On the way to Bradley’s house, I think about what Mum said. Bradley lives his vlog. He starts monitoring traffic delays on Google from 6:00 a.m. He’s the real deal, but he keeps it professional and he knows who he is and who his audience is. And so does Erin (more than 1,000 new subscribers). I’m still struggling, and the more I think about it, the more I get in a knot.
When I get to his room, Bradley is looking at the evening rush hour in different cities. He keeps one eye on me and one eye on congestion. The traffic patterns and maps give him a sort of joy. I try to get his head away from problems in Rome and Athens and on to my phenomenal news.
“I’ve got some incredible news for you. My agent wants to represent Huevos!”
Bradley does not pull the face that I thought he would. I wonder if he’s just discovered a major jam in Paris or something.
“Oh,” he replies. “I want Huevos to enjoy his life without the need for clicks. He’ll join me in lift vlogging, but I don’t want him to be a star. So, thanks, but no thanks!”
“He’s a dog!” I yell.
“And I want him to stay that way,” Bradley replies calmly. “He has feelings. Your cat has changed since she has become a superstar. I want Huevos to stay the way he is.”
“Bradley!” I say. “Huevos thinks he’s a cat. HE IS NOT NORMAL.”
“There is no normal, Millie!” Bradley shouts quite sharply. “I am surprised at you for using such a terrible phrase.”
I’m embarrassed, too.
“I’m sorry,” I whisper.
The truth is, Bradley came up with a brilliant vlog, and now I’ve got to surpass myself yet again. It feels like I’m in a juicer. The pressure is always on. I’ve got to squeeze more good vlogs out and get rid of the pulp.
I look at Bradley. I can see that he’s thinking of a way to try to make me feel better. He rubs his finger over his chin, and his glasses slip down his nose, and he creases his forehead. It’s hard to read Bradley, but I’m getting to know his wide range of faces now.
“Traffic can teach you about life, Millie.”
This is typical of Bradley. It all boils down to the things that he loves.
“Look at all these people on my iPad. They are all stuck, but there’s nothing they can do about it. The smart ones just accept that and move on. The stupid ones are currently yelling at other drivers and increasing their risk of having a heart attack.”
I don’t really get what Bradley is getting at. Everyone around me seems to be growing immense philosophical systems to cope with life. I used to be the sensible one. Now, I feel like I’m constantly looking for a mind chauffeur to drive me around life.
“What’s your point, Bradley?”
Bradley walks from one side of the room to the other. “My point is that you should just go with the flow!”
My flow very strongly says that Huevos should appear on my vlog on a regular basis. Dave and Huevos love each other. It’s excellent pet socialization, it’s fantastic for the vlog, I would get to see Bradley more and I’m scared of telling Lydia Portancia that Huevos is not for sale. I know, though, there’s no point arguing with Bradley. Huevos’s profile is remaining on a private locked setting.
I’m annoyed, but I try to hide it.
“Thanks, Bradley. Anyway. Got to go. I’m messaging Danny. We’ve arranged to speak the moment he lands.”
Bradley looks at his watch. “Surely he’s landed by now? Is he on the world’s slowest plane?”
This is full-on Bradley snark.
“He’ll still be trying to shift his body clock, you know. He might have fallen asleep on the airport transport bus.”
“Or he may be seeing … other people,” Bradley mumbles.
I don’t like Bradley’s tone. He’s getting a bit full of himself. I need to tell him that Danny and me are 24-karat-gold SOLID.
“We really miss each other, you know, Bradley!”
Bradley raises his eyebrows. “Yeah, I bet Danny is dreaming of you right now.”
This is a sarcastic comment too far. I’m wearing wedge Converse. I have extra height and extra power.
“Look, I don’t pry into your private life. Danny and me are just FINE, thanks very much—”
Bradley interrupts me with some volume. “You can pry! I don’t care. I don’t have a girlfriend at the moment. This will shock you, Millie, but it’s possible for a boy to be friends with a girl!”
“I know that!” I shout. “We manage it, don’t we?”
Bradley pauses. “Okay, calm down, Millie.”
There’s “calm down” again. I am perfectly calm, thank you. I just have a magnificent handle on my own justified rage. I can see, though, that he looks a bit crestfallen after my comment. I’m not sorry to have put him in his place. If Bradley gives it, I am going to give it back.
I think Bradley knows he’s gone too far. He looks at me and smiles.
“Perhaps Huevos can be a guest star sometimes.”
This is a Bradley peace offering and I accept it. I give him a hug, put Dave in her carrier, and head home. Danny is due to land at 7:00 p.m. our time. I think. To be honest, I’ve put Toronto in the world clock section of my phone. International time zones are very confusing when you do the math in your head.