Chapter IV – Anthony’s Younger Years
Anthony was about two months old the first time we took him to Wynne to visit family. Mother and I stayed at Nannaw’s house for the weekend and Daddy and Angie stayed at Granny’s. About 8:00 p.m. I decided to give Anthony a bath so he would feel nice and clean before bed and he would be able to sleep better. As I got him ready for his bath I realized Nannaw didn’t have a tub, she only had a stand up shower, so mother and I had to bathe him in her kitchen sink.
Mother and I were standing there bathing Anthony and talking away when I looked down and noticed brown stuff coming up in the water. I looked at mother, she looked at me, and at the same time we both realized Anthony had poo pooed in my grandmother’s kitchen sink. Nannaw was a very clean person and if she knew Anthony had poo pooed in her kitchen sink she would’ve been very upset with us.
Once we realized what was going on mother and I started laughing and couldn’t stop, we were laughing so hard we were crying. We knew we had to get the poo poo out of the sink before Nannaw saw it or we’d be in trouble, so I let the water out while mother found the bleach to sterilize the sink. The entire time we were cleaning the sink we couldn’t stop laughing, we were like a couple of kids with their giggle boxes turned upside down.
Once the sink was sterilized we ran more water and continued bathing him. While we were bathing Anthony Nannaw walked in the kitchen and asked us what was so funny. We both kind of snickered and said, “Oh, we were laughing at Anthony”. She just looked at us in disbelief and walked out of the room, mother and I died laughing again. To the day she died, Nannaw never learned about that incident.
When Anthony and Lauren were three months old Kim and Lauren left their home in Wynne (they lived with Kim’s parents Bobby and Judy) and moved to Jackson to live with our family. It was really neat having my older cousin live with us and watching our babies grow up together. Less than a year after Kim and Lauren moved in with us, they moved to an apartment in Ridgeland, MS. Anthony and I would visit them or they would come over and go swimming, so we still saw each other quite often.
Up until I had Anthony I was a very calm and patient person, it took a lot to make me cry, get me upset, or make me angry. After having Anthony, I guess my hormones changed because I’d cry, get upset, or get angry at the drop of a hat.
One day Anthony was in his crib pitching a fit and I couldn’t figure out what was wrong with him. He wouldn’t stop crying and was throwing his toys out of his bed onto the floor. I’d pick them up and put them back in his bed only to have him throw them on the floor again. I finally lost my patience with him. I had so much anger built up inside of me I wanted to hit him to make him shut up. I knew I couldn’t hit him so therefore I had to do something else to release the anger. My camera, which I cherished dearly, was lying on the bed beside me. In anger, I picked it up and threw it across the room. It hit the wall and broke into several pieces. Now I was really mad because I took very good care of my things and I’d allowed the anger to take over and cause me to break something that meant a lot to me. That outburst of anger scared me because I’d never done anything like that before in my life and I never wanted to do it again.
When Anthony and Lauren were about fifteen months old, Loren, the next door neighbor, brought me this bald baby bird and asked me if I knew what it was. I had no idea what it was because I’d never seen a baby bird that big before, it looked like a baby dinosaur. He told me he found it under the bridge and asked me if I’d take care of it. I’d taken care of many baby birds in the past but this bird was definitely different, it wouldn’t open its mouth to eat worms, instead it would peck on the ground. Since it wouldn’t eat like the other baby birds I’d raised I decided to give it baby formula (I had a lot of cans left over from when Anthony was a baby). I figured if a human baby could live on it then maybe this baby bird could as well. I know, crazy, right, but it worked. Several weeks later the baby bird grew feathers and that is when I learned the baby bird I’d raised was a pigeon. The pigeon was very spoiled and thought it was a human.
One day Kim and Lauren came over to visit. Lauren and Anthony were playing in the front yard sliding on their kiddy slide, Kim and I were standing around talking, and the pigeon was walking around on the ground. We were watching the kids take turns sliding down the slide when all of a sudden the pigeon got behind Anthony and in front of Lauren, hopped up the two stairs of the slide and slid down the slide. We all started laughing and the kids said, “Did you see that?!! Did you see the pigeon side down our slide?!!!” This went on several times before ending, it lasted long enough I got some of it on video tape, talk about funny.
Kim lived in her apartment for a year or so then moved to Forrest City, AR which is just outside of Wynne, in order to be closer to her family. Because Anthony and Lauren grew up together, there was a very strong bond between the two of them, which remained throughout the years and the many miles apart.
The most shocking thing that ever happened was one evening at 5:00 p.m., I got this phone call asking for Anthony, I was a little shocked because Anthony was still too young to talk, so I didn’t understand why someone was calling and asking for him. A couple of weeks before this, my mother and I had gone to the Parade of Homes in Brandon, MS and mother had entered Anthony’s name in the drawing for a trundle bed. After she placed the entry sheet with Anthony’s name on it in the box, she said, “I should’ve put Charles on the slip instead just in case Anthony won because you have to be eighteen in order to win. If he doesn’t win the trundle bed they will enter his name in the final drawing for a 1988 Ford Fiesta which would be a very nice prize.” Well the lady calling that day was calling because Anthony didn’t win the trundle bed but won the 1988 Ford Fiesta instead! I was very shocked he had won the car but because he was so young he wasn’t allowed to receive it.
The lady told me she was having a hard time giving this car away because the first person she called was in his 70’s and didn’t have a driver’s license. The second person she called was Anthony and he was too young so she was going to try her best to give it to the third person she called, we both just laughed. Before we hung up she said, “Maybe because Anthony won a car at the age of seventeen months he will be a lucky person throughout his life.” I wish that would’ve been true.
When Anthony was eighteen months old he was playing in my parent’s closet and got his finger pinched in a wooden clothes hanger. His finger turned red and swelled up a little bit but not anything to worry about.
A couple of days later we went to Atlanta, GA to Aunt Callie’s, my father’s sister, funeral. While we were at her house Anthony and Matt, Callie’s grandson, were riding battery powered 4-wheelers around the room. While Anthony was driving, he turned a little too close to the coffee table and smashed that same finger between the glass of the coffee table and the handle bar of the 4-wheeler. That night Anthony cried all night long because his finger was hurting him.
When we got back home the next day, I took Anthony to the doctor because his finger was red and had a blister on it. The doctor looked at his finger and told me it would be fine but a couple of days later the blister was green and there was a red streak going up his hand. I knew this meant he may have blood poison so I took him to a different doctor. She took one look at his finger and immediately admitted him to River Oaks Hospital in town. She told me Anthony was lucky he didn’t lose his finger and she couldn’t understand why the first doctor didn’t give him any antibiotics for it.
The hospital wing Anthony was staying in was in the process of being remodeled so therefore there weren’t many people on the floor. Anthony was the only child in that wing so he was the center of attention with the nurses. They would come to our room every chance they could. When they were slow, the nurses would come to our room, get Anthony, put him in a wagon and pull him around the halls, this kept him entertained and he loved it.
One day the medevac was doing a test landing at River Oaks, so two of the nurses came running in our room to get Anthony so he could watch the helicopter land. That just made his day.
Our third day in the hospital the doctor came around and told me she was releasing Anthony in a few hours. She again told me Anthony was lucky to have a mother like me because I saved his finger by taking immediate action when I noticed his finger was green and there was a red streak running up his hand. Even though he was being released from the hospital, Anthony’s finger wasn’t completely healed so they put him on antibiotics to make sure the rest of the infection was gone.
As a young child, Anthony had the most beautiful black curly hair I’ve ever seen in my life, I just loved it. One weekend, Anthony was about two, mother and I were in the kitchen visiting and we noticed it was very quiet in the house. Well if you are a parent you know this isn’t a good thing because it usually means your child is into something they shouldn’t be.
Mother and I started walking through the house to see where Anthony was and when we found him he was in my parent’s bathroom floor sitting in a pile of black hair. When he looked up there was a huge gap in his bangs, my heart sank when I saw he’d cut his hair, I was just sick. When mother asked him what happened to his hair he gave us the following story: “Mimi I didn’t do it, I promise. Little Bit jumped up on the bed, took the scissors off the bed and cut my hair.” Really!!! Did he really just tell us that story and think we were going to believe it?!!! First of all, Little Bit was my mother’s twelve year old Chihuahua and we all know a dog can’t cut hair. Secondly my parent’s had a waterbed with 6 drawers on each side of it and Little Bit couldn’t get on the bed unless you picked her up and put her on there. When we pointed these things out to Anthony he said, “Really Mimi, really she did, Little Bit cut my hair, I promise.” That was the beginning of many lies to come, how sad.
Around that same time in Anthony’s life I would drive back and forth to Wynne a lot because I was dating a guy named John who lived next door to Granny. This was a four hour drive so we would leave Jackson Saturday morning, get there on Saturday afternoon, spend the night at Granny’s house and leave on Sunday afternoon.
One weekend Anthony and I went to Wynne to visit John but we stayed in a hotel for the night because I didn’t want anyone knowing I was there. After we left John’s house, I drove back to the hotel, bathed Anthony, and put him in bed. I locked and chained the door so Anthony couldn’t get out and I got in the shower. When I got out of the shower I noticed the front door was wide open. Anthony had pulled a chair up to the door, unlocked both locks and gone outside. I panicked at first because I didn’t know where he was or if he was okay. When I found him he was just outside the door, I became furious with him for going outside because we were on the second floor and he could’ve fallen over the rail. I put him in the bed and he pulled the covers up over his head and started laughing which made me even madder.
I remember looking at him lying there under the covers laughing and the anger dwelling up inside of me. For whatever reason I snapped and hit the bottom of his nose very hard with the palm of my hand, he started crying. When he pulled the covers back and raised up, blood was pouring from his nose, I panicked at that very moment because I didn’t know what to do, plus I had hurt my son. I called John because his mother was a nurse and she told me to tilt his head back and put a wash cloth under his nose in order to stop the bleeding. I felt so bad for what I had done, I held Anthony in my arms and rocked and rocked him until we both settled down enough to go to sleep.
The next day when I picked Anthony up from the babysitter’s house, she told me for some unknown reason, during his nap time, Anthony’s nose started bleeding and it bled quite a bit. I acted like I had no idea what could’ve caused this but deep down inside I knew exactly what caused it. Up until now I’ve never told anyone this story, to this day I haven’t forgotten how that made me feel and how ashamed I was for doing it.
On one of my trips to Wynne, I noticed a trucker keep flashing his lights at me but I wasn’t sure why. He’d get right up on my bumper flashing his lights over and over, so finally I pulled over at a rest area without restrooms to see what he wanted. It was a little scary because we were the only two vehicles there, anything could’ve happened to Anthony and me and no one would’ve known.
The trucker got out of his truck, walked behind my car, pushed down on my trunk, and then walked around to my window. I rolled my window down to see what he wanted. He told me he thought he saw smoke coming from my tail pipe and my car might be on fire. He then told me he was mistaken because everything looked fine. I thanked him for his concern then he turned around and headed back to his truck.
As he started to walk off, he turned back around and came back to my window. At this time I realized something wasn’t right about this entire situation, so I had my guard up when he came back. He leaned down, looked in my car and saw Anthony sitting in his car seat. You could tell he was thinking about something but it seemed like Anthony had ruined his plans. Then he asked me if I’d like to meet him in Water Valley to have a cup of coffee. I told him thank you but I wouldn’t be able to because I was headed to Wynne to my grandmother’s house. I noticed he was still thinking about something but I was still unsure of what he wanted. I was getting more and more nervous but I wasn’t about to let my nervousness show. He told me surely I could take a few minutes to have a cup of coffee with him, they wouldn’t mind me being a little late. I told him I was already running late and they were going to be worried about me as it was (again, this was before cell phones). What I didn’t tell him was no one knew I was coming to Wynne. I was going to surprise Granny.
He looked in the car again, shook his head, walked back to his truck, and we both pulled off. We got just a little ways down the interstate when he started flashing his lights at me again, so I sped up to get away from him. When I looked up, I noticed he was still right behind me flashing his lights. I sped up again, by this time I was doing ninety and he was still right on my behind flashing his lights. Finally he slowed down and I was able to get a pretty good distance in front of him. When I got to the Water Valley exit, he flew up behind me again, flashing his lights. I started to panic at this time but thank goodness he exited at the Water Valley exit and I drove on to Wynne, shaken up but safe.
That same trip we went to West Memphis. Since Aunt Georgia was divorced, a lot of times Anthony and I would drive to West Memphis to spend the weekend with her and Nick. While we were there, Nick asked me if he and Doug (his best friend) could take Anthony, to the Memphis Zoo for the day, needless to say I told him, “Yes.” What mother doesn’t want a break from their child every now and then? Before they left, I gave Nick a list of things not to give Anthony because they’d make him hyper (sugar and caffeine were the two main things) and I didn’t want to have to deal with Anthony being hyper when he got home. Did Nick listen to me? No.
When they got back from the zoo Nick had so many stories to tell. He told me as soon as they walked in the zoo there were gift shops everywhere and Anthony was mesmerized by all the colors of the balloons and stuffed animals in the gift shops, however that didn’t last very long because Anthony noticed the animals.
Next they went to the Koi pond which had a bridge over it. Anthony lay down on the bridge looking through the cracks in the boards because he wanted to see the fish. According to Nick, they were there for about thirty minutes because the pond had about thirty Koi in it and Anthony wanted to see each and every one of them.
After Anthony finally got finished looking at the Koi they went to the big cat area where the tigers and lions were. It was close to feeding time so the lions were roaring rather loudly but instead of being afraid of the lion’s roar, Anthony was fascinated by it. Nick said they stuck around so Anthony could see the big cats being fed, he just loved it.
Next they went to watch the sea lions. Nick said there was a metal fence around the sea lions and behind that metal fence was a second fence. Luckily for Anthony there was a second fence. Before Nick knew it, Anthony had walked through the first fence trying to get in the pool to go swimming with the sea lions. Thank goodness for the second fence stopping Anthony or he would’ve drowned if he’d managed to get to the water.
One of the things Anthony got to see at the zoo was a mother hippo and her twin babies that had just been born, how cool would that be.
Nick also said Anthony wanted to know the names of each of the animals so Nick would tell him the name and Anthony would try to repeat it. The two words that Anthony had the most trouble with were elephant and giraffe.
Next they went to the petting zoo where Anthony had to pet everything in there, I’m sure Anthony was not the only person that had to pet every animal in the petting zoo. Don’t think for one minute Nick wasn’t in there petting them as well. While in there, they saw a cow with a purple tongue which Anthony just insisted on taking home with him but Nick and Doug wouldn’t let him, how mean.
From the petting zoo you could see the train which Anthony wanted to ride once he saw it. Before they left to go to the zoo I explained to Nick Anthony would tell him he wanted to ride the train but once it came time to get on the train he’d back out. Needless to say, Nick didn’t listen to me about that either, but he’d been warned. Nick said they bought tickets for the train, and stood in line. But when it came time to get on the train Anthony grabbed him and told him he didn’t want to ride the train because he was scared. Nick told Anthony to look at all the other kids on the train and what a good time they were having. He then told Anthony if he got on the train but didn’t like it and wanted to get off they would. You and I both know that wasn’t true but it worked, Anthony got on the train. Nick said Anthony had his arms wrapped so tight around Nick’s neck he couldn’t breathe. He also had his legs wrapped around Nick’s waist clinging on for dear life, he was petrified. Nick said the train hadn’t moved ten feet when Anthony turned around in his seat, put his arms up in the air and was laughing because he enjoyed the ride so much. Once it was over, they had to ride the train three more times, along with all the other rides at the zoo.
Once they got finished riding all the rides, Nick noticed the camel ride, you know they had to ride the camel. The camel had two humps so when they put Anthony on the camel they put him between the two humps. Nick said Anthony kept poking very hard on the hump in front of him trying to get it to go down but it wouldn’t so he turned around to Nick and said, “What is this?” Nick said, “It’s the camel’s hump.” Then Anthony looked at him again and said, “I know but what is it?” Nick got tickled and told him to quit poking the camel’s hump because he was afraid the camel was going to turn around and bite them.
Their day was coming to an end and Anthony was getting tired because he’d walked the entire zoo by himself refusing to be carried. On their way home, they stopped by the gift shop and bought Anthony a balloon as a souvenir and headed home. As they got to the gate, they walked past a police officer and just as they got beside him Nick asked Anthony if he was hungry, he said, “Yes”. Then Nick asked him what he wanted to eat and Anthony told him, “Cat food”. Nick was scared to death of what the police officer might do because he was afraid he might think they were abusing Anthony, but the police officer just started laughing.
Anthony hung on to that helium until he got back to the house. Aunt Georgia was out when they came in and when she got home she opened the door and turned on the ceiling fan in about the same movement. In a chorus she heard, “Don't turn on the ceiling fan!!” The balloon had made it to the vaulted ceiling and was hanging out by the ceiling fan and when she turned it on you can guess the end of the story. Anthony was a big boy about it and we eventually got it down.”
I am so glad Nick and Doug took Anthony to the zoo that day because that is one of Nick’s most favorite stories to tell and I love hearing it as much as he loves telling it.
Remember I told you about the trucker telling me he thought my car was on fire? Well a week later, mother was reading an article to me from the local newspaper about a girl that had been raped by a truck driver. She proceeded to tell me how he was flashing his lights at her and when she pulled over he told her that her car was on fire. When she got out to check her car he grabbed her and raped her, chills went up my spine. Up until that moment I hadn’t told my mother about the incident I had the week before. I truly believe having a toddler in the car with me messed up his plans which kept me from being raped and possibly saved my life.
Another one of Nick’s favorite stories is when Anthony was around that same age. Aunt Georgia, Nick, Mother, Anthony and I went to Florida to the beach. Nick would take Anthony out in the water on a raft and let him ride the waves in. Even though Anthony wore floaties, Nick held his hand the entire time so he wouldn’t float away. Each time a wave came along Anthony would laugh so hard and so loud that by the end of the day he lost his voice (there is nothing sweeter than the sound of a child laughing).
Later that afternoon, after we’d all gone inside to take a shower and clean up, Nick, Anthony and I decided to take an afternoon walk along the beach. Because Anthony wanted to, I let him walk on the side closest to the water, but I made sure we were far enough away from the water that the waves wouldn’t splash him. All of a sudden, out of nowhere, this huge wave came up and completely engulfed Anthony. I was already holding his hand as we were walking but at that moment I grabbed it real tight so he wouldn’t get pulled back out in the water. Once the wave was gone, this poor drenched little boy looked up at me with these very sad eyes as if to say, “What happened?” Nick and I doubled over laughing so hard we couldn’t quit, poor Anthony didn’t have a clue what was so funny and he wasn’t happy because he was soaking wet.
On another one of my many trips to Wynne, while Anthony and I were visiting Nannaw, I was trying to clean his ears but he kept jumping up and down so I couldn’t get the Q-tip in his ear to clean them. Finally I’d had enough and I just jabbed the Q-tip in his ear, he started yelling, jumping up and down, and screaming it hurt. I had no sympathy for him because I kept on asking him to be still and he wouldn’t. All the noise got Nannaw’s attention and she came in the room asking me what happened. I told her Anthony wouldn’t be still and because of his jumping around he pushed the Q-tip in his ear. I don’t think she believed me because she asked me if I’d jabbed the Q-tip in his ear. I stuck to my story and told her, “No, his jumping pushed it in his ear.” I still don’t think she believed me because she fussed at me and told me I may have damaged his hearing and I should never do that to him again.
On one of our trips we had left Aunt Georgia’s house in West Memphis and were driving to Wynne. Anthony was sitting in the back seat quiet as a mouse when all of a sudden I heard this strange sound. I turned around to see him sitting in throw up. He didn’t say a word and had thrown up his breakfast eggs all over himself. I had no way of cleaning him up so he had to ride the rest of the way to Nannaw’s house in his own throw up. That was a very unpleasant trip.
Just before Anthony’s third birthday, I took him to Newport to meet Tommy, his biological father. I’d gotten his address from a friend of mine and he had no idea we were coming. I thought if Anthony’s father was in his life things would be different for him and he might settle down some. Not only that but I was tired of raising Anthony alone and having someone in my life to help me deal with him would’ve been nice. I walked up to Tommy’s door and knocked on it but no one answered. Just as we turned to walk away, Tommy walked around the side of the house. He recognized me immediately but I had no idea who he was at first because his hair was down past his shoulders and looked like it hadn’t been brushed in weeks. I was beginning to think this was a bad idea because I didn’t want Anthony seeing his father looking like that. Tommy asked me what I was doing there so I stepped aside so he could see Anthony. I told him that was his son and I wanted him to be able to meet his father.
Tommy invited us to come in his house so we could talk. He told me he had married a girl from Swifton named Kim, they had been married for three years, and they were having problems. He also told me he had a son named Chris that was exactly to the day seven months younger than Anthony. I guess he didn’t waste any time getting another girl pregnant after he left me. Anyway, that afternoon Kim was at work and Chris and Anthony were outside playing ball so Tommy and I spent the afternoon together catching up.
During our conversation, Tommy told me he wished he’d never left me and he wanted to try to work things out. He told me he would move to Mississippi, we could buy a house and if anything needed to be repaired he’d fix it. As I mentioned before, I was tired of raising Anthony alone so I fell in love with this idea.
I told Tommy Anthony’s third birthday was in three weeks at Chuck E. Cheese and asked him if he’d like to come. He promised me he’d be there but he never showed up. This was a disappointment to Anthony because he heard his father tell me he would be there and he was very excited about getting to see him. However, Anthony quickly forgot Tommy wasn’t there once his friends and family arrived and he started having a great time.
When Anthony was very young Mimi and Charlie would take him to the deer camp. One afternoon, Anthony, Charlie and Mimi were on the 3-wheeler while most of their friends were on the porch enjoying the beautiful weather. Because Anthony was so young he was in the front, Mimi was in the middle and Charlie was on the back. Even though Charlie was in the back, he had his hand on the gas in order to make the 4-wheeler go but Anthony was steering it. Somehow Anthony managed to hit a bump in the dirt. The next thing they knew Anthony’s hand went up and came down hitting Charlie’s hand which in turn hit the gas. The 3-wheeler rose up, Anthony jumped off and ran away while Charlie and Mimi were left on the 3-wheeler. Charlie slid off the back end of the 3-wheeler hitting the dirt first and Mimi fell on top of him. All of their friends on the porch couldn’t stop laughing and they all talked about that day for years to come.
When Anthony was very young Charlie got him a pop gun. One day Charlie, Anthony and Mimi were riding the 3-wheeler through the woods when they came upon a herd of about six deer that crossed in front of them. Charlie let Anthony off of the 3-wheeler to get a closer view of the deer. Anthony spooked the deer and as they ran off he yelled, “Stop I want to shoot you!” He would then shoot his pop gun, stop and pick up the ball he just shot, reload it in his gun, and take off again yelling, “Stop I want to shoot you!”
As I have mentioned several times before, Anthony was a rowdy child and one night when I came home from work, Mother and Angie met me at the door with a story to tell. It seems while Mother and Angie were in the kitchen visiting, Anthony was outside getting in Angie’s car (our driveway was a very steep driveway which none of us liked because it was hard to get in and out of your car without the car door shutting on you). Mother looked out of the kitchen window just in time to see Angie’s car rolling backwards down the driveway, across the street, jump the neighbor’s curb, go across their front yard, and miss their house by inches. It was so close to the house you literally couldn’t walk between the car and the house. Mother ran to the car and Anthony was standing up in the front seat holding on to the steering wheel, eyes wide open. When Mother opened the car door Anthony said, “Mimi please don’t spank me I will never do it again I promise. Please don’t spank me.” Mother didn’t spank him because she was glad he wasn’t hurt.
Just minutes before that happened the street had been filled with children who’d gone inside to cool off for a few minutes, but as soon as they saw Angie’s car in Mrs. Cathy’s yard they all came out again. God was looking out for a lot of children that day.
One of my favorite stories about Anthony is the day my father was watching him and he was supposed to be taking a nap. When I drove up from work, I noticed the garage door was open and Anthony was standing in the garage tinkering with my father’s tools. When I got out of the car I asked Anthony where Charlie was, he put his finger over his mouth and said, “Shhhh Charlie is sleeping.” He then proceeded to lead me into the living room where I saw my father lying on the floor asleep. While we were standing there my father woke up and I started laughing at him. He said, “What? What is so funny?” I said, “When I drove up Anthony was outside by himself in the garage and I asked him where you were. He put his finger over his mouth and said, ‘Shhh Charlie is sleeping’ then he led me in here where I found you asleep on the floor.” Charlie chuckled and said, “You little shit you. I lay down with him to get him to take a nap and I guess I’m the one that fell asleep instead.” We both just laughed, Anthony didn’t understand what was so funny.
From the time Anthony was born until he turned three, we lived in my parent’s house and we had a lot of fond memories there. As I mentioned earlier, before I got pregnant I was ready to move out on my own and now the time had come for Anthony and me to get our own place.