‘You are fucking kidding me?’ was Betga’s response to the news over the phone of Maserov’s Radhakrishnan meeting. He was delighted for his friend and colleague and also saw the likely benefits for himself. Perhaps best of all, it represented a kind of David slaying of Goliath wherein Hamilton was the Philistine unexpectedly brought down.
‘Maserov, this is unbelievable! This is the stuff of legend, it’s a once-in-a-generation event. You’ll be telling your grandchildren about this.’
‘I think my grandchildren would rather know why I did nothing to ameliorate climate change.’
‘Forget climate change, Maserov, we’re talking about making partner in a depressed economy. And as a Second Year . . . one with a target on his head. I’m honoured to know you and to have been a not insignificant part of this. I’ve got to hand it to you, Maserov. This hurts Hamilton more than anything I ever dreamed of doing to him.’
‘Listen Betga, you’ve never actually told me what Hamilton did to you. What did he do?’
Betga exhaled. ‘Okay, so first of all, I was a victim of all of the shit that you and everyone else has to put up with from him; the mind games, impossible deadlines, late nights, humiliation in meetings, you name it. But then there was something, something way out of left field. You know he always calls his secretary “Joy”?’
‘Yeah.’
‘Well, she . . . Oh shit! Hang on, Maserov. Wait. Marietta’s crying. She’s just woken up and she’s crying . . . probably hungry or . . . maybe . . . I need to change her. Listen, Maserov, I’m going to have to call you back.’
‘This is wonderful, Stephen! I can’t believe it!’ exclaimed Jessica when he later told her of the proposal Radhakrishnan had put to him. ‘But is this what you want? I’m not saying it shouldn’t be. You’d be cementing yourself into Freely Savage. Don’t get me wrong, this is amazing news. But is it what you really want?’ she asked hesitantly.
‘What are you going to do?’ Eleanor said when he told her.
‘I don’t know,’ Maserov told his wife.
‘You’re their sacrificial lamb. These “heroic” partners who choose to hide behind you finally get a chance to de-fang Hamilton at no cost to them. If it doesn’t work or if word gets out, you’ll suffer the consequences and they’ll be back in business as usual.’
‘Yeah, it’s pretty clever on their part, isn’t it?’
‘It manages to be ruthless and yet cowardly. If it works, these will be the distinguishing characteristics of your partners.’
‘Not all of them, just the best of them.’
‘Aren’t you worried that they’re just using you?’
‘Everyone there is just using everyone else there.’
‘Stephen, I worry about you.’
‘Do you?’
‘Of course, don’t you know that?’
In a quiet voice, without anger or recrimination he asked Eleanor, ‘How should I know that? Really, I mean that. How should I know?’
It was a voice she found irresistible and she began to cry. ‘Stephen, I think we should try to be together again, to live together.’
‘How long have you thought this?’
‘I don’t know. It’s been a gradual dawning, I suppose.’
‘A dawning of what?’
‘A realisation that I don’t want the kids to be without their father.’
‘That’s funny because for quite a few months now you were fine with it.’
‘And I . . . don’t really want to live without you either.’
‘So what should I do?’
‘I think you should move back in.’
‘But what if you change your mind again?’
‘I won’t.’
‘Should I just come and go from my own house and my own children depending on how you’re feeling about things? Should I keep a suitcase packed?’
‘I’ve earned that. I mean, I deserve that you should say that. I was going to work and doing all the work at home and with the kids. It felt like I was doing everything. I hated it. You didn’t seem to get it. You didn’t seem to hear me.’
‘You’ve never apologised, Eleanor, never even admitted you’d done anything wrong. You know, I still couldn’t explain to someone what exactly you claim I did that was so wrong that I deserved to be kicked out of my own house.’
‘Who do you want to explain it to?’ Maserov turned away but it hurt him to do this. His wife was in tears.
‘I was talking to Carla. She told me about the amazing result you got for her. I was proud of you. She said that even though you were meant to be opposed to Betga, you actually kind of worked with him.’
‘Yeah, I suppose I did.’
‘And she said you worked with someone else too.’
‘Yeah, there have been three of us working on all this.’
‘Is that . . . who you want to explain what I did to?’
‘Eleanor, for an English teacher, that’s a terrible sentence.’ Maserov wasn’t ready to talk about Jessica to Eleanor. He didn’t know what role he wanted Jessica to take in his life and he wasn’t sure Jessica knew what she wanted either. His mouth was dry and his head was spinning with exhaustion and the nervous excitement of possibilities he’d never imagined and so had never hoped for. ‘You mean to say, “Is that to whom you want to explain what I did?” Sorry to correct you but the children might be listening and we don’t want them to hear their mother setting fire to the rules of grammar.’
‘Am I too late, Stephen?’
‘No, I think they’re asleep.’
‘Stephen, I’m sorry.’ Eleanor ignored his use of humour to delay discussing anything that mattered. ‘I do owe you an apology. As time’s gone on I have trouble explaining it too. I was angry. I was lashing out. I asked you to leave because you never seemed to hear me.’
‘I did hear you. I couldn’t do anything about it without quitting my job. And we needed my salary or we’d lose the house. Still do.’
‘Can you forgive me? Will you come back? The children would be in heaven.’
‘They never wanted me to live somewhere else.’
‘Of course they never wanted you to live somewhere else. I’ve hurt them too.’ Maserov went over to the kitchen counter and poured himself a Scotch, one Acting Sergeant Ron Quinn would have approved of.
‘Stephen?’
He took a sip from the glass.
‘Stephen, what are you going to do?’
He looked at her and he didn’t know.
‘Am I too late?’ she asked. ‘Isn’t this what you’ve been wanting?’
‘Eleanor . . . It’s lucky you’re not a musician ’cause your timing is awful. Do you have any idea what’s going on for me right now . . . at work?’
‘Well, I’m kind of concerned . . . that I sort of . . . do. Am I too late? Is that what you’re saying?’
‘No.’
‘I’m not too late?’
‘No, that’s not what I’m saying.’
‘What are you saying?’
‘I’m saying that we need to talk but that I just have to . . . I am so tired. Right now I just need to sleep. Then tomorrow morning I’m going to see if I can get an appointment to see Malcolm Torrent, see if I can get him to agree to make me, a lowly Second Year, the lawyer responsible for all Torrent Industries matters at Freely Savage. Then we should talk.’ Maserov finished his drink.