Jane waltzed into the office and flung her coat on the stand. Her handbag went scooting under the desk as she swirled round to open the cabinets where her work was. Scooping up the files she moved to her desk. As she settled herself down in her chair she saw Fiona standing in the office doorway, staring at her.
‘What?’
Fiona moved quickly to Jane’s desk. ‘What’s up with you today?’
‘Nothing. Why?’
Fiona looked at her closely. ‘Oh yes, I see it now. It’s that bloke isn’t it? You weren’t alone last night.’
Jane blushed. ‘That is none of your business, thank you.’
Fiona grinned and planted herself on the side of Jane’s desk. ‘At least tell me his name.’
‘It’s Mark, and don’t you dare read anything into this.’
‘Would I do such a thing? So when’s the wedding?’
‘Fiona!’
‘Okay, but if I’m to keep the rumours under control I want a little more info in return.’
‘That’s blackmail.’
‘No, prudent negotiation for communication exchange.’
Jane chuckled to herself. Her secretary definitely had a way with words. She pulled her face into a serious expression and tried to give Fiona a stern glare.
Fiona edged away. ‘Hmm, up to you, but don’t blame me if you suddenly get congratulated on becoming pregnant.’
‘Okay, wait!’ Jane knew poor Fiona had been fending off enquiries for the past few weeks and had got nothing in return for her efforts.
Fiona grinned and got out her note pad.
‘You can put that away for a start.’
‘It’s just for cover, in case someone comes in.’
Jane raised her eyebrows slightly.
‘So who is he? Where’s he from? Who are his parents?’
Jane went to speak but stopped. Her puzzlement must have showed on her face.
‘Oh, don’t tell me you’ve been blind dating him?’
‘No, not exactly. His name is Mark Haywood and he’s a locksmith.’ She paused, hoping that would be enough but Fiona just stared at her in expectation.
‘He’s been married and has two children.’
Fiona nearly fell off the desk. ‘No way!’
Jane just looked at her.
‘Hell, you don’t do things easily, do you? Couldn’t just get a single bloke, you had to get yourself a ready made family.’
‘It wasn’t intentional, so give me a break.’
‘And how often does he see his kids?’
‘He doesn’t anymore.’
‘Why? What did he do? Or doesn’t he want anything to do with them?’ Fiona looked at her seriously.
‘He didn’t do anything and he loves his kids. I actually don’t know why he stopped seeing them, maybe they live off the island.’
Fiona slipped off the desk and stood with her arms folded across her chest. ‘I can see I need to teach you how to communicate with men.’
Jane went to speak, but Fiona stopped her. ‘Not your usual work communication, you are well versed in that. Specifically I mean finding out the basic need to know stuff when you are on a date.’
Jane laughed. ‘Get out of here before I find you some horrible job to do.’
Fiona strolled to the door and turned back. ‘Better be nice to me now. Remember I am in charge of gossip control.’
Jane shook her head despairingly and turned to the work on her desk.
* * *
It was Tuesday evening and Jane had prepared the lounge for Mark’s crystal meditation. He needed to complete it before Jasmine’s next meeting, which was the next day. She glanced at her watch. He was late, which was unusual, and she wondered whether he would chicken out of doing it. The doorbell rang and Jane opened the door to find an ashen-faced Mark.
‘You look rough,’ she said as he walked past her.
‘I’ve just found out my mother’s ill,’ he said.
‘Oh Mark, I’m so sorry. Is it bad?’ Jane watched him collapse on the sofa.
‘I don’t know, but she’s in hospital.’
‘Can’t you go and visit her? You’ll feel better if you see her.’
‘Why?’
‘I just can’t, all right?’
Jane felt his frustration and annoyance. ‘Is she in hospital abroad? I can loan you some money if you need it.’
Mark shook his head. ‘Thanks for the offer, but I’m fine for money.’
‘Then what is preventing you from going to see your mother?’
He looked at her. ‘I… I…’ Then he shook his head sadly. ‘I… I can’t explain it at the moment, I’m sorry.’
Jane sat down next to him and took his hand. ‘Well, when you’re ready, I’ll be here.’
He nodded appreciatively.
‘Do you still want to do the meditation? I’m sure Jasmine won’t mind if you don’t, given the circumstances.’
He squeezed her hand. ‘I made you a promise and I intend to keep it. Let’s do it, shall we?’
Jane put the CD in the player and made him comfortable as he lay down on the sofa. She watched as he took his crystal from its bag and held it in his hand. He closed his eyes and began to breathe deeply. As Jane watched she hoped and prayed that his meditation would be a good one.
Mark found himself sitting in a green field at the base of a mountain. The sun was shining high above him, sending warmth into his body. He closed his eyes and bathed in its rays; feeling the sun’s energy penetrating his skin and flowing through his muscles to the bone beneath. The more he breathed in the stronger the energy became until at one point he thought he was levitating.
‘Hello Mark, I am glad you came back.’
Mark opened his eyes, recognising the voice of the Mayan priest who was his guide. The priest looked exactly the same as before, dressed in cotton pants with a poncho top, and Mark felt a little apprehensive as he remembered his words to the guide at the end of the last meditation. His disbelief hadn’t gone, only diminished a bit, so he decided to confront the priest with his suspicions.
‘Your input in Jane’s meditation was a clever move. How did you manage it? Or should I believe Jane did know about your tattoo and has tricked me into coming here?’
Kukulcan shook his head and sat down next to him. ‘You know the truth, Mark. Look deep inside and you will know.’
‘I don’t understand what you are getting at. How can I know the answer when I’m the one asking the question?’
‘Think about your question and then tell me what is the first thing that comes into your mind.’
Mark thought carefully. “Did Jane already know about the tattoo?” Immediately his mind said “No.”
Mark looked at the priest. ‘The answer is no. But I may only be saying that because I don’t want to believe she would lie to me.’
Kukulcan said, ‘But what does your mind say about that question?’
Mark didn’t know where this was going, but he went along with it. He thought about his comment “Am I saying no because I don’t want to believe Jane would lie to me?” He looked up amazed. ‘My mind said, no. It doesn’t accept that explanation. But how can that be when it was me who had the thought in the first place?’
‘Let go of logic for a moment Mark, think about this question. Why do you think you answered no to your own doubts about Jane?’
His reply came immediately. ‘Because I believe… no, believe isn’t the word. I know she wouldn’t lie to me.’
‘And how do you know this, Mark?’
‘I don’t know,’ Mark said gruffly.
‘Then tell me how you felt when your mind told you this.’
‘Good. Pleased, even. But am I deceiving myself?’
Kukulcan laughed. ‘Your mind is incredibly good at weaving a story but it cannot deceive your physical self. Your body accepts the truth easily and this truth comes from your higher self.’
‘Look, I don’t understand what you are getting at with this ‘higher self ’ stuff. As far as I am concerned all this is happening in my head and I could be just saying anything to make myself feel happier because I like Jane.’
‘Remember your last meditation. It was a new experience for you and you didn’t want to believe what you were shown. I have a question for you now, and you must give me the answer that comes immediately to your mind.’
‘Fire away.’
‘Why have you come back?’
Mark stared at him in shock. ‘I... well…’
‘Straight answer from your mind, Mark.’
‘That is not what came into your head first, was it?’
Mark reluctantly shook his head. ‘I came back because I didn’t believe what you showed me last time and I want to understand why.’
‘Can you remember how you felt in the last meditation?’
Mark looked at him, worried. ‘Do I have to?’
Kukulcan nodded.
Mark took a deep breath. ‘What do you want me to remember?’
‘Remember how you felt when you didn’t believe what I was showing you?’
‘I was upset and angry.’ Mark said.
‘Now, think about accepting I was showing you the truth. How do you feel?’
‘I feel relieved and strangely calm, but also a bit of an idiot because I didn’t see it before, or even as it was happening.’
The priest put his hand on Mark’s shoulder. ‘You are feeling better because you have listened to your higher self. Yes, it can sometimes be painful, but your body accepts the truth better than it accepts lies and because of this you must learn to acknowledge your feelings. Your higher self will always tell you the truth if you listen to it.’
‘So if I ask my higher self whether my mother will be alright it will answer truthfully?’
The priest smiled. ‘Try it, and why don’t you ask why she got ill?’
Mark looked at him. ‘It will tell me that too?’
Mark still had his doubts but he immediately asked the question in his mind. “Is my mother going to be alright?” The answer came back instantly “Yes.” Mark thought about the second part of the question with a little bit of apprehension. “Why did my mother become ill?” His mind replied, “To get you to go back.”
Mark turned to the priest. ‘She wouldn’t make herself ill to get me to go back. She just wouldn’t.’
‘Then what other explanation could there be?’
Mark’s eyes widened as he registered his thoughts. ‘My mother was made ill to get me to go back. Is that the true answer?’
Kukulcan smiled. ‘You already know the answer to that question, don’t you?’
Mark’s instant thought was “yes”. He dropped his head into his hands, shaking it in disbelief. Anger was building up inside of him. ‘The bastards!’ He cried.
The priest squeezed his shoulder. ‘When you next speak to your father tell him to get an independent doctor to have a look at her. Things will then become right.’
Mark looked up. ‘I can’t believe my mother would be used this way. Are you saying I should belief this?’
Kukulcan raised an eyebrow at him and Mark said, ‘I know, I know. Belief is not required, only an open mind. But if I should trust my higher self thoughts, how come sometimes my mind refuses to accept those thoughts?’
‘That can be your subconscious and it has its purpose, but all too easily it can be programmed with a belief that resists the truth from your higher self. Life events impact on you and create these beliefs. You must be aware of this and act only when you feel it is right.’
‘So only act after I have asked the question, listened to my higher self’s answer and felt it in my body.’
Kukulcan stood up. ‘You have grasped the lesson well. Now we must move on.’
Mark got up and looked up at the mountain behind him. ‘The next thing you’re going to say is I have to climb that mountain.’
He saw the priest smile and reply. ‘It’s a volcano and you need to go into it.’
Mark took a deep breath, straightened his body and said, ‘then let’s do it.’
The climb to the rim at the top was fairly easy and Mark was now looking into the massive crater, where molten lava swirled and bubbled. In the centre of the lava was a massive orange and red crystal.
‘You need to climb down and enter the crystal, for it has something to give you.’
Mark looked down into the pit of hot rock and felt his stomach churn. ‘How will I not get burned to death?’
‘You must trust you will be safe. Here, take this.’ Kukulcan gave Mark a silver candle with a blue flame. ‘Its light will protect you. But you must believe or the flame will go out.’
Mark took the candle, watching how, for a moment, the flame flickered erratically before settling down. Conscious that Kukulcan was watching him, he slipped over the edge of the rim and slowly made his way down to the bottom. The closer he got to the hot lava the hotter it should have become, but he felt no dryness in the air he was breathing or burning on his skin. It was as if he was in a cool bubble protecting and shielding him from the conditions inside the volcano.
Just a few feet above the lava he found a ledge, and stood for a moment looking across the hot molten rock to the beautiful pulsating orange red crystal in the centre. How on earth was he going to get across? There was no bridge to the crystal, and it was too far to leap.
‘You must go into the crystal, Mark. You must walk across.’ The priest’s words pierced the air around him.
Mark looked up at Kukulcan as if he was mad. How the hell was he going to walk across? It was madness. At that moment Mark felt a searing hot flash touch his right arm and the skin turn deep red as the sleeve of his shirt burnt away. He stared at it in shock noticing how hot and dry the air had become.
Quickly he looked at the candle he was holding in his left hand and saw that the blue flame was nearly out. ‘I believe, I believe,’ he told himself forcibly as the burning on his arm worsened and the bottoms of his trousers burst into flame. ‘I believe, I believe,’ he shouted out in panic, but still the flames rose up his trouser legs, searing the skin beneath.
‘Actions Mark, not words,’ Kukulcan yelled down to him.
Mark stared out towards the crystal as he began to register pain in his body. All he could hear was his inner voice screaming at him to turn back, to get away from the lava before the fire consumed him. Everything he had ever learnt to survive in life was telling him this was suicide. But what did his higher self have to say?
Mark took a step forward into the lava.
A cool, light wind swirled around him, extinguishing the flames and lifting him above the molten rock. It cocooned him from the noise and activity happening in the volcano. For a moment he hovered, and then he was being carried across towards the crystal.
Mark breathed a sigh of relief as all pain disappeared and his skin miraculously returned to normal. That was the biggest and scariest step he had ever taken in his life.
The wind twisted and turned him like a discarded bird’s feather, lifting him upwards until he was just above the top of the crystal. He looked down at the strange but beautiful sight below him. The bursting spray of lava bouncing off the sides of the crystal seemed to send red and orange reflections through the crystal structure. It looked as though the crystal itself was on fire.
As quickly as it had come the wind diminished, leaving him to gently slip down on to the top of the crystal. He stood for a moment not sure what he should do to get inside. As he searched for some sort of opening, his inner voice said, “Why are you believing in such nonsense?” Out of the corner of his eye he saw the blue flame on the silver candle in his hand quiver. His mouth went suddenly dry as fear returned to him. Quickly he said to himself, ‘I believe because I think there is something important I must know here.’
The flame gently settled again and that was when Mark felt it, a deep vibration coming up from the crystal itself, up through his feet and into his body. As the vibration reached his head the crystal top dissolved and he slowly began his descent inside.
Beautiful colours of red, orange and crimson like that of a flame from a fire swirled and mixed together around him; intensifying in colour the deeper he went into the crystal. The lower he travelled the more vivid and thick they became until he reached the bottom, where they exploded in sprays of coloured stardust. As Mark waited for the dust to settle he sensed something coming down towards him. He looked up and saw a red, winged serpent gracefully circling the inside of the crystal walls.
Unconsciously he gripped his right hand into a fist and tightened his hold on the candle, ready to defend himself.
The creature had its eyes fixed upon him, as though it was sizing up the best way to make its approach. There was no way of escaping and Mark waited, preparing himself to take action on whatever the creature was going to do next. A thought appeared in his mind reminding him that he was here to receive something, and he relaxed.
The serpent landed next to him, settled its wings along its back before lifting its head and looking directly at him.
It said quietly, ‘Your work is not finished.’
Mark was taken aback for a moment. He should have been confused but he knew exactly what work it was referring to. He shook his head. ‘It’s too dangerous to continue with it.’
‘Whilst the human world is not ready yet, what you will produce will be needed soon.’
Mark looked at the serpent inquisitively. ‘When? How will it be used?
‘You will know when the time comes. You must be ready to act.’
‘But I can’t go back.’ Mark thought about the complications and risks to his family and friends if he returned home. ‘Once created, it will be taken from me.’
The serpent’s eyes blinked. ‘You don’t have to go back, you can continue your research elsewhere, you know that.’
Mark realised that he had been trying to make an excuse for not doing it. The serpent was right, he could do his research from anywhere. ‘So this is my life purpose?’
Mark had been aware of it since his chat with Jasmine but he hadn’t really wanted to accept it. Excitement and an awful sense of dread were building up inside of him. ‘But once done, once released, what will happen then?’
The serpent flexed its wings and its tongue tasted the air. ‘It can only go two ways. Let us hope it is the right one.’
‘And what about him? He won’t stop till he has it.’
The serpent’s eyes flashed. ‘When you release it, he will have your location. Jane will help you, but eventually you will need to deal with him on your own.’
Mark could hardly speak, his mouth had gone so dry. ‘What will happen when I confront him?’
The serpent shook its head. ‘Only you will decide that.’ It raised one of its clawed feet and offered Mark a clear crystal pyramid. ‘This will help you when that time comes.’
Mark took the pyramid. It shone brightly and was made up of many crystal points all pointing upwards. In the centre an image of a mountain peak could be seen. Mark knew this image was an important message.
The serpent spread its wings and began to rise upwards. ‘Remember your purpose, Mark, it is important you carry it through. If you fail it will have an impact on everyone.’
Mark watched the serpent mix with the swirling colours until its shape had disappeared. He looked down at the pyramid crystal. How was he going to explain this part to Jane? He didn’t want to lie to her, but she would ask all the questions he was not ready to give answers to. Would she understand and believe in him enough to help him without these answers?
The crystal around him began to dissolve except for the piece beneath his feet, which started to rise upwards towards the top of the volcano. As it reached the top Mark leapt off and landed safely on the edge of the volcano rim. Kukulcan was waiting for him.
‘You have found your purpose but have a problem,’ the priest said.
Mark sighed. ‘I don’t know what to say to Jane. How can I explain this to her?’ They walked down the outside of the volcano to the grass field below in silence.
‘What does your higher self think?’ Kukulcan asked when they reached the bottom.
Mark thought about it and asked the question in his mind. ‘I need to tell her soon but not just yet. It believes Jane will go on faith until I am ready to tell her.’
They had reached the place where Mark had been sitting.
‘And what about you, Mark? Will you go on faith for what you have heard?’
‘Part of me is still doubtful, but it is wavering a bit. I’ve been running away from my past and my work for too long. If I am to believe my feelings and senses then they are telling me my work is important and I need to get back to it. So perhaps if I keep an open mind on my feelings then faith will come.’
Kukulcan smiled and shook Mark’s hand. ‘You are getting there, well done. I will see you on your solo journey.’
‘The well?’ Mark said cautiously.
‘This is a major thing you must deal with. Do not be afraid, Mark. It will give you peace in the end.’
‘Can you not just tell me?’
‘Unfortunately telling does not have the same effect as experience. Your experience needs to release you. All will become clear when you do it. Goodbye, Mark.’
Mark opened his eyes and took a few minutes to focus before looking across to Jane, sitting on a chair beside the sofa.
Jane had been watching Mark’s face and body throughout the meditation. She saw his eyes open and asked excitedly, ‘How was it?’
Mark sat up and took the glass of water she offered him.
‘You just had this amazed look on your face all through the meditation,’ she blurted out as he drank.
Mark smiled. ‘It was great, much better than last time. The colours in the crystal in the volcano were so vivid.’
‘Volcano? You went into a volcano?’
‘And nearly got burnt to a crisp,’ Mark said. ‘I tell you, it was an experience I won’t be forgetting.’
Jane clasped her hands together in excitement, she didn’t push him for the details for those would come later, what she really wanted to know was what his gift had been. ‘And what did you get from the crystal?’
‘A crystal pyramid.’
‘Oh, much easier than mine to get in reality. You didn’t make it up by any chance did you?’
Mark looked at her indignantly.
‘Sorry, only teasing,’ she said smiling back at him.
‘And guess what I found out?’
Jane looked at him, puzzled, and then her eyes widened. ‘Your purpose. Oh tell me, tell me.’
Mark hesitated. ‘I have to continue my work.’
‘What? Being a locksmith?’ Jane looked at him, disappointed.
He shook his head. ‘No, some research work I was doing in the past.’
‘What kind of research?
‘I can’t tell you, not just yet.’
Jane felt a little annoyed. ‘Then how am I supposed to help you with your life purpose, if I don’t know what it is?’
‘I need you to believe in me, to go on faith, Jane. For a little while, anyway.’
Immediately she knew this was another test. Could she do it? Could she trust Mark enough to accept what he was telling her without knowing all the details? What had she got to lose?
Mark tilted his head as he looked at her. ‘Can you do that, Jane?’
Jane pondered, using her forefinger to gently tap her lips. Then she said, grinning, ‘Well, I just might, but I’m afraid it’s going to cost you.’
Mark laughed, pulling her across on to the sofa next to him. His lips brushed hers and just before he kissed her he said, ‘I do like the way you negotiate.’