew she wasn’t quite ready to pursue a relationship with Norman yet. Her heart just wasn’t ready. “Thanks, Norman, but I can take care of myself. I don’t need you to protect me.”
Looking into her eyes, cupping her chin and tilting it up so her eyes would meet his, he declared, “I love you, Valerie Freeman.”
Although his words made her heart thud and her pulse race like never before, she couldn’t and wouldn’t process it—not right now—that would only complicate things for her. So she took the high road. “Thanks for fixing my sink, Norman. I really appreciate your help.” With that, she gave him his jacket and pressed a twenty-dollar bill in his hand. Then, she opened the door and wished him a safe journey home.